In my experience, even those who claim they don't want to mess up anyone's marriage are more concerned about attracting drama into their own lives than they are about causing trouble for others.  None of these SBs want an angry wife showing up at their door making a scene, stalking them, outing them, whatever.  Remember, if a married guy can afford a sugar baby, his suspicious wife can afford a private detective!

That is why I always tell my SBs that I am very happily married, and that my wife and I are in a long term open, poly, ENM relationship.  She knows about my sugar dating and approves completely.  Zero drama, jealousy or deceit.  She has even become friends with several of my SBs!  This defuses the "no married men" argument completely.  And also happens to be true!

However, more than a few gals have told me that they see themselves as saving marriages rather than wrecking them.

 
The thought is that a horny guy who either is cut off from sex by his wife or is seeking more varied sex practices is going to find that sex either with a pro, or is going to start fooling around with people in his personal life from the office, neighborhood, or even church.   Being with the pro is going to be a lot less messy and prevent the blow-up that will inevitably occur if he chooses any of the latter options.

 
In the meantime, he can continue to be the good husband and father, thus continuing harmony of his life.   Maybe not the most honest and open set of circumstances, but hey, what else is new?

If you assume that most women are motivated from narcissistic aims, you will still get a varied reaction to the concept of marriage.  Women will want their mate to be loyal and therefore form opinions about non-loyal men.  Women are also attracted to high value men who they know are less likely to remain loyal.  These two opposites both serve their narcissism. And hence how they feel about is likely to alternate by the day or the hour.
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The SB I saw the other week is married and cheating on her hubby.  She can't host and has to come up with reasons to sneak out.  I am married and have seen some SB adds saying they are not interested in married men.  But those are rare, at least the explicit ones are rare.  I can't say how many of the SB's that have turned me down (the vast majority) factor in my marital status.  I'm of the opinion, however, that if I were viewed as high status, my martial situation would figure less in their calculation.

Because of my situation, I was very clear in my profile that I could not meet frequently, and that travel was not an option.  Those by themselves may suggest that I'm in a SO relationship.  Maybe if I misrepresented myself in my profile, I would not have gotten that question.

 
The point that the SB may be looking to avoid drama if it turns out that the SD is bad at keeping the sugar relationship secret (of which, I'm sure there are plenty).

Although I'm relatively new to the bowl, I have used the following response 4 times as my status is listed as "Open Relationship" and each time the lady's was basically the same: "Great, thanks for letting me know. Let's chat off-site, my cell is xxx-xxx-xxxx."

Here's my explanation (btw, it's all 100% true only part I leave out is my wife is very turned on by the thought of me with other women and she has chosen, so far, to remain monogamous):

"Thanks for reaching out. I have been married to the same amazing person for 30 years. We are both free to have connections with others (including intimate). It has actually strengthened our marriage and has allowed us to also forge meaningful relationships with others - whether they be long term or shorter in nature. I am open and respectful to everyone I meet and love making new connections. What you are looking for seems to be in alignment with this. That said, I completely understand if this doesn't work for you. If you're interested to pursue things further perhaps a text and meet for coffee or lunch makes sense?"