I have been scanning the boards. I see that some people define Adultery as sexual relations where the lady is Married (old definition). It is ok for a Married man to see a woman outside of marriage as long she is not married (I.E see providers).

Other definitions more modern times is is defined as sexual relations where either a man is married or a woman is married. (Modern definition).

What year did the meaning go the modern definition ?

some are and are open about it. others are and are secretive about it.

You are correct a few years ago I saw a provider who said "This is so wrong before the session started". I found out the next day she had a nervous breakdown, she was filling guilty because of her marriage.

Huh? A man having sex outside of his marriage is not adultery? Where the hell did you get that idea? Do you still believe that a woman is considered the property of her father until she marries and then becomes the property of her husband too?? This is 2009, not 1809. Wake up there Rip Van Winkle.

but several of the providers i have seen in the DC area are quite married and fully functional as providers.

one not having any signs of a nervous breakdown is quite open about it and wears her wedding ring during sessions. another who seems more unstable to me treats it as a secret.

i want to, in all kindness, refute your assumption that guilt must necessarily involved.

I already can tell that you did. just don't tell me. lol

I don't know why I am laughing because it really isn't funny. I would hope that in my 2000+ sexual encounters that they were all consenual. Yes I know that at least some of them probably were of the sort that you refer to. Just allow me to delude myself.

I have seen all types of variations of this theme. It is usually from those providers who group in the church. One actually told me she was spiritual and wanted to get into a discussion about sin before the fun started, lol. I thought I was talking to someone who was daemon possessed.

Another one told me that she had become a provider because her church would not help her when she lost her job. Trying to throw out the guilt stuff.

There was another one from your neck of the woods Atlanta that told me "Lord hand mercy, I did not mean to sleep and miss the appointment". I saw her later on and had a good time. A few years later she confided in me that she was married, lol.

There was another one who told me she had 3 kids from her marriage. She went to one those Holy roller churches. She split from her husband because he gave her stds a few times. After she became a provider she never caught an std again. She is on the run because she owes 1000's in back child support.

)Do you still believe that a woman is considered )the property of her father until she marries and )then becomes the property of her husband too??
No.

I would not be seeing providers if I thought they were property lol. I just asked the question.

I have always thought from day one is Adultery was sex outside of marriage if one of the partners was married regardless of their sex.

I asked the question because someone had another definition for it.

Adultery occurs when a married person engages in sexual behavior with a person to whom he/she is not married without the knowledge and consent of his/her spouse. (Between 15 and 28% of marriages allow for some hanky panky for a variety of reasons; just FYI.)

This is fairly unambiguous.

If you are Christian, and you look up adultery in the Gospel of John, you will ALSO find that having sexual relations with ANYONE after you are divorced is ALSO adultery. (Really! Jesus said so explicitly.)

Naturally, I have a slightly different take on things.

A promise of monogamy is not a promise of chastity. My spouse is a wise woman and realized this and gave me explicit permission (subject to some conditions, covenants and restrictions) to see other women for sex so long as there was no risk of alienation of affection, it isn't thrown in her face, our home isn't used for the activity, I use condoms, and -- when she is ready to resume her proper place -- I discontinue such activity.

Am I committing adultery?  According to the Catholic Church, yes. But I'm an Odinist so I don't care what the Catholic Church says.

Use of escort services is by far the best method for keeping both the letter and spirit of my wife's conditions and restrictions. No escort is going to try to sweep me off my feet and take me away from my wife -- the same can't be said for some lady at the office.

Only married (or in committed relationship) can committ adultery.

So if I, a single person not in a relationship, has sex with a married person, then **I** am not committing adultery.  Only the married person is.

What the hell are you talking about?  If you fuck someone that you are not married to that's adultery.  Nothing has changed.

you are planning to make an argument to St. Peter. If so, save the time and just ask for forgiveness. If it's a matter of feeling guilty, why do you feel so. If you have a wife or SO, the legal definition of adultery isn't going to change anything. The guilt is from knowing you cheated on her.

Sorry about the horrible experience you had with the married provider. I can imagine that has something to do with your question.