I mean, look at ADJ, Gambler, AsianMan getting all the ladies.
Maybe Asians are the superior race after all? rofl
:
What's this "maybe" shit? Of course we are. lmao
but it really helps to be only half Asian, preferably like me, Italian from the waist down and Asian from the waist up. lol
Asian from the neck up.
Italian at heart.
French in my lips.
And African from the waist down.
Oh the rest is pure a-shole. Lol.
Btw, in general, providers are largely dating my wallet, which usu is cheap unless a beautiful woman is involved.
The only provider who didn't care about my wallet ended up getting it.
but it really helps to be only half Asian, preferably like me, Italian from the waist down and Asian from the waist up. lol
but at least you got "coupons" lol
I will be eagerly waiting to see that new poster here, Mr. "anothercheatingjohn" lol
I think ADJ is halfy too. I'm guessing he's Asian from the waist down as well. LMAO
no way in hell providers will ever consider dating a guy if they really liked him. I mean women are emotionless loveless creatures who never need love or be pampered, right?
-- Modified on 5/3/2014 9:59:14 AM
They don't have REAL lives, and if you must know they simply hang upside down in the closet like a bat in between appointments.
Isn't it funny how one person can ask this very same question and get a real answer and the next day someone like the OP will ask it and get nothing but ridicule? I think maybe the first respondent sets the tone. If the first response is a serious one the rest of the thread tends to stay that way, if the first response busts his balls, the rest of us tend to pile on.
I guess the secret to asking this type of question is to not ask it if Inicky, CPA, Jack, you, me, ADJ et al are around to answer it.
I did the same but it didn't set a trend. Seems maybe inicky has more weight on trend setting lol
how i keep my 1,750.00 apt, and the lifestyle i have, which well any escort or dancer will tell you you get accustomed to a certain lifestyle...........................
I have had bf in past but if i am gonna not have the phone on or have time and energy for my regulars when they call. Whom like i have heard others say , they are my bread and butter.... So if i am gonna be too tired cuz i am spending my energy on a bf. and stuff. i will lose my apt, !
For me between {a air brush tan and regular tan same time can be 95 bucks }
To get belly strip, brazilian , full face {yes italian women need thier chins done too omg} plus tip the lady and eye brows, and arms I forget but last time i got my waxings done including tip it was 100. Then i went for a regular tan and airbrush tan plus a tip 95.
I recently spent alot of time with some one. Whom was a massage client first time we met. For 160. Then he slept over 2 times or so and we spent time together, and i fell behind and got burnt out.
For me its different i have fibromyalgia and a few mental problems so I have to keep things AS SIMPLE and easy as possible. I get very tired from too many guys around. If I were to ever have a bf hed either have to help me with the rent or be ok with me not ever having sex with him. I dont have enough energy mentally or physically to do both. Again most my good paying clients and regulars i am close too. I think the only reason they help me so much is because we clique and hit it off so well. I have a regular coming today to give me a pre pay for aday long hang out on 17th. I may have him stay over if he wants. He is coming to bail me out and give me a check for a gran made out to my landlord. We arent doing the appt today, but i made mistake of wasting alot of energy with a guy i met from a 160 dollar massage who then didnt wanna throw me any types of help after that and i just dont have a life where I can handle a boyfriend and also keep the pace with my expensive living and things. I get great reviews and charge alot, But if i stop taking care myself and cant afford to wax, tan, or have enough time and money to make it via cab to counseling twice a week. I just have a life that doesnt include a boyfriend in it, I have quite to be with guys before but one of them was a biker who had a house for me to move into with him, so it was easy for me to stop to be with him,
If i stopped escorting and got a normal job i d have to live in a rooming house!
Just last week i went to my psychiatrist one day it was 50 there and back by cab, then psychiatrist next day 50 there and back cab,.
I just dont have enough energy to have a bf in free time, I actually am exhausted after my dealings with the clients, and definetly hit it off the regulars enough where i am also more than satisfied after and wouldnt ever wanna even look at va dick for several days after they leave!
I am going to see a hot guy this week who is sexy nice, and gave me 900 once for a little over an hour session, mostly bj, ... He was cute and nice and i d definetly hang out with him in real life. I d probly even move in with him, I dont see point in running myself into the ground to try and have penis in my face 24/7. I already have an outcall tonight, a guy coming to drop off my pre pay for our day /night whatever next week, then the other one this week. I dont have regulars that arent cute and good in bed either. If I dont like a client or we dont clique they usually dont come back.
I always have like older guys and i especially get horny when some one is making my life easy for me. Having a 1750 apt on the water. spending most my time being relaxed and enjoying things i like having the free time to do. I like having alot extra time to excercize and cook and take good care myself and get enough sleep and stuff, and make sure i eat right, for me i have a goal and its to pay off the student loans , i was a troubled kid and never made it to cosmetology licensure, i graduated though, after 6 years your schooling is devalid and your not able to go for the state boards. So here I am at age 33. A 16 grand student loan, no savings acoount, and hoping to fix my credit and attend lynn community college in next few years to do vet tech course.
I met guys i like but i personally dont have much extra energy left after working. I get into my appts with the really good paying ones and thats why they pay alot cuz we have a blast. If all a sudden I am havn sex all night with a bf then the regular with the 1,300 to spend shows awaiting a day of havn anal several times through out day hours of massage long bj, Its alot of money but i cant swing havn a bf too and swing gettn the donations i do from certain guys, They expect a certain performance/energy level. i cant produce after also being physical with a bf during week.
