We're the guys with the sweat on our brow, scurrying out of a faceless apartment building at 1am.

Re:Identifying Brother Hobbyists

I like the one the Thugs had in the 80's movie "The Deceivers" with Pierce Brosnan.  They would make a motion to the face and throat saying, "greetings, Ali my brother."

I think it's the same one used now in Al Qaeda...  

I like the index finger slide down the side of the nose from the movie "The Sting".  Sedagive.

We're all hobbyists. The guy who goes to Thailand once in his life, pays for sex, feels like the woman is his girlfriend, and then leaves, never hobbying again, has the same motivations as the guy who would go to Nevada brothels every night if he could afford it, but because he always plays craps in Vegas he loses his hobbying money first. If he ever hits a big one, he promises himself he'll go to Thailand ...

Men who go to Brazil for the women, might actually have a moral compunction AGAINST hobbying in the USA, perhaps because they think it should only be done where "society approves of it" more, or something. So, the question begs a different question or two:

Who ARE NOT the hobbyists? Do they have a hand-sign?
Which former-hobbyists are CURRENT-hobbyists?
More germane, which ones of them WANT to be identified?

Etc. etc.

Personally, I try to keep myself of the frame of mind, that hobbying is NOT some strange bizarre secret cult affair, but rather is mainstream and normal. I try to remind myself that we're all passing among different phases of "paying for it" and that many women, as well as men, live with those sorts of trade-offs in their lives. By looking for the "secret hobbyists" who are out there, we're taking a different frame of mind, the frame that suggests that we are few, far-between, furtive, secretive, desperate, all that. I don't like that frame.

I do get your point about a hand-sign, though. If you ever see me in public, I'll be the guy with his hands on some chick's tits. If not, she'll be begging me to put my hands back on her tits.