and what was it about him that attracted you? I know providers are professionals and can generally be emotionally detached from the physical intimacy, but in the end they are still human with all the same feelings and frailties. Do they not?
Yes I have and it was exactly the same sort of things that attracted me as would attract me to a guy who wasn't a client (intelligent, great sense of humour, similar views/interests, physically attractive).
You cannot fall in love with someone you don't really know. Lust and love are very different things. Like and love are also different. You can negate thoughts of stuff like that when you ask yourself if you know the person well enough.
There are those things of the gods like chemistry, the depth of connection and unparalleled attraction but in reality, it takes a lot more than that to even embark upon a loving relationship. Both people must be in the same place in their lives.
You literally have to be around someone an awful lot and practically living with them for years to know if you are truly in love. Chemistry is a knome dancing a jig. But is there anything behind him when the dance is done?
Dear Heather, I humbly disagree with you! In 1988, I was flying from New York to San Diego, as I sat on my seat, here comes a flight attendent, looking like Kim Novak in Vertigo! I immediately fell in love with her! Later, in the elevator at the airport, we met again, and just like Ralph Kramden, I went huba huba huba!
Never saw her again, but every time I fly that airlines, I pray to see her again!
There you have it! Us men are so shallow, we fall in love immediately, and truly with our eyes!
Uh, pardon me, but that's infatuation. I'm sure you've met some women who looked the ideal, but when the conversation began, you realized they were the devil incarnate, pea brain, etc. You aren't in love with the flight attendant. You are in love with the "service concept fantasy with isolated airport motif". Rescue her from a life of tray dinners, size 8 weigh in's and annoying coke addicted pilots, yada yada. For the record, Kim Novak's home was destoyed twice by mudslids. (I'm telling you there is a rescue fantasy here.) She is now 70 years old and caring for llamas.
There's a percentage of us who's absolutely gorgeous, travel the world, come in contact with more businessmen than we possibly can stand, get inundated with business cards, constant invitations not to mention lying on a beach in Florida at the Company's expense.
"There's a percentage of us who's absolutely gorgeous..."
So we are to infer that atleast one amongst us is a gorgeous Flight Attendant. That doesn't have to mean they are a provider but how many people would participate here that are neither a provider, hobbyist or are retired from one of those two groups?
Now the question every man reading this wants to know: How the hell do I find out if my hot stewardess has a second profession??
to make such a blanketing global statement of opinion as though it were a proven and substantiated fact. As a matter of fact "LOVE" being such an individually defined variant is difficult at best for one to define to a personal level of truth and comprehension, no less experience it based on their own definition, at any one time, that any type of global or finite statement of absolute fact could not possibly be the "only truth". As a variant changes, kind of like the mood swings of a bipolar provider for example, so does the personal definition of that variant. Add in some heart break, insultive and abusive experiences, and that variant definition has now changed dramatically. So what one may define "Love" at at any given moment may or may not allow that one in their own belief and truth of making and allowing a "Love" at first sight to occur or not. Only an Omniscient Power higher than any I can honestly say I have ever met, could possibly even begin to understand enough of all the diverse factors affecting each and all's defining input makeing each definition of "love" so vastly different, yet so similar, and yet none wrong or right. BUT this is all just my opnion, and what do I know? Not enough to ASS U ME my opinion to be factual for all. But enough to know what's not fact, but in fact an opinion.
There are many types of love (love for a lover, love for a family member, love for a child, love of life, love of a god, etc.) Why do so many feel that there is only ONE type of TRUE love in a relationship structure? Yes, that may be truth for some; but it is also a generalization which has caused a great deal of harm in our society, and to individuals who haven't searched their OWN hearts for their personal truth. What if love comes into your life in a form you can't recognize because you're *sure* that is not what it looks or feels like? We grow up with the ideal of the nuclear family, the prince for the princess, the search for that one "true" love.
