The longer you will be there, the more likely some SB will be available.  I recall one guy posting about trying to meet someone on a 1-day visit, which can be a challenge.   I was in Tampa for 6 days, which made things easier.

I didn't do a preliminary meet, though I could have because the trip was long enough.  If my comfort level had not been high enough, I would have tried that.  

It was clear that several POTs were down for BCD.   There was no misunderstanding about platonic only or anything of that nature.  Once that was established, I simply asked "Is there anything that you particularly like (or dislike) in the bedroom?" and followed up from there.  What I was trying to do was to inform the SB that I was interested in her pleasure (what she likes) and was willing to avoid her taboos (what she doesn't like).  Most POTs gave me enough feedback to guide my decision.  Very few of them were explicit, and some required some followup discussion.

Here were some replies:

"I love to suck dick."  This was the most explicit, though she didn't like DATY.

"I don't do oral on a first date."  Another said, "I do oral only with a real-life BF."

A few said they didn't like to kiss.

Some said they like everything or most things.  Then I followed up with, "I like kissing and caressing, was well as giving and receiving oral stimulation.  Do you like oral?"  

I wasn't very direct or crude.  No one seemed offended by my wording, though some declined because I said oral was important to me.

The woman I would up seeing (twice) was a European immigrant who was very fit, beautiful, sweet, and sexual.  The kissing was limited, but the BBBJTCNQNS and MSOG were very good.  Unfortunately, she dropped off SA a couple of months later.