If i met a guy and he wanted to hang out all time I d end up behind and then remeber this is a time to get my life together and work on myself, I also like not being stressed out over bills food money, Every time i start or have started seein a client for free, i end up tired and behind with bills and angry with myself for even doing that, I have gotten into seein clients before not just for business it always end with me being pissed i am now mentally exhausted and also behind, this past week i saw 3 people and made no 4 people and made 2,230 got atop that 125 in chinese food too. {i always count the bonuses tossed in thier }
BUT in midst of all that prosperity one appt was entire day and i was so tired after , no way i woulda felt like dealing with a guy in my face i was tired. and all 4 were nice and i had good time too and really had a hard orgasm with one the guys who is a slave to me, we meet alot and he is also good lookin, So then there are over 25 prank or time wasters i have blocked now. just from one week, I make alot money but i also am exhausted from weeding out the time wasters and all the texting ect ect. For me havn a bf gets in the way and just isnt a good things for me, ... Theyd have to be able to be ok with what i do and pay the rent and bills and help me with the student loans and the new schools tuition, If they wanna get in my way and consume my energy,m I d have to have them be capable of still keeping my goals in tact, No guy is worht me stomping on my goals and things i am working for. So if i was seeing a client then he stopped being supportive and was ruining the gameplanb i d definetly end it, and fast, If he was contributijng to the game plan and helping me reach me goals great, if not? i have plenty a good orgasms with the clients, and i have more than enough friends, So i am not in need of his freindship or sex, . I actually still know my friends home phone numbers i have had since i was 5 years old! and still call to say hi to them!
And all my friends i grew up with like myself are busy working and buying property and taking care themselves, people that feel the need to contantly be hangn around with thier friends, thats great but for me in free time i am wanting quiet and rather not have constant socializing, . i liek to balance all the socializing out with also have some time to relax my brain,
i have had alot of boyfriends before but dating some one you met doing this is always frustrating,
100% agree with you that you got some mental problems..
thats good i am glad you agree how bout rsponding to what the thread is about? i am sure every one is really lookin to hear people agree they think am a fruit cake,,,,,,
but ok if thats your contribution to the thread. go on with your bad self. And you are....................
Let me guess super perfect flawless inteliigent successful should i strive to be more like you? glad you agree. now wheres your response to the thread, ? geezus. boring, thats the best you could come up with for a post? wow, you must be a blast to do an appt with, lots of interesting ideas and things to say, wow,
So Angel, I'm so sorry for how life treats you sometimes...when you are obviously so giving.... I know just what you mean about those massage guys who don't think to tip if they cross over your old boundaries & especially your time. It can be hard to balance assertive-ness with warmth & kindness....
Also I hope you fibro eases up -that must be hell- your in my healing thoughts-
One thing you said I couldn't help but smile- older guys that care (take care of u) get you horny.....
To that I say -HELL yeah! Something about a man reaching in that wallet & saying.....
"don't worry baby your rent is paid"....
well there are few things that can make my panties that wet!!"
I never really thought of myself as materialistic..... But hey nothing gets me hotter ~like being a kept woman (spoiled)
Chin up Angel stay with your boundaries they work for you....oh & btw I've seen your pictures I'm sure your just as beautiful even if you didn't tan or wax!
Luvin life,
~Mindy
well there no big turn on of hangin with a guy then realizing you missed three appts by wasting energy on his ass. and now the cable and electric is getting shut off. thats not exactly the beginiings to a romantic day for me any how.
Spending time with bf translates to loss of income. Either bf has to support or she must spend less time with bf. Those are two turn offs compared civvy girls who don't suck dick for a living. No career? another turn off. No degree? yet another turn off. Runaway from family? Something ain't right, yet another turn off preventing me from taking her too seriously.
Sorry, nothing against some providers and I tend to be open minded and keep options open, but I very much prefer a normal civvy girl when it comes to dating.
It takes more than a pretty face. If the girl is worth it, sure there are obviously exceptions but I prefer keeping the hobby a hobby and civvy world a civvy world. When it comes to a more serious relationship, a women who don't suck dick for a living is much preferred for ltr. It's a turn off if a girl has no other marketable skills. sorry but that's what the bigger brain says and it's the truth when it comes to LTR not STR/fling.
I'm sure most guys thinking with their smaller head would jump right in and pamper any hot provider like a damsel in distress, but how long is the relationship going to last? one he realizes he's tired of being with the same girl? and she's constantly needing time away fucking other guys or he has to support her otherwise?
How do you start a family or a serious relationship with a girl who's still fucking other guys? I'd date on a much less serious level but unless she retires it'll be difficult for me to take the relationship to a more serious level.
With someone who's working 40 hours a week?
You've just decided one's ok and one's not
I said, I preferably don't wish to start a family with a girl who is fucking other guys and sucking their dick while I'm watching the kids. she'd have to retire if she wants to get married otherwise I'm gonna be hobbying too, fucking other girls, and not treat the relationship all that seriously. lol
I dont mind dating an escort but it's out of the question for marriage unless the girl retires. Most guys (who have plenty other civvy options) will be the same, despite what they tell you. That's assuming they are even thinking about marriage. When
I'm sure there are guys who dont mind marrying a working girl who is still working, but not me. Last thing I want is to be stuck for years with an old broke escort whom I need to take care of from beginning to end. I'd have to be madly in love for me to do that but still it's a very big turn off if a girl has nothing else going on with her civvy career yet blowing it all away on shoes and designer bags. now if she's educating herself, getting a degree or actively doing something to prepare for her inevitable retirement that's a different story
I really don't know how some girls find a way to balance having a BF and working in the hobby. It just seems that something would have to "give" if you tried to be all things to all people.
...about OTC time, dating, etc.
It could also be that I'm a morning person. lol
I have and probably wouldn't again. Never say never, but always say 'caution'.
Whether we like it or not, or know it true or not true, people see this profession from a different perspective than those who have actually used it as a resource for income. As we all know, society has put a huge stigma on P4P... I just heard someone who has no clue what I do, say, "Hookers are fucked up." My response, "Why? They find a way to make money and use that resource." Response: "Yeah, but anyone who would resort to that has issues." When I heard him say that, I only heard him repeating words that have been engrained in his brain by society.
I want to have a relationship where the person has no cloudy vision of who I am, what I am capable of, or my outlook on life. When the time is right, and they've earned my trust and I've found they like me for me, and my past is my past, I'll slowly introduce it to them.
