post. She said she doesn't prep for anal. Instead she just asks the customer if there is shit on his dick when he pulls out. She said one customer told her, "Don't worry about it." (That was probably really a "yes" - lol) I used to link it to my comments about her, but she finally got wise and had it taken down. Most here remember that discussion. I'm surprised you don't. It was last fall. Her comments were pretty gross about her hygiene practices. If you're going to see her, wear a HAZ-MAT suit.
-- Modified on 6/19/2018 2:18:49 AM
If a client is a steady regular, two to three times a month - multiple hour sessions - what types of arrangements are typical?
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Is the client expected to pay full rate all the time? Do providers typically give extra OTC? Can a "volume discounts" be reasonably negotiated?
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I'm in such a situation (over six months), but don't know if it is reasonable to expect special consideration or not. I pay full rate every time (plus tip), and the provider has never offered anything like OTC.
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I'm really smitten by this provider, but maybe I should move on?
There's no standard. If you want an arrangement, you should go to Seeking Arrangements and find a girl for monthly payments. Theoretically you can get a lot more hours for the same money. See The Erotic Highway forum on this site for tips on finding arrangement.
You are talking about the kind of things that just happen for guys who have some game. No one here can explain to you how to do that. You either have it or you don't. Step up and talk to her. Then you'll find out. Or not.
Thanks everyone. Of all of the comments, I find this one the most relevant.
just like most bosses will not offer a raise, but know full well the employee is worth it, and will give it and just waiting for him to have the courage to ask..
Obviously you are a great client regular on her list! Of course she appreciates you paying full price without haggling her, and tip on top of that! You are gold to her. It is not in her best interest to walk away from the table with less money, of course. So you might could approach her of an arrangement with extended time, a meal, game of pool, drink, or occasionally something very special like a music show.
Good luck
Madison
The rates for my arrangements are based on my personal finance guidelines. Therefore it is inexpensive for me to offer arrangements and it is more convenient for me to devote my time and priority to someone whom I have an arrangement with.
There is no "typical" arrangement. It just depends on both parties and what works best for them. There are some exclusive providers who require an arrangement of $3,000 + just for two dates, and some who offer mutual exclusivity and unlimited dates for $10,000+
When you enter an arrangement with someone you both come to a mutual agreement of what is expected from both. So if you expect x amount of dates for x amount of money, you should have stated that prior to your arrangement. If the agreed upon arrangement is not working for you, then ask the person you are in the arrangement with to change things around.
...maybe not. Seeing some other ladies before you see her again is probably a good idea. It could give you better perspective. Probably some new ladies you've never seen before.
All of the things you mentioned can and have been done with providers and their regulars but as was said there is no standard. It sounds to me though you're thinking of going futher and possibly considering a relationship. It can be done and has been. Some have worked out and many have not. Do a search here and on your regional board for this topic you'll likely find information you can use wether it's just about being a regular and receiving the perks you asked about or taking it to another level.
Consider you may be feeling the way you do because she is very good at her job and that's as far as it goes. If I'm completely wrong about the "your wanting something more" then just ignore what I said but I still recommend seeing some new ladies.
either gets greased or thrown away for a new one. If you are OK with the status quo, shut up and accept the status quo. If you'd like to find out about some other kind of arrangement, find a way to bring it up.
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I hope that someone with better board memory can help to find a fairly recent (less than 1 year old) thread. The regular started to feel like he was being taken for granted. He started to cut back and got a shitstorm of abuse from her. Stuff along the lines of "We always do X hours." "How am I supposed to pay my bills?" "I AM ENTITLED!" (not exact quotes from the regular's post).
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I think you should broach the subject even if it's just to find out where you (both) stand. If she thinks you're her regular meal ticket and nothing more, at least you know to suppress your feelings and not "go there" (the smitten thing). If she reads you the riot act and exposes her BSC side, I'd say sayonara in a hurry! If she sweet talks you into to continuing as is, at least she knows how you feel and might work towards some kind of change (or immediately offer some other arrangement just for you).
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There is always the danger of being overly smitten with an ATF in what is usually a "no strings attached" situation, but that's a whole other topic. Yes, it happens, but be careful of strings and their potential to create entanglements.
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And give some thought to your last line:
-- Modified on 3/12/2018 4:50:54 AM
If she only has 2 similar clients per day and only works 4 days per week, then you amount to less than 10% of her business. How much of a discount do you think that deserves?
OTOH, after six months of loyalty (and tips), if she's pushing you out the door right when time is up, then she's not exactly smitten with you. If a reciprocal smitten arrangement is what you seek, you need to try shopping elsewhere, but no reason to burn this bridge in case you want to go back.
