Today is a very sad day for me. A provider I had been seeing steadily for almost 18 months, and pretty much weekly for the last year, decided she was not going to keep her word about making up some sessions she promised she would.
She was my first venture in the hobby, and had been seeing each other for a while. As it happens from time to time, she came down with something and didn't feel well enough to do anything after she arrived. On the two ocassions, she volunteered to make up the sessions so I didn't think much of it.
Well, the make-up sessions never came and never came. No offer of any kind ever came for several months. So, I start dropping hints in several emails only to be told she doesn't owe me anything. No problem, I'll try again some other day in another way. So, I offer a 9-hour long session and suggest a special rate with an explanation thinking this is a win-win for both. This was a dismal failure as well.
All attempts to be patient and forthright about the promised sessions have resulted in her blowing up, calling me some really nasty names and making some very rude comments. And as you can guess, she is in TOTAL denial and now has no intention of making up the sessions at this point so I am just out of luck.
I thought this provider had integrity. Her old Web Site stated that she "loathed" people that did not keep their word. Over the months, she recounted how people she trusted had taken advantage of her and how some clients stiffed her on their last session. Boy, was I taken in! At least I can say I did not do the same to her.
In hindsight, I should have asked for the make-up sessions within the next 30 days. If they were not going to occur, then I should have moved on. Don't be taken in as I was.
Yes, I have thought about naming names, but there is always the "retaliation" factor since she knows where I live. On the other hand, I tend to think that people eventually get everything they deserve. I think I now know why other people felt they needed to take advantage of her.
I thought I would share!
If you are not going to "out" her why share this tripe. I mean you never give the circumstances or the history between you two. Does she take money for services not rendered? What this a play for sympathy? Poorly done mate. I won't be the one to tell you what a sap you are being. Why trust anyone in this profession? Do you think she trusts you?
-- Modified on 7/10/2006 3:00:23 AM
I agree, if you're going to take the time to sing the blues, make it worth while for everyone who chooses to take the time to read about it by NAMING NAMES.
NSF
Why name names? If this did happen why put yourself through more aggravation?
A few things posted in the main note don't add up but I think if the provider promised make up sessions and didn't make them up in a timely matter (you did say you were seeing this person weekly) then in my mind I would piece together that she is not going to make them up, simple rational thought.
You have to remember no one owes anybody a thing here. You are paying for the ladies time, nothing more. You need to remember this.
There are some providers out there who I gather like to take advantage of their clients because they view them as weak this goes with the territory. Also ladies I wrote some providers, not ALL providers.
I mean if you saw her weekly for the past year you must have had SOME good times right? Move on.
How do you think providers feel when drop them ? Time to go to the shopping list and move on. I think you are taking this way to seriously. I have heard all types of stories where guys prepay and don't get a few hours. One thing to remember there are 2 sides to a story. When you hear the other side (from the provider) you are likely to change your mind, just my two cents worth.
there are 2 sides to every story. What made her want to stop seeing you in the first place? Also, why did you pay her if she showed up and didn't do anything???
Experienced hobbyists never fall into the trap that you fell into. Your recollections will help Newbies avoid your experience. There is value in your recounting, but little to none in outing the provider.
Take your experience with her as learning. In this business, never give credit. Pay for services rendered. On the occasions that she showed up and could not perform, a refusal fee would have been appropriate, nothing else
Gothicman is RIGHT. Don't name the name, just learn from the experience. I did a bad review and got threatened. By telling the story, you help newbies from making the same mistake.
Naming names only works on a level playing field. And this ain't no level field. Too many things could go wrong with naming names. While I have a great ATF, I doubt she'd let me catch her the next time if I was short (I would never ask anyway). It's a two-way street, learn like I did. 
-- Modified on 7/9/2006 6:40:08 PM
I'm not very motivated by revenge or anything like that, but he did state that, 'she came down with something and didn't feel well enough to do anything after she arrived', and never made it up to him. I don't know where you or this guy hobbies, but, where I live we are talking high hundreds if not thousands of dollars just hanging out there, which is enough to piss anyone off.
I would not come into this forum and say what he said unless all other avenues had been taken to set things straight with the ATF. If I was going to sack up and write that, I would follow through and throw out the name. Thankfully, I've never been in his shoes.
