So here's an experience I had recently I'd like to share.

I met a provider (has all positive reviews, but only a few) yesterday at her hotel. Since it was a small hotel in downtown, she had to come get me. I'm waiting and waiting, and she comes from another side telling me she had to pick something up before the date. And she seemed to have been bothered by something and running around. When went upstairs and she was telling me about something that day with another provider that had annoyed her and yada yada yada.

Anyway, we get up to the room. Chit chat for a bit with a drink before I ask to use the restroom. I always do this to take a shower right before the session, as I like to be hygienic about these things. Since I figured, she had been running around for a while, I politely asked if she would like to join me for a shower. I actually wanted her to shower and clean down there, as I was planning on some DATY.She politely declined saying she had taken a shower a few hours ago. Ok, fine, she seemed decently clean and groomed.

So, we get started, and my assumptions come true. Despite being clean everywhere else, I can smell the stench from her snatch. I still braved it and made it down there, but after two tastes I wasn't able to take it anymore. I played it off and came back up. It was pretty bad down there. I'm not saying she was a dirty girl or anything. Its just it smelled like cooked urine and sweet, pretty much what happens if you don't shower for a day. You may be like...Duh... its supposed to taste like that, and I have seen girls with a light taste like that. Most of the girls I have seen are very clean, they usually shower before. Sometimes you still have to go to the bathroom even after showering, and that causes a weak smell. But that can't create the cooked stench that I experienced. Anatomically speaking, I think that females need to be cleaner than men in order to receive oral. To be explicit, a guy can piss all day, and just his tip tastes like piss, whereas for a girl, everything down there tastes like piss. Despite that, I personally make it a point to be clean and groomed for every date. I carry mouthwash in my car and use it before heading in. And inside I make it a point to shower there too.

The bottom line is, I wanted to ask this girl to go take a shower and clean up, but I didn't know how. I know many providers require gents to shower at there place, can the gents make it a requirement too? Ladies, if this was you, how would you suggest the guy to politely ask you to take a shower? Any suggestions from the guys?

Thanks for the help!

Just ask her. Say you have a thing about wanting a woman to be fresh out of the shower to perform oral. If she refuses, then don't DATY and don't see her again. As far as your comment that women need to be cleaner for oral and a guy can piss all day and just his tip tastes like piss....Do you know this from experience????  Because as someone that has given a bj or two in my time, you couldn't be more wrong. Why do you think so many women have on their websites to please be clean???? It's because many of you have sweaty ball syndrome...smelly ass...stinky tip....not even from not showering but sweat tends to accumulate down there. Trust me. I know.

thanks for your helpful comments meow baby.

My comment was just my hypothesis. I saw a provider once that used baby wipes on me before going down. I guess this is possible and effective with the men, but not so much women.

Regardless, I do stand corrected. It is important for both parties to be freshly showered and clean. I couldn't agree with you more on that.

Cheers!

Never truer words spoken.

Personally I do not shower with clients I have only just met. It's just too intimate. I know that sounds ludicrous considering what I do allow, but I wouldn't be surprised if I'm not alone in this particular idiosyncrasy. -e

Not that I wouldn't respect your feelings about it, but a shower together after can be great fun!

I don't even know where to begin with this...

1. your posting seems to assert that women are more inherently susceptable to tasting like piss/being unclean.

Are you sure you like women? I think you need to get a reality check here.

There are plenty of women that are clean, don't smell, don't taste like piss and shower regularly.
Men have the SAME problems with odor that women do despite them having a shaft and a tip rather than the indoor plumbing, so to speak, that women have.

This is easily solved. Shower, use baby wipes, deoderizers, douche, whatever...

2. I don't understand why you would go through with it if she was unclean. I don't get men who think of a woman as good enough to fuck despite the smell, but not to DATY.

If she smells, why go through with any of it? Why not bail out and get another provider?

Your post is full of assumptions, though, which I feel you are unqualified to make. I also think it's a bit mysogynistic when describing the male ability to piss all day and not smell (not true, btw...) and the female ability to basically wallow in our own filth as it sounds.

All this talk about smelling like piss, and wallowing in your own filth; I dunno, somehow it's getting me excited.

But seriously, it is funny to assume that sweating, pissing, etc are inherently different depending on whether you're an inny or an outy.

To suggest women are inherently unclean because of an innie is just pure ignorance.

Katie

Grow some and ask for what you want or be willing to leave. We are way to weak kneed when it comes to being frank with one another. If you smell less than fresh, there has to be a conversation. If either of you disagree, it's time to walk (run if he or she is totally dank). Believe me, if you begin to date the many quality ladies in this biz, you'll not have this issue ever... A few bad reviews = a trend.

