Don't mean to stir the pot, but how do you know when paying for sex is right for you?

I think a lot of guys get in the hobby for all the wrong reasons. Like if you just want sex, and nothing else that goes along with being with women and other people, and you are well off financially, then yea.

For me, I found that pursuing women could be like man's principle pleasure in life. It's not even so much about how much sex you get, like sure there is sex to let you know how well you did, but it's not really the purpose of doing it. Like you get a trophy after a game, but you don't play the game for the trophy, know what I'm saying.

And I'll admit, my game is not always that tight, and so I slip sometimes, and supplement with pay for play cauze getting just sex is better than getting nothing, lol nobody is perfect

So just curious why do you hobby

I hobby because I got no game and I was tired of letting ass fall through my fingers are see lesser guys doing better than me. I said why gamble continue to destroy my confidence and self-worth when there is a sure thing out here? Also I lost my viriginity late by most standards(23) so I guess I'm trying to compensate for those two things. Why do you hobby?

I'm married, but after having lived that life for over a decade I wouldn't be in any rush to start dating and dealing with all the BS that comes with it if my wife and I were to split up. Especially not now that I've discovered the hobby. I have no interest in chasing women as a game, never have.

and sex, when I have the opportunity for such. Don't have time for a chasin.

You pay for it one way or the other. Might as well call a provider and get to the objective than fuck around with the preliminaries.

Whattya think?

I'm having serious visuals!

That is my cover story if I ever get outed to my family.
Mostly it was to get get down wit sum nasty hot-ass bitches who stay da fuck away till I wanna be wit em. Boy-ee.








HalfHour

You have a PM coming.

it is never...ever...EVER...free. Let's not bullshit ourselves. This is way cheaper long term, and obviously way fuckin' easier.

To get laid by women who wouldn't give me the time of day unless I pay them.  It's simple, don't complicate it.

...Everyone is in the hobby. What makes a "hobbyist" different from a guy who bends over backwards to get a mortgage, maintain a steady career, and cuts corners on his own spending just to please the woman he wants to be with? In one form or another a guy pays for it. If some guys want to do all that for just one woman or to cut all that out and pay for it directly with different women it all comes down to the same thing. That has always been the way of the world. A beautiful women isn't going to marry just any guy. She's going to make sure he has cash, prestige, and social status. It comes down to her instinct to find a guy to provide for her survival.
But who says it has to be just one guy? A guy's biggest drive is to copulate with someone he is attracted to. And we all know that we are attracted to different types of women...we want a taste of the different flavors.
So what it comes down to is that we provide what the women want, and they provide what we want. Whether its a guy spending $500,000 on a house for one woman or spending that much on many women, its all the same. If its a woman who commits to one guy who she knows that will give her all that or many guys who, altogether, will give her that its still the same. Its the way we are as a species. That is just the way it has always been.

As has already been said, to get laid by beautiful women that otherwise would probably not give me the time of day.  And like others, I have no game when it comes to picking up girls either, nor do I have the patience for civvie dating.

Let's face it, whether you have sex with a provider or sex with a civvie, you are paying for it, one way or another.  It's just easier with a provider.

Swim

Hey, I think I know where you coming from. Believe it or not, long long time ago I also had no game and my first experience was also with a provider.

>>>why gamble continue to destroy my confidence and self-worth when there is a sure thing out here?

Man, I know how those rejections seem to just eat at the ego. In the beginning it sucks the most, as you are seeking that external validation. I would encourage you to try and approach 5-10 girls a day - some are not going to be nice, some will be pissed off, don't care, just do it and do it continuously over a month or so and at some point you'll stop taking it personally and YOU WILL CLOSE!!!

Just a few pointers - do not blow your wallet on dates, just go to a park or something simple. Be bold, love yourself for who you are and don't set high expectations FOR YOURSELF, talk, elicit value, escalate with touching/kissing/making out, isolate to a private location where you can enjoy each others company. THATS IT!!

I bet, in a few months You'll start to see this  as a fun and amusing experience. YOU LIFE WILL IMPROVE!!! I GUARANTEE YOU!

If you need more info on the whole thing - just look on google, there is tonns of stuff to help get started. Man, I really wish you to try it for yourself, I used to be in the same situation myself, and just found it to be depressing and hobby was like just some painkiller, that did not solve anything

>> Why do you hobby?
HAHA, I was trying to stay monogamous in LTR and let my game go, and I wanted something quick and sure thing. But I don't hobby much. There is nothing wrong with hobby, but as I said, I think some of us get in it for wrong reasons to cover up deeper issues, and then you just post pone them, cause it's like hey- I'm getting laid, who cares, but those are solvable issues and every man needs to get over them.

How sad that--- You all seem to be like a Woman that has been jaded by men. She doesn't treat a new relationship as such. I'm sure she carries baggage of the bad experriences.

It's all about our choices. To the men that feel less than attractive or powerfull. "Do you actually want a woman to want you for those reasons"???? Instead of you, and what you are inside????  Silly men!

I agree! This is Less work... I'm sure it's all about sex right??? Not so! I have had dates in which we both enjoy drinks, dinner and expect
nothing in return. We are at a mutual understanding of why we are here!

I believe that--- for every great man- theres a Great woman.

Havent you notice that happy couple actually look alike??? We date who we are!


I'm a true believer in Real Love. Minus the mind games---but thats why you need to be smart about whom we date.

As most of you have mentioned- "The games"
agreed- I wish people would have a sign that says what their needs and wants are.

However, It is what it is.... Be Honest with yourself, besides  your needs and wants.  No need to talk less about the others.

Everyone wants to be loved....

Good Luck to all.
V

I have not been in it long, but eventually realized that I'm not a good compromiser. There is tremendous amount of compromise in a LTR. I still enjoy flirting and trying to pick up chicks in bars. (I'm bad at it)

I think it's a bad idea to hobby in lieu of social interaction, and I fantasize that there is someone out there perfect for me and we'll both just be ourselves and happy ever after blah blah, but maybe not. It may never happen., people are just too fucked up and conflicted, myself included.

So hobby is a nice deal. Whatever for an hour or 2 and then back to our respective lives. It's genius really.