Idk if it's just me but I feel like I'm never fully satisfied. I keep searching for the perfect provider but no one scratches that itch, I'll see multiple girls a week and most leave me feeling bored and unsatisfied if I'm being honest but I'll never tell them that cause I don't like putting others down so I'll pretend it was great. I can't enjoy it unless heavily on substances. I do have ragular ladies I see who are sweet and I enjoy their company but it still feels like something is always missing. I just feel like it's a never ending search, I chose this lifestyle to avoid the drama, and effort and searching for the perfect one just to do the same thing I thought I opted out of.

Your experiences are all transactional. If you have to abuse substances you're doing it all wrong. You should be able to enjoy this hobby life sober and still have a blast. Maybe it's you & not the providers.

Yep---It's You..........................................................!

You can’t always get what you want.

then you will never be happy.

Personally, seeing a few different ladies every week wouldn’t work for me either. If I wanted to see a lady frequently, it would have to be an ATF that I built a real connection to, but that’s expensive and hard to find. Since I tend to hobby around, I find spacing them out more makes sessions better. If what you’re doing isn’t working, maybe try waiting longer and building the anticipation up more.

There would be no shame in that. This realm isn't for everyone. But there are a number of red flags in what you said that suggest there may be some truth to what I am saying.
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If you are genuinely bored most of the time with beautiful women who are eager to please you sexually, then maybe its time to leave p4p behind and try the civie online dating, perhaps.
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I'll admit that some dates are better than others, but I can't honestly say I have ever been bored in p4p. I do get burned out from time to time, but that's something entirely different. For me, the solution is to take a break, and maybe that's what you need too.
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Stepping away and reassessing can be a healthy thing. Take a month or two off and see how you feel afterward. If you don't miss it, you will ll have your answer. That approach has always worked for me, which is why I intentionally build breaks in and step away from the demimonde two or three times a year. I almost always come back feeling refreshed, rejuvenated, and excited about it again. In the very rare case I dont, I stay away a bit longer until I do.
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Maybe what you need is a little self care is all. The one thing you said that genuinely concerns me is that you feel the need to be "heavily on substances" when you play. I am not going to ask what you mean by that specifically, because that's your business and not mine, but it might be worth looking into the reasons as to why that is. Tbh, at a first glance, it does sound unhealthy, however.
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I am not judging you at all. It may simply help to have someone you trust, possibly a professional, to work through some of this with you, sort it all out, and offer guidance, support and a different path. Give it some thought, give yourslef some time and good luck with it all.

Sorry you’re having those feelings, but it sounds like you already go into each booking “glass half empty”. Attitude is the determining factor to make or break any experience. This hobby isn’t cheap, so if you’re leaving unsatisfied something needs to change, or take a break.  

I still do civie dating here and there but after a breakup I had a while back I feel like it's pointless and can't take it seriously and I get bored even faster when I gotta put the effort into something I doubt will last and be meaningful. I think I'm just becoming bored of everything that use to be fun not just this hobby, maybe your right and I'm over doing it

I feel like it's rough cause I do crave when things feel "real" and I feel "loved" but I do not want a real civie relationship cause that comes with it's own problems, breakups, drama, I been there done that so I try to creat the perfect fantasy of it, the type of fantasy you'd have in your head. I guess I wanna "have my cake and eat it to" I'm trying to remove the negatives from both and make something perfect with the best of both worlds.

I would say just enjoy the search.  I often feel the same way and that’s why i am always searching for new partners.   And even when I do find someone who checks all the boxes, the meet ups tend to eventually get stale after multiple visits.   The search is part of what I find exciting.  Who will be behind the door or show up.  The anticipation of mtg/hooking up with a new strange partner is exhilarating.    

Beyond that, even "fake" relationships take effort.
First, repeat visits, then establishing your expectations and both your boundaries.

it's very definition is not a real-life relationship, to be an equal substitute for a civvie girlfriend, then perhaps your expectations-bar is too high.  For me, the best of both worlds is to use P4P as a fallback position that provides an NSA sexual release when I am BETWEEN real-life girlfriends.  

Parts of this sounds familiar. I been going through something kinda similar. After a divorce a few years ago I decided I never wanted a serious relationship again but lately I’ve been seeing some stuff in myself that makes me think I actually want a relationship again. Maybe. At least some part of me.  

Forgive me for reversing the Costanza maxim, but, in this case, it fits.

Ie is it predictability and routine?

Yes I am thinking sugar dating might be good. I am just a perfectionlist and I do want a sort of relationship but one that's focused on being a service for me, I think I need a good role player cause I want to script everything from words to acts.

