have workshops to explore sexuality and fetishes.

Sexuality is best explored at your own pace where you just figure out what you like or not by trial and error... Just find a damn woman (civvie or P4P), get a hotel room and explore it damn it !!!

I would rather suggest workshops on writing, reading and basic math skills.

meanwhile we all know about everything right? or else we wont be here!

Posted By: CurlyW - Nats Fan

have workshops to explore sexuality and fetishes.

Sexuality is best explored at your own pace where you just figure out what you like or not by trial and error... Just find a damn woman (civvie or P4P), get a hotel room and explore it damn it !!!

I would rather suggest workshops on writing, reading and basic math skills.

We are not talking oral sex classes here (though look how popular threads and books and videos on the subject are!)  Kink includes things like: bondage restraints, cock and ball torture, electro-play, caning and flogging...

With kink, there are many types of play that can lead to serious injury if the players do not know what they are doing.  These are not things that a novice should just explore at their own pace and figure it out by trial and error!  At the *very least* one should read Jay Wiseman's "SM 101" before picking up the tools.  A class with demonstrations is not only fun, it provides an opportunity for explorers to ask very specific questions.  I'm happy to see this kind of education becoming more common and readily available!

If it sells, sell it.  Its not a bad idea to tell people what they should already know, or can figure out.

Like when I was in college, they had this etiquette dinner for the graduating class. Totally worthless.  Taught us how to eat salad and drink wine. The catering company charged hundreds of dollars per student...

I showed up all drunk at the dinner with few of my friends. Oh back then we were so reckless.  

I was referring to more like shitting, pissing, farting on someone's face

-- Modified on 12/14/2012 7:42:54 PM

especially with that movie coming out with that pretty face boy, dont remember the name.

Hilarious!

..as a former player in the BDSM community I have been to many workshops over the years.  In fact at one time I was known as the Rope Master in our community here in MN because of my rope and knot techniques which I shared at, yes, seminars.  They were a lot of fun and taught others how to play using ropes and bondage.  Same goes for electro sex, something I still very much enjoy.  Some of these techniques are best learned and shared in a group setting unless the guy or gal you are with in the hotel room knows what they are doing.  And, BTW, hotel rooms?  Nah, try renting a soundproof dungeon so your screams of pleasure as well as the sound of the whip cracking on skin will not disturb others.  Yeah, reading, writing and whip cracking, all great skills to learn in class. LOL



-- Modified on 12/14/2012 7:39:03 PM

Smart gal

Exactly what I thought as well.

For those of us who play on the darker side....it's advisable to know what you're doing.  To practice on some unsuspecting soul can be a bad idea.  But many go that route...and learn together without formal training.

I have plenty of ProDomme gal pals that have shown me more than a few tips...and it was fun to learn  

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1v83GqhUuUg

-- Modified on 12/14/2012 8:18:36 PM

Great, Curley!  I'd seen it before but only now noticed the woman grinding on the washing machine has a dog collar on!

But it's funny how some of my TER buds have tried it while playing here...and they really like the "darker side".

And it is best to learn from the Pros....even something as basic as a prostate massage  LOL

On the flip side...I enjoy taking those supposedly "innocent" GFE gals and play bondage games with them.  Some like it (and I suspect they have played before  LOL)...while others it's not their cup of tea.  But they play along and let me have my fun.  At least once  

One thing to realize for players like me is that I won't do something with a gal that I haven't experienced myself.  It's all part of knowing how something feels...and gives me an indicator of what the gal should be experiencing.

And @mnjohnny247....TENS play is a lot of fun...YEP

I agree it's not, but many who actually experience the power exchange for the first time actually like it.  There is something that appeals to our darker side by either giving up power or taking it from another (consensually that is).  I played for years as a Dom and yet as I have matured have become more of a switch (for those who don't know the lingo, a switch is one who plays as either a Dom or a sub).  And talk about the gals here, well, I introduced one very hot young woman to rope bondage one time and just before our next session she texted me with “I want you to tie me up”  Okaaaayyy then, glad to help.  I also agree that it is always best to experience various activities before practicing on someone else's body.  One needs to know what the feeling is and how to moderate impact play and rope tightness and the best way to know is to experience it.  Also, TENS and violet wand play are quite ahhh.... stimulating... oh yeah they are!!  Now where the hell are those leads???  LOL





-- Modified on 12/14/2012 9:38:10 PM

After long experience, they may get bored and want to try new things.