A person seeing a prostitute may have the same mindset, but is still utilizing the resource.
In conclusion - first impressions are everything, and I want my first impression to be me, and not my sexuality or what others say to think of someone in my position. I also want the same impression of him.
As life evolves, answers change. And when you're blinded by love, you do things you never thought you would do. So in reality, there's no way to know if I would or not - but I hope not for the sake of building a relationship on the foundation of who he and I are as people and not during P4P.
-- Modified on 5/3/2014 8:38:02 AM
most honest and comprehensible response to this type of question I have ever seen... and as you say, there have been many of these type questions.
Honestly, the fact that there are so many threads like this leads me to believe that the situation occurs more frequently than we like to admit. And Angel's response, your response... offer great insight into why so very, very few situations where the transition from provider/client to real world couple succeeds.
Of course, even in civvie life there are many, many more introductory dates than "true connection" dates. Perhaps the two worlds are simply reflections of one another? We are first people, with needs and emotions, strengths and weaknesses - no matter the conditions under which we meet.
I think you have a beautiful attitude and clear perspective on this.
there is a huge stigma... I think a lot of people - all of us- have certain prejudices about this world, even if we participate in it. We internalize society's misguided take on it, and project that onto each other. "All guys who do this are lonely, ugly, cheating, etc.", "All ladies who do this are messed up, had bad childhoods, acting out sexually, scammers, etc." And let's face it- a lot of times people fit the stereotypes. But obviously this isn't always the case- as a matter of fact ive never met the male stereotype here, and relatively few women I've met fit the female stereotype.
However (and I'm just going to address this from one side now), when someone doesn't fit the provider stereotype, people still project it onto them. They are just waiting for the provider's "true colors" to show. Even if the provider is leagues apart from the average civvie lady, she'll always be tarnished by the assumed stereotype, and will always have to fight against it- both the projection of it by others and her own internalization of it. This is most poignant in romantic relationships.
It takes an incredibly secure man to be able to date a provider. It takes a man who can rise above his more primitive self to remind himself to be aware of the stigma and not let it cloud his actions and thoughts. And likewise, it takes an incredibly secure provider to date a man (of any sort) and not let internalized wh*re stigma color her actions and thoughts. These two incredibly secure people will necessarily be more self-actualized than average people.
So it's not impossible, but it's not for the lazy. You have to work hard on yourself to be able to do it successfully. I am proud to say I know of several successful couples. In two cases the provider quit, but the gents are incredibly wealthy so the ladies' livelihoods weren't an issue. In another, the lady still provides and the gent is fine with it. They both run another business together, and they keep very busy. In another, the guy was never a client, and lady didn't actually begin providing until after they'd been married a few years. All of these relationships have lasted many years- one 14 years. I also know many others, just not as personally as I know these four.
Edited to add that I just thought of six more I know very well! Give me time and I'm sure there'd be even more! I should write a book about these couples. It would make for some very interesting reading.
So it's not impossible! It does and can happen. But one has to ask themself how hard they are willing to work on it. How well they can dispel the stigma and perhaps even fight against it. Nobody will live comfortably in a lie. Whether the lady chooses to continue or chooses to leave, she will have always and forever been here. You can't erase a past. (And I certainly wouldn't want to- but that's a whole 'nother thread! Lol)
Of course, even in civvie life there are many, many more introductory dates than "true connection" dates. Perhaps the two worlds are simply reflections of one another? We are first people, with needs and emotions, strengths and weaknesses - no matter the conditions under which we meet.
-- Modified on 5/3/2014 10:42:33 AM
While I do agree you have to work at it. I disagree that you have to "work hard on yourself" to be able to date a provider, from the male perspective at least. I believe that if you have to "work on yourself" you are fighting an uphill battle. I believe you either accept her for what who she is, or you don't. I don't think a man can successfully "work on that"
Some guys as you both have said have been brought up to look down on "hookers" and I think if a man has that mindset you aren't going to change him. No matter how hard he tries to bury those thoughts they are going to come to the surface at some time. and the first time there is a fight, or the tenth, it going to rear it's ugly head as in "well you were just a whore when I met you" or something hurtful like that.
Some of us don't think that way, and I think it's one of the reason I have had so many successful LTR's with providers, I don't look down on "hookers" I might be politically incorrect, but deep down I treat women who do this for a living no different than I would treat any other woman. OTOH, I have adult ADD and am probably lousy "long term" material, but I am living proof that not all clients look down on the women they see, and it's not something I ever had to "work on"
aside from that I agree with most of the rest of your post and I further agree that a hooker/john or for the PC folk here a provider/client relationship certainly has a unique set of challenges.
may have a point that some men can't or won't change, but I disagree that all men who were raised to look down on "hookers" can't think differently. One of the couples I mentioned has a gent like that- raised in a very traditional and well-to-do Latin family.
I think by the time you're in a relationship, however, it's too late to work on yourself. You have to have already done the work by the time you meet someone, or there is a very high likelihood that the relationship will fail.
If you have to "work" on that once you are in a relationship, I believe that relationship is already doomed.
This is the first thing that comes to mind when thinking of dating a client. The second is his thinking that it was his skill, strength, and brains that brought me to the next path in my life - and not my own; thus, building on the wrong foundation. If, however, I meet him outside of this because of similar interests and levels of success in other areas, I, in his mind, have gotten myself there - I can then tell him what I did in the past, what good I got out of it, why I changed direction, and how I became what I've become that day. (Theoretically speaking.)
No shortage of those dudes here either.
Part of the problem is that you gals are far too good at the GFE deal and some delusional johns think it's for real. While I recognize that there is always an outlier...the only way for a relationship to work is built first on trust.
Without that there is no relationship. Or at least one that will be around in short order.
They, in fact, need to be saved in some instances. From loneliness or the feeling of lack of purpose.
