As some of you may recall, sometime ago I posted a question regarding how to pass a providors screening requirements while I am disabled, and not working. Many of you, Providors and Hobbyists alike were forthcoming with a lot of constructive feedback, and I thank you again. Since we last spoke  I have had to have a Traech tube surgically implanted into my throat.

I am recovering quite well. I asked my Physician if I should limit any type of activities. She said not to return to work. However, She said there was no restriction regarding any type of adult recreational activity.

Consequently, I pose the following hypothetical situation:

Ladies presuming a client satisfied your individual screening requirements would you expect the client to disclose a similar condition beforehand? Recognizing you have the same right as any other business to reserve the right to refuse service to anyone. Would something like this concern you enough to decline, or is this of no consequence?

I believe in treating others the way I want to be treated(some reading this might disagree, but it is true), and since I hold all of you ladies in the highest regard, I felt that it would be rude at best if a client arrived at your apartment, or if you arrived at the clients, home, office, or hotel and possibly be put on the spot when confronted by something like this or similar. If for no other reason common sense and common courtesy demands that this issue be discussed.

Ladies, once again, I thank you for your courtesy, and I am anxious to hear your feedback.

Respectfully.

Cliff.

Hiya, Cliff--

I have no problem seeing clients with disabilities, provided that they are clean, kind, well-mannered, and pass my screening.  I have a lot of experience with people with all sorts of disabilities and it doesn't faze me at all.  However, I do believe that I would like to know beforehand so that I am not taken aback; knowing beforehand would alleviate awkwardness for us both.  I would also like to know about any special considerations (e.g., how do you communicate?)that I would need to take into account, so that we don't waste time or lessen the mood by discussing them.

I wish you the best, and may your encounters always be pleasing.
Love,
Anne

-- Modified on 5/31/2003 5:36:22 PM

For obvious reasons.  Example I had a client set up an appointment giving a referenced providers name to check him out.  SHe did not respond so I set up the appointment anyway.  It turned out that the reason he wanted me to get in contact was so she could tell me of his problem instead of disclosing it himself.  He had a colostomy bag on and I had to ask him to take his money back because it really freaked me out.  Come on guys a little common sense please would save us all a lot of heartache and embarassment.  That's not to say all disabilities are handled the same I also had a client ask me if I minded if he took of his leg.  He was extremely attractive and I felt it would not inhibit my sensuality in anyway and that I would not be freaked so I let him stay.  Hypocritical maybe but then again some us are not that good actresses so in order to provide excellent service across the board these things are subjective.  Just my humble opinion

Like Anne, I'm also comfortable seeing disabled clients, all other things being equal -- he is a mature gentleman of the sort I like to see.  I also would prefer to know about a disability in advance.  I find that it allows me to be properly prepared (mentally, as well as to have made any accommodations necessary in advance), and that it makes the client more comfortable (because he knows I'm prepared).  

Good luck to you, and don't let it slow you down any more than absolutely necessary!

Abby

Cliff, I am so in sync with your problems, as I am a cancer survivor of seven years who once was given oless than seven hours to live, but at least enough morphine to die in peace dreaming about bbjteows. Suddenly, the chemo worked, and the cancer died quickly, leaving me like a 90 lb Biafran infant, but I survived and returned to 190 6'2".
Your situation is much more difficult and surely painful both physically and mentally.
I survived to research and write at the laptop and to travel, going now on more than seven years. March 2, 1996 was death day, but it passed.
I have no wisdom, but can only encourage you to mix pleasure and the leaving of a memorable legacy in your final months and hopefully years.
Concentrate on doing what is important and enjoyable to you, so that when you pass, as we all do, you can say to yourself that you lived a worthy life, no more silly than necessary.
Get some great bbjs. That helps me and spurs my research and writing, although I often feel drained. Drink lots of  Mountain Dew.

I would feel like most providers wouldn't have a problem as long as they new in advance.  There are a aselect few that would probably say no but I wouldnt take it to heart as Im sure you know...everyone has their preferences some only see certain racese some only see women, some only see men so on and so forth.  I would think the mainly problem that would make a provider uncomfortable with you is the thought that they might offend you in some way or hurt you.  On that note, if you let her know in advance and you guys talk about tthose worries there should be no reason why you two wont have a good time.

Hey Sweetie, I'm sorry to hear about this new development with your health...Can you tell us a little more about what triggered the need for the trech...?? As far as your question, I think you should mention your condition either in your first email contact, or phone call with the Provider you've chosen...Not however. for the reasons you think, but since I would think it best to find out the ones who are totally there for your service, or those who are strictly out for themselves...then avoid the latter. You have a situation, that calls for some TLC and giving, caring GFE....Don't set yourself up for disappointment by not explaining everything up front...Good Luck, Hun....Hugs, Robyn

Yes, I would say it's absolutely necessary for you to be completely forthcoming about your condition...or any disabled gentleman to be just as forthcoming. Not so that we can say no... but so that we can be prepared to deal with whatever special needs you may have... even if it's something so simple as "don't bump this tube!"  I think more than anything, most of us would be concerned about not causing you harm. It could be very jarring to be unprepared for something like that and have it as a "surprise."  So my answer is YES... please be forthcoming and don't be scared to tell me exactly what you need from me

Hugs*
Nicole

I had a client once who did not tell me he was in a wheel chair. (I have nothing against someone disabled.) But, the did make me feel awkward. Since this was an overnight session, he needed help for everything. I didn't think this was fair to me because he did not tell me.
He told me he didn't tell me so I wouldn't treat him different.
Again, it wasn't fair to me, actually it pissed me off. Not only was a supposed to be a whore in bed, I had to be his nurse maid too.

Shaye