I'll go schmooze her, get her to marry me, and when the papers are signed and you don't have to pay her anymore, I'll dump her ass before the ink is dry. I'll tell her I have a thing for barnyard animals or some shit and she'll run screaming.

All I want in return is an overnight duo with two ladies of my choice.

The way I figure it's a high price to pay, but a hell of a lot cheaper than what you're paying now...!