How many of you thought FFng was one thing, only to have someone tell you/show you that it was something else?

There's mention of it on the SD board, and it reminded me of my question to you all.
How many thought of it as 'violent', and disgustingly unappealing? Then perhaps saw it differently when told/shown?

For the ladies, how many of you later realized that it's a great/er, fast/er orgasm?

Sedona.  Do you mind giving a physical description of the activity that you mentioned?  For some reason I cannot get a visual.

I seen what it looks like and it makes me wanna hurrrrrrrlllllll lol In this case to each their own on this one.

I had one of my lady friends in Vegas who told me it's just awesome.

Really Not a big fan of it. On the point of disgusting...

I guess she (her puddy cat) never ran up against Mike Tyson.

Fist Fucking is much like Anal. Until you meet an enthusiast, it seems bizarre and freaky. Once you have been introduced, shown the correct, safe and sanitary way of doing it, your opinion can change.

Fisting is not as well known as anal and probably not as well accepted. However since it is appearing more all the time, its acceptance is growing slowly. Many ladies really enjoy the way it makes them feel completely full. Of course others just flinch and run aways in horror Like any other sexual practice, a willing and enthusiastic partner is the best introduction.

By the way, from the few ladies I have experienced fisting with, many squirt when they orgasm from fisting, most of them for the first time.

Well, when most people think of fists, they think violence, ie, fist fights, a balled up fist usual signifies anger, so there's all this negativity associated with it right from the start.

Then, you might see porn clips where he IS jammin' a fist in her, in any way other than sensual, or pleasant.

But, what was told to me was one finger, slowly, at a time, until he says, 'guess what? how many fingers do you think are in? Well, I have the whole hand, up to my wrist'. Then, he moves his hand, actually arm, in the same slow rhythm he would otherwise, and the feeling is incredible - very 'full' and the orgasm much more intense.

I can see this being very advantageous for both the men, and the ladies. It just got the wrong 'marketing', I'm thinking..

Great book... get it... read it!

Yes, this is not a violent and perverse sexual act, but it does have it's own risks which go with the rewards.  While this is intense and mind-blowing, it is NOT for everyone.

PLEASE research before just trying, use gloves (even a manicure is often just not going to cut it for such delicate areas), and only try this with someone you can communicate well with and trust... as with any sexual activity, make the journey the focus and not the destination.

Also, for the ff-er, DO NOT try to remove your hand if you feel that the contractions are too strong.  The muscles ARE strong enough to cause damage to YOU.

I would agree that fisting has gotten the wrong marketing. Thanks, Sedona (and to MichaelCA) for putting the act in a different perspective. Now, to find a willing partner.

My introductin to fisting was watching two madly in love women at a party.  The fistee was actually up on a kitchen island and there were several people standing around watching.  I assisted by working a small vibrator on her clit.  The look on both of their faces was just amazing and the noises she made as she came made me a convert (at least conceptually).  I've been a receiver and a giver of this intensly intimate act and luckily my experiences lead me to liking it.  To me it is something I reserve for special occasions and special people.

I think most any sexual act can be a positive experience as long as you've been introduced to it in a good way.

Not a fan. You either dig it, or not. It is nothing like anal, or anything else. I pride myself on being tight, and I felt too loose for about a week afterwards. I guess if you have had kids its no big deal, but I haven't and I don't want to lose my Kung Fu grip! I would reccommend gloves and heavier viscosity for lube, like anal play lubricants. (Wet, Platinum Grade)

I've been introduced to this delightful little activity by three women.  Each one showed me the proper way to do it. Curiously, it was the exact same technique each time.  And, yes, it seems to be an out of this world feeling for the woman. Pretty damn cool for the man as well.  Watching pleasure is a beautiful thing.

Jacksonlips

I know that I'm responding under and alias.  There seems to be some rather harsh comments here and, perhaps this seems too selfish, I don't want to be associated with my comments here when I book with a lady.  Having said that...

