does tend to get you taken for granted. I've had it happen. I took a long break and honestly I did not know if I'd ever go back. When I did circle back, she seemed to be more inclinded to give her A game... but it has also been more business-like (which it is). You need to find more ladies... and more Favorites. I'm currently rotating 3 but am open to a new candidate if one strikes my fancy. I have tried a few but not hit another Favorite... yet.
As far as #2... you may be right. Providers are people too. Never the less, you have set your expectations. You might want to caution her about "mistakes"... She's undoubtably BBing her BF or SO. If you can't handle it, move on.
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I have been seeing two ladies regularly for the past year. Both are highly reviewed (average over 9 for both looks and performance), and every encounter I have had with them (once or twice a month so far this year) justify those scores. So what's the problem?
Lady #1 lately seems to take me for granted. Ok, boo hoo, but I have to say it's not a nice feeling. Recently I put a significant tip in the envelope. While I wasn't expecting a parade in my honor, I thought I would get at least an email or text thanking me. Nope. Nothing. I thought, ok, she got busy and forgot, but surely she will say something the next time I see her. I saw her a couple weeks later. Nope. Nothing.
Another time I brought a gift -- something that she lists on her website as "gifts that are appreciated but not expected." I got a perfunctory thanks and she put it aside. Ok, again, I wasn't expecting her to fall all over herself, but it would have been nice if she acted a bit more appreciative (as opposed to acting as though it was expected).
Possibly the final straw: the last time I saw her, she mentioned that she may have some personal business the following week in a neighboring city where I work. I offered to take her to lunch if she had time. She seemed to like the idea a lot, and we talked about different restaurants we could go to. We even laughed about different "cover stories" in case we were approached by people who knew me. As I left, she promised to let me know as soon as she knew for sure what her schedule would be so we could make arrangements. Yup, you guessed it. Total radio silence. Ok, she could have changed her mind. Fine, but a short email to let me know that she didn't need to come out to my city would have been considerate and appreciated.
So, will I continue to see her? Maybe. Nothing's changed with the looks/performance that attracted me to her in the first place. But I guess knowing that that's all I will get -- nothing more, nothing less -- will cause me to change my behavior toward her (she'll get the $$ -- nothing more, nothing less), and result in my broadening my horizons and seeing her less often.
With Lady #2, I have a different problem. She continues to be wonderful in every way, and very appreciative of anything extra I do. So what's the issue? The last couple times I saw her, although nothing was said, she gave me the very strong impression that she wanted to provide BBFS. The first time, I was on my back, she was hovering over my cock and just looked at me. We looked at each other for a couple seconds, she then giggled and reached into the drawer next to the bed for a condom. I thought it was a bit weird, but didn't think much of it. The next time, after some foreplay, she laid on her back, spread her legs and just looked at me. Again we looked at each other for a couple seconds, before this time I reached into the drawer to get a condom.
I suppose I could have this all wrong, and maybe she would have slugged me if I tried to enter BB. After all, what possible motivation would she have to take that risk? I've never asked for BBFS, and I never will. In fact, the fact that she may be willing to do that with me suggests she may do that with others, which totally creeps me out and wants me to head for the exits. So, providers and fellow hobbyists, what should I do? She's really a gem, and I don't want to stop seeing her based on my suspicion that she provides BBFS to her favorites. On the other hand, if she's doing that, I don't want to take the risk of being with a provider who engages in more than the acceptable level of unsafe practices.
While not a big item per se.. the extra big tip and gift... Why give these things to a girl that really could give two shits about you? It's a bad feeling to think otherwise. I understand you probably were just looking for some friendly extra attention. As far as the OTC lunch. I've found many providers don't like to tell you no and act interested. But when it comes close to the time of meeting, they check out/dont get back to you until its too late. I think alot don't like to say No to OTC offers (ie. Lunch, etc).
The BBFS thing sounds like that may just be in your head.
1) You could casually mention the extra stuff you gave provider #1, see if she gets the hint, and finally thanks you. But does it really matter? If so, you need to ask yourself what you really wanted. As in any other business transaction, if you don't get what you want in exchange for your payment, then find another provider.
2) Tell the girl you got the feeling she might be willing to do BBFS, and that this makes you uncomfortable. If she is smart, she will pick up on your discomfort and assure you that no absolutely not she was only joking she would never risk her health or yours. Then you will feel better and can go back to enjoying yourself like you used to. But you have no idea what she's really doing. Maybe she is ultra careful with customers, but fucks her boyfriend BB, and he in turn regularly fucks warty virus-infected sluts every time she goes off to work. If you like her, just wear the condom and quit overthinking shit.