In reality, there are many ladies in this profession who are doing very well, and are more financially stable than when they had jobs. Many feel sorry for us, but forget we've chosen this path of life for a reason. Whatever that reason is on a deeper level, it revolves around finances and making a living.
Same for guys who have chosen to see hookers. It revolves around sex and human companionship. (I am speaking generally. There are other reasons, I'm sure.)
So why does Captain Save-A-Hoe dish over the dough to help his damsel in distress? To get what he entered into the hobby for - sex and companionship - and the feeling of being wanted and needed. He has found a way to feel he is adding to the life of a woman. Charity makes people feel good about themselves.
Sometimes people genuinely give with NSA, but usually the demands get bigger, the needs get greater, and the circumstances change. The woman enters into the relationship with her savior, only to find out he cannot (or gets tired of) providing for her, when the relationship should be based on reality at a certain point.
From my experience, the help has always been offered as 'loans', leaving the woman in even more debt and trouble than she was in in the first place. Especially if she entered into the profession due to inability to work.
Captain Save-a-Hoe doesn't realize what he's getting himself into until far into the relationship. Some gals have the ability to get into the lifestyle she set out to do very quickly, whereas the goals of other ladies are much larger and difficult to achieve - i.e. pursuing fame or a career in the arts... opening a business... getting a PhD.
"If you love me, I wouldn't have to pay you." is said, (based on many conversations I've had and witnessed myself,) very often by Johns. But the Johns are the ones who convinced the girl to trust him and leave the profession when it was never her intent. Even if she has feelings for him, she still has goals. Falling in love or lust can make us forget about our goals (as can shiny, pretty things in the department store,) but we will remember those goals, and that we're giving up those goals for someone who can't or won't deliver eventually.
Back to square one, only with heartbreak and disappointment.
If anyone is going to leave the profession, make a spreadsheet, look inside, and take time to see your true intentions for the future on all levels - not just immediate intentions.
Part of the problem is that you gals are far too good at the GFE deal and some delusional johns think it's for real. While I recognize that there is always an outlier...the only way for a relationship to work is built first on trust.
Without that there is no relationship. Or at least one that will be around in short order.
they almost always use money as a weapon, are usually quite manipulative, and often use their "help" as a way to insinuate themselves into a woman's life.
Captain save a ho's don't want to be a "real" relationship with a hooker, they want to own here, and will be the very first ones to tell her "remember what I did for you?" the moment she starts acting "uppity"
These are typically the guys who come on here whining about how badly some hooker treated them after he "gave his heart" to her, and then goes on about all the gifts, loans etc he gave her, only for her to turn her back on him. IMO these guys get exactly what they deserve.
Using the money as a weapon-
How precisely you put it. Dead on.
I refuse to be controlled- (I may be more easily reasoned with than ever forced or controlled.)
I had dinner with a very rich man once.
He offered me more than I have ever been offered (new car, condo, tuition, some expenses) under some conditions.
I didn't like his control freak conditions.
(Example: "You will not be allowed to smoke and only drink when I allow." You allow??? Say what?)
That was the last time I saw him.
You go for dinner with some dude who tells you he's rich (who knows...unless you've got access to his personals you wouldn't know if he has anything). Then he presumably offers you a car, condo and shit. Why would he make that offer out of right field? I'm sure there's more to the story...I hope LOL
But from your little story I would suggest he is into BDSM...and control is a very common feature that Dom's like to use. Maybe you pretended that you were a true sub..and when he called you on it...you freaked out?
Yep...I'll go with that story.
UNLESS....you were so dumb as to not accept the offer and realize that once the titles passed on all those toys they'd be yours to sell and pocket the money. And then blow the dude off.
Or...you just wanted to create a funny with us.
Hey...if this was a true dude let me know. I know many gals who would do that deal the right way and walk out with some coin. Just ask VStiviano LOL
How precisely you put it. Dead on.
I refuse to be controlled- (I may be more easily reasoned with than ever forced or controlled.)
I had dinner with a very rich man once.
He offered me more than I have ever been offered (new car, condo, tuition, some expenses) under some conditions.
I didn't like his control freak conditions.
(Example: "You will not be allowed to smoke and only drink when I allow." You allow??? Say what?)
That was the last time I saw him.
Pretty interesting brand marketing though.
But from your little story I would suggest he is into BDSM...and control is a very common feature that Dom's like to use. Maybe you pretended that you were a true sub..and when he called you on it...you freaked out?
Yep...I'll go with that story.
UNLESS....you were so dumb as to not accept the offer and realize that once the titles passed on all those toys they'd be yours to sell and pocket the money. And then blow the dude off.
Or...you just wanted to create a funny with us.
Hey...if this was a true dude let me know. I know many gals who would do that deal the right way and walk out with some coin. Just ask VStiviano LOL
How precisely you put it. Dead on.
I refuse to be controlled- (I may be more easily reasoned with than ever forced or controlled.)
I had dinner with a very rich man once.
He offered me more than I have ever been offered (new car, condo, tuition, some expenses) under some conditions.
I didn't like his control freak conditions.
(Example: "You will not be allowed to smoke and only drink when I allow." You allow??? Say what?)
That was the last time I saw him.
coupon worthy?
But from your little story I would suggest he is into BDSM...and control is a very common feature that Dom's like to use. Maybe you pretended that you were a true sub..and when he called you on it...you freaked out?
Yep...I'll go with that story.
UNLESS....you were so dumb as to not accept the offer and realize that once the titles passed on all those toys they'd be yours to sell and pocket the money. And then blow the dude off.
Or...you just wanted to create a funny with us.
Hey...if this was a true dude let me know. I know many gals who would do that deal the right way and walk out with some coin. Just ask VStiviano LOL
How precisely you put it. Dead on.
I refuse to be controlled- (I may be more easily reasoned with than ever forced or controlled.)
I had dinner with a very rich man once.
He offered me more than I have ever been offered (new car, condo, tuition, some expenses) under some conditions.
I didn't like his control freak conditions.