I remember reading something about how Jolie would cut herself in the middle to have blood while doing it. (I swear I read this somewhere years ago)

But with the confident and comfort comes expansion to another territory. I certainly can't see college gals whipping each other after a beer party.

And after certain age, you get less experimental. Around mid 30s sounds about right.

-- Modified on 12/15/2012 12:00:33 AM

can be lots of fun

all i gotta say bout it

That is where I draw the line!
Shock me, whip me, whatever. Keep those freaky things in the box!

I eventually will do this whole thing. This thread confirms something for me.
You have to be a subbie before you should dominate. I was thinking more for mental reasons. Now I see someone could get hurt bad if the other is inexperienced.
It always seemed fake to me.

As a "young" member in the "lifestyle". Most of us think 50 shades is bs. It's the old repressed housewives that buy into it. Not us. We came into kink earlier than the gen before us, thanks to the internet. 50 shades is nothing but some vanilla extrapolation of what the lifestyle is.

Also, I'm into D/s, but not S&M. Can't really have a workshop for D/s

+1
Very very true.

What I see on TER seems to just mostly be S&M. There doesn't seem to be other aspects of BDSM represented, like Dominance and submission, and the psychological aspects.

Posted By: ChgoCPA

But it's funny how some of my TER buds have tried it while playing here...and they really like the "darker side".

And it is best to learn from the Pros....even something as basic as a prostate massage  LOL

On the flip side...I enjoy taking those supposedly "innocent" GFE gals and play bondage games with them.  Some like it (and I suspect they have played before  LOL)...while others it's not their cup of tea.  But they play along and let me have my fun.  At least once  

One thing to realize for players like me is that I won't do something with a gal that I haven't experienced myself.  It's all part of knowing how something feels...and gives me an indicator of what the gal should be experiencing.

And @mnjohnny247....TENS play is a lot of fun...YEP

Sexual variety and exploration keeps going further and further, until it goes off the deep end, until it has gone over the sexual cliff!... What ever happened to plain ol' vanilla sex? Have deviance and perversion become the new normalcy?! (And we have the audacity to comment on our society in other threads!...)
With the advent of mass-circulated pornography and its explosion over the internet, there seems to be no end in sight! What effects might this have not only on our hobby but, more importantly, for society writ large?
What started as a little oral stimulation (BBBJ) has evolved evolved into snowballing, CIF and Bukake! What started out as DO and anal has expanded to A2M and felching. And that's not even getting into BDSM! Where does it end? When will it end? Several of the ladies have PMed me on my similar questions, stating that much of this as well as the things guys are asking for, are coming out of the porn industry and their products. I read somewhere online that the two most popular activities now are BBBJ and cum in face. CIF?! Really, what's so damn exciting about shooting your load in a lady's face?! That's so mysogynistic and degrading! (And bukake is 10 x worse...) And I imagine that many a provider, in her concern about being competitive and to make money, consents to this crap. Would be nice if the ladies established SOME boundaries. Would be even nicer if we gents wouldn't make them feel pressured and just not ask for this kinkier and kinkier stuff...
Just my $0.02.....

Most sessions that have any real BDSM components are never reviewed.  Hence you won't find much on here discussing this aspect of BDSM.

But to honestly think it isn't happening A LOT is naive  

Posted By: ChinaRose

What I see on TER seems to just mostly be S&M. There doesn't seem to be other aspects of BDSM represented, like Dominance and submission, and the psychological aspects.

Posted By: ChgoCPA

But it's funny how some of my TER buds have tried it while playing here...and they really like the "darker side".

