I didn't want to sound like a bitch but I feel the sme way. After spending the better part of 4 months going thru radiation therapy, I never really find any humor in mammograms or the therapy that goes along with finding you have cancer.
I know Mara was trying to keep a humor check on all of us. Sometimes the board gets way too serious, but I opened her post and cringed. Mara is a sweet girl and I enjoy her posts very much, so please forgive me if this sounds a bit harsh. But for the women out there, who like me, have been thru the ringer from the moment our doctor says "malignant" to the day we take a cab home from our last treatment this is not a laughing matter. Trust me, when you sit for a couple of months waiting on your checkup and pray for that clean bill of health, you find very little humor in jokes that pertain to any of it.
Mara, I know you meant no harm, but you might want to think about it a little before you post next time on a topic such as this.
xoxoxox
Lass...another survivor
-- Modified on 3/6/2003 3:39:22 PM
I deleted this post hoping you understand that I will not forget how I offended all of you. I would not leave a message up when I am aware it is offending all of you or even if it was offending some and not all. What my intentions were(just a joke) when I posted this is irrelevant, what is important is that it has been deleted by me.
Mara of San Diego
-- Modified on 3/6/2003 9:09:33 PM
Mara,
I’m appalled you use such a serious matter as mammography just so you can post a link to your reviews and web site. Please try to find other ways to plug your site.
It’s a damn shame women are afraid and don’t have all the correct information about mammography & breast cancer.
Please visit these site for information regarding mammography and breast cancer:
RSNA:
http://www.radiologyinfo.org/content/mammogram.htm
NABCO:
http://www.nabco.org/
Potential Benefits & Risks of Mammograms
http://mammography.ucsf.edu/inform/index.cfm
General Information on Mammography
http://imaginis.com/breasthealth/mammography.aspn
xoxo, Lizzie
It was funny..... take a breath. Please show some tolerence for a little humor. Lots of very serious things are looked at in jest. Haven`t you ever heard the "King of all Media" Howard Stern.
OK, maybe Mara was only joking but it was in bad taste to use this topic to post her web site.
Is it just me or are the rest of you getting tired of a few providers using every lame ass topic to post their web site?
BTW, Stern’s an a-hole and don’t tell me what to do........lol
xoxo, Lizzie
Yes Lizzie, I agree with you; Is it just me or are the rest of you getting tired of a few providers using every lame ass topic to post their web site?
Strange how you had no problem with the male-bashing jokes at the end. Guess your ox wasn't being gored, eh? Or is it that we are the last unprotected group? I'm sick of it - if we're so bloody awful, try getting $$$ to service your dildo.
Puck,
I didn't like the male bashing joke either but the mammography jokes hit a little closer to home for me. Sorry Puck, I should have addressed the lame jokes about men too . . .
Ampallang & SuperDave,
It’s amazing how quick some men are to tell me to take it easy, lighten up and call me a bitch. I bet if you were the ones having your penis pressed between two glass plates, you wouldn’t be so quick to jump on my ass.
xoxo, Lizzie
We all have our problems. When my wife had her leg amputated early last year, she changed her email address to "stumpy". She took it in stride. And who know....maybe I'd get off on having my dick squashed between glass plates??
The last unprotected group is the straight white males 18 to 65
His and his staffs ability to laugh at themselves makes the rotten treatment of others a little more acceptable to me.
The correct answer is Howard's radio show circa 1993. When Billy West left it was tettering, but with Jackie Martling's departure it's finally croaked.
Breast cancer is a serious matter, a mammogram is a test. My mother had a breast removed before her death (un-related)and she used to always joke about her mammograms. I think your reply was a little over the top.
I didn't want to sound like a bitch but I feel the sme way. After spending the better part of 4 months going thru radiation therapy, I never really find any humor in mammograms or the therapy that goes along with finding you have cancer.
I know Mara was trying to keep a humor check on all of us. Sometimes the board gets way too serious, but I opened her post and cringed. Mara is a sweet girl and I enjoy her posts very much, so please forgive me if this sounds a bit harsh. But for the women out there, who like me, have been thru the ringer from the moment our doctor says "malignant" to the day we take a cab home from our last treatment this is not a laughing matter. Trust me, when you sit for a couple of months waiting on your checkup and pray for that clean bill of health, you find very little humor in jokes that pertain to any of it.
