: Re:What I've learned : Discussion in TER General Board, posted by PaigeBennett

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Re:What I've learned

PaigeBennett 1683 reads

posted 21 years ago

Some very realistic advice. Thanks HF

Related Link: H.O.T.

MorganEllis21 years ago2895 reads

Article Help Needed - Client Tips & Advice

Hi all

I'm working on a series of articles for a new site devoted to supporting those who are new to sex work.

I'm looking for some feedback from hobbyists - preferably long term hobbyists - on what you feel you've learned over the years.

What do you think helps you get better service from the escorts you visit? What have you found is the best way to set up appointments? How do you avoid disappointment? How do you keep from being ripped off?

Don't feel you have to censor yourself - tell us the good stuff, and the bad. I won't remove anything other than your identifying characteristics, and any profanity

These tips are meant to help sex workers be better at their jobs, and to help clients get better service. Anything you want to share is welcome!

Please note that I can't get board mail at the moment, so please email your responses to me at [email protected], or you can feel free to post them in this thread.

I'll be asking the ladies for some similar assistance over the next little while...

Thanks in advance!

Morgan

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HandsFree21 years ago1887 reads

What I've learned

If a woman's heart ain't in it, she needs to find something else to do; this is not a game and you might piss off the wrong guy.

Be very easy to contact including hiring a phone person; too many ladies get popular and figure they don't need manners any more. Return calls and/or e-mail promptly.

Take the week off when your are OTR and find something meaningful to do with your life; never stop learning because looks and age are not always kind.

Perform to your best or if your heart and mind are not in it, cancel the appointment. Most guys in the hobby only want to get laid and they don't want to waste resources to have a "she just laid there" experience (see #1).

Be forever cheerful without being too chatty. Some guys would love to get inside your head, but for an hour or two that's not really possible unless all you know is sex and your bag of tricks is only as good as his erection.

Don't define yourself by this or any other role. Humans have a great capacity to think, learn, and become whatever they choose; it's when we think we are what we do, that is when we create a prison of sorts.

Women control half of the world's wealth and all of the pussy, but you'd never know it because many of you have this urge to define yourselves based on what a man tells you, you are...

Don't believe that you have to offer all of the crazy fetishes to compete with others or for the love of money. A person either rises or sinks to their circumstances. If you want to make top dollar in this business you have to transform yourself to fit the type of clientel you desire. Acting doesn't count; most men are only stupid when their dick is in your mouth. Try your best to leave this business with your health and you ass intact. Many don't.

Save and invest your money; control your addictions (shopping and spending are the top two). I know of 3 ladies that never charged more than $$$ and who walked away from the biz with their minds, bodies, and souls intact. Financially, if you save/invest more than you spend, you'll will have achieved what most of us never will. Starting out with say $12,000 and investing at as little as 2k a year for say 10 years (with modest returns) and can retire with dignity that provided you have the discipline to let it compound; money loves time.

Finally, this is a short-term biz or should be. Since you spend more time upright than in other positions, plan your exit strategy and work toward it every day. Learn 2 or 3 useful skills not related to the hobby. Life is already too short/fleeting... and you won't get out of this life alive.

-- Modified on 11/17/2005 11:30:44 PM

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PaigeBennett21 years ago1684 reads

Re:What I've learned

Some very realistic advice. Thanks HF

Related Link: H.O.T.

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saltyballs21 years ago1842 reads

Well put Handsfree........Short sweet and to the point.

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Bizzaro Superdude21 years ago2545 reads

Agreed - would add the following:

Be honest - with yourself first, and then with the client. If you are not up to the session - explain to him, before the session starts.

I also agree with the thought that you must like this profession to succeed - I have been with too many who when engaged in the sex, get a vacant look - as if they had left the party... when it, IMO, only started. Like people, chat, but be careful what you reveal. I know that I like getting to know a provider - but there are limits.... and I try not to step over them - although I must admit - I did once - and I have regretted it - not because of me, but because I think that I may have frightened the lady - and that was totally NOT my intention.

Learn to laugh with your clients - not at your clients. Some are a pretty sad lot - they come to you, some of them, because they have no place else to go, and if you redicule them, they will have no outlet - be aware that a certain percentage of your clientelle will fall in that categoy - and you will not know which of them fall into it.

Be honest about your appearance - Men are very funny - about what rings their chimes.... some like young and thin - some like old and fat, some like blond - for some only a black lady will do.... Never Ever be offended by someone not seeing you - It is all about physical chemistry - (ain't it wonderful - that a subject despised by all Chem majors would have such an impact!).... If the PChem is not there - not much excitement will follow.... So be truthful in your ads.... and please provide a full length body shot -

Exercise your body -- not just in bed but out... and more importantly Exercise your mind.... If you have a degree - do some consulting - If you don't have a degree enroll in some low level program to obtain a degree.... Most of the providers that I like either have or are obtaining a degree - and can discuss a wide range of topics.... really cool - that way we do not have to discuss other clients or other providers - we can talk about what they are about - or what I am about.

Decide up front - what services you will offer - that does not mean that for a subset of your clientelle you will only do those - but you be in control about what you will and will not do. No one likes a long list of rules - but having them - assures you that you are in control

Give the full hour - if it means MSOG then that is what it means - but I find it really upsetting to pop, and then be shown the door - really bad form - and essentially assures that there will not be a second engagement - you are renting time.

I have been told - that to assure reasonable recovery between clients - you should count on 30 min.... that is if you have a client at 7 PM - the next can be scheduled (assuming 1 hr. appts) at 8:30) and you should wash.

Do not wear heavy perfume - and limited or light lipstick.

Take a course in public health - establish a good relationship with an OB/GYN specialist.

Be independant - so you do not share your take (up to 50%) and you have more flexibility. Learn as much about computer technology as you can - it is a good fall back in any event. Learn about photography.... to use in your ads...

If you fall in love - define before you fall - your expectations of the relationship and how you will "qualify the boyfriend" - Remember this is a very intimate business - that you will meet and fall for someone you meet is a likely scenario.... at least think about it.

Recognize the impact of what you do on other aspects of your life. They can be significant.

Finally, make friends in this hobby, other providers, civies, and yes - the clients - but do not "give services" for friendship. I do have provider friends - and I do not expect them to offer to me for free what others get at a premium price....

There are lots of things to consider and think about other than the mechanics of this profession. Any woman entering it will change the way in which she views sex and male - female relations forever.... but I think for the better.... but what do I know, I am green.

-- Modified on 11/18/2005 9:00:44 AM