(Example: "You will not be allowed to smoke and only drink when I allow." You allow??? Say what?)
That was the last time I saw him.
a steal for the guy.
If the girl is submissive, she can easily get this kind of arrangement.
I've encountered quite a few very dominant men who have offered SD situations with big perks. BBFS is required after trust is established, (i.e. you're only seeing them,) they usually get a really nice condo or apartment, a car, and a weekly allowance after bills. You can only see them, and can never have a male in your car or place - even if it's a friend - and have to be on game, looking perfect, and never sad or upset - ever.
Looking back, I'm summing up a 24/7/365 relationship, (usually 3 times per week they say they want to meet,) for a sum of what would cost about $5,000/month.
Men offer it knowing what an escort costs - and get a steal with these kinds of deals. They usually own multiple properties as investments, so it really comes to minimal cost to them with the condos.
I've had this type of arrangement offered 5-6 times and have left all of them within the first week lol. Way too controlling once they have you 'set up' in their little world.
i have come across a couple legit guys who've offered it, but I think doing what we do here is much better. Clearly set boundaries and not much maintenance in between. Condoms always used, (unless you're careless and oblivious to the fact that you're mortal,) and what's agreed upon is agreed upon.
-- Modified on 5/3/2014 6:42:36 PM
The woman might "agree" to not see any other men, but we all know better than that, except for the dumb fuck control freak who is paying her of course.
The guys that enter these types of arrangements are almost always married and with a thousand distractions in their lives, the SB might only spend ten hours a week with her SD and the rest of the time she can be supporting her "real" boyfriend who knows all about it. I've seen it more than a few times. A lot of these "kept women" also moonlight as escorts, many of them work for agencies as UTR escorts so their pics aren't plastered all over the internet.
Men lie and cheat, and so do women. Neither sex has a monopoly on bad behavior
Two were always in my business and wanted me available whenever they called. I was over at one guys' house every night (he was divorced).
He did travel, and I highly doubt, if I opted for the arrangement, I would have been his 'one and only'. But at the time, I didn't know this stuff even existed. If I did, I never would have been looking around for an SD in the first place, lol.
I do get what you're saying. Many women do 'moonlight'. But there are guys out there who are extremely controlling and almost like stalkers - you never know when they'r egoing to call or show up. And if you're out badoinkin' with another dude - who knows what would happen. I didn't want to mess with it, so I just didn't go with the arrangement.
for considerably more money, and they too regretted it almost immediately and yes one of the guys became a stalker after she left him.
I think for this type of arrangement to work, either there has to be some type of feeling by the woman for the guy, (not necessarily love, but something) OR she has to have a lot of freedom or that nice townhouse or penthouse apartment quickly becomes a "gilded cage" and life with some control freak can become a nightmare.
The practical reality is the guy typically wants a nonpro (younger, more apt to control, in dire financial straits) but it's the pros who are answering the ads.
I think for this type of arrangement to work, either there has to be some type of feeling by the woman for the guy, (not necessarily love, but something) OR she has to have a lot of freedom or that nice townhouse or penthouse apartment quickly becomes a "gilded cage" and life with some control freak can become a nightmare.
I doubt you generate that most months.
If you did you wouldn't be bitching and moaning about your late rents, late phone and so on.
Just saying 
left for the client they fell in love with and married had careers (in one case two of them) that they held while they were providers. They both continued those careers after quitting this. Yes- it's so important to know who you are and what you want out of a relationship (heck- out of life in general!) before you even meet someone.
How much you like being called "Court" by our resident Captain-Save-a-Ho?
... Ho-Save-a-Ho? I LOVE HoHos. You should see how one eats these things. There is a special method ya know. It's all in the pace.
-- Modified on 5/3/2014 2:15:27 PM
You know you really need to take off those training wheels if you ever expect him to be able to take care of himself someday. After all, you aren't getting any younger and you won't always be around to protect him. It might be time to finally cut that cord before it strangles him.
no one is getting any younger. Did I miss a new serum on the market or something?
Not me of course, I couldn't possibly be more immature than I already am.
I just thought it would be rather cute if you were here like a mother bear to protect her cub. Oh well, our loss.
did you just say the word 'cute'? Ok it just got weird in here. As someone once said to me, I think I actually 'heard' you saying that lol
and it's not like you haven't done it before, although I will admit it's been a while. lol
own, but I wouldn't personally classify him as a 'cub', at least not in my eyes. Plus I think it's obvious, a woman like me has no time nor the patience for 'cubs' in this world. However, who's to say my local boytoy 'cub' didn't have me propped up on my kitchen counter last night probably as you were writing this post lol.
Yes, a woman has needs even in this world sometimes and has to think of herself every once in a while, even if it's only for an hour lol. While I enjoy the company of my gentlemen friends here over all other, when I can't or don't have an engagement, well ya know how that can be sometimes. It twas an ever grueling week lol. I have been a very 'good girl' though, haven't called on 'him' in over 8 months. He is simple, stunning, direct and no drama, just how I like it. I am only human ya know lol. I wouldn't want to be labelled a 'slut' or anything, now would I lol.
Plus, the notion of any man in this world displaying signs of possessiveness, jealousy or even over- protectiveness is downright silly if you ask me upon reading this. But, yes we are all human and it happens more times than not. Most men here playing in p4p are 'attached' and I am single woman giving myself to them first, however, if and when 'I' choose to play (on the side) I have that right as well, without consequence. Afterall, just because you are paying for our time, does not also mean you own us to any extent inside or outside of 'that' time. That's just silly, silly, silly.
-- Modified on 5/4/2014 7:27:56 AM
Some of my best friends are sluts.
And where have I EVER expressed the desire to "own" anybody. The problem with ownership of another human being is that they in turn own you as well. So I will pass, TYVM
and I thought I made this clear. I do not pay for "time and companionship" I pay for NSA sex, nothing more and nothing less. If I wanted to pay for "companionship" I would buy a dog.
