What do you do when a potential SB threatens to turn your private space into a crime scene?
Good thinking on how to use the phone to get rid of her.
Too bad that many hotels no longer have room phones. No one uses them anymore.
Moral of the story to me: Don't skip the meet and greet.
First, you handled it rather well, of course. And I assume that it was effective because you booked a higher-end hotel. I can't imagine this ploy convincing her at a Holiday Inn, or Motel 6. I assume you realized her was throwing strong UTR hooker drama at you in the hope you would crumble in fear of her tantrum. And you flipped that script perfectly.
Do you think you could have picked up any deeper insight into her personality or other red flags if you continued to chat over drinks at the bar a bit longer?
I rarely ask for, or agree to go BCD on the M&G. Yes, it's extra time that may not be available if on travel. But I see value in using that time to see a full picture of how she arrives, conducts herself during, and then communicates after our first meeting. That means, I probably have a lower close-rate than you, Rock. But I also appear to have less (but certainly NOT zero!) drama in my BCD dates.
Thank you for sharing. I shall add the "fake call hotel security" tactic to my emergency toolbox.
Life is good
The Cat
You are right, HTC. It was not a low-end hotel, but was nice enough to have a hotel restaurant/bar and phones in the rooms. Fish is correct that hotels are phasing them out (long overdue but maybe required by some state laws?).
I have always thought of the standalone M&G as a waste of time I cannot afford, since I sugar when traveling. There may not be enough time to see her a second time for BCD before I have to leave town, and it never works to ask her to wait 1 or 2 weeks for that 2nd date.
But I may need to reconsider. I have viewed the M&G as her imposition on me, but perhaps I need to see it as my way to safeguard against a disastrous scenario, provided I can detect psycho chicks or hookers at the M&G.
You asked if I thought I might have detected red flags if we'd had that drink at the bar first. There's no way to know for sure, but the answer is somewhere between possibly and probably. With this particular chick, I'd say yes. I think I would have smelled the desperation before I finished a drink.
That's the kind of M&G I don't mind; grab a drink or a bite first when the plan is to spend the whole evening together, as long as we're both enthusiastic. I've ended many dates after the drink or meal because I just didn't see her as a compatible SB. But in this case -- with toss-the-joint girl -- I just got lazy. She showed me a red flag all right; she didn't need to vet me! I was lazy, thinking with the wrong head, and got some unpleasant drama.
Any other gents want to weigh in with advice or experience?
Rockford
M&G in advance. Or on video chat. Not just agreeing over text. Huge difference in her attitude if you have lunch together first. Unlike Herb, I don't want to wait to get laid. I will plan for a BCD right after if we hit it off. If she 'doesn't' have time I'm clear there is no allowance just for the M&G. Some girls are fine with that. Usually ones that are still unsure of whether they want to go through with it. I don't ever want a sex partner uncomfortable so I'm cool with feeling me out as well.
Side note, I'm going to remember your phone trick. Hopefully never have to use it.
I hope I can be as thoughtful as you if I am ever facing that situation. Glad you came out in one piece.
First, you handled that incredibly well. Kudos for quick and intelligent response. I learned something today, that hopefully I will never use.
Got robbed once (cash and dash), but never had to kick someone out.
I have made it a practice to agree to everything via text, and offer two options 1) M&G only 2) M&G + BCD if both comfortable. Out of 100+ unique BCD initial meetings, only two have chosen option 1 (no bcd on first meeting), which I generally prefer. Almost always a hotel bar meeting, and half of those have skipped the bar part (usually bc bar is closed).
Regarding no phone in hotel rooms, I have yet to encounter that 🤷♂️
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