To people like me.  

Gigi Engle wrote from the POV of the less sensitive partner in the pair bond. That you referred to an emotionally rough relationship, I'll infer that you are the one who was "sensitive" (I really don't like this use of that word), and the article grabbed your attention because your less...can we say demonstrative partner? moved on because s/he couldn't deal with the ebbs and tides of your emotional life.

I come up as having some characteristics of the less sensitive partner with respect to my wife; but in my "arrangement"/pseudo-relationship with a provider,  I'm probably the more sensitive one.

I don't know--maybe not so much of a surprise, huh?

This article reminds me of a truism I've encountered in my travels, which was summarized very nicely by that same provider/friend of mine:

"In every relationship, there is a lover, and a 'loved'".

So true....

Very good breakdown! You convinced me. You're probably right, and the BF ends up leaving because he can't tear down the wall between them and express himself fully and honestly emotionally. So...towards the end, they "realize" that they don't know each other because neither can let him-herself be known.

Like most articles, it points out data and never solutions.

I know you are not really asking for all of this advice but anyway.  
Put yourself back together, try not to self destruct. Work on your long shot, what does it look like at 5oo meters? Maybe set some ground rules for next time. You will find someone if that is what you want, somewhere they are looking for you.  That is not meant to be mushy, just what I have observed in my few years.

and I bet there is a hell of a lot more ways to do this than these 15.

That said, I can see myself in at least half of those scenarios.  I am very averse to confrontation.  (I married a woman of Irish and Scotch ancestry - how crazy is that?)

I think part of the answer can be found in a scene from David Lean's classic movie, Lawrence of Arabia.  In one scene, Lawrence (Peter O'Toole as his finest.) shows a fellow officer how he can hold his hand over a candle flame for several seconds.  "What's the trick?", inquired the officer.  "The trick..." rejoined Lawrence, "...is not to mind it."

Good advice, use it.

Have you read Shakespeare's Sonnets? It is about this.  

Love is not real, nor does it exist. Love is a feeling(a emotional state) based on a physical reaction, what your body is telling your brain(a chemical reaction).  

Emotions are simply overwhelming to me (even though I believe mine are the same as what others experience) and I stay away from them because of it...  

I completely disagree, a person can experience an emotional state. The emotion itself is nonexistence. Proving that emotion exists is as futile as proving god exists.

Z
You're dead on for the most part about the situation.  

None of that crap!!!!!

That would be the emotional one in your article. Unfortunately when you are like I am, you live and breathe showing your partner how much they mean to you through words and actions. When those are not reciprocated it's like your partner has the last glass of water on earth and you only wish they would give you a sip, just once in awhile.

Post a pic of your best group if you can. Have fun and stay warm and safe.

description of someone 'high maintenance'.  

You are just fine. It's up to both partners to appreciate one another AS THEY ARE. The idea of changing someone to be what you want is wishful thinking. People change, but on their own and based upon who they are... not the way someone "pushes" them to change.

Some people just aren't the right fit.
Sure you can analyze these things, and hopefully learn from experiences - but if you are just TOO different and the frustration is greater than the plusses - then why continue on?  Find someone who is a better fit, don't try to change someone.  Secure people will realize this more quickly, and not want to waste their time or that of the other.
(and this is general comment - more directed at the article than the OP and her situation, which I know nothing about)

And involves commitment and some sacrifice, and actually giving a shit about the other person, as a real person, warts and all.

I think one of the hardest things about being in an emotionally mismatched relationship is that some other parts of it are so good that we're drawn to hanging in there and trying to make it work, even though we know, or should know, or don't want to know, that it's time move on.

I have had an On/off relationship with a woman for several years now, during which time she has had several other relationships. She came out and spent a few days with me last week and in the course of conversation she confessed to me that the reason we always seem to find our way back to each other is that I never "kiss her ass" or get all needy and clingy.

Don't get me wrong, I don't thing any of us are immune to "falling in love" and I will freely admit that I have been the one "more in love" at various times in my life, but like you, most of the time at least, I am the "less emotional" on in the relationship. To tell the truth, I like it that way, and I think for a guy it's the only way you can survive dating hookers. Needy, clingy guys who date hookers usually end up get chewed up and spit out, I never want to be one of those guys making "I've fallen for a hooker and can't get up" type OPs. lol

The hardest part are those things that do work are often magical and mask the hard work that must be done in a relationship.

What a gentle soul that man is.

1. I'm the less emotional party. Always have been, always will be. Very few people have ever been able to ignite a sense of desire/need in me. My relationships are based on sexual and intellectual compatibility and how you respond to my vulgar and over the line jokes.  

Commitment and sacrifice can take place in a relationship where there is no emotional investment.

It's worth a shot

But you attempted to refute the existence of love by merely dismissing it as an emotion.  Again, it is much more than that.  But I am EQUALLY convinced that if you don't think so, no discussion on this board will ever convince you otherwise.  So I'm perfectly fine with agreeing to strongly disagree with you, and leave it at that.

If he did all those things then I would suspect he loved you very much and will find it difficult to move on despite, as you said that inevitably people can crush your being with words or lack of actions.

Swallow that lump!

why bother.  

On all accounts.

Aria,  
What is a sense of desire or need for you nowadays? I mean I'm sure it's changed as you've matured, but do you really know what will make you or allow you to feel desire again?  If you can't obtain that feeling with anyone, unfortunately, you're setting yourself up to be a lonely person.
Personally, I'm 43 yrs old and still stuck in a 16yr marriage with someone that I have no desire to be with.  For me desire is wanting to come home and find out how your day was. I want to ask your opinion and advice on issues that concern me or us and about what's going on in the world.  I want to value your opinion, I want to look forward to seeing you, hearing from you, laughing with you and holding you. I just want to value our time together and actually look forward to spending time with you.  I want to feel wanted and appreciated and respected and with all of those things, passion and DESIRE will develop and grow.  
If you can't allow those things to develop with someone then it's going to be a depressing and empty feeling inside and you'll never be truly happy.  
Unfortunately,  I have none of those things these days so that's why I'm here in the P4P world.  I know it doesn't come close to what I described above, but it gives me something to look forward to and gives me something to have a desire  for.  Nowadays for me, I desire to try and connect and have a killer GFE session with a witty, smart, beautiful, sexy, and erotic woman. That desire is far and away different from the desire I wish I had in my real life.

The emotional person they described fits me to a T lol...except I'm worse lol

Fred (the gentleman in the video) is a better man than I'll ever be. It warms my soul when I see people like that. We should all know ourselves, and I know I don't have the capacity to love someone like that, but doesn't mean that I don't admire those that do.

There isn't anything wrong with the people we are, in fact, we are to be appreciated for recognizing that and understanding our limitations. There are members of my family that are leaning on me to date (they say try match or eharmony) because they can't imagine how I can be happy being alone (mostly because they would be terrified to be alone). Of course they have no idea I'm playing our sport, and I'm getting my intimacy and sexual release in this sport. All they see is me being alone, ya gotta love them for their compassion.

Sacramento must be a warm place, because you are hot. Yummy, yum, yum