If she is busy and has a large clientele, then she is more likely to view your hours as fungible with all other hours. In other words, if don't book the time you book, then someone else well, and she gets the same amount of income either way, so it makes no difference to her WHO is handing her the envelope for those particular hours.
On the flipside, if she has days where she is not booked, then she will place more value on the hours that YOU book with respect to her overall business revenue, and is more likely to be open to a proposal that would get you more bang for your buck in exchange for her being able to rely on a certain number of monthly hours of future business.
For me, I prefer a perk in the form of OTC time. If I'm booking a two hour session BCD, I like to get another two hours afterward for a nice dinner. I am not opposed to paying $3-400 for a nice dinner for two with a bottle of wine, but I don't pay a provider for her time to watch her eat with me. If I'm booking two-hour sessions to or three times a month, I find most independent ladies are not opposed to allowing some OTC social time attached to about 50% of those meetings. But again, the biggest variable is the overall state of her business, which is often difficult for us to know, so like any negotiation, you just tell her what you would like, and see how she reacts. Not every provider will go for this, but enough will to make it work for you.
Agree big time with all of these advice posts and especially with de lion's. I`m in a somewhat similar situation as you. My #1 ATF gives me mucho OTC perks like dinners/drinks, overnights (with continued sex) and even asked if she could join me on my vacay last month to Miami. She then got booked up for those dates and canceled and made business her priority and I respect her for that.
Like other posters on your thread have suggested you have to ask for more and push the envelope a little. I won`t ask for a fee discount as that is her lifeline for survival and for me that`s not something to fuck with and I don`t. She recently raised her fees but grandfathered me with her old rate. That tells me something.
Yeah, OTC stuff I do ask for and have gotten only yes replies so far. I`ll keep carefully asking for more but I tell her that she`s driving the bus in our relationship which always elicits a smile from her. No pressure from me might be one of the keys here. I just keep bringing my A+ game and hope it works, so far so good. After seeing her 18 times in the past year and a half I still could fall hard for this one and praying I can keep myself under a tight rein. Not easy but seeing others helps.
See and keep seeing other ladies and let her know it. Seeing others helps grow big balls and confidence and will help to temper your "Smitten" malady. Be very very careful and use some self discipline to not fall in love. My very first provider (A very savvy milf) two years ago told me that the biggest mistake she has seen in this game is clients falling in love with a provider. She said that is absolutely a one way ticket to hell and she`s right. I will never forget her words as she wagged her finger at me!
Pay close attention to the advice you have been given above by these savvy hobbyists as they have been around this block more times than you and I have. If she doesn`t respond to your liking then quickly drown your sorrows and bury yourself in other pussy. Good luck
If she is busy and has a large clientele, then she is more likely to view your hours as fungible with all other hours. In other words, if don't book the time you book, then someone else well, and she gets the same amount of income either way, so it makes no difference to her WHO is handing her the envelope for those particular hours.
On the flipside, if she has days where she is not booked, then she will place more value on the hours that YOU book with respect to her overall business revenue, and is more likely to be open to a proposal that would get you more bang for your buck in exchange for her being able to rely on a certain number of monthly hours of future business.
For me, I prefer a perk in the form of OTC time. If I'm booking a two hour session BCD, I like to get another two hours afterward for a nice dinner. I am not opposed to paying $3-400 for a nice dinner for two with a bottle of wine, but I don't pay a provider for her time to watch her eat with me. If I'm booking two-hour sessions to or three times a month, I find most independent ladies are not opposed to allowing some OTC social time attached to about 50% of those meetings. But again, the biggest variable is the overall state of her business, which is often difficult for us to know, so like any negotiation, you just tell her what you would like, and see how she reacts. Not every provider will go for this, but enough will to make it work for you.
With one provider I reached an agreement after some months of seeing her every time she toured my town that I would always be her appointment right before lunch or dinner. We'd have our private fun, then go out to a nice meal, and sometimes she'd even bring along her touring partner. We were mutually fond of each other, and her reasoning was "I have to take time to eat anyway" so she enjoyed it as much as I did. The OTC time was always considered her option, and she could (and sometimes did) cancel if she had another appointment or some scheduling change. But, many times it worked fine.
With another provider, it started out roughly that way, but I saw her SO frequently that I offered this arrangement: $2800 up front for 8 hours, taken 2 hours at a time. At that time, this amounted to about a 30% discount off her 1 hour rate: She liked the lump sum up front, some smoothing out of a variable income stream, and I was a predictable repeater and so gave the discount. I liked the lower price/hour and assumed some risk that she might flake with the money, but she was utterly scrupulous about it.
