Have you ever had a fantasy about something that made u feel so guilty and ashamed that you would never tell a soul?
Do share I cant be the only one

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I can't think of any sexual fantasies that I haven't explored that are very exciting to talk about. Maybe if they involved other areas of human interaction there might be some fantasies, but even those are rather ordinary. Nothing remarkable at all. Maybe, in P4P terms, having a provider suck me while I'm out to dinner with a civvie date. You know, making small talk and sipping a drink while the escort is on her knees beside the table. That's kind of abstract though. I don't think that's what you're looking for.

In other areas, having some guards with me while I insult some dude at the bar until he jumps up at me, and then watching as the guards "restrain" him and escort him out of the bar. But that has nothing to do with sex, just violence. Of course, I could extend it, like if I had a dumb rich blonde with me to fuck afterwards. But all in all, I guess I'm pretty vanilla.

You have fantasies and even use her as inspiration on a few masturbatory sessions.

Actually, was a friend's mom who was just gorgeous!  She'd divorced a real low life but never really dated again as her kids were growing up.  I was about 13 when starting dreaming of her.

Fantasy was I'd visit when only she was home working in the yard in a tank top and short shorts, she'd invite me inside and we'd talk for a bit in the kitchen.  She'd be leaning into the counter, putting faint but discernible pressure on her mound, and meanwhile the AC would bring her nipples to attention.  She'd excuse herself to take a shower and clean up, but invite me to stay around -- and then leave the doors open as she goes back for a shower.
Unable to resist, I'd have to sneak back and see her showering.  She'd catch me jerking off and instead of getting angry, she'd open the glass shower door and invite me in.
I'd bathe her shimmering, naked body with trembling hands, rubbing her warm, soft skin without a clue what to do next.  She'd take control and show me what she liked and how she liked it.  Eventually we'd end up in the bedroom and finally lay, spent & sated, cuddled for a few moments until hearing the garage door opener churning.
Sudden mad dash to get dressed, her juices still on my cock and my cum drying on her belly, and then leap into the kitchen to pretend nothing happened.  Of course I'd have to stay over for dinner afterwards, but would be unable to tell my friend that I'd finally had sex!

And saw that a lot of people have the same fantasies. I felt guilty and ashamed for years, and I thought I was sick. I'm glad I found all those kinky folks on FL.

The other fantasy I will most likely have to do a request post. After receiving alias ability.  

I have a list of extremely vanilla fantasies, See Video.

When I was 12 I would ride my bike down to a block of shops that had a massage parlor in it, and then call the massage parlor from a nearby pay phone (remember those?). The phone was always answered by "Melita", who had the sweetest voice and one of those really nice sounding southern accents, like from Georgia. She was more than happy to tell me what she was wearing, and what she looked like, but she would never stick her head outside the door. My fantasy was that I could go in there one day and meet her, and get one of her mysterious massages.

Likewise, at the same age I would go to car and boat shows and see these hot models in front of the latest products. I was just aching for one of them to take me into a camper or boat. All I wanted was to be overwhelmed by all that hotness, feel those sexy bikinis pressed up against me, and have that 20-something model have her way with my 12 year old self

That I have been seeing for 7 years has recently been teasing me with rape fantasies.  And now that she has planted that seed I must admit I want her that way.