1) People who sit directly in front, behind or next to you in a movie theatre that is empty. Urgh! This is a big pet peeve of mine. I like the alone time and don't want to hear them chatter, banging on the chairs or being disturbed by me munching on my popcorn.
2) People who don't use turn signals on the roads/freeways and don't look before they cross lanes or turn.
3) People who pull out in front of you then go slow.
4) People who come to the door before noon -- or anytime -- to preach about their religion. No offense - I respect their views but let me sleep and have some peace at home.
5) Annoying flyers or business cards stuck in your front door that you don't know are there for days and start flying around your yard.
6) People who place their garbage bins in front of your house instead of their houses. This also applies to people who park in front of your house instead of the people who they are visiting.
7) People who litter.
8) People who let their children run around all over the grocery store or Walmart. Urgh! I love kids but there's a limit. Sometimes I want to trip the little bastards. 
Just kidding.
9) The poor people who have to answer a business phone and have a tag line like: "Hello! Barton, Beach, Barry, Bostwick and Benton, attorneys at law. This is Jessica. I hope you're having a great day. How may I direct your call?" Um, I forgot why I called.
10) Waiting to buy a ticket (theater, concerts, whatever) where the people in front of you are fumbling for their wallet and have a million questions to ask the cashier.
11) People who tailgate.
12) People who talk on their cell phones very loudly like they want the world to know how important they and their phone call is. Get a grip and shut the hell up!
13) People who cut in line in front of you.
14) People waiting on you that look and act like they'd rather be playing golf or stabbing you in the back.
15) People who think it's okay to work construction then go out for a beer afterward without taking a shower. However, this does not apply to coal miners and bartenders with allergies.
16) People who honk at you the minute the light turns green. Have patience, people. This happens a lot in Phoenix (and people who continuously run red lights).
17) Airlines that only hold size-six people and then expect us to sit on top of each other with no leg room.
18) Watered-down, expensive drinks at a bar.
19) Some guy who just plops down next to you at your table and acts like he's your date when all you want to do is attract someone else. Not a big problem for me since I don't frequent bars, but I can remember those days. My girlfriends and I would look at each other and say, "Danger! Danger! Danger Will Robinson, danger!"
20) People who have heavy bass in their cars playing rap that think it's okay to blast the rest of the world with their lousy music. I'd like to maintain my hearing so I can listen to my music, thank you.
21) People who cannot drive while talking on their cell phone. Yikes! An accident waiting to happen.
22) Twenty commercials before you see your favorite show.
23) Someone's dogs barking all night. Hello! Get up and tell your muts to shup up. Or, better yet, allow your poor animals to come inside and sleep with you. It's 115 right now in Phoenix.
24) People who have animals and then don't pay attention to them. Also, give them fresh water and don't expect them to drink out of the pool you idiots!
25) People who think the world revolves around them.
Anyone else with suggestions, please feel free to chime in.
Hugs,
Ciara
-- Modified on 7/15/2006 10:21:14 AM
26) People in checkout lines at Wal-mart that wait until all their items are checked and then pull out their check book to write the check.
27) Idiots that go to the self checkout line at Wal-Mart and then have no clue how to use it.
28) Wal-mart closing down every checkout register but two at 10:00 pm , including the self checkout registers.
28) Idiot driving slow in the left lane on Interstates and refuses to move over, even though the line behind them is a mile long.
"When someone hands you a flyer it's kind of like they're saying 'here, you throw this out'..." - mitch hedberg
1. People who turn left from the right hand lane.
2. People who ride your bumper on a 2 lane road, then scream past, and end up one car ahead at the light.
3. People who can't see over the steering wheel.
4. Trucks that have been "lifted" so they are 5 feet off the ground.
5. Anyone who drives a Ferarri(sp) or Lamboghini(sp),show offs! Of course I'm very jealous.
6. Anyone who drives a car that "dances".
7. Anyone who has kids in a car who aren't buckled in.
8. 6 year old kids driving those mini bikes on the public streets.
9. The parents who bought them the mini bikes
Oh, yeah, also the honking at the green light thing.
