I was on business trip with one of my collegues this week. We have traveled together quite a lot. She is 35 and quite hot looking. Talks sexy. We always have a great time and spend hours after 5 while traveling together. We were drinking in the bar at out hotel and this time, we got a bit too drunk and started talking about our sex life (we are both married) and she told me her dream sex which is 3some (MMF/MFF) and Greek. I jokingly offered her a Greek experience and she said "Let's go!".
So we went up to her room and as soon as we closed the door, we were at it as if tomorrow might not come. No juicy details here as this is not a place for review but we fucked for a few hours, non stop. After some "normal" positions, gave her the first Greek exp. She loved it and I came hard in there. The following night, it got hotter and I slept with my Mr Happy in her back door!
Had a great time but feel guilty. There wil be another trip with her in two weeks and I kind of feel I must stop it at some point.
Has any hobbyist gotten into a similar situation?
By the way, do not ask me who had condoms on business trip
As long as neither of you cross the love line, then have at it... I hope she is not junior to you because that might spell another kind of trouble. As far as the back door, you are not her first or last. And sure, I'd bet she carries condoms all the time, because she is a freak. What's your guilt about?
I didn't bring it up and just made a comment to Hands Free.. What is your problem?? Dead thread to me and why are you reading my post.. I don't read your..
I can't say I would have done any better under the same circumstances, but you (as you well know) just lit the fuse on a bomb.
The best possible thing that could happen now, however unlikely, is to mutually decide it is was fun but now that you've gotten it out of your system it can never happen again. If you're lucky that will be the end of it.
If you continue you're almost certain to be discovered by one or both of your spouses which would likely ruin one or both marriages. I would think your jobs would also be at risk if this were to become public. And finally you run the risk of falling for each other (the grass is always greener... blah blah blah) if you haven't already.
I know what you've experienced is every guys fantasy; but now that you've sobered up you must realize it's putting your entire lives at risk, and would deeply hurt your families. If you recognize all of this and continue the affair then I'd hate to be you looking in the mirror.
That's the main benefit of hobbying to begin with, no strings, no serious emotional attachments and assured discretion. Stick with the pros.
maybe not getting paid for it, but his biggest problem is that he works with her. She'd fuck you too if your were her type and was available when she is on the road. No married woman carries condoms if she doesn't want to get laid somewhere's else. Sheesh.
I do not believe we have any emotional attachment. Well, at least, I dont. I just find her extreme;y attractive as a woman. Am not sure what she had in her mind as we didnt talk about it. We just had a blast in bed.
Well, I have seen quite a few posts here about some hobbyists falling for their ATF. This danger exists with anyone - Civvies and Pros. One major difference I see is in the case of Pros, I can walk away when I find myself at risk.
By the way, I was the one who had the condoms. I always have some on the road. Just in case I want to see some pro in the area.
Nothing like having a walmart nearby to get the bottle water, condoms, astroglide, and other things needed for play. First thing I do when I get in town.
Fate played you great hand. As long as you don't get goofy on each another you two can become the fudge fluming dynamic duo; increasing profits for the company with an ever eager Can-Do spirit.
it's "safe" sex for the two of you. You're both away from home, in possibly unfamiliar surroundings. Nobody will know you, so it's a secret between the two of you. You may want to consider letting her take the lead. Whether or not you two do anything together must be by mutual consent. If she says something along the lines of now that her one dream has been realized, she wants to have you help fulfill the other, check her for a provider. Whatever you do, KEEP IT AWAY FROM HOME.
so guilt is something that you left long ago. Worried about what it will do to your marriage? Ditto.
So fuck her hard and often (as long as she wants it too) and help her live out each one of her fantasies. The fact that she carried condoms means it was just a matter of time if she hadn't cheated on her husband before.
Play wisely - don't play on your home turf. Otherwise, its free and its good - where is the bad here?
the bad news might not come, but if it does, it might come in the form of manipulation at work, or her talking to other friends about it, or her wanting to become a SO. A lot of american women will use what they have to get what they want. Sometimes a woman will sleep with a guy and pressure him to marry her. You have to consider these things and it depends on the personality of the female, but you really never know for sure.
Maybe there's others like me who don't have much if any guilt concerning the hobby. But when it's in the civvie world there's too many chances for feelings to get involved and maybe that was the subliminal messgae there. It sounds like he's already fairly good friends with that lady. He may feel guilty for crossing that line with her and jeopardizing a friendship. Or maybe those feelings of guilt are there because he does feel something for her and his definition of cheating is not JUSt the act of sex but the feelings that go with it. feelings he only has with her and not within the hobby.
you gave her her first greek experience, and then she slept with it in her backdoor the next night? either a quick learner or she's done it before (especially if she had the condoms)
though, there are a few things you didn't say in your post, that I would like to inquire about.
You Hobby, so the issue of guilt about infidelity shouldn't be an issue, unless to your mind this is somehow different.