P.S. You went way around the block in order to be nice when you would have had to make very few excuses for her behavior and called it out for what it was. I agree with Katie, it's a bit presumptive and I think you will find that most providers would find this plea to fall on deaf ears.

He is just ignorant!

I wish you would write a review so I can avoid her.
Honestly, you are clueless in regards to your assumptions about male vs. female hygiene but that doesn't excuse her lack of cooperation in wanting to be clean for your date. I would have walked. I don't see the date going well if you have to demand that she shower anyway.

from the back that is, but HOT nonethless!

wow! we might have to chat privately

Great post!

More often then I care to admit; I am confronted with salty balls-
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HtHMUiHptcY

Just for some comedic relief, LOL!

Seriously, I can not believe you went thru with that appointment!  Yuck!  More man than I am- guess that’s not saying much but my hat is off to you.  Body odor has got to be the worst part of hobbying- at least for me.  I think the main issue is that most men have never had to have their head anywhere near another man’s genitals, so they don’t understand how completely rancid it can get.  Take it from me; things get ripe quickly down there!  The urine issue is the same for both sexes; it tends to drip everywhere and ferment.  Not a nice smell.  Let’s not get into the odors and issues that creep from the other end…oh my!

I have an entire page devoted to one of my all-time hallowed standard: hygiene.  From observation I have decided that mostly good personal hygiene is a learned behavior.  For the most part, if you don’t pick it up as a kid it doesn’t come easy or even occur to most folks.  The area in question needs to be scrubbed (for Pete’s sake- USE the washcloth given to you).  Not rubbed with a bar of soap, not brushed over with a bath sponge, or don’t let the water beat the filth off of your cranky ass- it has to be scrubbed off!  If you don’t shave- the hair will soak up that smell- whatever “that” smell may be.  For you non-smokers, consider this:  remember when there used to be smoking in bars?  You’d go out for drinks with friends and the next morning and your coat/hair/everything would radiate that terrible smell?  Now imagine if you stuck your hair in a bag full of cigarette butts, added some liquid and heat?  I think you get the point.

If I were you, pure_playuh, I would look for the tell-tell signs of a freshly showered gal, namely that pleasant, fresh-from-the-shower aroma.  If it isn’t there, invent some story about having a shower fantasy to get the girl in the shower.  Understand she probably won’t want to get her hair wet- so do something nice like offer to help her put her hair up.  Some good, “clean” providers may still resist- personal preference after all but most I would imagine would go along with it.

XO
Melanie

-- Modified on 12/19/2007 6:18:59 PM

I had an appointment recently that I should have run away from the moment I spied the ebode. Aside from the fact that it was certainly not upscale, the client looked and smelled like he hadn't bathed in days. I don't blame him as he has a debilitating muscular disease and has a distinct inability to get around, but damn. However, he is a nice guy and I felt as if turning around at that point would have been bad form, and worse, hurt his feelings. The place smelled like fresh urine and (having had to literally end the appointment at an hour - with the appropriate discount, of course) it felt like a bad rewind of that B.O. Seinfeld episode. Even after having showered I can still smell it. Thank God Almighty he didn't require kissing or bbbj. I haven't heaved in awhile but today was a good candidate. Note to self: When you feel the need to take off jewelry in order to conform to the environment, it might be a good time to reconsider. -e

As far as taking a shower with a client....I know this sounds weird but I won't shower with them unless they're regulars. On another note, it may not be the most comfortable place for 'fun' for my clients as I'm a leggy 4'11" LOL.

Few years ago, I had many dates with one of the most prolific reviewers of all boards (now retired from the hobby).

When he made his appointments, he was very clear about his basic requirement - the girl in question had to be very clean, with her body smelling like Dove soap and her hair shampooed and still wet upon his arrival. He didn't want any makeup or perfume or fancy lingerie.

I knew he had an issue with BO, smelly pussies & asses, reason of his request - but he asked the girls in a charming way and they never refused, greeting him just wrapped in a bath towel with the hair still dripping.

If the girl was smart and granted his wish, he tipped generously at the end of the session and she gained a faithful client.

So....

If you want a girl to be freshly showered, make a point to mention when you book with her - for her not to be offended, just say is your FETISH, you get turned on a lot by the smell of Dove soap & Pantene shampoo.

That's what I do - when I ask my boys to hit the shower soon they walk in for an appointment, I just drool all over their bodies, stick my tongue in their mouths and whisper on their ears how turn on I get when they smell like ----> Dove! They get excited and run to the bathroom!

Use reversed psychology, it works!



-- Modified on 12/19/2007 7:48:53 PM

Well it is 99.9% pure ...

Of course, that may not fly with obsessive compulsive statisticians - even with the standard deviation. -e

(Just having some fun, Candy.)

I have a client with the softest pubic hair ever.