Mara, I know you meant no harm, but you might want to think about it a little before you post next time on a topic such as this.
xoxoxox
Lass...another survivor
-- Modified on 3/6/2003 3:39:22 PM
The human condition is filled with trials, at least one of which we are certain not to survive. Many choose to see this frailty as a serious matter, and I find no fault with that. Others choose to laugh about it now, while we still can, and I find no fault with that either.
Also, I think you have to account for the fact that the joke was about the angst of mammograms, not about the angst of breast cancer. There's a certain amount of political incorrectness that comes from joking about the trials of others, but she is not. She is joking about her own experience.
In my mind, one's own experiences are never off limits.
Hi Lass,
I hear ya, don't you just hate the f***King waiting and all the happy little smiles & comments you get from the Doctors and techs.
xoxo, Lizzie
Lost both of my folks to cancer in the last five years so I don't really find much humor in the post. Any way you look at it, cancer's a real bitch!
By the way, I have a fabulous sense of humor and can laugh at just about anything, but sometimes things just hit too close to home. peace
Or I'll start thinking of you as Bitchlizzie.
Dude,
Did I call anybody other than Stern a nasty name?
xoxo, Lizzie
-- Modified on 3/6/2003 5:05:09 PM
I'm with you, Lizzie
you should have included several other posters as well as Mara. Very simply put, many contributors on this board have taste up their ass(please pardon my language) and display either very little or no common sense. But this board is just a microcosm of the rest of the world. There are so many tasteless people all over, who often think that they are just being funny or cute, when in reality it's kinda pathetic. Don't want to make you into a jaded soul, but there has always been people like this and there always will be. I tend to totally ignore those who I think are classless, rather than get upset.
As far as linking web sites, that appears to be pretty much the norm around here. It isn't just one person that does it, but numerous individuals. Again, I don't let it bother me. Anybody who is in business for themselves makes a conscious decision how to best market their product and advertise. Some people feel the need to sell, sell, sell at any given opportunity. Others do it with far greater subtlety. I feel that any lady the markets and advertises herself regularly(ooops,I mean those who post with regularity) lacks a certain amount of discretion. If this is what they think is the proper way to conduct business, I am certainly not in any position to tell them otherwise. However, I can assure you from my personal viewpoint, I would never consider seeing any lady who takes this type of marketing approach, no matter how many stellar reviews they have. I much prefer ladies who are far more discreet and low profile.
Not stating how they world should be, just how I conduct myself.
I really didn’t mean to name Mara or anyone else for posting just for the sake of putting their link on the boards. I know there’s many who do it. It just happen to be her post that rubbed me the wrong way.
No, this will not turn me into a jaded soul. There’s good and bad in all walks of life. Sometimes I get a bug up my ass about things that hit very close to home. Perhaps I should have Puck get it out.....lol
xoxo, Lizzie
I would be happy to help with any obstructions. And I make house calls.
there is very little humor that is not based on something very serious. it has to be; knock-knock jokes lose their appeal not long after kindergarten.
bob crane took a look at the lighter side of concentration camps, for chrissake, and hogan's heroes ran for years; ditto alan alda who thought the whole korean war was a scream. did you ever laugh at a blonde joke, a polish joke, a lesbian joke? does that make you a bad person, and does it mean that you believe that all "pollacks" are dumb, all blondes are easy, or all lesbians become girls' gym teachers? (ok, bad example 
it isn't always funny when it hits close to home. and of course there isn't anything funny about breast cancer - but there IS humor in the absurdity of the discomfort and mental anguish that go hand in hand with a breast exam.
we whistle in the dark to fool the boogeyman into thinking that we are not afraid.
Yes, I hear what you’re saying. It is hitting very close to home and I’m sure Mara didn’t mean any harm. I’m more up set that she posted her web site link and no links to some useful information about mammography for the ladies.
