Recently I heard of a provider being verbally threatened by another provider. I have seen in the past instances where it was claimed that a provider threatened a hobbiest with "exposure" (pardon the pun). I have also seen it claimed that a hobbiest, has threatened a provider with "exposure." Questions to all, hobbiest and provider alike....
1) have you ever felt threatened
2) have you ever been threatened...
3) if you have, what did you "do" that caused the other person to "Strike out at you"
4) if you have, what did you do in response to the threat...
5) was the threat followed-up - that is, were you exposed? was there something of a consequence?
To the "legal staff" I would pose the following, what can a provider and separately what can a hobbiest do it they are threatened by the opposite...?
Why do I want to know? quite frankly - I am wondering how prevelant this sort of behavior is... while providers have never done this to me.... I have on occasion heard of "stuff" happening - both ways (actually ALL of the ladies that I have met have been what I would call civil, maybe not my cup of tea, but civil)...
More importantly, if it does happen, how can one protect oneself? If one can?
What I have found is we have smart people on this board, for the most part, and I would love to hear their take on this "Delicate" issue.
1) have you ever felt threatened YES!
2) have you ever been threatened... YES!
3) if you have, what did you "do" that caused the other person to "Strike out at you" YES!
4) if you have, what did you do in response to the threat... I told everyone everything, people know I don't lie
5) was the threat followed-up - that is, were you exposed?
Yes! they called children and famlies on me and told them I am a prositute on the net, They posted my son's school info on the net.(There are 14 pedifiles in my neighborhood) they also told all the moms at my son's school. These moms were showing up with bats, to hurt Me! An envelope full of all my site info and pictures (off my site) were sent, to my landlord, and my ex-husband. They posted pic's of me all over my hood.
I have always lived an honest and good life, when all these Drama queens started their mess, it was my Clients that kept the faith and got me thru it. Thanks to them I kept on keepin' on!!! I love the hobby, these bitches are trying to ruin it for everyone!!!!!!!!!!!!
Glad you made it thru that mess, Ashley. You seem like a super person in addition to being very good looking. And I do enjoy your posts. But I am a Tampa Bay Bucs fan, and although it was years ago, I wish we had kept Steve Young. Do you ever tour to Tampa? I would love to see you there. Keep on keepin' on!
Who did all this shit to you? And why?
I met a provider, first at an MP. She seemed nice and fairly stable, a nursing student, no less. So I upped the ante and we started meeting off campus, so to speak.
All was well for about a year, then she started to go a bit psycho on me. Always brought baggage into the bedroom.
It kept getting worse and worse until finally, she started going into a long rant about how I should leave my wife because she's a bitch (I had never even said a word about my wife and ironically she had become even bitchier than her.)
Well I said that is for her and didn't call her again. She called me and left a message on my phone saying when are we getting together again. I called her back and said if we are going to meet, we need to have a long sit down talk first. Then nothing for over a year.
Suddenly she started called me again leaving messages. I just ignored them. Then the threats started: I'm going to go see your wife, I'm coming over to your office, etc.
I just kept ignoring them and she never did squat.
I guess I was just lucky.
Ashley, I don't know how you came out of that situation. Did you have to move?
I had my son moved to another school, and I screen a lot better, now.
I lowered my rates and just kept up what was pissing them off so bad.
I have pissed off a very controlling drama queen who is a gold paw on the dog, That is what set all this off. She has threatened to black list people who won't do as she say's, And has used these threats to keep clients from posting reviews on me. All to keep the gold paw away from its rightful owner, me!!!!
Lets face it, If your a hot provider, every-one's after you, and I mean that literally.
I would guess it would be pretty stupid to "out" anyone. The provider could lose thier income or even worse thier freedom and the hobbyist could lose thier job or family. so lets all just be respectful and adult about this and play nice!
mutually self preservation mode.... It does not take into account the random Brownian activities of the odd encounter.
I started this exercise to gauge just how delicate the equation is when encountering another person for the purposes of the hobby (provider or hobbiest). The frequency and risk is for all to assess. What I like about Ashley's post, is that there were those that surrounded her with support. So sad, that there are those who would feel that innocents are fair game.
Another way of controlling this would be to back-channel and blacklist. The main trouble with blacklisting is that again people may lie and start rumors to put somebody on the blacklist.
At least as far as providers are concerned, it will effect their bottom line so it might be a discouragement.
Then again if information is sent anonymously, how can you even blacklist? Supposed on incomplete evidence, people are mistaken?
I've read here that in some cities (Atlanta) this is a real problem. It's jealousy combined with the bottom line.
Outing is cruel, and it should be far more unusual.
I haven't personally been involved or heard from any providers that have been troubled.
I do know that Atlanta had some trouble in previous years but I had understood much of that had stopped.
(*I'm sorry for anyone that was involved and especially when I read things like what was posted above*)
What a sad state these people who perpetrate this must be in..... kisses ~T
Yes, it's pretty sad. 
Of course she left at least two years ago, but considering the post she was answering, it seems it's still going on.
Afterthought: I see now that you answered that very thread.
I will admit that it was my sole source.