And it is best to learn from the Pros....even something as basic as a prostate massage  LOL

On the flip side...I enjoy taking those supposedly "innocent" GFE gals and play bondage games with them.  Some like it (and I suspect they have played before  LOL)...while others it's not their cup of tea.  But they play along and let me have my fun.  At least once  

One thing to realize for players like me is that I won't do something with a gal that I haven't experienced myself.  It's all part of knowing how something feels...and gives me an indicator of what the gal should be experiencing.

And @mnjohnny247....TENS play is a lot of fun...YEP

To each their own

If these activities are an affront to you....you needn't explore them with anyone.

But the reality is that many guys/gals enjoy more than a MISH fuck.

The interesting part of your dissertation is that you believe that the gals feel degraded...project much?

Re: To each their own - It's MORE than just that; we should be honest with ourselves.

My friend, you are simplifying and misconstruing what I was trying to say. To try a variety of positions (CG, RCG, Asian CG. Doggie, Lazy Doggie, etc) beyond the vanilla sex Mush is one thing. However, when we cross over into areas that are humiliating,  degrading or which are perceived as riskier/more dangerous, then we hobbyists are only lying to ourselves to get more providers to perform such specific serviced for our own selfish pleasure. But we can't face up to the truth, many times, because we don't like to do so. That is why many providers, even here on TER, only offer CBJ rather than
the more popular BBBJ. Yet the ladies feel pressured to give  it to remain competitive. I have known some providers who even feel the same about the taboo BBFS. If you ever bothered to talk to and actually get to know some of these ladies, some will tell you when they let their guard down that they really don't enjoy doing many of the items on their menus.  They do admit that some acts are dirty, degrading. They feel filthy, subhuman. As a result, they will disassociate from their feelings and their emotions. They will further separate their work persona from their real-life persona. And, yes, many will and do drink and take drugs to forget what the hell they are doing with strange men. Many times they force themselves to do it for the money they need or so strongly desire to achieve their plan/goal. Perhaps its easier on the providers seeing fewer clients a week than on those seeing five or more a day. And its even more exacerbated and more visible with the streetwalkers doing even more guys a day. Why, I've even read comments from providers here that if they saw more than x amount of guys a week, that they'd lose their soul. Interesting choice of words, don't you think? Now why would a lady here ever express that in those words???

Don't break your arm there patting yourself on the back  LOL

And your reality is just that...YOURS

To extrapolate that this gig is dehumanizing and radically different than what most folks feel about their daily grind is pretty narrow minded.  MOST folks do not enjoy the jobs they are in...some also have those same feelings working for assholes that require them to do "things" they don't want to do.

And since slavery has been abolished for quite a few years...each worker has the option of either doing the tasks they get paid to do...or find something else to do.

So when some hooker tells you how much she hates X, Y and Z...tell her to change her job.  But most won't or can't....money talks and BS walks.

Just sayin  

Sure they continue doing it for the money. For many women left with young children and deadbeat dads or immigrant women supporting large families in poverty-stricken countries, there is not much of a realistic choice as they need the quickly-earned large amounts of cash to assist their destitute, desperate families and so will lower their boundaries, swallow their pride, hold their nose and do whatever it takes to be competitive and make the money. However, it doesn't make some things that they may do any less onerous, demeaning,  disagreeable or make such services more acceptable or less dehumanizing to them. On the other hand, there are plenty of greedy women out there who may still elect to participate in demeaning acts/services when the only negative impact on them, if they didn't,   may be a few less customers a week and perhaps another 6-12 months in the biz to reach their goal. But you are right in that, at that point, its their decision in how much or how quickly they want to make their money. Of course, you could say that many (civie) women still give it away - until they get "smart" and start charging us for these same acts/services. And its all on a continuum from disagreeable work to debasing/dehumaninzing work to immoral/illegal work to work that brings harm to others. And both desperate and greedy people will do all this work if they truly need the money or if their greed overrides any existence of a conscience. I am sure that for many, it is a balance between meeting the need for money and answering to their conscience and integrity as to what point they jump off that continuum.