When he gets out of the shower and is drying his body, his cock hangs down, semi hard - oh I can't resist! I have to get down on my knees to bury my nose in his hairy groin to inhale his fresh smell.

Such a turn on! It makes me so horny for him.



-- Modified on 12/19/2007 8:14:58 PM

and it's 99-44/100ths percent pure.

Doh! You are correct. It's been awhile since I've seen China Blue. -e

I'm kidding, but really, I was horny..

A click on that link fixed my problem though, thanks!

hehe... great posts guys.
Thanks for all the advice.

I think its definitely a better idea to use the shower fetish story before straight up asking her to take a shower. Very creative and can add to the experience! And, although I've never done it before, I  guess if all else fails, get up and leave.

I understand this goes both ways and I sympathize with the ladies that have to put up with this on a regular basis. That's why most providers ask men to arrive fresh and clean and have specific etiquette on their websites. If they don't, the ladies can always ask them to leave.

I think the reason this happened is that I've always thought that the 'balance of power' was tipped toward the provider, as she usually sets the rules. But you guys are right - both parties involved should be able to have requirements. Just gotta be polite when asking! It certainly makes for a better experience.

Thanks again for all the help!

Your posts are always fun to read I love redheads come visit LA ;p

Well, I take the equivilant of two (2) showers before I see any provider. It's not the shower you take after work thats half cleaning half relaxing, I make sure its perfect .

Although, I find due to the fact I'm overweight, despite my freshly showered scent, women assume, I'm going to be dirtier than someone who is a bit thinner (because I've been with skinny and overweight GIRLS and the bigger girls can be cleaner sometimes, because they have to try harder .. so I dont think the generalization should be used on either sex.), that's really my pet peeve. But that is a discrimination that goes along with the choice to be overweight (trying to lose but it aint easy.. )

Funny though, when a girl loves you she'll go down on you after a hard days work, now that's love baby.

Im going on and on, but yeah, I think the provider should have the respect for the hobbyist, and either party should be able to 'opt out' for hygeine reasons.

The hobbyist is going to feel pressure to make it work though,(50 minute drive.. long day at work .. being horny.. )

because -- after my experiment of sending call girls away (over 30 in one night..) after calling them in Vegas, I can tell you they don't like it(even if its their fault because their hideous..) ...yes it was evil. By the way that experience was what shyed me away from traditional escorts/call girls/whatever. How things have changed in 10 years.

-m

thanks for your response katie!

I'm pretty sure that "There are plenty of women that are clean, don't smell, don't taste like piss and shower regularly". In fact I happen to know many of them. Nowhere in my post did I state or assume that all women are inherently unclean, nor did I say that men can piss all day and not smell. Perhaps you misread my post and would like to read it again.

Also, to answer your question. I don't think I'd go to see women if I hated them or was a misogynist. If you hated dogs, would you spend money to go see them? Perhaps, you need a reality check here.

However, I do appreciate your comments - thanks again!

Thanks!

Katie

Lord have mercy, you truly are women of god. Although, this is a confidence booster for women NOT being repulsed by my averageness. Thank you. You all are doing the lords' work though

much respect

-m

No one generalized about all woman not taking shower. He was talking about 1 provider he had experienced recently and you made a huge generalization. This is how dramas are made and unnecessary back and forth starts.

As an adult one should know when one needs a shower or not. In this instance, this person did not know she needed one. Been with many providers, whenever any of them ask me take shower, I take one, whenever I know I need one, especially after work, I take one and I don't think the asking for the same courtesy is not too much to ask.

Agreed. Weak in the knees is correct. We put up with fake pictures, bait and switch, blah..blah...blah.

It is like any other product, you don't what you are paying for don't buy it.

Walk away!

there have been other hygiene threads recently, but this one brings me much glee because several ladies stepped up and verbalized the stuff that my girl friends and always talk about AFTER the guy leaves... ie the foul aromas wafting up while going down, but NEVER say to his face.  My own hygiene is bordering on neurotic, so I've never known how to nicely ask men to better take care of their own...

Here's the clincher for all you men out there- I think some of you are just washing the FRONT of your dick and balls and expecting gravity to get soap and water into all the nooks and crannies.  This is a critical error- you need to lift the balls up and get around and underneath and also between your cheeks. If you're more heavy set, getting under the belly area and around the upper thigh area may be necessary as well.

My ex boyfriend was an absolute JERK, but in the three years we were together I could go down on him right after he had been out MOWING the freaking lawn and he would always smell good.  I think this is because, like me, he washed facetiously in the shower and also tidied up with  baby wipes and warm wash clothes.

Believe me, girls will give far more enthusiastic blow jobs if they aren't concentrating on breathing in through their mouths to avoid catching a whiff! ha.