I do agree that this is good info for the newbie board though, as there are plenty of us who could learn a thing or two from the experience.
NSF
WSID, you wrote a bad review and got threatened for it? Was it written out of anger or a truthfully told account of a bad experience with a provider?
In this case, what can you do? I mean if it really was a bad experience and you are being truthful but not mean to the provider then what gives? Isn't that what reviews are for? To weed out the providers that don't give you a good experience as opposed to the ones that do?
Or should you just post good reviews and forget posting bad ones? Seems like that is why this site is here to give BOTH good and bad accounts.
Yet another ugly side of this hobby....
... why the heck did she show up if she's not feeling well? cuz she wanted the $, that's why! let's be real, this guy was suckered from the beginning. sounds to me that she showed with no intentions of anything but parting him from his money.
i also strongly disagree that there is no value in outing the provider. the account as stated is a straight rip-off after gaining his trust; i for one would like to know who the provider is so that i can avoid her like the plague!
If you "out" her she will sick her 250 pound football player boyfriend on you. You want that on your conscious?
Inapproprite.... removed by the poster.
-- Modified on 7/9/2006 6:49:34 PM
1. They are female, they may be a great GFE or your ATF but they are still women.
2. They are great actresses.
3. Great actresses make for great con artist.
Sorry this happened to you man. Live, learn and move on.
Im sorry to say but it sounds like she played you. The 1st time she supposedly came down with something you should have said farewell and walked out with your donation. I dont know about outing her if you are worried about retaliation. This is a tough situation to be in. Sometimes you have to just take the loss. This happens to everyone on each side of this hobby. You establish trust and sometimes get burned. You sound like a nice guy. Im sorry this happenned to you. Alyssa
with everyone so far and say that this guy definitely should not name names. The fact is that he sounds obsessed and crazy and she probably cut him loose for a darn good reason. I really have to feel it for the ladies--there sure are a lot of stalkers out there.
What happened to you is a major reason I don't do outcalls. Once they're in your hotel room, you're stuck.
But come on man! If she's too ill or whatever to service you then why did she come over in the first place? Oh I know! She told you, 'I didn't want to break my commitment to you'. She just forgot to add 'but I still won't do you even though I'm taking your money'.
You got hosed. Plain and simple. Never had any intention of making up shit. Cause she counted on your 'good nature' (aka, being a sap) not to make an issue of it.
Get pissed, name names and don't do another outcall ever again!
-- Modified on 7/11/2006 6:47:44 PM
You know she won't take an IOU for a session, so just out of general principle you better not give a provider money for the session later. It's not like either of you could turn it over to a collection agency. Moreover, memories about money hardly ever match, and record-keeping is not advisable in the business.
I have had a woman call and cancel the day of the appointment. No money exchanged hands then. That would have been the way for her to handle it rather than show up "feeling bad." What's wrong with reduced price for Russian or French then?
Not4lng was right.
Which is why when the subject of provider friendship comes up and people always ask - would you loan her money? the answer (from my perspective) is always the same... "NO" but I would not loan any other friend money either...
Even with "paper work" and a "paper trail" it just makes for bad friendships....
I agree, she should have just called and said "I am not up to it!" That would have been much better.
a real girl friend experience.
Complete with emotional outbursts and fights over money.
No harm in how you related this. It's a good cautionary tale for others.
Likewise, it is up to you whether to name names or not. If it could increase any possibility of harm to you, you are under no obligation to us to reveal who the person is.
There are plenty of fish in the sea. Keep fishing.
Got one of those going on myself... and will just say.. fishers advice of plenty of fish in the sea is wise advice to follow!!
Dude if any of us are not prepared to lose a couple a grand in this hobby, then we ought not to hobby. Losing money is the best thing that can happen
The Templars were all gay and/or celibate. Bad choice of alias, bud.
Why stick around her only to suffer such abuse? Christ, get going with some new hotties (notice the plural?). May I suggest the "reviews" button above?
Thanks to all who took the time to share your perspective. I appreciate your insights and gained from them. It was a definite live and learn situation.
All the best!
...are you saying you saw the same woman more than once?