Dear L G,

i am into my late 40s, and since i can remember i have had a strong fetish to stockings and especially pantyhose. About 10 years ago, i reached the point that if a lady wasn't wearing either pantyhose or stockings, i could not get sexually aroused. Bare legs no matter how sexy and beautiful they are just don't turn me on. This fetish of mine has seriously impacted my marital life since my wife just HATES pantyhose and does like to wear stockings (she thinks they are for whores and strippers. She got religion after our second son died in an accident several years ago).
As you might have guessed, i was "forced" to seek solace by having, over the years, several mistresses (i am a very handsome and wealthy man, so finding extra-marital activities has never been a problem for me). However, mistresses usually are synonymous with headaches. Unlike me, women i dated could not compartmentalize and protect their emotional lives from their sexual ones. And they always end up asking me if i were willing or when i was going to leave my wife whom i love deeply despite everything, and which i will never leave even if that means i would be sexually frustrated for the rest of my life.

So, lately i discovered this hobby and i have to say that it lifted a heavy burned from my shoulder. One less worry to worry about since it follows the basic principals of a business transaction. Sorry for this rumbling, but i felt it was necessary to give you brief personal background. My question is: what can i do to diminish or decrease or even eliminate my fetish besides therapy because it has  not yielded any results so far? Or  am i too old to change as my last mistress, who is a psychologist by the way, told me once?

Sincerely
Yours

Dear hosepassion,

I should hope there are worse things to worry about than pantyhose. In any event, it's a truly harmless and lovely fetish. If you want to enter therapy for it, go right ahead, but I'm inclined to agree with your mistress/psychologist.

I'm probably experiencing way too much countertransference explaining this question because guess what - I have a pantyhose fetish too!!!! I love all forms of hosiery, as I should: they make any leg over 30 look beautiful and so much more lovely!

Please read the attached link....and then go ahead and be a hosemonster, LOL,
the Love Goddess

LOL.

Hosepassion, I wonder if there isn't some internet community where lovers of pantyhose and stockings can meet.  Might be worth googling the subject.

Why must your fetish be a problem?  Sounds harmless enough to me.  We all have our own sexual preferences - nothing is really strange.

I don't think your fetish is at all disturbing. I absolutely love to wear stockings, any kind or color with any outfit. I wear them under business suits with the seam up the back of the leg, you should see the looks I get at (my real job).

I think if you find an escort ( I use the term lover) whom you find a connection with she won't hesitate to indulge in your fetish with you. I do nearly every time whether the gentleman likes it or not. I have never had a man disappointed when I open the door in a pair of thigh high's!

I don't think you are too old to change but you can also take your wife to a few stores, Victoria's Secret being one of them and have a heart to heart talk to her about why you like them and how beautiful that you think they would make her. No matter how much religion someone has they are not immune to compliments. Let her pick what she wants.

If this is not a route you are willing to take and you obviously sound devoted to your wife try continuing to see the escort of your choice. If all else fails you can visualize your atf wearing the stockings and try and see if this will help with your intimacy issues at home. Best of luck to you.

Alyssa

Thank you LG for your comforting words and especially thank you for sharing the fact that you have a mild pantyhose/stockings fetish.

Alyssa, i tried everything that you said in your previous post with my wife. I have been married for about 22 years now and i can tell what works and what doesn't. Though she a body made for lingerie, she is absolutely against all kind of lingerie since she was born again. Anything that is sheer and has lace on it is evil and it is lustful, thus sinful.  I do love her though and i respect her opinion.

Alyssa i am often in Atlanta since a big chunk of my business is there. So, maybe i will give you a call. What do you think?

Get a more modern translation (not the King James version) of the Bible and have your wife read SONG OF SOLOMON... Pretty erotic stuff...hard to argue that any form of sex between husband and wife is "evil and lustful, thus sinful" after reviewing that particular text right from the good book itself-- I mean it is "God's Word", after all- right?...

Sorry for your woes-- she's missing out on one of the greatest gifts she can give you in marriage--

-- Modified on 8/3/2007 8:08:56 PM

in a previous lifetime, according to a palm reader.

It did sound familiar when I read it too.

By the way, Bev was Bathsheeba.

I cannot help you except to say that I'm in your same boat.  I've come to accept my fascination with women in pantyhose/stockings.  It isn't really a fetish for me since it isn't necessary for me to find sexual excitement or gratification.  I classify it more as a kink in my psyche.  When I was younger (teenager/early 20’s) and I fought the attraction, I found myself much more obsessed.  At some point, I simply accepted my kink and my obsession was substantially lessened.  Now it is a fun thing like my desire for chocolate or driving fast or playing golf. I cannot understand some men's obsession with really large breasts or asses, why attraction to stocking-clad legs isn't any different in my mind.

Let go and enjoy!!  That being said, I cannot convince my wife to wear them for me and it is my one request for the other women I see.  

-- Modified on 8/4/2007 9:15:58 AM

I can't add much to Bluedoor's comments, except to second them heartily.

I have a real fascination with womens' shoes and ankle bracelets and petticured feet.  Not an obsesion, buit my interest is more than just a passing fancy.  Learn to accept your desire, learn to integrate it into your total carnal experience, and then embrace it positively.  It's like a great appetizer before a great meal, and great dessert following the great meal.  Enjoy, and you will enjoy even more.