Paystub sounds reasonable to me. If you dont want to give out info.
A topic was brought up on the newbie board about not wanting to give out info.So gentleman I wonder how you like to be screened. In the age of serial killers and freaks and LE. How do you all think is the best way to keep both of us safe?
As this has been discussed before...
once again..
the purpose of screening is for the lady to be able to feel safe and comfortable with you and to , at least have some assurance that you are not LE.
To that end, any information a lady asks me I will offer.
Reputable ladies will not ask you anything out of line, and will not keep your information.
It is for her protection. The more you give her the more comfortable she will be.
The more comfortable she feels with you, the better your time together will be.
Just my opinion...
B
-- Modified on 7/18/2004 4:04:29 PM
They DO keep your information, much as they deny it. They might not ever USE it. But in my experience any info you give in the pursuit of this hobby can be used in the most unexpected ways imaginable. Which is why I advocate that anyone with a private life they want to keep private should provide as little info that might damage their non-hobby life as possible. A couple of anecdotes:
I ONLY visit with reputable ladies. On at least four occassions, ladies called me up, quite unexpectedly, in an effort to drum up some business for themselves -- MONTHS and MONTHS after I saw them, once or twice. Trouble is, I NEVER gave ANY of them my cell phone number. They took it upon themselves to capture it with Called ID. All of the aforementioned calls happened during business hours, so it was more annoying than anything else. But, another time, a lady called me to say she was changing cell numbers. She called me on a Saturday morning. While I was at the zoo. With my family. Luckily, that call didn't come at a time when my SO borrowed my phone for the day. (I use a separate cell # now for hobbying -- the best $24 a month I spend).
Proof positive that any and all info in this hobby can be used in the most unexpected ways, with unexpected consequences. As far as ladies not keeping any of your information...get real.
I have no problem with screening. The ladies know better than I do what it takes to ensure their safety. I give them whatever information they ask for.
Maybe there's a little risk there for me, but the risks you mention (LE/freaks, etc.) are way more serious.
My .02.
Age of Reason anymore but I didn't think it had gotten that far.
and I'm not sure there are any more per capita today than any other time in history. Even if statistics show there to be a greater incidence today, there is still the very likely possibility that simply more are investigated as such, and that previous ones went unreported. All in all, these are pretty good times we live in. We've got a few problems to solve, but so has every generation in the past. I'll take automobile exhaust over ankle-deep horse shit any day!
My buddy Fernando always know the best holiday gifts.
I do not understand the whole screening thing. I think you can never know a person until you have actually met them. Just because one girl says the guy is not okay doesn't mean him and I won't get along great.
I just read a book about the Green River Killer. Now that they caught him they know more about him. He said that he used to pick up girls and NOT kill them on purpose so they would tell their friends that he was a good guy. So then when he would pick her friend up she would think he was nice....and she would go with him with no worries but would never return. He did that a lot to get "good references" so he could use that to his advantage.
So, there is no way and no questions in the world that can let you know what someone's intentions really are. Just because his name matches the name he gave you for his work and matches the address he gave you and matches his business cards and so on.....what good is that if he was the Green River Killer?
I think screening gives girls a FALSE sence of security and might cause the girl to have her guard down when girls should be cautious every time.
The Green River Killer also said that girls used to always ask him if he was the Green River Killer. His answer?...
"Do I look like the Green River Killer?"
~Shayla
-- Modified on 7/19/2004 9:27:19 AM
-- Modified on 7/19/2004 9:29:40 AM
when your rigth your rigth
I'm sorry, but those are three words that really tick me off. What a complete asshole. (1) It ain't up to him who lives and dies; (2) There aren't enough gals in the world, let alone those worth spending cnjugal time with - DON'T diminish the supply; (3, and most importantly) Each of those ladies had friends, family and futures.
Fuck the GRK and the horse he rode in on. May he roast slowly in hell for all eternity.