Not to sure what the problems are, Lady #1 cut back on gifts and tips and give her just what she is asking for if you feel her level of service is dropping. Lady #2 just keeping grabbing for the condom everytime and if it happens that she tries to mount you in CG or RCG with out one stop her and insist on a condom. If you are creeped out by the fact that she does this with regualrs then move on to another lady that is not that reckless.
#1 Welcome to the world of thinking there is more than there is to the relationship. Though you state you didn't expect anything more than a thank you. It is disappointing when a simple courtesy is not forthcoming. If the sessions are what you want and expect, keep seeing her. She may actually be blase' about your tip/gift but will still provide a great session. On the other hand she may be trying to make sure you don't expect too much based on her reaction to your tip/gift so she kept it very low key. Personally unless there is something really special about this provider I'd be inclined to not see her anymore, but I would talk about my concern with her. I agree with the poster that said talk to the lady. You shouldn't have an emotional stake in how she responds. My guess is no matter what her response the experience has been tainted for you and you'll move on. If you do continue to see her just keep it in the moment. Don't dwell on the other stuff. As you said the expected donation and the proper etiquette during the session and nothing more.
#2 If you want to know about the offer of BBFS ask her. If she says she is offering it to you then you have a decision to make. Stop seeing her or continue and always be covered (as you say is your intent). You know she is doing it BB with someone. (Boyfriend, SO, maybe other clients) That is always the possibility with any provider you see. You can tell her your thoughts on the subject but it comes down to...see her and be covered or don't see her anymore.
I concur with the previous post. It's possible that provider #1 is also starting to feel something and knows better than you that "feelings" isn't good for this business so you both need to take a break. These girls are not robots and they can also get caught up in the fantasy. This is however the nature of the business to provide a fantasy experience. There are sooooo many lovely ladies out there why stop at one or two. If you need some immediate recommendations I can give you quite a few. As far as lady two is concerned I spoke with other providers about this and most have given me the same answer they understand the danger but love the feeling of BBFS. Therefore it is correct to assume that if she isn't doing that with you she is definitely seeking that out with someone else and satisfying that urge. As hard as it must be to stop seeing these ladies you should definitely try.
In general, one should only reward good behavior. In my humble opinion, equally important is to ask yourself if you did your part as a gentlemen that showed her a good time as well. If keeping a lasting provider/client friendship is important to you, try to make her laugh and make things a whole lot of fun for her too, so that she looks forward to seeing you again. If she's having fun with you and knows that you are interesting to be around, things will never get lack luster. One of my fav ladies and I always have something to laugh about, do silly things, but most of all have tons of fun together. Imho, it is important not to try and make up for this aspect through tipping.
Also, while I'm far from a guy who has a "calculating" personality, it does help to be a little, and I mean a little, calculating. I only tip if the girl showed me whats equivalent to a mindblowing session, if she put in the extra effort to remember things about me, communicates with genuine interest in what I say, and if there appeared to be something close to a good chemistry or compatibility. Save your money and only tip those who deserve it.
Come on man, I don't want to flog you. If you don't like what you're getting, move on. If the world doesn't offer you better, go back. If you're okay with it, tap it and pay the fare. And you know damn well the board is going to crap all over you for the way you describe risky behavior, you little masochist. You make me sick.
For provider #1: u r right, she did take u for granted. She needs to have humility and be appreciative of your gratitude. A simple thank u is all that is needed. I also have the same problem in the past. I use to wine and dine providers. After the first few incidents, they thank me and such. After a while, they have taken me for granted and expects that as a norm.
1 thing I have found out is. Its not about the money. Its about how they "feel". U might be belittling them b/c they think u buy those gifts out of necessity. Also, despite the gift, if u treat the providers how u want in the sack, that might be a dilemma despite the gift. They may also think that u have money, and do not think twice about ur luxurious gift to them. They may simply think to themselves, well, he is loaded, and what's a couple of pennies he spent on me makes, and may not think twice about thanking u for it. Or, with ur case, with the restaurant thing, she took advantage of u. My advice is: just c her for P4P, and nothing else. A provider with humility will appreciate even the simplest of gifts, and will thank u on all occasions. With provider #1 as u describe, she lacks these qualities.
With provider #2: this happens more than u might expect. I guess, she chose u specifically to do this. I don't know if she does that to most, but, don't quote me on this, when a provider wants BBFS, its not for every guy that she is with, its only for a selected few. Don't be alarm by it, it happens more frequently than one may think. Its ur call if u want BBFS. Otherwise, just cover up. Don't view her as any differently. She's only human, and sex is a natural process. However, if u r concerned about her actions, then its ur call to terminate the relationship.
First lady. Don't give her anything extra, tip or otherwise. I don't tip. Shit, you give them more money than you would a doctor or a lawyer per hour. And all three of them pretend to care about you. Know what I'm sayin'?