OPs question is clearly asking providers
So EC isn't really coming back for me? 
Part of the problem is that you gals are far too good at the GFE deal and some delusional johns think it's for real. While I recognize that there is always an outlier...the only way for a relationship to work is built first on trust.
Without that there is no relationship. Or at least one that will be around in short order.
When dating a civvie guy, how do you reconcile the feelings that must arise if and when he makes a disparaging remark about hookers, not knowing of course that he is unwittingly dating one?
There is a certain benefit in dating someone where you can be 100% open and honest about who you are and what you do. Of course I will concede that many hobbyists deep down don't respect the ladies they see or even themselves for seeing them in the first place, but those guys are too fucked up for you to ever be dating on of them in the first place.
This is why I'm a great fan of being honest from the start. Once the guy's earned her trust and likes her for her, it will be more painful and complicated to deal with his not being able to handle her past. He'll feel cheated and lied to whether he has the right to feel that way or not. You're starting your relationship on shaky grounds and that's a recipe for failure.
Trust me, there are plenty of men strong enough to handle this. By being up front, you eliminate those who can't right way. Let them go their own way- you'll never be happy together. Hold out for someone worthy.
-- Modified on 5/3/2014 10:51:41 AM
I know the answer, but it's not a quick one - and it seems the more words I type, the more room there is for confusion, so I'm going to mull over how I'll communicate this one. Stay tuned... hopefully the response won't get buried in a bunch of other responses lol.
Shouldn't be allowed anywhere near them, or charged triple. Providers have it tough enough already with the social stigma of the profession, limited SO possibilities, etc. that they shouldn't have to put up with jerks that don't respect them for P4P or otherwise.
Providers, like any woman, have my respect by default until they individually prove to me to be unworthy of that respect. Of course, some have done exactly that, but there are others that I respect even a lot more after meeting them and getting to know them a bit. There are some that I'd like to be both a client and a friend too, but that's often difficult. There's one that I've succeeded in spanning that gap with, though, and we have a very good, if unusual, relationship. She calls it a boyfriend that helps pay the bills.
your post doesn't make much sense. I'm assuming the women on this board are for the most part independent and voluntarily entered the P4P industry to make money. Social stigma and limited SO opportunities are the benefit of the bargain they made when they chose this path. As for your comment that assholes who don't respect them shouldn't be allowed anywhere near them, don't you find that to be somewhat condescending and a tad bit disrespectful yourself? I don't know who you're seeing, but the women I've had the pleasure of meeting are very savvy business women, and are in no way shrinking violets. If someone were to get out of line with them, or otherwise act disrespectful, that would definitely be the last time they got together.
He seems to think these women are all fragile flowers made of glass that will break if not handled with the utmost care.
Now don't get me wrong, nobody deserves to be abused, but as you pointed out, these women are perfectly capable of taking care of themselves in that regard and they certainly don't need a bunch of white knights or Capt's save a ho, to protect them.
Well being disrespectful of providers specifically and women in general is certainly that attitude that a lot of males on this board seem to not only have, but to be proud of. I don't take it as a joke and don't think that it is meant as a joke. Maybe I'm way out of line, but I don't like seeing anyone disrespected that hasn't earned that disrespect. Not so long ago, being disrespectful to people used to go a good ways towards getting you into a world of hurt in RL. Now, being generally disrespectful of people isn't going to get you shot, but it divides you into those who have manners (gentlemen) and those who don't (use your own term here). Simple things, manners, but it differentiates people. It applies in RL or in cyberlife. Lump yourself into whichever pile you want.
I agree that most providers here are probably indies and pretty savvy and stand up for themselves. They don't need anyone else to run interference for them. I'm not trying to defend anyone.
There seems to be a disconnect between the board attitude towards providers of a lot of guys and what they must actually present to a provider if they are continuing to be seen by those providers. That's the part that I don't like, acting one way, but talking trash about the ladies on the board. Must be an ego-feeding tactic for someone whose ego needs self-inflating.
-- Modified on 5/3/2014 4:01:31 PM
Yep...I recall vividly your ramblings trying to support ole Ms. TER January...both of her personalities.
Sure seems that you would rather respect deception than truth.
Glad I'm not you...I'd hate to have to look in the mirror in the morning and hate that reflection. I know you have no self-respect.
And your hooker pal...it's not a BF that pays the bills...you're an ATM. Too many of you delusional misfits that have to pretend that fantasy is reality. As so many of the gals have posted here...guys like you are creepy.
Providers, like any woman, have my respect by default until they individually prove to me to be unworthy of that respect. Of course, some have done exactly that, but there are others that I respect even a lot more after meeting them and getting to know them a bit. There are some that I'd like to be both a client and a friend too, but that's often difficult. There's one that I've succeeded in spanning that gap with, though, and we have a very good, if unusual, relationship. She calls it a boyfriend that helps pay the bills.
Yes, another clueless JohnnyBoy who has convinced himself he has found a girlfriend. He and Turdwell should get along just fine, you know washing each others hair, doing each others nails and commiserating about how mean we are to them on TER. lmao
The best women are expert at creating an alluring, enticing, sexually provocative atmosphere, meant to overwhelm the client's senses and bring them coming back for more. Their attire (or lack thereof), makeup, smell, attitude and demeanor are all calculated measures meant to maximize their earning potential. Most of us realize this, thoroughly enjoy the session, and know full well the illusion vanishes once we walk out the door. What happens when you date a client in real life? Do you drop the make-believe world of escort/client and interact in a purely civilian capacity? Does the client become disillusioned with the "real" you?
Haven't you found in civvie relationships that you meet a woman, she's dressed great, looks great, and is in her best form? And you date a few times and it's the same or better? And then, as you become comfortable with each other, you see her without the nice clothes, without the makeup, and eventually see the real person with all of her good and bad points
And vice versa: the doors eventually aren't opened, the seat isn't pulled out at the dinner table, the seat isn't put down in the bathroom, there aren't anymore flowers (unless something's up...), tongue kissing disappears, they scratch their arses right in front of you...
