Do most of the hobbyists here prefer to see one or a few women that they really enjoy on a regular basis, or see a new woman every time to maximize variety?
What are the pros and cons of seeing one or a couple women on a regular basis versus trying out a new woman every time?
My reason: we read repeatedly of guys on this board who get too enmeshed with a favorite provider. Violate boundaries. Learn hard lessons.
Others put up with substandard service and disrespect and don't know what to do about it.
MOST of them do not have enough experience under their belt to deal with these situations.
Get some experience, some variety, and you will learn how to set reasonable expectations with respect to service level and boundaries. This will enable you to better and perhaps more successfully enjoy a "regular" or two.
GTM, is right. I went awhile, different escort every time, then I found an atf. So now, I see the atf regularly and mix in new ladies. Newbs have to figure the hobby out. If you don't believe me read the The Erotic Highway board. The LG has a saying for a certain syndrome. "help I've fallen for an escort and can't get up" syndrome. The EH board has loads of posts about the topic
I cannot tell you how happy I am when I get reference request for any of the gents I see.....esp when the reference request is coming from a wide variety of completely different types of providers.
IMHO exclusivity is not what the hobby is about.
When I become aware of a guy who is only seeing me, I tend to start suggesting other ladies who I know are on the same level sexually as me, have around the same rates and availability, but who look completely different.
If all else fails, I will start doing doubles, or taking him to swing clubs....this is a hobby meant for fun, not meant for the drama and complications of someone getting a wee bit too much of an attachment to one person.
Dear Allure: I was wondering how do you know when it is time to terminate a relationship with a client? How do you know when the relationship is becoming dangerous in terms of the attraction and it becoming more emotional versus a business like relationship? What psychological sign and indicator do you look for in the demeanor of the client during this time? Discuss his ability to compartmentalize versus they way he might misinterpret certain ways that you might interact with him.
I agree with most above, variety is what the hobby is about. BUT...on more than one occasion I've rang up an ATF for a repeat performance because I needed the comfort level, didn't want to bother with verification, or it was short notice and she was willing to fit me in (pardon the pun) without getting offended at the last minute call.
I will digress for a story...trying to make a connecting flight at a major US city, delayed on my original departure by snow so was going to miss the connecting flight resulting in a 4 hour layover. Called an ATF in the connection city, she graciously got a room, met me at the airport, drove me to the hotel, rocked my world, then drove me back in time for the connecting flight...she even made a big curb side show of how much her and the kids would miss me while I was gone!!!!
A girl I was meeting for the first time would never do that for me, so there is room for both repeats and variety in the hobby after all!!!!
I'm a regular kind of guy, but still have not found one in my area where the schedules mesh on a routine basis, of course I live in the boonies so that does not help at all.
When I travel it ends up being variety by default, but I would like to find regulars in the cities I travel to a few times a year. But scheduling has been an issue so far.
As a relative newbie, I'm not sure I should comment, but. . . I think that the advice of trying for variety at first is a very good one. I, for one, had no idea of what expetactions were or were not reasonable. "I've fallen for a provider and can't get up" is a very real danger; in fact, that's sort of where I am right now. But I think the fact that this is the sixth provider I have seen gives me at least some perspective on my own feelings and actions, and also as to the general "customs" of how the hobby operates. I also think what drives many hobbyists is a drive for change or variety. But, every hobbyist is different, and has his own set of needs/motives, and "if it ain't broke, don't fix it" is sometimes a good idea.
I really recommend the Newbie Board. It's filled with good information.
I love both....I have a few regulars I adore who are funny and we always have a good time and me being a creature of habit a little bit I like the familiarity in regulars but I love seeing different guys for the first time. I sort of want to think it's the same on the hobbyists end...most like variety here and there but usually they come to me.
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