In a altruistic fashion this hobbyist approached a provider in a chat room on the topic of reviews that was presently being discussed at the time. I asked her why there was no reviews of her? Since she required multiple references of myself and other clients I thought if was a very fair and honest question. Her reply was very defensive that we gents brag and do not tell the truth. Some gents use the reviews system to bargain a lower price for a 10.0 review. That we go into intimate details in reviews, and intimate details in the bedroom should be left out. This is her belief system about such details. Some providers do not wish those details given. Here web site shows a very lovely and hot lady who I would think would want to confirm that she is a good provider. I would think hobbyist would love to honor her with good reviews if they had some input. She is ,in essence, a catch 22 of her own doing. Newbies know about that with no references they must find a trusting provider. Without reviews for any prolong period of time it can bring on doubt and even rumor within the community and that leads to a decrease in her market share. There is a lot of competition that has positive reviews and are established already. In talking to others hobbyist and in researching the concept of utilizing the reviews more than half of a surveyed hobbyist read and make decisions based somewhat on reviews. Indeed most web sites instruct newbies to read and study the reviews before making a selection. Old hands say to avoid any provider that does not have a review.
Reviews most be taken with grain of salt in that there is always some bragging going on. What I look for in a review is some qualities of on time, care for the client, affectionate, a good chemistry with the client and the narrative content. Here at TER the writing style must have spicy details while others sites do not require that. That is the rules of this site. I do prefer a style which is a more free and open style.  A review has to written consistent to the style of the site. Where you write the review is personal choice.  The point system that some reviews have bothers some ladies. How do you separate a 9.3 from a 9.8? Consistency in the reviews is something that is a plus for a provider. On one site I saw a provider with 10 reviews all positive. That would sway a decision for me. The idea of using a review to influence a new provider to lower her price and you will write that 10.0 review in trade is unethical! This is selling every other hobbyist out.

How to write a review. We are not all gifted writers and work for a well known publication but we can put some effort in giving some effort into a well written review. If your review is going to be a positive one you might want to ask her as you are leaving if she would like a review written to see her reaction. I would not do this upon entry to the meeting. You might want to general discuss content as to intimate details to see how sensitive she is to this. Blatant reviews are not welcomed by some providers. I have been told this by them they would rather do this by back channel sources. If she is you can try to adjust your writing to fit her request as much as possible but remember this is your review of her. Try to be respectful at all times to her wishes as she has to be of yours. It is a two edged sword here. I have seen in studying a reviews that reviews written by  a reviewer who was on the East Coast with a high dollar provider and then with a high dollar provider the next day on the West Coast reviewing two ladies there. With the recent survey done by TER I find that probable but unlikely. Again here you mileage may vary.

Reviews are the hobbyist consumer reports. With the amount of money that is to be exchanged, the risked taken there has to be a system of checks and balances. The reviews and reference system is there. It is a fair system. Reviews help providers gain other clients, and protect hobbyist from providers who are not ethical in their treatment of us.  There are hobbyist who are not ethical in many ways also! The reviews system is here to stay and if you do not have them get them or doubt will incur within the community. I encourage every hobbyist to write a review. That is my nickel. What is yours?

I agree that reviews are the Consumers Report of our industry. I might get "slammed" for my comments because I am about to expose one of our indutry's "dirty little secrets".

You said: Some gents use the reviews system to bargain a lower price for a 10.0 review.

Reply: That "Blackmail" (I cant think of a better word) goes both ways.

1. I have long suspected that some clients try to "blackmail" providers for positive reviews...Yet another reason some ladies do not like to be reviewed. I know of one "top" provider (on another board) who refuses to be reviewed. Most of us cant do that though. She is "stunning" and her website and photos bring the clients in...even though she does not have ONE review ANYWHERE.

But on the other hand...

2. A lot of ladies DEMAND reviews of their clients (fortunately 90% of them are on that "OTHER" review board). I hear one famous top provider "bugs" her clients for a review from the second he walks in the door until the second he leaves. She has something like 40+ reviews on that "Other" Board. It is also said that if the guy "forgets" to write the review for her she will continuously email him until he does.

I think that is WRONG! The review should come from his own desire to write it, not be "bugged" into doing it.

You said: Her reply was very defensive that we gents brag and do not tell the truth.

Reply: We've had a number of debates on "explicit" reviews on this board before. There has been no real progress. Some ladies DONT like reivews (especially explicit reviews) for many personal reasons. I agree that when a review is "positive" the ladies dont complain, when they are "negative" or "Inaccurate" the ladies get angry (and rightfully so). I dont know what the answer to that is.

You said: Old hands say to avoid any provider that does not have a review.

Reply: Okay...but if you avoid her how will she ever get a review? Someone has to take one for the team!

Also in my illustration above, some "top" providers do not want reviews...yet they still get clients even with the lack of reviews.

