Recently, my sister and her husband wanted to take a long weekend  -- without the kids.  Guess who was asked to babysit the nephews?

I had planned a number of [i hoped] interesting, tasteful, and horizon-expanding experiences for the little weasels, most centered around visits to museaums [and  a sporting event or two.]  Alas, painting, sculpture, and even dinosaur skeletons held little appeal fot my youthful charges, and their immediate interests centered around the flic "Iron Man."  Well, why not?  They're kids, this is to be expected, and I did read "Iron Man" back in the 60s.

so, the nephews had a great time and loved the movie.  I enjoyed the fact that they enjoyed themselves, but my mind did wander.

So, i began to think, do super heroes hobby?  

From one persprective, i think they would be naturals at this.   Pretty much every one of them has a secret identity which has to be hidden, and there is an unavoidable component of concealment and deception involved in The Hobby.

And would they hobby in their secret identities or in their super hero personas?  I would think the former, but if they hobbied as a super hero, some interesting possibilities could crop up.

And you've got to envy Bruce Wayne [Batman] and Tony Stark [Iron Man]  -- both are millionaires, so their Hobby budget would be a considerable one.

I'm guessing that the most succesful super hero hobbyists would be Mister Fantastic [of the Fantastic 4] and Plastic Man [his laid-back counterpart at DC Comics].  Remember, both had a power which was not exactly earthstopping as superpowers go -- they could stretch and bend their bodies into any conceivable shape and form.  Certainly, they would not be haunting this forum with Qs about size, would they?

And The Hulk?  Now, this fellow's going to have problems booking apointments.  He's not exactly inconspicuous, and i'm wondering what his condom size requirement might be.

how about Doctor Strange?  Ain't that name itself a turnoff?  I imagine he'd get run through DateCheck numerous times.  Possibly he's given to the BDSM corner of The Hobby? [There was also a DC hero know as "Adam Strange" in the period of appx 1957-63, but he was a space explorer and adventurer, a pretty cool occupation, and I don't see him getting blacklisted].

Namor, The Sunmariner?  That makes me think of a guy with very particular and demandings tastes in positions and exotics practices.

Captain America?   would he only see native-born providers?  would he hobby only in the USA?

The Flash?  Ah, poor guy?!  His prospects don't seem encouraging.

Who would the ladies perfer as dates?  Super Heroes with actual super powers [Superman, Spiderman, etc..?] or super heoes who do not have super powers but are really just super prime/enhanced physical specimens [Batman, Daredevil, Captain America...?]

Howard the Duck?  Oh, never mind.

My personal fave, though, as a super hero Hobbyist would have to be Green Lantern.  Remember, his power is his possession of the ring [given to him by a paternalistic superrace of aliens], which as to be recharged every 24 hours.  Makes me think of desperate guys [like myself] anxiously waiting for the ED meds to kick in.

now, i would have loved to kick this around with the nephews, but, as they are still pre-adolescents, discretion ruled and I had to forebear.  So I'm turning to this happy community to fulfill my curiosity.

apologies if most of my references are dated -- I stopped reading comics sometime around the end of 1968, so by knowlwdge of what's transpired since then in this field is not impressive.

The Invisible Man would be kind of erotic.  Being touched in various places, not knowing when or where the next stroke was coming from?  But then again, I like blindfolds for the same reason.

On a side note - guess he'd have to put the cover on himself.  I wouldn't be able to find the goods.  LOL

Kari~~

-- Modified on 6/1/2008 10:17:15 AM

You have to go bareback to get your immunization.  And I know you girls would protect the pudgy schlub against everything as long as it wasn't too painful or clumsy!

OUCH!

But then again. Who could survive to offer Superman a "second" cup?

-- Modified on 6/1/2008 12:22:04 PM

They ALL some time or another got Wonder Woman in a vulnerable/restrained situation. Every one of these evildoers was looking at the very least several concurrent life sentences if caught for their Villainy. Why didn't any of these guys add a few sexual crimes against Wonder Woman to their resume?  

