I kind of stumbled into the opportunity to have a session with a new mom who is lactating.

It's not my cup of tea but it's certainly not idiotic. If it's what turns you on so go for it and have fun!

Get your mouth in position first so you don't squirt it in your eye.

If it seems hot to you, you’ll probably enjoy it. If it turns out to be a cool fantasy that falls flat IRL, then you don’t have to do it again.  

I just had this opportunity a few weeks ago.  It was flavorless.

That’s surprising to me. As I said above, I had a very different experience. Was delicious.  

As a Mother who breastfed it’s best to be kind, caring, gentle & respectful. Remember she has emotions raging at this time. Be appreciative. Tell her she’s beautiful because she probably does not feel pretty at this time in her life. Creating a life is phenomenal, but the body is never the same. Most of all have fun exploring this new erotic adventure together.

Oh my, I was fascinated with my boobies when I was lactating.  
You guys got to have all the fun, learning to aim by peeing on Cheerios in the toilet bowl, writing your names in the snow, lol!  I recall laying in the bath, squeezing my nipple and watching how far the milk could shoot into the air!  It went pretty far, and it was quite amusing.

Okay, that was sweet and also a hot af mental image.

I told her either I wasn't getting any or it was flavorless. She squeezed her nipple to shoot some out to show me.  I tried it again with the same non-taste result.  It's possible none came out for me.  

Pun intended.  

I didn't read the label, but maybe ...

I am not being judgemental, but I am lactose intolerant!

are not usually considered to be the same thing.  If a woman has REALLY saggy nipples that resemble a cow's udders, and uses them PRIMARILY for dispensing milk, then I agree that teats may be the correct term.  

A teat's a treat, etc.

I have total recall of a lady, last fall, famous as “Ms. Triple nipple”. She used her middle nipple to tickle my pickle ‘till the pleasure through my body did ripple and the orgasm left me a cripple. I still tipped her a Grant and a nickel!

Tickle

And he suggests Fester stays far away from trying to write any.

Nipples are charmin says Mr. Whipple.

causes nary a ripple, while pimple popping can ruin your shopping.