I just crossed my 6 month anniversary in the ‘Bowl and thought I’d share some updated learnings, in addition to what I’ve previously posted.
- It was far easier than I imagined to build a full (and I do mean full) roster of SBs.  I had modest success from the get go, but once I really put some effort into my profile, my response rate went up dramatically, with a strong written profile and 6 or so pics of me in various settings.  Every time I went on vacation or work trip, I typically made a point to post a new picture with (general) location and month/year as a watermark.
**Lesson learned: Take the time to create a compelling profile.  Mix in some humor, kindness, humility, etc (or whoever you are) and your results will absolutely show a return on your effort.
- I spent some (ok, a lot of) time to develop organizational systems.  I have a structured way to organize SB POTs, scheduled M&Gs and BCDs, etc.  I developed groupings for SBs (e.g., on demand, date night, travel-worthy, kinky), all with some demographic info noted.  I maintained this list in a text I’d sent to a burner number so I always had a record of most recent (in my sent texts, and I’d delete all older texts on the same thread) and historical record (in received texts on the burner number, which I would clean out from time to time).  My SA system is as follows: I am very selective (would go as far as to say tactical) in my searches.  When a SB meets my very specific criteria, I add them as a Favorite, and would only message them once they were online (best chance of getting a response!).  Once I sent a message, I would unfavorite them.  If they responded, I would reply and move the conversation to Archive until we had a bit of a back and forth, agreed on expectations, then I would them into my Inbox until we met.  If it took more than a few ‘back and forths’ to agree to meet for a (platonic) coffee, they never left Archive.   This kept my inbox clean and kept me from looking at a bunch of stale messages so I could focus my attention on those that were responsive and moving forward.  On a very small number of occasions, I have sent a second message to a SB if they were extra compelling for whatever reason.
**Lesson learned: Take time to implement some structure.  You only have so much time (and resources) so being organized will make it easier.
- Refine your negotiation technique.  The Cat is the master of this and I’ve paid close attention to his approach.  I trust my Spidey sense to know whether to offer what I’ve budgeted (and it’s never about what they’re worth) vs ask for their expectation.  I’ve met amazing SBs where they’ve agreed to my budget which is (sometimes much) lower than what they typically ask because we build a rapport. Conversely, I met a very compelling POT recently who asked for one rose for weeknights and two roses for weekends.
**Lesson learned:  There are more SBs than SDs and never forget the supply/demand dynamic.
- After 6 months I had met so many SBs I literally had too many to manage, so I politely and kindly let most of my roster know I had entered into an exclusive arrangement and I’d love to stay in touch, grab lunch once in a while, but that would be it.  Some never responded back (which is an amazing bit of self-selection!), most said thanks/best of luck/let me know when you can support me again (etc) and I was really surprised how many asked to still meet up occasionally/casually from time to time as we’d become actual friends.
**Lesson learned: Actively manage your SBs (cull the herd), be kind and don’t string anyone along.
- After six months of grinding (in more ways than one!), I am happy to share I’ve deactivated my SA profile. My SBs have been very carefully curated, invested in and provide me with more than I’ve ever thought possible from the ‘Bowl.
**Lessons learned: Take time to celebrate success and don’t get stuck in the hamster wheel of ‘more…’

Hope that helps!

Sounds like your approach is excellent and is working great for you!  Congrats!  I get the impression that you live in a very target rich area, so some of your approaches would not work for guys who live in Pussy Siberia as I do.  You have the luxury of being extremely selective and only approaching the ones who meet your stringent requirements. To give you an idea of just how limited other areas are, when I do my normal search it's for my location plus 100 miles, limited to 18-35, body types slim, average athletic, and I only get 1011  hits!  I would love to only send messages to the ones who are online, but that's a number close enough to zero it's not a sustainable strategy.  Instead, I limit myself to only messaging those who have been active within the past 2 weeks, even though I know some of them will never return.  My list of possibles is only 197 active withon 2 weeks. And of those, only a very few actually appeal to me.  By the time I eliminate the obvious scammers, GPS, etc, my opportunities are very few.  I favorite every single one that appeals to me.  I send at least one message, sometimes several follow ups if she doesn't reply right away and if she's hot enough!  And I keep my profile on the site continuously, never take it down or pause.  My results have been amazing considering the lack of SBs here.  I have 2 incredibly hot and adoring 24 year olds, one stunning 34 yo,  I had a wonderful m&g with a model slim/gorgeous 23 yo I'll be seeing again soon and am having a great conversation with a slim 26yo AA girl who seems eager to meet and get busy.  So, my point is, adapt all the good advice you get here to suit your own style and your own environment.  If an old guy in siberia like me can make it work, so can you!

-- Modified on 4/8/2022 11:32:36 PM