-- Modified on 6/1/2008 12:17:49 PM

They have something in common in trying to protect them. It might make an interesting topic for a book.

I like to think that "Batgirl" was a provider.  How else could she afford the "Bat Outfit" and tricked out motorcycle.  Her dad was just a civil servant.

I'm so far out of my depth here I think I need floaties.

I'll take a stab, though, as my hungover little brain is trying its hardest to make the connections.

It's my understanding that Bruce Wayne (Batman) was hot and rich and had lots of little toys in that Bat belt. I think he'd be fun. Plus, we could go cruising in the Batmobile. Fuck yeah. I'm down.

I have no idea about most of the people you mentioned, but I remember some of the movies they made from comic books and based off of those, I'd have to say Spidey would be too nice a guy to even venture into these waters (he's in love with Mary Jane!) The Hulk wouldn't hobby, either... he'd be smashing around town getting his rage on, not bedding a beautiful woman. The Fantastic 4, though, I could see the flame guy doing this and maybe the big guy, but not the scientist who's in love.

Katie

Until angered he's mild mannered physicist Dr. Bruce Banner, kind’a like BizzaroSuperDude, LOL

http://www.theeroticreview.com/discussion_boards/viewmsg.asp?MessageID=261763&boardID=12&page=1

-- Modified on 6/1/2008 4:21:20 PM

as his body parts quadruple in size after getting excited.

The image just won't go away.

appointments in between those times when we are busy saving the earth... and we always have to worry about Kryptonite... that stuff can kill ya...

I try not to wear my gear under my secret identity clothes on days I have a hobby appointment... and well, lets just say, being a superhero is not cheap.... so I have to budget both my time and money....

but there are advantages....  - X-Ray vision being one of them... being able to fly to appointments... and of course - on occasion I will take a chrcoal briquette and squeeze it into a diamond to pay for a session....

yea, we superheros have our ups and downs just like the rest of ya.

He could please any life form in the universe.

I may have erred.  I think Plastic Man is an incorrect name.  The character's real name is [get this] The Elongated Man.  does that say it all, or what?

here's a scenario :  Dr Bruce Banner is confirmed as the head of DARPA, or wins the Nobel Prize in Physics, or is elected President of the American Physical Association. or becomes Chairman of the National Science Foundation or the American Federation of Scienctists, etc...  Pleased with himself, and justly seeking to treatr himself in a special way, he books an overnighter with a PSE/GFE 10/10 provider.

Well, I imagine Dr. Banner is going to find himself in the middle of some deep emotional currents, perhaps enough to kick off the transformation into The Hulk. So, even booking sessions as Dr. banner, there's no guarantee for the lady...


-- Modified on 6/2/2008 12:24:34 PM

i imagine this ; Peter Parker is burdened by a lifetime's worth of near-matricidal, repressed rage at poor old sickly Aunt May. she's screwed up his life as much as has the possesion of spidr powers.  He hooks up with the most life-beaten, down-on-her-luck MILF or GILF provider he can find on the Eros-NY guide.  Better still, he finds her on CraigsList!  He finally gets it all out of his system.  He blows off both Mary Jane Watson and Gwen Stacey and becomes the love slave of J. Jonah Jameson.

-- Modified on 6/2/2008 12:23:39 PM

That would be an appropriate name for a hobbyist who is also a superhero, would it not?

8o)

Here's where my 25 yr. hobby of collecting comic books comes in handy.  (I stopped 10 years ago).  Or labels me.  I really don't give a shit!  LMAO!  Both Plastic Man and Elongated Man are DC comics properties.  Both have basically the same abilities like Mr. Fantastic of the Fantastic 4.  As someone previously alluded to...how did Lois Lane survive the super-shot (assuming Supes didn't pull out, of course)?  And didn't CIM or CIF?  OMG, no wonder I'm here!  LMAO!  How about that Shakespeare?  LOL!