If this is different to you, why? Because you do see her at work? Because you travel together on a somewhat regular basis? Because perhaps you feel something more for her than you "should"? Because you think she feels more for you? Because you feel this may turn into a full on affair, and not just fun on the road? Because it meant more, or represented something that the infidelity within the hobby doesn't?
Seems to me, you feel guilty for a reason, whether you fully understand that reason or not. Your conscience is telling you something, and you would probably be wise to listen to it. If you think it will have to stop eventually, stopping now is probably the best idea, because when the time comes that it NEEDS to stop you might not be able to stop...and then it's too late. By the time it has to stop, whatever you think it could become, whatever you are feeling guilty about will have already happened to the extent that people can and will be hurt by it, either you and this lady, your spouses, or all four.
I also can't help but wonder about her motivation for telling you her "dream sex" and taking you up on your offer...also interesting that her "dream sex" coincides quite well with the fantasies of a great majority of men (the FMF threesome and Greek at least). Almost seems she set for you a tender trap...as to if you really were her first Greek experience...I don't know, but first time, no lube (I assume no lube since unless either you or she were planning this doubt it would have been brought along), and was used to it enough by the next night you could sleep inside the backdoor? I guess it might have been her first time...maybe. _________________________________________________
I do have a question for the other folks that are responding to this thread...
Where are so many of you getting that she had condoms? I read QUOTE: "By the way, do not ask me who had condoms on business trip"
To my mind that could be read as she brought condoms. It could be read as he brought condoms, perhaps in the hopes this would happen (which could explain a bit of his guilt). It can also be read as 'don't ask because neither of us had them and we did this bareback' (this being the one I assumed when I read the post).
what the hell it is talking about. A lot of times it acts like it spends all day reading the NY Post and watching Fox News.
Listen to all parts of the body. The big head and the little head, the stomach and the heart. Then decide. If they don't tell you to cultivate this thing, get a new body.
I DO feel guilty about being in this hobby but that doesnt stop me. I can always walk away when needed and there will be no trace of my hobbying history (I hope!). The situation I just got in is different as some members pointed out. It could be much more complicated and dangerous to both parties.
My feeling is actually "regret" rather than "guilt".
Here is my answer to your in-depth questions:
Because you do see her at work? - YES Because you travel together on a somewhat regular basis? - YES Because perhaps you feel something more for her than you "should"? - NO Because you think she feels more for you? - NO Because you feel this may turn into a full on affair, and not just fun on the road? - NO Because it meant more, or represented something that the infidelity within the hobby doesn't? - NO
Imagine that you would travel and spend a night or two with someone you've had sex with quite often. There was a reason why you had sex with her in the first place and that reason still exists...
Like I said in the original, I didnt want to bring up all the juicy details but here is my answer to the last part of your post:
I had condoms. She asked me "wHY??" and I told her it was a lfet over from the last vacation I had with my wife. No, I didnt have a KY (not prepared that much!) so we used a lotion (!) but as you can imagine, it was hard to get in there with it. After a long meeting the folowing day, she bought a small bottle of KY for that night.
NO, I didnt sleep with my Mr Happy in her ass!!! I was joking!
I know what needs to be done. I was just asking if anyone else here has had a similar exp.
You might be able to make this work if the company is large enough that the two of you can be some employee numbers rather than "Dick" and "Jane" in a small company with say 5-10 employees. It is all about risk vs reward. Good luck!
in big companies with employee numbers it is possible to see her often. He has opened up a pandora's box, I will not venture a guess as to where it will lead.
i always appreciate posts from older people, always wonder what i might be thinking years from now on current, past and future events. I have good conservative parents who have been involved with the church. I probably wouldn't be able to turn down his coworker's offer, but I don't think I'd be proudly talking about it either. I don't think I'll be saying 'oh yes' in my mind while sitting in my rocker. I'll probably be thinking of it as something I had to do to learn about life. ...but of course I can't be sure.
The one thing which seems to be missing in all of the responses I've read so far is this; you need to talk to HER and find out what she has in mind. Once you know THAT, then you will be in a much better place to figure out how to procede. If you want it to end, talk to her and tell her. If you think that fucking on the road together is fun and you want it to contiune, see what she thinks, and if she is game, go for it.
Most importantly, remember what we say in the Rock and Roll touring business; what happens on the road STAYS on the road. I can't tell you how many married or seriously involved guys in my business end up spending a night or two with a local female stage hand, or a woman on the tour. But you NEVER tell anyone about it when you get home. Not even other stage hands.
So, take her to lunch and talk to her about it. Or wait until you are on the plane for your next business trip. But talk about it at the first possible opportunity, and get the confusion out of the way. With any luck, you both still have an emotional commitment to your marrage that will keep you away from one another when you are at home, and you may not need to pay for providers when you are on the road anymore, which can't be all bad.
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