I think that fisting is kinky.  I think that it gives me visual pleasure and that idea of going where things are pushed to the edge.  But I know that it is not for everyone and I would never push the issue with a provider.  I am not into giving or receiving pain unless guided (and convinced) by my partner that she wants that.

I think that I have produced the most intense orgasms I have ever witnessed when I've fisted in conjunction with DATY. I have also been told by some receivers of the fisting that they had never experiences anything like that in an orgasm before.  Sure, they could have just said that for my edification, but witnessing the effect first hand (no pun intended) I seriously doubt it.  More than one has felt too drained to do anything but rest for quite awhile afterward and one lady just asked me to hold her while she continued to have little body spasms for what seemed like another 2 or 3 minutes afterward.

I assume that there is a little pain involved but I've been told it's the kind of pain that goes, for some, along with sex.  That is, those who like nipple pulling and such seem to enjoy a certain pain venture into their sex play.  Myself, I don't, and am real hesitant to administer pain.  So I am assuming that for those I've fisted, the pain was totally within the pleasure zone.

I always begin with pleanty of foreplay ahead of the fisting so that she is very excited.  It's not the first move to make after a hug.  And there has to be lots of lub. Then the entry must be done slowly and gently with very gradual increasing numbers of finger insertions.  Pusing gently while lots of clit stimulation is done seems to work.  And importantly I stop when she indicates.  I don't like a lot of talk while doing forplay, but I believe it never is wrong to let the lady know that you need to know when enough is enough.  I have felt that some were just a little reluctant to stop me because they were trying to be good providers.  I have tried to take every hint that there is too much discomfort.  I usually back off and try giving more time for the arrousal to increase then try again.  But I never force the issue.

I have found it to be an extremely satisfying thing to experience the ladies orgasm and the reaction afterward and know that I provided that for them.  To me that is such a rush.  

One more thing.  I don't believe that the ladies that I have fisted felt any looser during conventional sex than others.  I think that the body addapts.  I think that I should also mention that I don't have real big hands either.

-- Modified on 3/28/2004 7:21:16 PM

I only experienced this one time and it was with a lady that was 21 and still very tight.  

It happened as you decribed in that I was dining and slipped one finger in..then two..then three...and before I knew it I had my whole fist up there.

I would never have done it if she was not going crazy the whole time.  As it turned out, we were in an incall spa place and she had just started.  She was so worried about the huge cum stain we had just made on the spa's bed.  

I never had tried that before and don't look for it but it was one of the most memorable sexual experiences of my life.  I am pretty sure it made a diffence for her as I was not from her town but she was willing to fly to see me.

As I read your post and others I kept looking at my hands and kept wondering how in the hell I could get such meathooks into a woman's vagina.  Unfortunately, I do not have small hands, exactly the opposite, they are very large.  Maybe I can work in a few fingers, maybe three then ball them up and move them around.  I agree that wearing latex glooves is the way to go when doing something like fisting.

Hey, GREAT movie, Dickie (eom)

-- Modified on 3/28/2004 7:52:11 PM

-- Modified on 3/28/2004 7:54:35 PM

"put up your dukes"

Now I know why Maureen O'hara looked at John Wayne that way after he said that....

chalk up another in the what I learned on TER Today category.

Cheers!

Sounds to me as though TER needs to add another field to the description form.   BTW, I think just about anything two ladies do with each other sexually is beautiful so count me in for the next party where those two will be in attendance.

And where can I find 2 women in LA who can duplicate the show LilyJune describes?

you drive to San Diego for them!

Anything anal is not something I would have reconsidered before this post. I have to say, I can't understand how it would work to create orgasm. Not that it can't do this just because I can't understand it. Visually it looks ugly to me. Also, it has always looked to me to be a "one way street" if even that, but given that human sexuality is such a difficult subject for disciplined study anyway...  

Wrong marketing not withstanding, since all sex has the wrong marketing in this culture it seems to me.  

