I don't post much to this board, so I hope you'll indulge me. You may be totally disinterested if you've never questioned your own hobby life. Here goes

Well, I may have hit a turning point in my hobbying life. After 5 or 6 years of involvement, keeping it to the occasional business trip, never hobbying in my home state or town, making about 3 to 5 hobby dates in a year, I may have had a pivotal experience.

I say “may” because I’m not sure what will change if anything. I haven’t had time to “process” it. But I thought maybe writing about it would help, and posting it here might elicit support, constructive help, or even humor (i.e. perspective).

So as the very few of you who know me are aware, I only hobby when traveling, which is why my reviews are from places like L.A., NYC, Toronto, etc, though I live in New England.  I had an unusual opportunity to travel to a couple of major hobbying towns that I have never traveled to, and so with much excited anticipation I did the research and booked appointments with well-reviewed ladies who struck my fancy.

In the first town, I had scored big time. I had a wonderful time with a stunning GFE at an amazingly reasonable rate. She was gorgeous, cute, killer body, fun, smart, sexy, generous, nurturing…perfect in many ways. (Review will come in July some time. I’m not naming names here for a reason).

In the second town, I was first challenged by sheer abundance; every time I turned around another beautiful young provider was walking up to me and offering herself. Being strictly a TER-book-it-over-the-Internet guy, it was a whole new experience. I was not prepared for it and at first just looked for cover. I had a date planned, after all, and only so much money. Plus, I didn’t have much trust in what the experience would be like. I am a careful hobbyist. You know the type…I never book from CL, only see well-reviewed ladies, plan way in advance (much to some ladies’ chagrin)…I play it pretty safe as far as the hobby goes.

So the date I had booked happens and it’s only okay. She’s not as beautiful as I had hoped, we didn’t really click, maybe…she is a real nice young lady and did her job and I enjoyed her but…I was not left feeling really satisfied. I think it’s fair to say that, since I had not had sex for three or four months, I was sex-starved and anything less than a spectacular time wasn’t gonna cut it.

So she leaves, I get dressed, go down to the hotel bar, where I allow myself to be picked up by another provider. She’s super hot for a 40 year old…killer body, she’s nice to me, fawns over me, suckers me into taking her upstairs. Turns out she won’t kiss, and has a few other little rules that annoy me. With my tongue deep in her pussy she pulls out some coke in a tube of sorts and snorts it, saying it helps her get off. I’ve already cum this evening, so I’m not cumming soon enough for her, and there’s lots of “Cum for me baby.” I don’t know about you, but that kills it for me. I was done. She explains she was getting sore from the condom, can’t use lube for some reason I can’t recall, and explains that my drinking must have caused the problem (taking too long).

Then she lets me know she has a terminal lung cancer, and the cocaine numbs the pain. So I’ve been fucking a coked-out 40 year old with terminal cancer.

I had jumped into bed with two escorts in the same night, partially because I said to myself, “come on, be a little spontaneous…just go with it.” I ended up in an upsetting situation because I was insatiable and did not control my urges.

Now I am wondering if I really have a problem.

Comments? Do you ever feel this way? No PMs please...my VIP has lapsed.




-- Modified on 6/22/2006 7:35:03 PM

-- Modified on 6/22/2006 7:37:39 PM