So, offer something and ask for something, and see how it goes.
If you and her have some sort of minimal baseline emotional connection then it might be possible to pay a discounted rate for being a steady regular. It varies from each provider. Generally if you're super nice, polite, respect her limits, then getting a discounted rate is possible. The girls I see don't mind I pay a discounted rate from their full rate. One girl I see I just pay for the motel room. No payment to her. Her decision.
If so, then be happy you have found such a great gal and don't do anything to mess it up.
On the other hand, if you are more concerned about getting your money's worth, then ask her about a discount but be prepared to find either some reduction in her performance and/or outright hostility. Money is a weird subject, and can create volatility.
On occasion I have been offered some kind of deal by a gal whom I knew well, but usually it was in the form of more time rather than a rate decrease.
I think , MOVE ON , before it's too late.
Your last line puts the rest of your questions in a new light. If she really liked you the way you liked her, there should have been some OTC by now, without you asking. There hasn't been, so you need to see her less often and see some other providers for the variety and some perspective.
Because she doesn't seem to have any special feelings for you, it seems possible that you could negotiate a discount and then find that she will sometimes cancel on short notice so she can see someone else who will pay full price.
I get it that you’re smitten, but you’re already having second thoughts.
Some good advice here on how to set up an arranged situation, but I’m not sure that’s your main goal vis a vis providers in general at this point. It seems you’ve got an issue with this one girl. Almost as if you’re looking for one sign, any sign, that some of that special feeling you have for her is mutual.
Play the field a little bit, and if you’re still drawn to her, broach the subject. Maybe suggest you really like seeing her regularly, and mention that it would be nice to have an arrangement that would make it consistent and more frequent.
you're not entitled to anything simply because you've been seeing her ofr 6 months. I have guys i've been seeing for almost 2 years and haven't ever stayed more than an hour, nor have they asked. I have some who i do give otc to, and that's just because i want to. if you're having fun, why stop?
main question: why do you feel entitled to having more of her time that you want to pay for?
You sound awesome! What's your screen name??
...you're asking her to flip her own alias. Brilliant! Ever heard of PM? You can PM an alias you know. Not that she'd ever tell you who she is because she can see who she's dealing with. You couldn't keep her "screen name" secret for a second.
-- Modified on 3/12/2018 11:42:50 PM
of course, you still might need to explain to some people...
I have been in that situation twice and both were very different.
First time around we discussed a regular fee for regular visits that was somewhat reduced from the listed rates, but it remained very prescribed. Second time around it became very casual - she would sometimes stay longer than booked and not want anything extra. A couple of times we met two days in a row and she would say just give me half the normal. After a while I just gave her £2k per month and we would meet 2 or 3 times, and if it was more I would give her extra.
If you truly are that regular with the same woman for that long, have never cancelled, see her for multiple hours, tip and never ask for a discount?
You are a dream client. You should move on if she hasn't said anything on her own. It's not up to you to ask. It's for her to recognize and appreciate. Absolutely move on...
Good luck to you xo
When I have a good long term business client, I do extra things to show that I appreciate their business . Not anything extravagant, but something other than “thank you “. A bottle of wine, movie tickets, etc. Not regularly but often enough to let them know I appreciate their business.
When I am the client, I do want to know that my business is appreciated. And I know the ones who say “thank you” because they were told to say it.
In both cases, the pricing needs to be competitive in the market. No one buys something in hopes or because they will get a bottle of wine.
I hear over and over people saying the hobby is a business . I have experienced little in the way of customer appreciation. Some do it, most act like you are just next in line.
And what most forget who own any type of business, if you don't appreciate and thank your customers/clients you wouldn't have a business to begin with. The little things make all the difference on both sides. From the business owner to the customer and vice versa. Too much competition to not pay attention.
Sorry you feel like a number here...
To see a post from a provider that is an "enlightened entrepreneur" - probably would take very little to tighten this guy up a little and secure a "long term contract" well into the future...
A lot of gals that post on this board are just a little jaded that they are working on their back and don't really view it as managing/building/maintaining - a brand...
Taylor; thank you for the kind comments. I appreciate everyone''s response on this thread - regardless of their point of view.
After reading everything - most of which is spot on - I've come to the conclusion that I'm not really seeking a discount as much as just some form of appreciation for being a good client.
Even a simple "thank you" goes a long way. I realize this is a NSA business, but for me the session shouldn't start when I walk in the door, nor end when I walk out. There is something to be said for session foreplay, and an afterglow where appreciation is shown by both participants.
