She says he changed the appointment to "social time." Not good form but if the deposit was enough to cover her rate for that service then it's not strictly accurate to say he "didn't pay for his appointment."
it's not completely clear my explanation is correct because her language is vague.
If so, and he refused to pay it for whatever reason, then you should have told him the date is over and send him away.
If not, then this is on you, I'm afraid.
Gals have to be fairly insistent on this, of all things.
My understanding of proper etiquette is that the gentleman presents the balance due at the beginning of the date, whether he is a close client or a stranger. If there is no payment up front, there is no date, and he forfeits the deposit. If he's a regular who prefers to pay after the date, then gently remind him before he leaves. If you don't, then it was a social interaction. What am I missing??
this is a foreseeable possibility when providers offer both escort services and "social time". I have seen many websites that charge a lesser rate for a no-sex dinner date than they do for full service. IMO, this two-tiered rate structure invites this kind of behavior. Is this much different than a guy who makes a reservation at a restaurant, confirms that they have a supply of Ribeyes for that evening, and when he gets there, he is not in the mood for a steak, so he orders the fish instead at half the price?
I used to have a regular who was a grad student at UCLA, and her offer for "social time" was that, if you booked two hours of full service at $500/hr, she would allow up to two hours out to dinner afterward for $75/hour. Because of her class schedule, she only saw one customer per day during a week, usually after 3:00p, and two on Saturdays, but according to her, about half the guys who saw her added the social time afterward and she didn't have to make herself dinner and clean up the kitchen after the session.
-- Modified on 7/16/2025 1:20:41 PM
In my experience, there usually is another side. Though, that doesn't make it the right side. But the only one who can provide the other side is the client. Did you post this here because you know or suspect the client is on these boards? That said, even if there is another side, it becomes a he said/she said situation. Either way, sorry to hear this happened.
I don’t know if the client is active here, but it would be interesting to hear his side of the story.
Why would you not tell him when he arrived that he owes you the full amount for the date he booked? I have policies in place that are listed on my website. I would not entertain social time instead of what was booked. 🤷🏽♀️ You need to let him know.
Always take money Up front as soon as he walks in so that you can start and focus on the session and your time is not being wasted(he should already know this and have the envelope ready without you asking).
Always check to see if the client is Already blacklisted.
Always check his Establshed references(meaning the references have a presence and many reviews).
Good luck next time🥰
So the gentleman in question I had only seen once before and he had booked a dominatrix session. Went fine, no issues. He sent me kind of a generic message (that is not that uncommon) after this session asking if I ever offer "discounts" and I told that yes, for some of my regulars I have worked out some arrangements. He says nothing further. Fast forward to our second date and he asked if we could do the meal date but he wanted to bring the food. He wanted to bring a vegetarian soup he had made. Sure, that will work! He shows up, we eat the soup, and then have a regular dominatrix session. He is getting ready to leave and I ask where my envelope is and he then replies "oh, I thought the SOUP was payment."
Who in the FUCK is making $450 soup?!? He is digging in his wallet and then proceeds to tell me that most of the money that was for our date he bought groceries with and he gave me the $182 he had in his wallet. He then says "UG, I forgot this is your job!!" REALLY??? Obviously I am not happy. He contacts me a few months later trying to book again and when I told him he still owed me for the last session he skipped out on and I never heard from him again. Lesson learned!!
A dinner date + dom session for a serving of vegetarian soup? That’s a classic.
I am seldom rendered speechless but this was one of those situations. I really think he thought he was going to sneak out without me noticing he did not leave the envelope and then say "I forgot and will pay you next time!!" and then next time never happens. I have always been very trusting of my clients but there is always one dirt ball like this that flucks it up for everyone. I will now need to confirm the money before anything happens. I really hate not being able to trust my clients but here we are.
Then "I forgot this is your job" is arguably even crazier.
Id probably stop offering discounts altogether after this experience. and would block him if he didn't pay in full within a week (circumstances pending of course but sounds like he's local).
Holy shit.
Wonder if it came with some crusty bread.. 😆
I'd need to know what exactly happened.
Were there any sexual services provided? Were they supposed to be provided as per agreement ?
He "changed it", in what way? Did he say something, call her, notify her in any way? Were they supposed to go to a dinner/date first as part of the date and then he just left? Like all of this matters.
Just feels like theres lack of information here to make any definitive judgement and it's inevitable to make assumptions that may not be true.
As told, it does sound like a rob, which is unacceptable, but really need to know more deets.
just an observation for those saying she should demand the payment up front and end things if not paid.
In a private in-call that might be possible, though comes with some risk to the provider, but if the meeting started in some public location that type of scene might be very undesirable for the provider and client. But in public she does have the option to walk away safely.
But as noted, when multiple services levels are offer some clarity on what the session is, what is due and what type of change/cancellation options there are should be known to both parties. If she just assumed that people would not change their option last minute (for whatever reason) and never mentioned the session tier being the committed schedule it might just be a learning experience. A small blister on the fingers but going forward she can avoid the problem with clear communications and not making assumptions about how people might act. (I think this points to a case were everyone here needs to at least think like a lawyer -- what are the details, where are the gaps in the agreement, what is assumed but not stated....
So...You gave up The Booger---Your client split without paying you.....well-----Life Lesson----Pay First on anything you can't repossess ! Sounds like he beat you out of the balance!
