I’ve yet to jump into the bowl; but certainly appreciate these discussions. I've learned lots.

Two things on my mind: one, I’m interested in an arrangement precisely because it’s not P4P...unlike some of the elders here, to me a relationship has some appeal.  So I am generally okay with the idea of an allowance or similar. But I wouldn’t be moved to get to that level without at least some emotional chemistry...how much runway is there before that gets real?   How many meetings before your SB gets antsy (in your expeirence -- obviously YMMV).

And speaking of allowances... the SA chart showing $5,000-10,000 a month for the higher end is a bit imtimidating.  Is $1000 or $1500 a month embarrassingly low?

Thanks

-- Modified on 3/12/2018 9:57:56 PM

You have to consider how often you want to meet.  If you meet twice a month for a couple hours, $1000 is pretty high.  You might as well stick with escorts.  If you meet every week, $1000 starts to become slightly more reasonable, especially if your meetings are multi-hour.

A couple thoughts: Something that feels more like a 'relationship' is certainly available
here, but don't become lulled into the illusion that if the $$$ stops, the 'relationship'
will continue....That would be a wonderful outcome, but rare indeed.

Many women on the site prefer the trappings and stylistic accoutrements of a normal
'dating' interchange because it makes them feel less like they are providing sex for money.

Emotional chemistry, just as in real life, is either there immediately, can be developed,
or is absent; Just remember the despite how 'connected' you may feel, stop paying and
watch the sugar disappear.

Only the 'minimal' lifestyle category allows for $1000.- a month.....l generally ignore their
profile choice and evaluate each SB on her own merits upon meeting; but some of them,
not necessarily the most attractive ones, are dead serious about 3-5k or more per month
and are quite put out when offered less. Somehow, there are men on the site with that
much spare cash per SB to keep the smokescreen going, unfortunately.

Very few SBs will stand for more than two unrecompensed meetings, so if you haven't
'set the hook' by then you will have to pay to watch them chew food.

If you manage to arrange 4 BCD meetings per month at an 'allowance' of $1000.-,  
remember dinners, hotels, and gifts are additional to that number, and can easily  
top $250 -$350 per meeting; note that same $500 - $600 per meet would get you  
a pretty memorable, versatile time with an upscale escort in almost any market....

I have found that the truly exceptional SBs in the SoCal area know their value,
and are not available for less than $600 - $1000.- per meet, sorry not sorry as they say.

If I understand your first question, you are wondering how long it takes to establish the kind of emotional chemistry that elevates an arrangement into a meaningful relationship, is that correct?  In my experience it happens right away, after one coffee date and one BCD date. The connection feels very intense, the sex is amazing for both parties, and the conversation after the sex, when we are both relaxed and our defenses are down,  gives me an opportunity to talk to her on a deep level and often to impress her with my insightful comments.  I've played with many SBs in the past 3.5 years.  Exactly 3 became real relationships of this type.  

As for an allowance, I never pay in advance.  I think it limits everyone's freedom and independence and creates feelings of obligation and entitlement which are deadly to a fine affectionate arrangement.  Gift per visit is the best option by far.  And if you re serious about one of these SBs and you both are eager to see each other frequently, GPV could easily wind up putting more money in her pocket than a "regular allowance".

If you're new to SA, you should pretty much learn to ignore their marketing gimmicks, their lifestyle chart is one of them. The site has blogs on it and there is some interesting  banter going on between the SD's, and SB's.   I believe the area you are in has a lot to do with it.  The ratio of SB's to SD's is tremendously high in my area, and cash is king.  My search with a 25 mile range turns up +9000 , and a 50 mile range turns up the maxed out counter 10K plus, I estimate a real count of probably 18K, as it includes Orlando ( of course includes inactive/abandoned profiles).  A lot of turnover in my area, SB's get frustrated with the lack of success.  Read this forum, a lot of good information on here.  

The establishment of a genuine relationship seems to be key for you, so why not go to a venue where the gal is also looking for that kind of relationship?

 
As for chemistry, it does not really develop - it's either there or it isn't, and usually you know right away.

 
That said, even the traditional P4P is not devoid of genuine relationships.   My current wife is an ex-provider whom I met through the hobby.   I see several other gals, some for decades now, and we have genuine caring relationships.

Have to agree, IGNORE the "Lifestyle Expectation".  Contacted a pot SB with one that said "High" and sure enough she wanted 2 to 3 meets per WEEK at $500/meet.  I proceeded to tell her how that was outside of almost everybody's ability with rare exceptions, especially in rural SC.  Also gave her other tips and asked her to stay in touch with how things go.  Today I got a message from her that she hasn't had any dates and she was desperate and would take anything.  Nothing triggers the "spidey sense" like screams of desperation from a POT SB.  I told her to change her expectations from High to Moderate or Negotiable  because some guys actually screen those out, and put more in her profile about what she gives (tastefully of course-like the phrase "I love evenings in ")and less about what she wants.  Her pics aren't that great...not bad but not great.