Whew, that's a start...
Just my opinion...
B
-- Modified on 7/15/2006 11:39:44 AM
-- Modified on 7/15/2006 11:40:21 AM
- cutting corner when making a left turn
- In rush hour traffic, waiting until the car in front has turned completely before turning!
- swerving to the right when making a left turn or swerving to th left when making a right; that scares the the hell out of me when I on the neighboring lane.
Hon, there are just too many people where you live. Makes for a good client base, but it makes for a living environment that's soooooo stressful.
That's my problem. I'm living too far out right now and have to fight people to get downtown. I can't wait to be urban again. Besides, I've lived all over the world and it's not perfect anywhere. Darn it! Hey, this post was supposed to be funny.
Hugs,
Ciara
-- Modified on 7/15/2006 2:39:53 PM
You must come to FollowmeVille.
It often kinda GOOFY here , but that is part of the phun.
We have bunnies too, but you know that! ! Wink..... and friends.
Thank you
-- Modified on 7/16/2006 6:51:50 AM
-- Modified on 7/16/2006 7:24:28 AM
-- Modified on 7/16/2006 7:26:33 AM
People who make lists.... 
wink!
Soccer leagues who seem to forget that Father's day is set aside for families.
Ex's who make lists of what I am to do for her.
The Unbelievably poor choices we have for what passes as leadership in this country.
The press.
Complicated tax codes.
The hateful "rap 'music'"
Anyone named Barbara - who goes by the name Barbra (as is Walters and Steisand...) soooo pretentious...
Universities - all of them... they are failing our society.... all too much
France.
Well - you said it was to be funny! and so it is!
The worst: people who are condescending. Wink!
-- Modified on 7/15/2006 9:53:12 PM
1. People who have no perspective.
I saw a list like this from another part of the world and those silly people came up with answers like this:
1. People who shoot missiles and drop bombs on my city, neighborhood and home.
2. People who run into a coffee shop with a bomb strapped to their chest.
3. People who roam the neighborhood in packs with clubs, knives and guns to commit genocide against my ethnic group.
And, their petty gripes went on and on and on.
However I took your response as you're upset with me. This was supposed to be funny. Gees! Believe me, I've been to war, lived in foreign countries, watched friends get shot in front of me buddy, but I can still bitch (like you). Of course there are more important things in life than those on my list (except maybe the automobile driving because that's just plain dangerous), but we have to laugh at ourselves from time to time. Without some form of release we get a little wound up too tight, people! Relax.
Hugs,
Ciara
-- Modified on 7/15/2006 9:57:39 PM
I'm not upset. I understand your list and see these little annoying things every day. I try not to let them get to me by keeping perspective.
-- Modified on 7/16/2006 9:02:20 AM
This one may be unique to the NYC metro area as it's NEVER happened to me anywhere else but quite frequenly in Gotham :
Total stranger bozos who approach you in the street, and politely [or not-so-politely] ask you "Can I borrow a cigarette?"
I wonder, is the person planning to give me back the butt when s/he's finished?
Or will s/he track me down one day to repay the cigarette? I once as a gag offered my address to the moocher and the look was absolutely murderous.
And if I have to wait a really long time for repayment of the borrowed cigarette, would it be churlish of me to expect interest?
This seems confined to real down-and-outers and underclaas teenagers -- at least for now.
come out can I have it"
or the bum who has a dog and asks for money for the dog! (I carry doggie snacks in my car, and when I give them to the dog, the look from the dudes is always pure hatred, but the dogs - they love it)
but the worse are the dudes who approach me, well dressed, and pretend that they "forgot" their buss/train fare home.... argh...
That happened to me once in Penn Station, the guy was so well-dressed, his shoes alone cost 10 times as much as the ratty work boots, blue jeans and t-shirt I was wearing. Go figure.
But I think that's an initial approach to a confidence scam. If you saw the movie "Criminal" the lead character is a con man and he explains to his partner that most people will help a well-dressed person simply because the person looks like, under normal circumstances, he wouldn't need help.