(Go ahead, moderate me, I know my language is out of line - just can't bite my toungue on this subject).
Ladies, what is the one and only ID u need to be sure that the hobbysit seeking u is not LE?
A paystub?
Paystub sounds reasonable to me. If you dont want to give out info.
....mostly it's to give them some power for retribution if the guy stiffs them, shorts them, obsesses on them with annoying/unwanted phone calls/visits, or gets out of hand during the session. I've built relationships with several ladies where they are willing to talk about the business side of the business. In big cities, concern among Indies about LE is zilch. They agree with Turkana that serial killers don't lurk everywhere. They say you can't size up a wacko just because he has an unblocked home, business or cell phone, a drivers license or anything else. The fact a man can pony up $300-$400 is a bigger qualification they aren't a nut than any screening measure, I'm told. The only feasible way to gauge a new client, they say, is to sit him down for 5-10 minutes at the start of the session and have a look at him. So, as far as screening goes, my take on the matter is that it involves one or two issues: Hypersensitivity (paranoia?) by the lady about have a bad client experience, and/or retaining some option of control over the client while rendering a service that by its nature makes the ladies vunerable.
No doubt ladies have had instances of scary encounters with clients. Once stung, twice shy. And my guess is these happen more frequently at the downscale levels of the hobby.
If the lady does some screening, she is just being careful. If she is not careful at all,do youwant to see her?
Not me.
in the same place with the same question. We will probably see a similar question about screening on these boards every week until the summer of 2010.
There are many men (myself included) who would not entrust any commercial companion with their personal information. Paid ladies may rant all day long about their concerns about security and law enforcement, but it is to no avail. There are many men who may work sensitive jobs, don't trust the paid lady to throw away his personal information even though she says she will, or a multitude of other reasons why he doesn't feel comfortable with giving such information to a stanger. Ladies can try to conjole and pursuade the guy all they want, but they probably will not get any personal information from these guys.
There are also some ladies that will not see any guy without a way to verify who he says he is. If a guy wants to see this type of lady he must conform and be willing to follow her set procedures. Not doing so, will only frustrate the paid lady and she will not see you. So if you truly want to connect with a lady that screens, you will have to give up the personal information she requires.
This really should not even be a subject on these boards because there really is no room for discussion.The bottom line is that these two categories of individuals and viewpoints are really not compatible with one another. One is not going to convince the other to 'make an exception this one time only'.
A bit of helpful advice guys, there are many commercial companions who don't require any personal information, so if you call someone and she requests this personal info, just say you are not comfortable giving that out, thank you very much. Say good bye nicely. Don't be a pushy jerk, just move on to the next lady. Ladies, when guys don't want to give any personal info, there is no need to get upset and go into a lengthy explanation why you need this information. If you don't get it, say good bye nicely and hang up. End of story.
Round and round we go and I have no doubt we will end up here sometime very soon with another identical question regarding screening.
we just need to recognize we have two categories of people with differing comfort levels. When we encounter incompatibility, we can at least be civil to each other and move on to someone else.
I also agree with Joercny; if we fellows are uncomfortable handing out info, we shouldn't do so.
There are providers who don't ask for anything - good providers, too - not reckless nut cases. There are providers who don't require a phone number, or even a last name. If you're a decent person, but with "info sensitivities," find these providers, patronize them and treat 'em right.
I also agree with the wisdom of having time to size someone up. Initially that may take place during a phone conversation, but should continue with some chatting upon meeting. If uneasy, just call it off.
In the end, barring any red flags, there must be a certain level of trust both ways for things to continue and to continue well.
So, enjoy it!
I've always thought that personal/employment info really doesn't tell the lady who the client is except that he's not LE.... but it's something she MAY use to get back at him if he crosses her somehow.(real or imagined)
Now if the screening ladies really think the way joercny says they do, then it certainly gives us pause...
I just wonder if there's a better way out there to keep both sides safe and anxiety-free...