To ME it came across as just another way to promote her site but that’s just my opinion
xoxo, Lizzie
God you guys...Give it a rest..!!!People that seem to feed on NEGATIVITY are everywhere. They come out to feed like jackle when someone is down...Mara,your post brought a smile to my face, as I remembered my beautiful Mother going through the tests during her battle with cancer and the sense of humor she had..(She let the nurses and lab people sign her shaved head like a cast & used a pirates patch over her lazy eye, after her stroke & yelled"who goes there"??? When anyone knocked at her door.)It's all about "perception" The glass is 1/2 empty or 1/2 full. As far as self promotion, well I've been called the queen, so I should know..LOL Of course, other petite and perky, Providers warrrent 30 reply threads,using the same topic, or variations of the same topic, over and over and over again...just to gleen the compliments and promotion, and "Play" the "Horndogs" and they love it & eat it with a spoon...!! Gag.... So don't let these preachers of "doom & gloom" bring you down...just consider the source...I used to enjoy posting, thinking I could make a difference....Truth is, this is a fickled bunch, so don't try to fight hormones and PMS...Life is much to short...Hugs to you cutie...so SMILE....Robyn
Lizzie: "another way to promote her website" ???
I just took a peek at Mara's posting history. It looks like about 80+% of the time, she includes her link in her posts.
But check this out...
In the past 2 years, Mara has initiated 2 threads. I'm not sure how this can "spun" into some kind of overuse of the board to promote her link. There are providers on this board that initiate more threads per week, many months running, than Mara has in a lifetime.
I get frustrated by these kinds of accusations that are made even when their falseness is so obviously available. It took me all of 30 seconds to gather the factual data, less time than it took to type the accusation. It makes me assume there are other motives for the accusation.
-- Modified on 3/6/2003 8:46:33 PM
“It makes me assume there are other motives for the accusation”
Oh please, I’m not a provider, I don’t know Mara and there’s no big dark secret motive. I’ve been a member of TER for several years and if you do a search on my posting history, you can see I’ve supported the women in the biz and still do.
Like I have stated several times, it hit really close to home but I’m not getting into my health issues with you.
xoxo, Lizzie
I didn't ask you about your health issues, or about whether you're a provider. Don't know, don't want to know, got my own problems. But your reply only reinforces my point.
My point is that there are many providers that post heavily to promote their links. You picked one who CLEARLY does not, and singled her out. The primary bone you pick in your first two posts was that she was a "link monger", and the argument that the joke hit too close too home was clearly secondary.
I just get frustrated with this tactic that is always used to villify someone, it is done all the time on the board, in politics, by the press, etc.:
-I want to criticize someone about issue "A"
-I know they're not guilty of "A", but I want to nail them anyway. Their innocence is so easily verifiable by others that my criticism will reflect poorly on me
-So I'll attach my emotionally powerful issue "B" on to the back of my argument
-This gives me the moral high ground to pursue argument "A", while issue "B" defends me, by making people who stand up to criticism "A" look heartless and insensitive to my having issue "B"
This method of using legitimate human suffering as a way to make illegitimate accusation's about a person's intent is always inappropriate, and yet people tolerate it as if it's OK. It's not OK, it's never been OK, it probably won't be OK in the future. The fact remains that you've simply added deeply emotional fuel to a fire that never should have been started, that fire being that Mara is a link monger. It's not true, and it's easily verifiable that it's not true.
But I just wanted to tell you that I like your handle. I'm wondering if you serve or have served with those who live by that motto? These are people who I admire very much, including my son.
Yes, thank you for noticing, and thank you to your son for serving all of us as well.
He comes from a family that understands this responsibility:
My Grandfather US Marines 1916-1919 Belleau Wood
My Father US Army 1942-45 New Guinea, Phillipines(Medic)
Me US Army 1965-72 Vietnam 2 tours (Airborne Ranger)
My Older Son US Army 1988-95 Gulf War (Armored Cavalry)
My Younger Son US Army 1998-Presently Serving (Special Forces)
Not to mention scores of uncles, cousins, and 2 aunts that were nurses in Europe in WW2. I personally believe that this country would be a better place if universal service were adopted as policy.
...here's one the little one brought home the other day:
Why did the elephant paint his toenails all different colors?
So he could hide in the gumball machine!
No offense intended, standard disclaimers where applicable, excludes the states of Alaska, Hawaii, Puerto Rico, void in Canada and Mexico.
Shameless self promotion:
BJ, Palm Beach
[email protected]
-- Modified on 3/6/2003 5:51:33 PM
Ever you ever seen an elephant hide in a gumball machine?
Hide pretty well, don't they.
I'm a guy, but I think what Mara posted is.....It's not a fun thing getting a mammogram.
My intentions were not to ofend anybody, I am truly sorry for making you all so upset and causing negative post on this board.