And way back in 1985 a local homeless/panhandler type asked me for money "to get something to eat." I was just returning from my semi-weekly produce trip, so i offerred him the entire bag. Needlees to say, he turned it down. But his look was one of surprise, not hostility.
PS. The guy holdingthe door, if he's not too dangerous looking, you can mess with his mind and tell him, "oh, sorry, no change I'm using a debit-card."
PPS. Any sightings of Mister Spock. Where can he have gone>
while going through O'Hare.. they pushed the poppy in front of him, and he looked at them and said... "no thanks, I'm trying to cut down!" Stopped the dude cold.... So much of modern society is just "rude" crude and in your face...
For the most part, I do feel sorry for the less fortunate, and indeed with a colleague at work, we found one homeless man, tried to get him a job, and a low cost shelter situation that would be tolerable.... We failed badly. Most need more help that we could offer. Hence, I now give my doggie biscuits, cause the dogs genuinely are thankful, and don't question the kindness.
As for mr. spock, I do not know where he is. and often wonder.
That's hilariou, wish I had though of it!
This next one is boarderline cruel.
Twice I have been accosted by members of Jews for Jesus and asked if I'm Jewish [I'm a disgruntled mostly lapsed Roman Catholic]. I told them "No, no I'm not [pause for dramatic effect], I'm Palestinian." They got very embarrassed and moved away very quickly.
I also did this with an Orthodox Jewish group who does the same thing. This fellow DID NOT see the humor in this AT ALL and almost came to blows with me. I mean, it's NYC, right? asshole capital of North America? He's got to expect somewhere along the line an answer like that. And it sure beats the less patient responses which are mostly filled with obscenties, crudites, suggestions re impossible physical acts and all the rest.
Ah, life in The Big Apple -- it's rotten to the core.
always entertaining... as well as Umberto's clam house... Ferrara's for cannolis, The Dakota, the Met (all three of them!), McSourley's (sp), the Empire State Bldg where we call all see that lady and that man meet, Chinatown (the real china town) and of course the long Island Railroad.... to the Hamptons! lol! and nothing beats walking down Broadway on a nice spring day!
Unfortunately my favorite restaurant "Topkapi Palace" closed years ago, but the Russian Tea Room is still open.... as is Nathan's!!!
And forgot ! Lanie!
-- Modified on 7/17/2006 6:52:18 AM
BizSupe, I think the Russian Tea Room went under a few years ago. Or at least it looked like it was? Well, next time I'm on West 57th Street, I'll look.
NYC mayors are like that Raymond Chandler : From 30 feet away she looked great. At ten feet she looked like someone who had to be admired from 30 feet away. [not the exact line, but...]
lol. You are right on (esp #24).
People who don't say thank you when you hold the door open or cashiers who don't say it are annoying too.
Here are some more.....
1. People who go to the ONLY check out lane that is open with two carts worth of groceries, then pull out a file cabinet of coupons because they have a coupon for EVERY item in both carts, and meanwhile back at the ranch, the half gallon of Rocky Road you stopped to pick up is turning into a Slushy Road in your hands!
2. People who straddle the parking line and take up two spaces so their precious car doesn't get a ding in it.
3. People who pass in the passing lane going exactly ONE mile an hour faster than they person they are passing.
4. People who don't pull forward in the left turn lane on a busy street so that they AND the car behind them can clear the intersection when the light goes yellow.
5. Religious nuts can knock on my door all day, its the nuts who try to legislate their beliefs into my life that twist my noodle off.
6. The fact that hot dogs come in a package of 10, and hot dog buns come in packages of 8. You'd think they could coordinate this one. We put a man on the friggin moon after all.
I do recall that the hotdog/bun dichotomy has been researched by no less a luminary than Cecil Addams of The Straight Dope column fame.
It had to do with optimizing packaging and shipping issues, really quite facinating if you're into packaging and shipping issues.
Let's get back to sex!
you buy a package of 8 buns and, no matter how much meat you buy it's always one non-hamburger shaped patty. Why don't they sell it like Mcdonalds in a hamburger shape?
* Drivers who speed up to pass you just so they can slam on the brakes and turn ahead of you.
