I was talking with a client the other day who said that he had hesitated in seeing me because of what an ex friend of mine had been saying about me in the chat rooms. This "lady" at one time had been a very good friend of mine, but due to a misunderstanding she decided that she no longer wished to continue our friendship. I told her I was sorry she felt that way, wished her well and sadly said goodbye.

Now I find out that she has taken the issue public and is trying to hurt my business, by telling made up stories about me in public chats. I have tried to be the bigger person and look the other way, but I can no longer afford to so.
Any suggestions on how best to deal with this toxic individual?

-- Modified on 5/4/2004 9:08:10 PM

-- Modified on 5/4/2004 9:12:34 PM

-- Modified on 5/4/2004 9:14:29 PM

Megan

Let that SH** go. First off, if she ended the friendship over a misunderstanding, then she wasn't a friend in the first place.
Secondly, if she calls herself blowing you up in chatrooms, that should tell you right there she has way too much time on her hands. People like that are insecure.
Don't worry about it, especially if people that know or meet you  see that you are totally opposite of what she says, she's just making herself look stupid.

Kisses,

Starrlah

-- Modified on 5/4/2004 11:32:54 PM

If she doesn't keep her mouth shut then can she be my slave? Please? Oh, I could use one to wash my g-strings and cinch my corset. Not to mention writing out my checks for jaywalking tickets.

Lets see if that works. Flattery can get you everywhere, especially with a bi-sexual provider. OW! My fairy godmother just kicked me under the table.

You have great reviews.

I would refute whatever she says on this board.  You may or may
not want to give the handle of the person.

BTW, luv your pics,
fr

and You will be the Winner in the long run! Believe me, people will see the cattiness (not a pretty site) on her part. Don't stoop to her level, as you have Way more Class than that.

Karma, will come back to bite her in the ass in the long run, always does.

Continue, being the Sweetheart, that you are and You'll always be a Winner!

Hugs,

Kelly~


-- Modified on 5/4/2004 11:39:33 PM

It happens, Megan...this is a business involving relationships, and unfortunately, when anger comes into play, things may be said or done that affect your business.  As Kelly so rightfully said, keep to the high road.  You'll feel better about it in the long run.

Not to minimize what you're going through, but a colleague of mine and I are going through a "difference of professional opinion."  I had a long talk with my boss about it last week, and he (being a former nuclear engineer) calmed me down by reminding me that hurtful statements have a short half-life...that is, in a day or two, they hurt half as much as they did to start with.  After five half-lives, the effect these things have on you is negligible.  (Sure enough, the things this guy said on Monday didn't bother me by Friday.)

Wait it out, Megan, and in the meantime, be your classy self.  

Yoda

Megan,

Why you’re choosing to take this public is beyond me. You of all people should know by now I am the most straight up person you’ll ever meet. And you could have come to me instead of taking this public. The reasons why I ended our friendship is between us....I do miss our friendship but it was best for the both of us to end it.

My forwardness has gotten me into trouble before but you always know where you stand with me. I’ve always went to you directly about any disagreements we had in the past and would still do so now.

I did exchange PM’s with a TER member about a week ago. He asked me if I knew you and if you were a good provider. I said you were a nice person, had good reviews and he could use my name as a referral. The next day I e-mailed you regarding this client and gave you the thumbs up on him. (Said he was a great guy and if you had any questions, please feel free to contact me) You know who he is and can verify what I stated.

You need to take a step back and think about the timing of the crap that’s being feed to you. It didn’t start until you started hanging out with your new "toxic" friend (and from your old friend who has done nothing but try to start crap between us for a long time) Our friendship ended a few months ago and we never had any problems until this person came into the picture.

If you would like to talk about this, please feel free to contact me personally as I will not respond again here.

Marcella

My suggestion...

Visit her or give her a call and "kiss and make up"

Life is too short to let the minor BS in life get you and her down...ITS NOT WORTH THE AGGRAVATION!..also heresay is not always whats being said so...
Get it directly from the source and work it out, Megers.
You'll both feel greatly relieved and then you can both move on without each other in a respectable manner or you can remain friends again.

Cheers!