I would like to hit a few points:
1- I always put my link review when I write something......I did not know that it was taboo and that it was considered taking advantage of this site. I have been in the buisness 2 years and it is the first I hear about it. For this information I thank you. However I would appriciate more information on why I would not put my link to my reviews with my opinions? If I like what someone says I alway look them up to put a face w/name and so on. All the guys have all their reviews automatically show up when they post why is that not looked upon as bad?
2-The joke was about an exam and not about cancer. Why would I joke about that when my father died 4 years ago of cancer, my grandmother died of breast cancer, 2 aunts currently in treatment, my little sister will probably need to make a choice by Monday on weather she keeps her unborn child or has surgery because of cancer. Cancer is not prejudice, it hits all ages, races, and economic leverl it can happen to anyone of us.
3- For those of you who know me, know that I am not a fighter , I am in this biz because I love it and would not trade it.
I am hoping that this response is acceptable to all of you, I would never want the power to be able to upset anyone especially all of you who I enjoy chatting and exchanging opinions with.
Mara of San Diego
Well, I thought it was hilarious... You brightened one girl's day... and it needed brightening.. thanks, girl!!!
Jaclyn
It was a joke. I remember reading Heinlein's 'Stranger in a Strange Land' wherein the main character, raised on Mars, is unable to comprehend humor. It is explained that all humor (or damn near all of it) involves pain or misfortune. Think about it - is there a joke that isn't at someone's expense, that doesn't involve pain, discomfort or embarassment for some group or individual? Laughter is a human response to the painful or unexpected. I liked it better when we were all fair game, one of the reasons I like Howard is that he makes fun of everybody, not excluding himself. If you hear 10 jokes that strike you as funny and the 11th is at your expense, suck it up and quit whining. We're all funny to someone. That was the point of my comment to Lizzie about the male-bashing joke - that one was funny, but the other was intolerable. To you, maybe, but I have a different take. Is yours more valid than mine, or mine more valid than yours? I don't think so.
NOT CANCER. NOT PEOPLE DYING.
Did you guys READ the joke? Let's all remember that getting a mammogram is intended as screening for cancer but the majority of people who get mammograms do NOT have cancer. It is part of the normal yearly screening for women over 40 or women in high risk groups.
Saying this joke was making fun of cancer victims makes about as much sense as saying a joke about x-rays is making fun of lung cancer victims. Or a joke about the "fun" involved in getting a pap smear is making fun of people who suffer from cervical cancer. Mammograms, lung x-rays and pap smears are procedures and not diagnoses.
I am surprised so many people were offended by this. This seems a sort of lighthearted board in general. Then again, I'm a nurse so I hear a lot of medical humor that makes this sort of thing pale in comparison.
MM
i am an infrequent poster (here even more so than on my home SD board). but, i follow them both pretty regularly.
First, in support of Mara:
i have never ever even remotely gotten the impression or feeling that Mara ever posts gratuitously simply to get her link out there. her posts are insightful, sometimes playful, but always pointed.
And, in support of Lizzie:
i think Lizzie has every reason to be offended by Mara's post (even though that was not the intent). but, instead of attacking Mara, it may have been much more productive to mention that there is a very real and painful other side to mammograms, and to include your links so we can all be better informed.
Mara, thank you for your attempts to lighten the atmosphere.
Lizzie, thank you for making us all aware that there is another side and providing us the means to enlighten ourselves.
now... can't we all just get along?
I am an infrequent poster but enjoy reading this discussion board daily. I actually wish more providers would provide a link to their website. It just gives me an opportunity to know a little more about the person. My .02.
Bull32
OMG, this is relly something. Mara posts something with intended humor about mamograms. So it isn't funny to some of you ladies. I think the equivilant might me a gent poking fun at the prostate exam. Both are uncomfortable (I guess, can't say I could compare) both are for cancer detection and both have jokes to be told.
B..Lizzie has spoken volumes here. She has more to say than has being written. Nothing was said by Mara intending humor about cancer and the issue of using the post as a tool for promotion is IMHO a real stretch. Those of us who read this board with any regularity know Mara to not be like that. Lizzie, you have downed yourself more than your attempt to down Mara. And I do think that your post was intended to do harm and not to inform. Perhaps you would like to share with us just what is really going on in your head.
Lass, I was relieved to read your post above.
I might mention here that humor is used as a treatment modality for cancer patients and one fine lady who didn't survive the disease had a great deal to do with setting up a laugh therapy outlet for those in the battle. I'll always remember Gilda for that.