/Zin

OMG..... Sedona you need to come here, because No local provider I have asked will even entertain that idea...............please please please..........

Its something I have wanted to do for 20 years and never met a woman would would and could.  One who would couldn't (very small pelvis, and no kids). Someone Email me backchannel if they know someone in DC area who is willing to entertain this with me, but wants to keep it lowkey..

(And, also in response to Mike1010's post..)

I am very tiny/tight 'down there' myself. Altho I've had two children, I had them c-section, so I've never given birth vaginally. REGARDLESS, whether a woman has had children, has never had children, has had them c-section, is 21 years old, or 50, your body still tightens up and 'goes back' even after being 'stretched'.

I thought this would be a good topic to discuss because there are too many misconceptions, or preconceptions about this, and most of it is due to the wrong 'publicity' or marketing.

And, as for the gentleman wanting to know if this is on my 'menu', there are many things on most every ladies' menus that you just need to discover. Once again, as I've said before, the RIGHT GFE will deliver the PSE for you, and so, along with that statement, when you nurture your relationship with your Provider, you will explore many things together.

Without time and patience, I would guess many things have to remain off the table. An hour just doesn't seem long enough. I don't want to speak for you, but I would guess that is why you like longer than an hour sessons.

I could think of about a thousand things I would like to try, but I would need about a week straight of your time to explore.

I still havent found my outer limit for tounge exhaustion.

I do see your point. Problem is my resources are not as extensive and may of the hobbiests on this board. I have inquired to a few and every one locally has said no way. The couple I know have hangups, and that is amoung one of them. Now I am not the pushy or heavy handed type so that should not be the issue, nor is respect. Every woman I have ever been with have had my utmost respect and attention. I know the does and don'ts. If just finding the right person who may be open to entertain this. And I do know some have to entertain the thought and I would keep it completetly between the two of us if it ever happened. In the interest that they may not want it public knowledge.

I have what I range from freindly to extremely close relationships with only a couple of providers.

As far as tightening up and stuff, I agree,  the "if I do this I will be loose forver" does not apply as Gymnists would be the flabbyest people around and contortionists horribly disfigured.  A toned mussle is more flexible as stronger than an untoned one.

But still pregnancy does change the Pelvic bone permanently and A woman who has had kids C section or not will have a larger pelvic opening than she had before.  And with some women that is a limiting factor. Still if any providers read this are local to me contact me back channel, it will remain private between us, and hell, you might become a favorite and be an excluse for me.  

Just a fantasy I have entertained for many years. I hope to be able to experience at least once.

-- Modified on 3/29/2004 10:01:27 AM

Never been ff/d, but when I started out as an escort I couldn't take some of the longer thicker guys.  Practice, practice practice, and guess what?  Now I can handle EVERY long thick one that cums my way!!  Some of the little ones I can't feel at all!!

ready willing and very able for all sorts of this kind of stuff.  Does this mean the Netmichelle is realy a mainstream gal after all?  Cum on gal, show us your kink, say it aint so!

You know we live for this stuff from you.

You remember that movie "Stepford Wives?" That would be me, "Stepford Provider" emotionless, orgasmless, and a saggy vagge. Faking orgasms, with a saccharine glossy smile. Besides, I'd need clothespins, so that my labia wouldn't flap in the breeze. (Lord, that was so funny, I almost dropped my webphone in the tub.) Nah, eat your heart out. Its not for me. I like to feel fucking fantastic when I'm fucking 24/7, just as every bit kinky as I crave to be. Peace.

As has been said already in this thread, fisting has the same marketing problem that greek often suffers from.  Many people's only exposure to fisting or greek comes from porn videos, which don't typically reflect those activities with a romantic spin.

Two other activities that I think suffer similar fates are strap-on play and russian.

Almost every reference I see made to strap-ons is in the context of the guy being at least a little submissive.  Yet almost every gal I know that owns said equipment is an incredibly soft, gentle GFE provider that likes to use the gear that same way.