I don't actually want something real, I could never commit to one. I want someone who will act and play the role but it's just acting. That way I do not need to bother with real dating if all the boxes are being checked. I want a outlit to dump my emotions and "love" onto someone who will never leave as long as I pay and will say all the words I want to hear, do all the acts I want all while I'm free to do this with as many providers as I can and I get a huge dopamine hit from feeling loved, feeling like I have someone wanting me more than anyone in the universe, even if it's fake the dopamine is real and the substance use helps me forget what's real and what's fake, I'm really into mdma and that alone controls your emotions perfectly for this fantasy but I mix it with other stuff too like cannabis, psychedelics and blow.

I don't enjoy things I can't control so it's not that, I it's more being disappointed  with encounters that didn't go the way I wanted them to, not saying it was bad it just wasn't what I was hoping for. I am not attracted to looks and actually prefer a more average, humble, mature and heavier looking girl that you'd never guess is a provider. Personality and the fantasy of being deeply loved and the center of someones world is what does it for me. I am trying to find girls who are good at role play for this but nothing really hits so I'm bored of a search that feels pointless, mdma helps me believe the fantasy cause emotions are just chemicals and that substance will control my emotions and make the fantasy feel real in the moment and a more basic looking girl makes the fantasy feel real as well, like if people see us in public nobody would think she's a model or gold digger but a regulary ordinary girl who is head over heels obsessed with me. The goal is to find a girl who fits this description and get intoxicated enough with her to make the whole fantasy come to life

My take is you are really looking for something that is not just simple, straightforward transactional sex and interaction. Maybe deep down you think there is something immoral or looking for some replacement for an intimate relationship ---like I said that is ALL just speculation not a claim that is the case. But I think you might want to do a bit of soul search about what you want and why you're playing in this playground.

that you want to eat your cake and have it too.

Sounds to me like you need to get into the high quality KGirls. Their illusion of passion is top tier.

Take a month or 2 off.

I got into the same rut, booking any traveler that visited, seeing multiple new ladies every week.  It can get boring or unsatisfying. Once in a while you’ll get someone that gives you a truly exhilarating time but the majority won’t.  It’s an addiction.  When I hit that wall,  I discovered that when I took the $600-800 I was going to spend on a provider and bought myself something nice and tangible that I wouldn’t otherwise get, I discovered there were better ways for me to spend my money and to achieve some level of happiness.  For me, that day I bought myself a super fancy espresso maker with that money.  I enjoy it every day and it reminds me how much of a waste it can be just booking providers to feed that addiction rather than just occasionally when you’re really in the mood.  

OK, so I'm glad this is a much more localized problem than the global one I thought it was.

could not do better for a simulated all-in GFE that has a real feel, but how many Kgirls do you know that will welcome a guy that needs to be high on substances to enjoy the session?  There are some out there, and I've reviewed a few, but it's not at all common.  Nevertheless, he should try it and see how it goes, just like you said.

Never seen kgirls I typically go black or latina but ik some in my area I been keeping my eye on, I just am not into thin or young women and they all seem young and thin lol, worth a try though. I think rolling together would be fun but I need a girl who's fun and without limits to really enjoy that, I like to mix all the substances and go wild and need that energy from a girl, nothing like blacking out together

To be honest that sound like a symptom of clinical depression. I often think I have gone though some periods like that in life and I think it can be pretty mild for many people but you might consider exploring the reason and how best to get past it.

You’ve tried and tried and tried and found P4P escorts aren’t working for you. The “Erotic Highway” forum has lots of good advice and input.

Reading this explanation I’m thinking that you might be better off investing in one of the expensive, life-like sex dolls. I don’t think there are many humans who will fit your needs.  
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Oh, and when you find a ‘young’ KGirl let us know. The vast majority are 35 and older. Virtually everyone I know wishes they were younger.

For some men, We search our life away looking to fill a void that is impossible to fill. This hobby is wonderful if you keep it outside of your head and dont let it rent space in there. Once you allow it to rent space you will be in a constant mindset of turmoil against yourself.

First of all, when I’m staring down a juicy 25-year old’s pussy from six inches just before inserting my tongue, or just before she engulfs junior with her mouth and lips, I’m never feeling bored! Hopefully your poor word choice there is just a result of your 420 lifestyle!  
Every now and then when I’m on a rampage, and I’m seeing 2-3 girls a week, I will get “Monger fatigue” for lack of a better word. My solution is to dial it back a notch. I might force myself onto a weekly schedule, and I will see a few of my ATF’s, and treat myself to a few providers I consider to be premium (higher price and for special occasions). I will wait to book until I’m really horny and anxious to book a session! This strategy increases my anticipation and desire, and it usually resolves the fatigue. Of course I would also recommend going in with a clear mind and body! That way you might actually be able to stay in the moment and savor the exquisite feast in front of you provided by one of our sexy goddesses who willingly quench our desires! No cause for boredom there…. Ever!