Seems you want some sort of acceptance cuz you were 'thoughtful' enough to give her extra money, or bought something she put on her site as 'appreciated but not expected'. My ass! They expect that fuckin' shit. That way they can pay the bills while we buy them those $500+ shoes they'll wear twice then sit in the closet with the other 200 pair they'll never wear again.
Wise the fuck up. Lick it, stick it, quit it. NEXT!...
Second lady. Of course she want's to go BB on you. You're you. You're the man! You give her extra shit, and you're wondering why she gives you 'that look'?
Where you wanted the acceptance from the first lady, you have it from the second. And now you're bitching about it. You wonder if she does that sort of thing with her other favorites. You know what they say about 'gut feelings'....?
I call bullshit. You did do BB with her and you will continue to cuz she's such a 'gem'.
Anyway, you're fucked dude. Good thing you wrote under an alias so the only one's that know who you are are the mods, and they ain't sayin' shit. It's in their contract.
I'm gonna write a thread about BBFS. Thanks for the inspiration!
One the one hand CF number one isn't enough like a GF and doesn't stroke his fragile ego enough to keep him feeling "special" OTOH CF number two is too much like a GF and wants to (in his mind at least) cross the boundaries of safety and common sense.
Like I said, you just can't please some people.
Doesn't matter if he spent 200 or 2000. He'll never be satisfied. Always has to pick shit apart, lol!
it sounds like you've got a narrow range of comfort and that's OK. it is your money and you should spend it where you have a working relationship that meets your requirements in terms of fun, appreciation and safety.
OTOH, wherever you go, there you are. if you can't find a lady in this business with whom you are comfortable, maybe consider your own attitude.
....every gentleman I visit with, gets a thank you e-mail, or phone call, depending on his preference for communication. This applies if, or if he does not provide an extra gift. As for visiting "off the clock", that is a slippery slope. Yes, I do meet a few of my ATF's for a cocktail if they are passing through my neighborhood, and yes, I may suggest a quick lunch before a date, but this courtesy is at at my discretion.
On the other hand, I have never, and will never offer BBFS! That, is called a death wish.
Hugs and Kisses
does tend to get you taken for granted. I've had it happen. I took a long break and honestly I did not know if I'd ever go back. When I did circle back, she seemed to be more inclinded to give her A game... but it has also been more business-like (which it is). You need to find more ladies... and more Favorites. I'm currently rotating 3 but am open to a new candidate if one strikes my fancy. I have tried a few but not hit another Favorite... yet.
As far as #2... you may be right. Providers are people too. Never the less, you have set your expectations. You might want to caution her about "mistakes"... She's undoubtably BBing her BF or SO. If you can't handle it, move on.
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Looks like he needs to broaden his list. Many women will take men that are always there for them for granted. The OP brings reliable business along with tips and expensive gifts, seldom have I seen ladies wish lists that are not chocked full of expensive gift desires.
I am a hobbysis that tips providers for good service, after the survice. I do that and don't expect appraciation from them. And they should not expect me to reliably show up. I maintain a list of four proven, top, travelling providers, I chose not to see two of them on their last visit. I will see one of the four the coming week ONLY because a new beauty that I was hoping to sample changed her schedule and the new beauty that was my second choice was not available when I wanted to visit with her. Even so, I will sample two new providers over the coming days along with a session with my fav.
Variety is spice in this business. It makes sense to go with proven providers for many reasons, but in cases where it is a good bet that a new provider will be golden, it's best to encounter with new faces and tastes. The OP is being taken from granted by number one because she knows that he won't explore new options and come around to her less frequently. The OP may or may not be offered BBFS by number two, I would have had to be in the room watching to see whether that was the case. Number two may simply be trying to show her appreciation, but the OP has gotten issues to the point to where a potentially clingy woman view him as a lifeline.
#1 It's important to increase the rewards to a woman when she does not reciprocate. If she her actions decline you should reward her even greater than before. That's what men are supposed to do.
#2 It's the goal of every hobbyist to wear away, through simple repeat business, a provider's desire to stay safe, and to finally have his cockskin connect directly with her vaginal walls. This is inherently biological, and to shrink away from it means not being a man. Ultimately you should deliver your seed to her wanton womb. That's what men are supposed to do.
You're overthinking this. Letting emotions get in the way. Lettig thought get in the way. You are supposed to keep giving money, gifts, material things while giving the cock. That is basically divine will or something like that.
If you're having conflicts you need to start drinking. Even drinking heavily. If that effects the cock, then get some ED meds, some jewelry (or whatever) and more cash.
Next time you're "looking at each other" just move the cock straight toward her womb. Don't stop unless she says no. Maybe even hold a diamond tennis bracelet in your teeth as you move your groin toward hers.
Just go ahead and he a man about it.