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That was cool, John, and I'll elaborate from my own experience, thoughts, and ideasteeth_smile
MP67 11 Reviews 268 reads
posted

I don't believe in guilt, regret, or jealousy.

You might be with the hottest lady on the planet. But I'll get her eventually.

And when I get her, and decide I want to fuck another? I won't lose a wink of sleep when I do.

Now, I'm not saying this WILL happen. I'm just saying it's a distinct possibility.

HOWEVER, I am privy to a few ladies that I would be solo with. Meaning, they can still provide, and I'd hobby, of course, but when we lay our heads down at night, it's just me and her.

Actually, there's the ONE. She knows who she is, and there's a few here that know as well.... ;)

bluedragon061652 reads

This is the first time I've posted here, and I have found many of the discussions useful. I read about a fellow hobbyist that dated a Korean provider. As one dude said talking about The Game, I too dated an Asian provider, the problem was that I was falling for her and knew that this relationship wouldn't work, for one thing she doesn't speak English that well and I do not speak Thai at all with the exception of a couple of words, not enough to have a meaningful conversation. We did go out for dinner or lunch, to the store etc. We would take turns paying for the food, I took her to the Buddhist Temple first time for me. The issue with me was as enchanting as she was, we couldn't truly communicate the electronic translators are not as good as you would think, she wanted to marry me to be able to stay in this country and go back to Thailand and come back, I understand these girls do this to send money back home for there families, she wanted to continue doing this for a year or more and then she would be my loyal wife and start a family with me, this is what she told me, I told her my problem is I can not marry unless there is love, marriage of convenience is not something I care for. I feel stupid saying this but I do have real feelings for this one, she does not have the same feelings for me. I ended the relationship but feel terrible inside like when you brake-up with your GF. Any advice or words of encouragement?

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MarkusKetterman555 reads

but you were apparently not born stupid, and you surived Darwin this time.

Pat yourself on the back, put it behind you, and go out and get some really nice pussy to console yourself.

You done good.

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OSP446 reads

The 'big red flag' is that she wants an awful lot very quickly.

Glad you bailed. As for the 'broken' feeling, don't have any advice other than 'time wounds all heals'. Did I say that right? lol


Life sucks, then you die. :-(

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Tamara G296 reads

Related Link: http://thetamarag.wordpress.com

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bluedragon06303 reads

Yes thank God for that.

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mattradd429 reads

negative feelings; bad, sad, terrible, lonely, etc.

You made the right choice!

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shudaknownbetter386 reads

I've not dated a provider but I've fallen for 1 or 2...  it's very easy to fall for someone you have great sex with.  It's hormonal but we're (sometimes) beyond the cave man era.  
You are honestly conflicted & yes, it happens all the time.  However, you did the right thing.  You must think with the big head as well as the little one.  
BTW,
She might really mean it...  or it might be a case of get the green card, divorce & move on (for her).  There is way too much risk to give your heart.  What it hurts now is nothing compared to having been used for an ATM / passport.
You will heal.  
skb

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bluedragon06372 reads

Thanks to all for your words, I know I will get over it and move on, the feeling of wanting for this to work will fade away and I will be back business as usual. I must say I was close to see it threw and who knows what the horrible consequences would've been. I feel I did the right thing and am glad my fellow hobbyist feel the same way, again thank you all for your words.

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GaGambler268 reads

That's the beauty of the hobby, you don't have to wallow in self pity when a relationship goes bad. I am sure you will find someone who will make you forget all about this one, or will at least dull the pain until she becomes a distant memory.

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MP67237 reads

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MP67304 reads

For one, you were right to break it off. She might've been the best fuck of your life, but if you don't love her? What's the point?

You can find THOUSANDS of ladies here that will fuck the taste out of your mouth! Give them an envelope, and they're gone.

Don't get me wrong. I can appreciate meeting someone and want to spend the rest of my life with them.

But YOU have to want to do that. Don't let her dictate what you're going to do with the rest of your life.

Having feelings for providers I can totally understand. Some I tell them I love them, and they say it back.

I do. We do. So fucking what? Two people can't tell each other they love each other?

I love a LOT of people. Some are sweating it right now, hoping I don't out their names! ;)

My point is, do what you got to do. There's only one person on this God forsaken mudball you have to answer to. And that's YOU!!!

Peace! ;)

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JennaPurrLatte340 reads

you dont have to feel bad unlesss you want to.

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johngaltnh305 reads

If you think about it, you see a lot of cynicism -- usually using an alias which is fine -- from hobbyists and providers alike.

As one psychiatric journal described: "Irony and Cynicism are understood to be defense mechanisms. ... Cynicism has already been shown in its historical development to be a form of denial with the purpose to minimize the importance of the object."

IMO, cynicism is a reaction to painful disappointments, unmet expectations and rejections.

Life is full of these. Certainly the world of civie romance is full of these. By the time someone gets around to hobbying or providing; s/he may already have had a full complement of pain. Certainly, the guy isn't in the hobby to experience any more pain than he already has, so a cynical attitude serves as a defense mechanism.

It is my theory that the more cynical the hobbyist; the more sensitive he really is. His cynicism serves as a shield against disappointment and rejection.

But the sheer pervasiveness of cynicism among hobbyists is in and of itself proof of a rich and quite intense emotional life.

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MP67269 reads

I don't believe in guilt, regret, or jealousy.

You might be with the hottest lady on the planet. But I'll get her eventually.

And when I get her, and decide I want to fuck another? I won't lose a wink of sleep when I do.

Now, I'm not saying this WILL happen. I'm just saying it's a distinct possibility.

HOWEVER, I am privy to a few ladies that I would be solo with. Meaning, they can still provide, and I'd hobby, of course, but when we lay our heads down at night, it's just me and her.

Actually, there's the ONE. She knows who she is, and there's a few here that know as well.... ;)

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johngaltnh297 reads

Ah, yes, and let me agree.

Though I do not tell providers the "I love you" thing; I have and will tell them *what I love about them*.

And, you know what? As long as it is consensual, whatever you've got going on with a provider is fine and you don't need anyone else's approval!

Except, I WILL say that if you get your hands on the lady I saw most recently; you might be too cross-eyed for a week or so to dial anyone else's number. She epitomizes excellence.

:-)

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bluedragon06236 reads

Your analogy is true, I suppose I am guilty as charge, I think its human nature to want that special connection and granted she is a provider which can make a relationship that much harder our expectations seems to be too difficult to achieve. Don't get me wrong I have been in the hobby for a few years and seen many wonderful providers and had my share with some not so great ones. I just felt something different with this one and it wasn't sexual, its hard to explain. I am wise enough to not get myself in a trap, and for all to know I did get to see a couple of great providers that took my mind off of this one. Again I can not say enough on how much I appreciate the words you all are saying. Thank you again to all my fellow hobbyist.

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bballs281 reads

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bluedragon06242 reads

Why?

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