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You also have "poor girls" like myself who have alot of frustrations about reviews. I live in Nevada and have dozens of "regular" local clients, yet I have less than a handful of reviews. Most of my clients are married and are afraid that someone will find out who they are and what they are doing if they post a review for a provider. I've "heard" that there are some hobbyist's out there who make it their business to find out if the reviews are "Real" (if the provider posted it herself) and in doing so they also find out who these guys really are. Not every hobbyist wants the world to know what they do. I know that they really like my service, if they didnt they wouldnt keep coming back on a regular basis (some as long 10 months), My town has some AMAZING women my clients could visit, but they "choose" to vistit me on a consistent basis...the unfortunate part is "YOU'LL never know that" because they wont write a review out of fear...hmmm...
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You said: Reviews are the hobbyist consumer reports. With the amount of money that is to be exchanged, the risked taken there has to be a system of checks and balances.

Reply: Yes, but the system (though we all love and appreciate it) is not perfect...it's not the gospel. You cant believe everything you read, you shouldnt avoid a girl because she has no reviews, providers shouldnt "bug" clients for reviews and hobbyist's shouldnt try to "blackmail" providers for positive reviews.

my .02 cents

Sable

Re: "Blackmail"....If I were a provider and a guy gave me that crap, I would probably give him his money back (assuming there had been no services performed) and leave. Yes, you expose yourself to a potential back stabbing review that way, but I believe that we are all called in our lives to operate with integrity whenever we can, and demand the same of those we deal with as well. You have to set standards for YOURSELF in egards to what you will do and how you will allow others to treat you...and the other persons' response to that is for them to decide.

I have never had a provider DEMAND a review from me (and I guess I should go ahead and admit that I have written reviews for all my encounters save one) but I have had an agency allude to the fact that I write reviews (they "knew" me) and the agency told the provider as much, with the idea being (so I was told) that a good performance by her would lead to a good review by me (a correct assumption, but still a hell of an assumption to make)and potentially more business for her. The point of all this being that it DOES work both ways for the benefit of provider and hobbyist, and both parties can use it to there advantae if they are smart, without being unethical.

I write reviews because I use reviews. To me, they are invaluable information, especially since I am still relatively new to the hobby, and since I don't have a network of providers I see (I practice a 'one and done' policy). I spent months reading reviews and gathering both data and courage before my first ever "date" with a provider...and I am sure it works that way for many guys.

Insofar as the content of the review...I can completely understand the sentiment that aome ladies would just as well not have lots of explict details shared. I have to admit that I tend to be torn on this...lady friends of mine and guy friends as well that know me would tell you that I am not one to kiss and tell. Not so much because I am a gentleman, (I mean, who is kidding who?) but because I have found...and confirmed...that if a lady feels what she shares with you will be a secret kept between the two of you, she is likely to share much more. It is to my BENEFIT to keep my mouth closed...and time and time again ladies in my life have shown appreciation for this.

Having said that however, my reviews ARE detailed, and explict, because I feel I owe it to my fellow hobbyist to be as honest and open about the experience as possible. I don't really feel I owe the provider anything, other than to conduct myself as a "gentleman" while we are together (this includes hygine), to do nothing that makes her uncomfortable, to treat her with dignity and respect, and of course, the fee. The fee is the key...we aren't on a "date" about which I will run back to the guys in my fraternity and share all the juice with. There was a service performed, and I am providing a review / critique. In my mind, since I "paid for it", I am allowed to write what I please, so long as it is indeed all fact. If a provider has "personal" reasons for objecting to reviews, she should give some thought to her field of endeavor.

Just my thoughts....

I feel that she has the right to required multiple references if it is her policy. Also some provider choose not to disclose personal encounters for many reasons. But you should also require multiple references and not let her talk you out of it.

Per statement from a client on another board mention that many, if not all, of the facts found on the provider's website. What some client search for may be called a number of different things - attitude, chemistry, enthusiasm - but boils down to how the provider interacts with her client.

Mabe some of the reviews here may not pass some people standard, but I can tell you that my reviews are written to the client best knowledge-some information told, I wish they didn't mention at all. But if we coach them what to say then it is a false review.(What the heck "sh-t happen" You can bet your sweet ass none of my reviews were written for a bargain discount price.

I am an honest provider and I am one that take the board serious and have no reason to consider anything written about me is bull shit. If I rip someone off, it should be told, If I give top service, it should also be told. I do not expect my word to stand for it self, considering I do not know my client personally. So why not trust in the review boards.

I my self (Independent) provide top service for a variety of purposes. GFE/BFE I label my self on the top list meaning truly top-quality and recognized my clients interest. I'm dedicated, professional, honest and reliable. For all this, Yes i want the experience to be told if a client want to write one. If not that is fine also. I love getting them-heck it's free advertisement)

Some of the girls have professional site and their site does well. So if the review boards work for people like my self so be it. I strive on my personality - Hint-Hint. This is free advertisement for me, And I will continue to use it to my advantage in an honest and positive way.

This is a business and it is an absolute blast and as such, So let try to keep it in a professional manner. Continue to do research and be smart and trust the board to some degree.


Ruth



-- Modified on 3/27/2002 9:59:39 PM

Ruth that is the way it should work. The review is just free advertisement to for you. You sound like your services are top knotch . The system is working on all 8 cylinders here. The there will always be abuses in any system. Thanks for the reply.

Thank you,
But it was just my 2ct. I have to admit that your reply made me smile.

Ruth