-- Modified on 5/5/2004 4:47:09 AM

and after reading about some of your bawdy sexcapades...
I'm sure your motive is to be there when "they DFK and make up"

Tally-Ho!

Btw...from your earlier comments...these two LA providers must be considered aliens on your account?

General advise here, this is not an attempt to get involved with those spatting.

You need to be true to yourself.  Defend yourself when you need to and remember that most ladies in your market will not have your best interest at heart.  

After all the damage is done, who benefits from taking things backchannel anyway?  Yes, the guys will say they don't want to hear it, but they'll get over it.  If she continues, eventually your community will be sick of her perpetual PMS and harass her for taking dumps on their playground. If she's smart, once will be enough.  

Most come your way with an agenda.  It takes time to find someone who can be your friend.

-- Modified on 5/5/2004 9:38:06 AM

Oh contraire, mon fraire(I think that's how it goes)...

these two gorgeous providers are the antithesis of alien!

 ...besides VonRyan would never, ever consider
an extra-terrestrial affair.

although...before dispencing my sage advice...Thought about suggesting they settle this matter in a mud wrestling contest but... alas...my sanity prevailed...but what a picture in my mind remains.I hope they can work it out.

Cheers!

Btw...ole' Dirk...sounds like you've been hanging around Piccadilli circus too long.

Ignore it and it will go away.  Fight back and you just keep it going that much longer......

OK, I am just doing this so I can see if I can get my other foot in my already too big mouth but here goes. First off, I have had the unpleasant experience of hearing both sides of this story and of course, given my respect for Marcella, I am biased. However, I do not know Megan and do not understand the dynamics of whatever happened between them. But I do know, that given Megan's relatively onesided post, I am at a loss to understand why anyone would support this post without knowing more? This should never have been taken to the boards since it is very one sided and not a lot of information is given to the reader, except of course, from one point of view, sorry but this seems to me to be some sort of chat vile overflow,( which I have also witnessed) and there is way more to this than the information that has been supplied in this post. Personally, I am really tired of all the backstabbing and bad mouthing that I have personally witnessed lately, it shows a true lack of character and absolutely no class. As staff has been known to say on more than one occasion, if we aren't having fun, we are doing it wrong, peace and luv, Dana (ok the shoe is out of my mouth, whew, anyone want to play? lol

Reon't feed the trolls....

I take offense to that comment. How am I supposed to eat if no one is dropping crumbs over the bridge. Do you have ANY idea how much eating goats day in and day out SUCKS? I just want a "Kitty" now and again...sigh.

I think they should glove up and we put it on Pay Per View.

I think this is a case where if Megan had posted under an alias, she could have made some general overall points about people trashing others in public chat rooms. It would have been a good reminder to all of us to be polite, that it can backfire, etc.

But when you use your own name, it starts getting personal. Everyone wonders if there's an agenda, and that there must be more to the story. Then the other person jumps in to tell her side of the story, etc. Who the heck is anyone supposed to believe....and do we really care if most of us don't know the ladies anyway?

Although this is an important personal issue to the two ladies involved, to be honest, Megan and Marcella, the providers and hobbyists on the board really aren't interested in your personal feuds, or anybody else's.

Hobbyists know women have little catfights behind the scenes all the time. Another catfight isn't going to hurt Megan's or Marcella's business...unless it's blown out of proportion by hitting the national boards, and then one or more of the ladies may look foolish and undesirable by her posts.

Sure, it's good to bring up the examples of  good behavior or bad behavior, or ask for advice on how to handle behind the scenes bickering...but please, let's leave out the names and personal information. Thanks.

it is Marcella. Talk about twisting the situation around.  If I had it to do over again I would have posted under an alias,I had never wanted any names to be mentioned here. I am very surprised Marcella came out. Stupid, stupid, stupid. Only validated what I had said before,  All I wanted was for the situation to stop, but it appears it hasn't........ . Thank you all for you kind words of wisdom support. She has really shown her true colors
Megan
PS Still have not received "the email"

-- Modified on 5/6/2004 3:45:39 PM

Why so surprised? You should know by now I will deal with matters directly and not hide under a alias or BC members with made up stories.

I think a apology is in order.........the client in question did phone you.

Marcella


PS
I really do hope you think before taking matters to a public form again.

I have nothing to be sorry for