So here's the thing...  

(Providers who can help, and how...?)

Long street short, it's been pointed out to me by many individuals that I miss many socio-sexual cues, and when I do notice them I don't know how to flow inside the interaction. This especially pertains to meeting new women. I DO get laid, but maybe not as often as I'd like. I get by on my looks, conversational ability, and general sweetness I guess. I'm not autistic. I don't have Aspergers. I'm a regular and otherwise successful guy, age 40. I just never learned the "language of sex" early on.

In the bedroom, in civie life, I'm an intense lovemaker. No problem in that department. Past partners all love me. BUT, when it comes to switching positions and being wild, I don't know how to use non-verbal cues. Something as simple as doggie style: I can verbally say (in a sexy way), "Let's switch positions." Or, for example, "Let's roll over so you're on top." However, there IS a non-verbal way to do it. THAT is what I want to learn (or get better at), the non-verbal stuff.

I am a hobbyist. I figure, the right provider could probably help me out a lot. But, how do I find the right provider? ("Excuse me, can you teach non-verbal cues?") What kind of meeting do we set up? A role play? I'm a whitelisted guy in the Boston metro, FYI.

See you in person so that I can properly diagnose you..lol  
Just gotta find someone you click with. There's always some awkwardness in being with someone new. Ooooo maybe you should try with a submissive! You can tell her what to do and it'll turn her on; no need for you to be quiet!

Haha...best answer ever!! :

Sex is better with communication. I'd much rather hear my lover say "Mmm...I want to fuck you from behind", or "Ride me baby!" than him trying to use "non-verbal cues" to get the message across.  

Hearing a partner verbalize what they want is HOT!  

Many people don't verbalize ENOUGH during sex. Often they try to get BETTER at verbalizing. Why are you moving in the opposite direction? I've never heard of someone trying to communicate less during sex

This has nothing to do with guns but damn Meena! You are so sexy! 😍

I failed to see why it would be weird/embarrassing to communicate verbally. Just like the previous poster Meena said, there's nothing wrong with it. You can try to say it as politely as possible or make light of it in a funny charming way.

OTH I myself have reached the stage of non-verbal cue with my regular. It's because we've been following pretty much the same script for so long she automatically knows what come next! You too can eventually reach this stage by doing the same thing.

I've always been able to talk to anyone, anywhere, at any time, unless I'm interested in a woman and then I stumble like an idiot.  

My ex, and GF's of my past had to pretty much tell me when they wanted to get laid. In fact my college GF used to giggle at me, and tell me "this means I want to fuck".

A few of the usual suspects in here have suggested that I have Aspergers. I'm not crazy, my Mother had me tested (LOL Big Bang Theory reference). Unlike you, I have no chance if I must get by on my looks. Conversational ability, and general sweetness, maybe so but looks, no.

I will admit that since I started this wonderful part of my life, I'm much more confident and poised. Simply because I know I'm going to get laid, and how I want to get laid and by women that I'd have no chance with IRL. So now, when women that I'd have a chance with show me that kind of attention, I can brush it off and it seems to get them even more intrigued. It's kind of funny, how the dynamic has changed.

Russ, hugs buddy. I get you. Yeah, I used to play in a band and model, so I have fallen into situations dumbly. But...those non-verbal cues: I TOTALLY get what you're talking about. I know a prominent sexologist here in Boston. He points out to me that sex is still a massive taboo, therefore we as societies have a coded language around it. Like any other language, you need to learn it early in life.

And, hey, good for you! You know yourself, you've found what works for you. You seem self-assured. You're a role model. Rock on

END OF MESSAGE

...she knew I was new to the scene and walked me through almost the whole process...we've reached the point now where we can read eachother very well, and most of what I learned from her has been very useful with other girls...

She has me listed as "The jelloman Project" in her phone...

Being a parent of a son who has Autism, not a real fan of your use of the term.  I get where you are going in using it.....but you might want to think twice about others on this board before disenfranchising the disabled. I consider your use in your post the same as calling someone or something retarded.

We all think it will not happen to us, having a child with Autism.  But the stats are alarming.

No, I am not going to question your right to say what you want because I am a strong supporter of Free Speech.  I hate how the left has put a stranglehold on debate and difference of opinion by playing the victim.    

Neither myself or my son are "Victims" in the context of this post.  Just suggesting you might want to reconsider the use of the term.

In the end, you have your opinion and I have mine, and we most likely will not agree.....which is OK.

I totally respect that. I intended nothing pejorative. I'm not like that. Sorry.