It can get awkward when the client keeps pushing for more time for the same amount of money. Somr also start wanting more online time etc over time... for a small raise, or no raise. Which can 1. Take away from other ladies you might be seeing (cheating at costs can be controversial,) and 2. Take away from her ability to sustain income.
More time is fine until it gets in the way of seeing / having energy for other people after what is put into the arrangement. Or gets in the way of the free time the escort might be used to on a date by date basis.
In escort world, many might have their lifestyles & goals set up to demand a certain amount of $$ made per month/quarter/year.
I personally have a "dick limit" per month / know what I can manage emotionally and physically... Some might not.
I feel like a lot more commitment goes into an arrangement. Maybe not in the beginning, but over time. It's nice when you really like the person and they like you back. But at the same time, if it's starts taking away from the ability to make a certain amount of money to maintain a lifestyle, due to more connections needed, it can lead to some resentment if you start wanting to stretch the dates, or have more dates & communication.
Incentive To Grow Is Lost too. While some might like the security of a regular paycheck, there is a thrill in growth for some.
I think if someone can balance the time away from the hustle of obtaining new clients, while also maintaining current clients, you might be okay. But you have to remember, if it is not monogamous and she is still on the market, she is still going to need time to make money elsewhere while giving more time to you.
This is one perspective as to why it might be more expensive calling a career escort out of time to do a job that is 100% based on commission.
Of course, the easiest way to find out is to ask. Especially if she doesn't have anything mentioning expectations on her website. But sometimes going into an arrangement, we don't realize that yes, it's guaranteed pay, but it still cost money to run the business and also time to keep it going. And also time to make money on other dates.
-- Modified on 3/14/2018 5:00:52 PM
You mention a ,monthly "dick limit"...
Do you also have a "career dick limit"?
You had me at smitten.... be careful. This is her job. I do give discounts (usually more time) for repeat clients. Always remember that it will be her decision to give discounts (our extra time).
Best of luck!!!
Xoxo
Scarlet
example -Your boss comes to you and says 'you're doing a great job. So good that we want to use you more and cut your salary. ' How does that make you feel? You jump right in there and give another - please sir may I have another?
Do you need to have your ego stroked by getting OTC and free time? Naked Opera got it right in the above post.
A person's got to make a living and stay healthy. I know some mongers don't care about that but don't be that monger. Be the good guy.
If a client is a steady regular, two to three times a month - multiple hour sessions - what types of arrangements are typical?
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Is the client expected to pay full rate all the time? Do providers typically give extra OTC? Can a "volume discounts" be reasonably negotiated?
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I'm in such a situation (over six months), but don't know if it is reasonable to expect special consideration or not. I pay full rate every time (plus tip), and the provider has never offered anything like OTC.
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I'm really smitten by this provider, but maybe I should move on?
You are the owner of your own business, this is hardly a boss/employee relationship.
Here are a couple of much better analogies.
You are a regular at a small owner operated local bar, you've been going in there for six months, you run up a larger than average tab, you tip well, you and the owner seem to get along just great, you start to think of the owner as one of your friends, and then it dawns on you, this woman who owns the bar and has been quite friendly and has been more than happy to take your money has NEVER bought you a drink in return. Do you "need" a free drink? OF course not, would it stroke your ego? Of course not, but you would think the owner of a small proprietorship would want to show her appreciation in some small way, wouldn't you?
There is a small family operated restaurant in your neighborhood, the food is good, the service is excellent and because of this you start going there on a regular basis. You are happy with the place, the owner works the front of the house and knows you always order a decent bottle of wine, run up a pretty healthy tab, never complain, tip well and all in all you are a pretty damn good customer. Now does that restaurant owner "owe" you something extra over and above putting out a great product? No, but would it really hurt to throw you a free appetizer or dessert every once in a while just to show you that your patronage is appreciated?
The OP is not "demanding" OTC time or a discount, he just wants to feel like he is being appreciated, no one likes being taken for granted.
that because he's never broached the subject and she's never offered an arrangement, he should stop seeing her is a bit presumptuous. Voice a concern but know that you are potentially crossing a fine line that might upset a balance depending on how you broach the subject.
There are plenty of bars and restaurants I frequent and recommend that have only once or never given me anything on the house. There are places I know that will comp all drinks every time and I visit sparingly. Clearly if you're visiting that often, there's something you like more than allll the other options out there. Why throw that away? If you're looking for a reason to move on? Than definitely, but otherwise communicate.