So I guess you have to imagine all (or most) of this being the case with a potential partner, and if that thought doesn't deter you, perhaps there's something there!
I wouldn't mind doing so with a provider, I mean let's be Frank (or Bill, or George, damn I'm funny) but seriously I'm a hobbyist, the very last person I'm ever going to pass judgement on is a woman who has facilitated me from not having to settle for some broad just to get laid. Honestly, I really think women in the provider profession exhibit great skills for being a potential mate, for me anyway, compassion, confidence, drive, independence, tenacity, good judge of character, forgiving and the ability to look past the outer layer because I am not now nor have I ever been an attractive man (and I'm completely ok with that fact, in order for there to be attractive people there must be less attractive people, it's simply the law of average. If everyone were beautiful then no one would be).
How do you know if the compassion, confidence, drive, independence, tenacity, judge of character, forgiving nature and all that are real? I'd guess that compassion is faked often, and that perceived confidence is often a front. Same with confidence, etc.
Perhaps it's just my perception. I would think that a provider would have to posses at least most of those qualities, but you are absolutely right, I don't know that for sure.
I would say that for survival purposes a provider would need to be a good judge of character, but perhaps some aren't.
So they don't have to try and be any judge of character.
They just need to know (as best they can) that you'e not a dangerous sort.
If you want to know if a gal can be a judge of any character...buy a long date and listen to her babble about all her bad relationships. That should give you a clue.
I would say that for survival purposes a provider would need to be a good judge of character, but perhaps some aren't.
It's good to be humbled, I guess it's a moot point though as I have absolutely no intention of getting back in a relationship, period.
They just need to know (as best they can) that you'e not a dangerous sort.
If you want to know if a gal can be a judge of any character...buy a long date and listen to her babble about all her bad relationships. That should give you a clue.
I would say that for survival purposes a provider would need to be a good judge of character, but perhaps some aren't.
thats exactly the attitude that end up attracting relationships oddly enough, at least with me when i am sick of men and wanna be alone, and purposely try and avoid em, in civvie life. I dress up for clients but not in free time i like dress like sporty dike lady. when not meetin clients.
But when your avoiding meeting some one it always is when you do. At least for me.
I dont have a scholarly hours and hours of conversation for a client, Most my stories are gonna either be about singing in bands or crazy thing i did growing up, i dont have this like pre acted out story about my debutant life and my degree from havaford, i went to school for a trade, after taking an equivelency exam, I onlky ended up in a 2 grand a month ocean front apt cuz i can make people laugh and fuck good.! go figure.
I know if you only have war stories and craziness when the fucking stops , and the thai shiatsu, you gotta do a discounted rate for social time, like me, xo
I would I have and will again ,. Date clients, Is it good? not always but i have a history of stormy relationships and i doubt thats gonna end anytime soon. one of the bonuses to bein CRAZY again,... But yes i have dated many , many clients, and yes all them were a little nutz too so. .... lol. But if you have feelings for some one you should see whwrre it goes and give it a try, thats how i feel. Not sayin its gonna be smooth sailing, but why not? i know i have made attempted to date guys i met doing this. One is dead, i was his surprise when he got released from walpole, He got shot to death by the police two summers ago,. I was supposed to be his like surprise after he got outta a 8 or nine year stint in walpole. We ended up dating few years off n on after. three others i met doing this i dated, are in federal prisons, One was with the guy that got shot he lived and is in prison. He took me to his dads for christmas, and snow tubing at gunstock, and family stuff, Then the other two i also met they had called my ads then zi dated them , and then , i recently tried to date one again and again he was yet another jail bird, and again it didnt work out, I tend to like criminals for some weird reason? Maybe cuz they are crazy like me. not sure.......................
Seriously?? "I tend to like criminals?"
Not intentionally, I didnt wake up and say i want my next wifey to be some one who has been in trouble before.
I personally have no control of who I am atrracted too I cant control what turns me on.
Can you?
if you could control who turns you on just think , you could make only your wife turn you on and then save all your money , correct?
Last I checked who gets your heart racin isnt really like a choice , but more often than not there does tend to be a pattern, on the type we choose to make out partner.
so yes SERIOUSLY i have dated men and women whom have either had rocky pasts or even who continue too, yes SERIUOSLY grant loser .
and you apparently like to pay women for sex, so thats equally as baffling to me, so there. go on with yer bad self and the 95 ladies you reviewed.
to me that is like deserving of a huge SERIOUSLY? if we could choose whom we fall in love with then i am sure youd choose to be turned on by a woman you can land in the sack for free. am i right ? If humans were in control of whom they choose to fall in love with then wouldnt most yall fall in love with women who are ok with the hobby ? or do you enjoy lying and spending money that was meant on the kids tuition on escorts, I guess the guys cant control whom they fall into seriuos relationships with either, like how the hell a guy with 95 reviews gonna type seriuosly under commenting about my type? like yeah seriuosly thats been my track record. And yours is cheating and fucking women who obviuosly cant stand you, since out of 95 not a one white listed ya! so your not any better there losah! yeah thought so deauces biaaaatch,
-- Modified on 5/4/2014 9:32:43 AM
no wonder why you have no clue,
people fall in love with people . why?
because they do.
it could be an older man, a fat chic, i was in love with a fat chic once and yes i happen to have a pattern of dating guys just released from prison who go back, i am unsure why and i dont care life takes me where it takes me and i have zero apologies if your old man pants are in a bunch over it, waaaaah, sorry gramps did i startle you? oh god help us, . and what you date fuckn saints ? and hows that goin for ya?
apparently she aint suckn yer prick now is she so maybe you should take a que from me and step outside the hole you live in and try dating some one cuz you like them not cuz they are an upstanding member of society, If you stop worrying about what every one thinks of you and do what YOU want maybe you wouldnt have 96 reviews and not a single lady white listed you, thats pretty sad, and with your uptight rude attitude , i can tell your a draining close minded "my shit dont stink type."
um seriuosly seriuosly?
yes seriuosly you old fart, whut? no i am joking, wtf? like wow.