* People who open up the freezer section window in the supermarket then can't make up their minds so they fog up all the windows and defrost half the food because they're too f-ing STUPID to look through the conveniently provided window before reaching in and taking the food.
* People too self-important to actually park in a parking space so they have to invent one, usually in the clearly marked FIRE LANE.
* People who cannot prioritize safely operating their two-ton moving vehicle through traffic in favor of yakking on their cell.
* People who want a ridiculous amount of compensation for a relatively minor inconvenience because they think if they ask for the moon as an opening ploy they will wind up with better compensation. It has the opposite effect when they try it on me.
* Telemarketers (they deserve the death penalty).
* People who don't get what they wanted out of a vending machine so they will keep pecking the button believing the machine will understand on the 37th time what it failed to understand the previous 36.
* People who overcook microwave popcorn in the office break room.
* People who refuse to use up the last of something because then they'll be forced to replace it.
* People who use up the last of something and then don't replace it anyway.
* News reporters who stick their microphones in the face of some grieving spouse or parent to ask them "What are you feeling right now?".
"I feel like shooting down every f-ing reporter within a 20-mile radius, okay lady?"
------------------
Thanks. I feel better now.
facts anymore... you are correct, it is easier for them to thrust a microphone in a person's face (who may or may not be guilty, or who is grieving or in any stressfull situation) than to actually do the leg work necessary to verify a story.... all to achieve the "bambi in the headlights look...." which we have seen all too often... Me, I would like to see a few more of these people kicked in the groin... or with a few more broken noses! think that the quality of reporting would go up... or maybe they would be like your point # 7
What about the bozo motorist who passes you on a city street only to have to stop and wait at the red light 50 feet ahead. I feel like rear-ending the clowns who do this, but I refrain. I mean, what the heck, were you that much in a hurry to have to wait out the red light anyway?
What about the bozo who is unsure of where to go, steps off the escalator and stops imediately in front of it while he looks around to try to get his bearings? Forcing the next poor soul either to have an acccidental collision with him or to engage in some fancy footwork to avoid same?
The dude in front of me at McDonald's paying with a friggin credit card to buy his SMALL juice only. 79 cents sir.
WTF
used needles from their back pockets, and I get stuck! Also find the smell of Kools annoying !
What about the old ladies at the supermarket who MUST pay with exact change, upend the contents of their ratty change-purse on the conveyor belt, and slowly and laboriously count out the 57 cents necessay? And it's always some exotic combination of penies, nickles, and dimes in which pennies predominate. Then, of course, she has to even more slowly and laboriously replace all her ratbag trash in the change purse.
And needless to say, the poor old lady is arthretic, rhumotoid, and palsy-ridden.
a micro halter top and she reaches into the pocket of her painted on jean microshorts... to get the pennies to pay for the 1.99 price on a coke and bag o chips... needless to say, I do not grip then!!! I just lear! lol
Biz, thatt IS NOT a gripe! I don't see the downside, unless of course you're at a disanvantageous angle and an't manage a decent and inconspicuous stare.
I'm still wondering about Spock.
LE that continues to work speed traps, seat belt fundraisers, stings, anything but real crime.
First, I'm surprised that no one has commented on #1. Having seen your pictures on your website, I would try to sit next to you everytime in a dark theater.
more for your list -
Non-handicapped people who park in handicapped places.
People who walk though the door to a store and then stop, blocking the door (especially when they rush to beat you to the door).
Driverless cars (okay, actually they have little old ladies in them who can't see over the dashboard and are driving 20 mph)
Addendums to # 12 - 1)People (especially with headsets) who have long personal chats in public places. I don't care to hear them tell their friends they are now in the frozen food aisle of the grocery store. 2) People who personalize their ringtone to some 30 second song clip and set it on high. Especially when they don't answer it on the first ring.
I used to work in a place like #9. When I call one of my friends there, I identify myself before they have to go through all that.
I agree with you on #24. I can't watch Animal Police on Animal Planet because it makes me sick to see what people do to animals. People who abuse and/or mistreat animals should be locked up and left without food or water to see how they like it.
