No matter what propriety dictates, instinct for self-preservation (i.e., being ripped off financially or being jumped) is vital and should always be valued! Good move.
By the way, how much (percentage of total "donation") is a "typical" cancellation fee?
because something just didn't seem "right?" I suppose this question could apply to both hobbyists and ladies.
I recently cancelled about 18 hours before a previously scheduled meeting with a touring provider. Soemthing just didn't feel right to me and my "spidy" sense kicked into overdrive. I have learned to listen to that "spidy" sense thing over the years (since being drafted and serving Uncle Sam) and it has served me well.
In this case, the appoinment was too easy to schedule, no apparent reference check, the price was a bargain for what was advertised, and there was no contact with the lady; it was all through e mail with a scheduler. Yes the reviews on TER were there, but that didn't overcome the concern.
It could be that it was my loss, but going though with it wouldn't have worth the stress waitng for the door to open.
Have others had a similar experience?
She didnt ask you for references? You checked with the ladies you gave as references and they didnt hear from this girl? Not sure what you meant.
I try to do my research before everything else, but if something feels wrong, there's no reason to go through with it.
However, I always try to show some respect by canceling well ahead of time. Or offering some kind of cancellation fee.
... a need to offer a cancellation fee?
If the provider did not have any rules in regards to cancellation fees, why pay it?
If the provider cancels on you for whatever reason, is SHE going to pay you a cancellation fee? I doubt it.
Serpius
However, I always try to show some respect by canceling well ahead of time. Or offering some kind of cancellation fee.
To put it in simple terms for you, because it's the right thing to do. It's respecting the provider and her time. If she chooses to not to accept, that is on her.
For the record, in the less than a handful of times I have had to cancel, the guy was always offered extra time or a discount off if he chose to book with me again, even though I sprung for the food, hotel or incall, in the first damn place.
Let me clarify, that if a red flag goes up and it is her fault, I don't think the guy owes her a thing. Then again, one should know who the hell he is about to see before booking the damn appt. It is called research!
-- Modified on 11/26/2012 8:30:59 PM
Although I never had a gut feeling like that.
There has been a date or two that I should have cancelled.
Getting stuck at work, last minute shit like that.
I have pushed myself to make a date because, I didn't want to flake out last minute.
It suffered for it.
I am always a little nervous meeting for the first time. There is ALWAYS some risk. Be it very small.
To get over it I took advice from a dude here. (HarborHills i think)
To be honest. TGTBT usually is. Backchannel more.
If there's one thing NOT worth going to jail over its SEX.
you had some facts which didn't sit well with you besides or it set off that survival sense. You said it has served you well before. You go with it again.
I haven't had it happen with a provider. It's happened in other circumstances and I go with it.
if you were creeped out, you probably would not have had a good time. Either party has the right to cancel for any reason, with notice. You did that.
Got left hanging in a parking lot for 15 min past scheduled time. Started freaking.
I always say go with your gut it never steers you wrong.
If something does not feel right I decline to go anywhere my thoughts are better safe than sorry.
the longer you are in this hobby..the keener your sixth sense gets..you will need it..you can smell the dog before it even gets to the back {page} door..
I was new to TER . She was earning her College degree .
She had five or six TER reviews , donation was listed on her TER profile , another board, and her web site .
I sent her a PM from the other site . She told me to call , she wanted to hear my voice .
We talked on the phone once , I sang her a song . She didn't ask for references .
I made an appointment .
When I called the day of my appointment for the exact location ,{ her apartment } she asked me if I knew the donation was $$$ . I said yes under my breath .
My sixth sense said abort , it's a sting . My lustful loins told me don't stop new .
As soon as I walked in I greeted her like a GF I hadn't seen in a month .
No words and passionate kissing with clothes flying . She kissed back extremely well .
On the way in while kissing , before throwing her on the sofa ,
I discretely slid the donation under a book .
As I was walking out the door she asked if I forgot something .
"It's under the book on the table "
She went UTR before I had a chance to review her .
She has a new career , no longer on TER .
I was happy I took the first chance I had , every time I saw her .
I've been asked a few times since then if I forgot something .
I wouldn't take that chance in every city .
I recently cancelled about 18 hours before a previously scheduled meeting with a touring provider. Soemthing just didn't feel right to me and my "spidy" sense kicked into overdrive. I have learned to listen to that "spidy" sense thing over the years (since being drafted and serving Uncle Sam) and it has served me well.
In this case, the appoinment was too easy to schedule, no apparent reference check, the price was a bargain for what was advertised, and there was no contact with the lady; it was all through e mail with a scheduler. Yes the reviews on TER were there, but that didn't overcome the concern.
It could be that it was my loss, but going though with it wouldn't have worth the stress waitng for the door to open.
Have others had a similar experience?
The second one when added to her out of the norm questions - after already being "verified" - as the date drew near I decided to get a stomach virus and cancel.
I'd withdraw again to corner coffee shop again... where I'd not be conspicious. I could get a snack or a beverage. Depending on the response, I'd decide how long I was willing to hang around. Lots of people in/out of coffee shop, some using internet stay longer these days. So loitering is acceptable.
An alternative, would be to enter the hotel & shop their gift shop or other store.
Be careful who can overhear if you get a call. Just don't sit in the car... obviously waiting for the provider call.
That is if they are by trustworthy reviewers. But you did the right thing. Trust your instincts.
No matter what propriety dictates, instinct for self-preservation (i.e., being ripped off financially or being jumped) is vital and should always be valued! Good move.
By the way, how much (percentage of total "donation") is a "typical" cancellation fee?
Not last minute though.
She just didn't seem the same or as enthusiastic.
a great guy & superb time. We didn't exactly hit it off on the phone & we were both rude to each other lol.
No references & he didn't want to give other info, but I finally verified him.
Against my better judgement, I kept the appt & he turned out to be a super guy & an awesome returning client.
Once I had booked a provider via P411 and she had about 3 reviews on TER. The reviewers on TER had other reviews, so I had not digged deep. After making the appt, I was reading more through the reviews and found that the reviewers who had reviewed her seemed to be shills and all the girls that they reviewed had the same Booker, even though these girls were in other cities. And all the girls had 10/10 reviews. Even though I was sure they were not LE, I knew I might be in for a disappointment or a bait and switch or Upselling. So I cancelled. The provider is now no longer on P411.