1. Lifestyle Expectations are created by SA not the SB. You can safely ignore it unless she comes back on 1st or 2nd message with some reference to it or she's puts additional hints in her profile text.  Then just avoid.  
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2. There are SD profiles that show income as $5-25+ million and net worth as $10-100+ million.  SB's see that and think it's all Richard Gere time. My guess is 99% of those SD profiles are total bullshit and/or scammers.  But it can influence a new SB's perception and expectations - at first.  
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3. I'd advise staying away from monthly for at least 6 months (a year is even better). Help her do the math that 4 visits per month at "x per visit" equals her monthly target. That establishes that she must contribute as much to the arrangement as you do (time vs money). If you finally get to some level of emotionally stable platform then go monthly if you are willing to risk losing a full month's allowance if she ghosts you, AND if it's more convenient/easier to hide/etc. for you to make a single payment.  
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4. When determining YOUR sugar budget, remember two key dynamics: First, she will only care or even acknowledge the actual cash you give her. Money spent on meals, hotels, travel, shopping for bling, concerts, spa days, etc. are all good to make her feel spoiled/special/appreciated/blah, blah, blah, and for some SB's the "luxury lifestyle" is important (or they think it is) to them. But it's the cash in hand that will ultimately keep her coming back.  Next, all those other things just mentioned are fucking expensise and you need to ensure you include them in your budget.  As noted above, a $300 per meet allowane (so maybe $1,200 a month if you meet weekly) can easily become a $2,500 a month spend if you are hooking her up with plush crap and experiences.  
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Think these through when you search for SB's and when you start negotaitons.  Try to assess where the SB is on Maslow's hierarchy of needs when you make an offer (see link). The lower they are (food & shelter) the more staright cash is critical. They higher they are (self-actualization) the more they want the bling to make them feel special or to show off to thier 'ho' friends.   I have an SB in my rotation who regualrly posts on snapchat and instagram when she's in a fancy hotel, at top artist concerts, expensive restaurants, crusie ships, etc. She always appears solo in the posts (I'm never seen or mentioned) and never actually explains how she can afford all that glamour when she makes minimum wage part time.  What's interesting is that she doesn't realize I follow her on both apps. I always get a chuckle when she posts and and I can hear my voice or see my hand in the background. The comments from her female and make followers are a good read as well.

Do they still teach Maslow’s Hierarchy?  My goodness I haven’t heard this since the 80’s.

I learned it in the 70's in high school. But it's still relevant to understanding human behavior today. And winning in the sugar is all about mutual understanding.  Using models like this, along with some basic lessons in behavioral sciences (Pavlov, Hawthorne studies, etc.), plus a solid understanding of selling skills can really help understand how to meet POT SB's that have a higher likelihood of entering into a successful arrangement with you at a sugar rate that both believe is mutually and equally beneficial.  
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Now some of you may be thinking this is about "mind fucking" some dumb SB, but it's not. At least not for me. Using these tools for "evil" purposes will ultimately lead to shorter arrangements and possibly undesired reactions from SB's who figiure out, or think, you are taking advantage of them.

Yes,  I was wrong it was the 70’s!  😉

I’ve had three SBs go into the relationship territory. I call this is the point where they’d bang you whether money is on the table or not.  With my girls,  the chemistry was there immediately, love at first site both ways and mind blowing sex right off the bat as well.  With all three, there was always very little discussion of money. Only the first couple of meetings were “paid”. After that, they just asked for favors, maybe rent here or buying books there. All three have had many sessions with me where no money was mentioned or exchanged.  

How much they end up costing depends on their own earning power. The first one was a pro and she ended up costing about $1500/month for about 2-3 dates a week. Second one was a student with part time job. She cost about $600/month for about 2 all out fuck fests a month. These were overnighters or short trips where we’d bang 2-3 times a day. The current one costs about $3k a month lately because I pretty much support her since she stopped stripping but before that she only cost about $1000/month. We fuck every chance we get. Almost every day and up to 4x a day. We text constantly and talk nonstop. I am not including the costs of what we do together, like hotel rooms or food. I am only counting cash or things I buy for her.  

So yes, what you’re looking for is doable although it may not be easy.  Whether it happens is up to chance and what you bring to the table. I don’t know for sure if I could find others like I have now. I doubt I will find anyone else like my current favorite any time soon.