But take that with the grain of salt that I don't generally believe in the concept of OTC personally because I make longer dates so substantially more attractive so I figure if you're interested in social time or extra time you'd book it. But I also don't grandfather because when I did, it made me feel undercompensated and unable to mentally give my best. But considering I'm still seeing many of the same people from 2/3/4 years ago despite an almost 100% increase in rates? Many people understand that quality, consistency, connection have value. Figure out whether the nominal discount is more important than the potential wasted time and energy in finding someone who you're equally smitten with...
xo
Sounds accurate.
I'm the one with the prixe fixe menu that doesn't leave you wanting freebies, but might gift you an aperitif or dessert wine every once in awhile if you truly are a so called regular and I like you.
You’re defiantly most providers dream client!
I always appreciate when a client goes above and beyond.
I’ve gone to dinner with regulars or hung out by the pool with them as long as I’ve been treated nicely also doesn’t hurt if there’s chemistry added.
Again it’s one of those things that’s best discussed in person.
Hope this helps!
something special to offer providers other than money. Often times, when a provider is an exceptionally good actress, said client now believes a solid connection has been established and he/she is important to the provider--beyond the $$$$.
Based upon your narrative you are the only one in this "business relationship" who is "smitten." Put yourself in her place; she sees you as a reliable source of income and probably appreciates what you pay her and would gladly take more if you offer more. But 10-1 she is not interested in discounting her service or a "personal" relationship.
Obviously, the big trump card here is communications. Be creative and find a very sweet, tactful, indirect way of laying your cards on the table. Based upon your pattern of behavior (before, during and after sessions) you have already set a de facto standard that has has shaped her expectation of your time together. Go ahead and have "the talk." Nothing ventured, nothing gained. THEN after you have collected more information, you can decide if it is time to move on.
of the time that you feel you have made a connection with a provider that transcends money, it is all in your head (I'm talking to everyone collectively as "you", not NYM specifically). I have had a handful of long-term outside relationships with providers and I can say from experience that meeting a working girl as a customer and then moving on to a real life relationship is often one of the most difficult transitions to make in life.
Their cynical side is apt to reject the "talk" as you just professing a false love for them to try to get freebies, which they get a lot from their customers. If she has no idea you are "smitten" it may be more than awkward and make it difficult to continue to have a good time together. You can't put toothpaste back in the tube. I find it's much better to spend time with them and then let THEM have the epiphany that something special is going on between you. Fast forward a few months until after several outside dinner dates, and you may hear the magic words, "You're my boyfriend now, so you don't have to pay anymore for sex." THEN you know its real. Otherwise, you are a customer, maybe a favorite customer, or a valued customer, but a customer nonetheless, nothing more. If you are the one to suggest you shouldn't be paying because you think there are mutual "feelings" between you, there's a 99% chance you will crash and burn in a fiery death of whatever connection you DID have. While I agree with NYM about "nothing ventured, nothing gained," there also could be a significant loss, a risk that should not be ignored if you like spending time with her in the current state of your customer/provider relationship.
I am in total agreement. In all my years dealing with providers. I have only had a few who have suggested that I not pay. One it was just for a special night. Although I love role plays where when we travel they might play my girlfriend or my wife. Once the date is over it is over.
Like you I enjoy long-term relationships with my providers. Some I see for years. I love the connection and the emotions that come with it. However, there comes a time when the "relationship" fades. For me, it was one telling me she wanted rights to first refusal. Meaning when I came to town I had to call her and if she did not have a regular or a new client she liked she would see me. If she refused me then I could call another provider. REALLY?
I had another who I took to London and while we were there she asked if she could see another client for lunch. I was shocked but to make me feel better she told me she was going to have lunch with him for free. like that made me feel better.
Time to get smitten with another big guy. Time to move on. It is a paid date nothing more nothing less. Like you I like to pretend it is more but it is not! Need to give your head a shake and move on. Just my opinion.
well depends, if the guy is easy going, clean and respect the house and me as a person: YES of course I provide a good discount for a reasonable number of hours.
If the guy is demanding, pretend to get everything, and drive me crazy with requirements: NO he will pay for every second.
If the guy is very complicated person, not clean and disrespectful and complicated: Bye bye, I will not answers his calls anymore.
Once when I was living in Amsterdam, one customer from USA got 1 hour service. I gave him my best attention, he was happy. Then, the next day he sent me an e-mail asking for a new date but this time ask for 50% discount. I said no and he was upset. After this unpleasant exchange of e-mails, I saw here a bad expericence complaining about me, my flat and my service. I think the reviews, It should not be an instrument to obtain discounts by force, extorting. The discount is earned by being considerate, pleasant and good customer.
I spoil my regulars and remind them they are as special to me as I am to them.
Find someone who will appreciate you .