It has gotten to me before that other cities had flare ups of this kind of dirty work. In my home town, there was a guy threatening to out ladies, putting up rewards for their personal information. It stopped when they learned who he was and that he had a wife. There was some thoughts of legal action. Believe it or not, the woman who got the information was saintly and decided not to use it, and he's been quiet ever since.
It's not solely providers who do this.
-- Modified on 9/22/2006 10:07:50 PM
-- Modified on 9/22/2006 10:11:13 PM
1) have you ever felt threatened...YES
2) have you ever been threatened...YES
3) if you have, what did you "do" that caused the other person to "Strike out at you"...NOT SURE
4) if you have, what did you do in response to the threat...I had a client trace the emails back to her and exposed her. In the end I was made out to be the bad guy for defending myself. This same lady has harassed at least 4 other ladies I know (from another board)to the point the good providers leave that site.
5) was the threat followed-up - that is, were you exposed? was there something of a consequence? She seen I was not scared and she was really just all talk but I still get annoying emails and calls evey now and then.
She pretends to be a guy and writes bad stuff about me, she thought I had kids and threatedned to call DCFS but I have 2 dogs not kids...lol and my family pretty much has an idea what I do we just dont discuss it, so she cant hurt me there either. She has gone as far as reporting me and few other ladies to LE but I am not doing anything illegal...Just a horny little freak..lol
***My advice is to be aware of who you are dating and make sure she has reviews. With me I assure complete discretion and have been providing for 4 years so I am a reputable provider.G
o for the ladies that have built a reputaion
I am a bachelor's best friend, and a married man's best kept secret.
I wrote a mediocre (yet 100% truthful) review of a girl (on different site, different handle). A few days later, the booking agent for the girl left me a long, nasty tirade on my cell phone voice mail (so long, that it timed out on him and he had to leave 3 separate voice mails).
He said how a bad review takes money out of the girls pocket, I don't know who I'm messing with, the girl has clients and friends that are powerful and influential people that can hurt me and turn my life upside down, etc.. He went on to call me every insult in the book, how I'm just a "john" and should be lucky that such a hot lady will see me, etc..
Nothing ever became of it, thank god, but at the time I did have shivers up my spine because you just never know what a lunatic like that might be able to do.
What I found interesting was that he figured out that it was me somehow through my IP address from the review site. He mentioned my ISP name, which was a fairly unique/corporate name and easy to figure out which client probably wrote the review. I know mod's on review sites can trace an IP address, but to this day am still unsure how he was able to do it himself.
One funny part transpired out of it though. The numb nuts called from his home land line and it took me all of two minutes to look up his real name, address, etc.. I was sooo tempted to leave a message on his answering machine where his wife and kids could here it, but figured I'd shouldn't push my luck 
I gave his info to a buddy of mine and said, if I go missing or something happens to me, this guy probably did it.
-- Modified on 9/23/2006 9:30:53 AM
A client ratted her out. When the cops came to see her, her kids were in the house, and to make a long story readable, child services got involved. She was threatened with losing her kids and hung up her split-crotch panties.
This happens all the time.
My personal story is that it cost somewhere in the neighborhood of 65 to 80K to clear the damage that was intended towards me through vicious acts directed at me personally through others in the hobby.
I have since changed my name and gone more UTR…. I adjusted my life and made decisions to protect people who were associated with me. (*I could see where an act similar to the one perpetrated upon me could have shattered the lives of many people*)
As have already stated…. I appreciate you posting the thread and your thoughts. My incident happened in the recent past but I felt at the time it was an isolated attack just towards myself and now (*because of the suggestion contained within this thread*) I have learned many have been targeted much the same way I was.
Thank you again to everyone who has shared their thoughts and personal experience. It was eye opening. Kisses ~T
I received a threatening email saying all clients and friends of a certain provider were going to be outed to their wives. It said a certain guy was made an example, gave his address and phone number and told us to call him to verify what was done to him.
I'm single, BTW. It might have been a paper threat, but this is just a small sample of the dirty work done against this woman. It was ceaseless over a period of months, and was apparently more than person doing it. These people actually used a similar email address to hers and ran false specials with ridiculasly low prices arranged appointments sending the clients right to her home. It's probably still going on.
Don't even get me started about agencies.
I wish this hobby were just completely fun, but we're reminded it's a business that's unregulated, where competition could be utterly cut-throat and insanely intense. It brings shame to it. There must be a way to self-regulate it. I can't think of it now. Blacklists can be used as weapons, too.
In some cases, it might fit the legal definition of harassment or even extortion. In that case, you could bring LE in for felony investigation. Of course, that's very dangerous.
One thing that could be done is: get this hobby decriminalized. That way, people could bring LE in to investigate without fear of being implicated themselves.
Another thing that could be done: hire a private eye. Better yet, there might be an industry here that serves only providers and clients exposing the people who are pulling dirty tricks, and who publish the evidence on a website. That way, at least there's independent certification.
-- Modified on 9/23/2006 10:20:11 AM
This is a far more serious problem than I suspected. I am surprised that no one from the legal profession stepped forward with some general suggestions.... too bad that!
As we saw, many leave the hobby out of fear, rather than face their accuser. In my way of thinking those that cause the fear are a far greated threat to us than either a hobbiest or provider.... So, lets be careful out there....
