You are right: you as a provider have to make a determination as to what the hobbyist are looking for, you have to sense what he likes. For me, I do usually play the "vanilla GFE" role, but I am looking for a response from the provider. She has to "show me, and wow me", meaning: she has to take the initiative to move beyond the vanilla GFE. I can get the vanilla GFE from most providers. But, what makes a provider stand out, what is it that she does that I will remember. I want to leave the experience thinking, damn, that was filthy as hell, I gonna come back and fuck that some more.
Sure, it can take 2 or 3 dates for this side to come out: a comfort level had to be establish. Again, as a provider, it should be out on the first date. No hobbyist will mind if it comes out on the first date. Honesty, it will not scare hobbyist away, it will only boost their confidence with you knowing that this is the type of service you provide.
When I "just go for it", I too also try to sense what the provider may be feeling, and her level of expectations. Sometimes, when she doesn't allow, then I play the vanilla role. If she does allow, then its game on. With some providers, before I even see them, I can have a sense of how filthy they can be. When I get their, their level of filthiness exceeded my expectations, and I am just drench in level of nastiness. I don't usually make determinations of the looks alone, but, I try to judge the providers physical appearances, most radiate filthy desires. Another factor, of course I check the reviews, and look at the type of services she provide. Hope I was helpful to clarifying myself.
Posted By: natashalynne
if you are able to get a real sense of how "truly nasty, filthy in mind and performance" a girl can be in the first visit. Unless you're much more assertive than most (generally respectful) clients are willing to risk being on a first visit, "truly nasty filth" can sometimes take more than one date to come out.
I can get nasty with the best of them, and I have submissive side that really loves some "nasty, filthy" play. I am turned on by activities that I know other providers will not tolerate. But I'm a dichotomy - my appearance and demeanor are VERY girl next door, and I attract professional men who are attracted to my GND side, not my trashy side. So that's how I market myself, and I do really enjoy the connections I've established with my GFE clients.
So, especially on a first visit, I follow the lead of the client - if I sense that he is looking for vanilla GFE, then I am more than happy to provide that, and I will enjoy it. But if that client has a secret "dark" side that he wants to explore more, I'm definitely game. But lots of guys are afraid to go there at first because they're afraid of the girl's reaction. So sometimes - not always, but often - it can take 2 or 3 dates before a comfort level is established that allows the extent of the nastiness to be discovered.
Or do you just go for it, and see how she'll react? Or do you see girls who just put it out there initially? Or are there things you look for on a girl's website?....