Many of "us" hide our whitelists...for a variety of reasons.
How's that rent coming along?
people fall in love with people . why?
because they do.
it could be an older man, a fat chic, i was in love with a fat chic once and yes i happen to have a pattern of dating guys just released from prison who go back, i am unsure why and i dont care life takes me where it takes me and i have zero apologies if your old man pants are in a bunch over it, waaaaah, sorry gramps did i startle you? oh god help us, . and what you date fuckn saints ? and hows that goin for ya?
apparently she aint suckn yer prick now is she so maybe you should take a que from me and step outside the hole you live in and try dating some one cuz you like them not cuz they are an upstanding member of society, If you stop worrying about what every one thinks of you and do what YOU want maybe you wouldnt have 96 reviews and not a single lady white listed you, thats pretty sad, and with your uptight rude attitude , i can tell your a draining close minded "my shit dont stink type."
um seriuosly seriuosly?
yes seriuosly you old fart, whut? no i am joking, wtf? like wow.
They've done it, but there was always this nagging feeling eating away at them that they were leaving thousands of dollars on the table by going OTC with someone who used to be a regular source of income.
We should ask the Yankees if they ever considered making a touchdown.
Paying for sex, providing sex for cash, that's one game.
Dating a person--although it seems to many to be something ever so real and devoid of fantasy--is a different game.
Dating doesn't lift a relationship to some higher, more meaningful level. It's just exploring a different way of sharing material and emotional goods. The guy buys dinner, the gal... Does whatever seems appropriate return for a good meal.
Owing to the scarcity of individual selves these days, there are fewer and fewer successful couples.
Wading through counterfeit people, independent providers have a better shot at becoming a true self than a lot of women in other walks of life.
But why, in the middle of one game, would they want to switch gears and start playing a different One? Maybe for diversion.
Men prefer the economics of dating, but they find the sex better in the other game
The economics of dating are often much worse than P4P, but a lot of times the sex is even better. Not always, but sometimes.
Sometimes, even in P4P two people just end up liking each other. The problem is a lot of delusional men read a lot more into a situation than there really is, and the "relationship" over and above him paying her of course, is all in his head.
The economics ARE worse in dating. Especially if the man takes a woman for cocktails-- moderate drinking; he'd prefer a beer-- then to a show, which he doesn't really want to see but she does, THEN to dinner where she's impressed with the swank restaurant, but he's staring at the right-hand side of the menu, AND FINALLY a goodnight kiss that he wants to go further, and if it does, it's okay. Expensive mediocrity.
But, even with that being the case, guys STILL prefer to spend there money in that way rather than providing real material good for the woman. It feels better somehow, but it's only a different method of sharing.
Sometimes transactional relationships evolve, sometimes they don't. If people relate to each other in a good way, moment to moment, the evolution isn't what's important. The moment is complete. In the trade we come to really understand this, and so it goes how it goes.
We're in agreement about this, otherwise one of us would ditch the lifestyle.
One day people might do P4P, and maybe on another day they'll go to a movie. This in itself doesn't mean that they know one another any bother, or that they like each other more, or that seeing a movie together puts their relationship on a higher level. It's just one activity then another. The moment always has the same possibility, the same degree of "meaningfulness."
... for some. I don't think it's always as 'easy' as that may sound ... for some.
I guess for those who actually hold the key to 'cracking this code', followed with the 'want', the 'need' and the 'ability' of cracking this code, I guess I'll just chalk it up to the truly 'meant to be' scenario then .... just as it sounds.
For one, it seems like an extremely complex innermost code paired with a very rare key that no matter how grand it may appear and/or appeal to open from the outside, it may just not quite fit right on the inside ... for some.
Maybe some things aren't supposed to be figured out, no matter what key you hold or how simple or complex that code really is.
Interesting thread. Good points Miss GFE
Is this like the DaVinci Code?
I guess for those who actually hold the key to 'cracking this code', followed with the 'want', the 'need' and the 'ability' of cracking this code, I guess I'll just chalk it up to the truly 'meant to be' scenario then .... just as it sounds.
For one, it seems like an extremely complex innermost code paired with a very rare key that no matter how grand it may appear and/or appeal to open from the outside, it may just not quite fit right on the inside ... for some.
Maybe some things aren't supposed to be figured out, no matter what key you hold or how simple or complex that code really is.
Interesting thread. Good points Miss GFE
I for one am not sure where I stand on the whole 'cracking of this code', but having been approached here with this very personal topic (more than once) and not understanding the 'key' myself...wasn't sure what else to chalk it up to.
Sticky, sticky subject indeed. Very sticky lol. That damn key is so sticky LOL
He just got his most recent "favorable" review...maybe they lent him a key for something?
Are you into the entourage guys? Seems like they're everywhere now. But none of them have a key to anything.
Sticky, sticky subject indeed. Very sticky lol. That damn key is so sticky LOL.
But.......'entourage guys'????? Care to explain. New news to me.
-- Modified on 5/3/2014 2:21:00 PM
Except instead of a ring, they'd like a fat wad... Of cash. Lol.
NY board. Funny, is all I can say. But he's an alias, and you know how that goes unfortunately.
All my time spent away from my family is spent making money.
When I particularly like a client, I just offer more time. It's no sweat off my back if I don't have anyone else to see and if I hadn't planned on going home anyway. I pretty much act like myself all the time anyway, so it's not like I'm having to put forth a lot of energy to create a facade. And, most of the time I'm getting free food or a snuggle buddy out of it anyway.
I will not be dating until I've met my financial goals and retire.
Don't get me wrong though, it's easy to develop a special fondness of repeat gentlemen when you've only ever had a crappy S/O. Especially since men in the hobby are just so darn nice and generous. It's important to know the difference between "a special fondness" and deep feelings though. 