If we give up the ideal we've been taught, and keep our hearts open, we can find many loves of many levels from many sources ((and please don't think I'm just speaking of lovers in the bedroom here... although my thoughts on monogamy vs. fidelity often get wrapped up in this topic))
I could go on and on... but I'll throw the bi-poly woman back in the closet for now.
There IS love at first sight. For anyone who has experienced it, your beliefs will never change their mind. I'm convinced this is an energetic pairing that fits just right, some believe it has to do with reincarnation and past lives, some just say it is what it is. Love at first sight happens when at that first sight, the first glimpse in those eyes, you somehow KNOW a person much deeper and truer than what you will ever find out about them by what actions they have taken in their lives and what comes out of their mouths. When you meet someone and you feel a connection with, and love for that soul.
Yes, many people confuse lust for this state. But yes, it happens.
"but in reality, it takes a lot more than that to even embark upon a loving relationship." You're short-circuiting life with thoughts like this. It takes nothing but a pure heart to embark upon a loving relationship.
"have to be around someone an awful lot and practically living with them for years to know if you are truly in love" I again will have to disagree. Love and long-term compatibility are two different concepts. Love is no less true if a pair does not grow old together. Sometimes a particular love is a learning, growing, and/or healing path for us, not a destination.
Just my .02... sorry for the rambling. Unable to sleep toninght, and you hit on one of my personal sermons...
in my humble opinion... and I applaud those willing to extend their opinions in a 'food for thought' or in some cases 'food to be regurtitated and purged again' conversation, such as this one. I may not agree with all opinions, but thank G-d in this wonderful country of ours, we can express those opinions, and we all have the right to express may they be right or wrong, I shall always support and fight for your right to express them! Then again we also always have the right to be wrong as well. But that is just my humble opinion, and what do I know?
Maybe it's the romanticist in me, but I totally agree. Love cannot be described in such a simplistic definition as Heather's. I'm still in love with a woman that I haven't seen for many years. I didn't have to live with her for x # of years to know this. It wasn't love at first sight, but more of a soulmate type of love. Something I knew, and she knew from the beginning. Unfortuntely we both had other lives and responsibilities. I will be in love her until I'm in my grave.
Building such a triangle in a relationship can be immediate or take decades. There is nothing prohibiting either path.
When one corner of the triangle is in crisis or trauma, for instance a serious illness prevents eros from being active, the other two may bolster the love relationship, and provide endurance.
Fraternity and Agape are extremely difficult to attain with a client since most if not all providers require all the time that is spent with them to be "on the clock." If a provider finds one client they aren't on the clock with they may find themselves feeling like they are doing a disservice to other regulars.
It really is walking a tight rope when we live a double life.
Yes, at least once a week! There are so many really great men who participate in this hobby, how could I not? The same things that attract me in every aspect of my life are the same qualities I find in many, if not most of my clients/friends. They are genuine, kind, funny, sensitive, open, honest, giving, communicative, physically attractive, and great lovers.
Maybe I am just spoiled, or extraordinarily lucky, but I am constantly amazed by the men who I truly have the pleasure of getting to know.
I believe BluesClue was just asking if any of you providers have fallen for a client (whehter it's infatuation, love, or simply a real burning in your loins, whatever), what made you fall for him, and the outcome..... He wasn't asking about the philosophy of love or a deconstruction of love, which is kind of getting off track. The brother just wants to know whehter a client's been so good, that you just fell for him. Carrie of London had an interesting answer...I wonder what ever came of the relationship with the client.
I don't know if you'd call it love but I would certainly say I had very strong feelings for someone once. No, it didn't work out. Though unmarried, he was in a relationship.
Have fallen for a fellow Brit.....still I have my feet planted firmly on the ground and still keep it as business as much as possible. He does get a great rate though!!!!!!!
sorry, to go temporarily off the subject but the women I've met lately who are British have been all incredibly hot...so it's given me that impression of them.
Back to the topic: Anyway, question for the lovely lady providers (Heather, Carrie, British babe, etc)...so how did it end? How come it didn't work out?
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