Likewise, russian may conjure up a kind of "exploit my boobs" powerplay that can be fun to play with, but much more often than not, it's not like that at all.

All four of these activities are COMPLETELY different experiences depending on how they fit into the atmosphere of a specific meeting and the interplay of the participant's personalities.

I think you've got it right, OmegaZap, most people reject these activities without trying them first.  They do so because the idea, not the experience itself, turns them off and that happens because of the way they were initially exposed to the concept, as well as the subsequent associations they make as a result.

It's one of the reason most people end up having "meat and potatoes" sex rather than sampling from the entire smorgasboard of different experiences.  

I dated a girl whose best GF loved anal, in fact, she could only orgasm that way.  So every time she had sex, she always wanted to finish with anal.  Despite the many positive stories her friend told her, my GF would never even try it because she first saw it in an exploitative context on a porn flick.  

Similarly, a lot of guys think prostate massage, sometimes called male G-spot, is totally gay, even though it's been a technique for heterosexual arousal (a lot of women also enjoy anal stimulation) since the Kama Sutra was written, if not long before.

BDSM is probably another good example.  A lot of what makes sex exciting is the primal nature of it and the fact that there is always a degree of dominance and submission between partners.  And it's also a fact that a lot of women especially, get turned-on by light S & M type stimulation.  

But the imagery of BDSM that most of us see are the extreme images of torture, whipping or humiliation.  Well, there's a pretty big range on the total spectrum of activities before you get to that level.  But that is what has formed the image in the public's mind, so you best not bring the subject up to your date unless you know what her reaction will be beforehand.

I'd be willing to bet that even amongst the members on this board, most people have suprisingly conventional sexual experiences.

"It's usually the idea, rather than the reality that turns people off w/o trying."

This is exactly how most women respond to the thought of sex with me my whole life.

;^)

You start off with alot of oral........and a finger.... work your way to 2 or maybe even 3 fingers then you will definately need some lube.
It is not something I will do with just anyone their has to be a lot of trust and patience. After you get all fingers in you begin to push ( slowly ) you do not push in
& out it is continuous and slowly it is reallyl erotic and it is the only way I can SQUIRT!!!!! amazing


kisses & licks...........
mara of san diego

Yes, I know people say you have to learn 'how', and get used to it, etc., but the two times I did with my ex-husband, it was so painful I almost blacked out! I honestly thought he ruptured an intestine, and had abdominal pain for a week.
But, at least I tried it.

I honestly don't know how women can not only tolerate it (the pain), but actually enjoy it, and even have an orgasm! But, I guess I have to believe it. To me, it is so unpleasant, and feels like I'm going to empty my bowels all over him - how fun and sexy is that? Unless you're into scat!

Russian - piece of cake. Strap-on? Easy. The clients that request strap on action aren't the least bit into whether it's a power thing, submissive, 'gay' or whatever. They just know it feels good.

I wrote a long post on this subject a few years ago under a differnt alias.  I'll just give you the short version- It takes WAY longer to relax the sphincter muscle to prepare/enjoy for anal penetration than most people are willing to do.

You could easily spend 20-30  minutes or more, focused solely on slowly getting the muscle to comfortably accomodate a dildo or penis.  But few people take that much time even though that's what it takes for a beginner (or most other people) to prepare.

Guys with an erection in their hand aren't going to mess around with a half hour of coaxing. Invariably, someone is going to get impatient and try to enter his partner before she's ready.  That's why I always do it after my first orgasm, and start the foreplay/preparation while I'm soft and not in a hurry.  

Most of us are pretty damn tight down their, and it doesn't matter what type of stimulation you're getting, you've got to take it easy.  But few people who try anal make the effort.  They want to transition from vaginal sex to anal with just a little lube and a couple minutes of finger play.   Unless your partner is very experienced already, that's just a sure way to make sure she never does it with you a second time!

Don't know what's been wrong with this thing lately!  I actually typed a very profound, intelligent post...I can't remember what it was right now... Thank you CC for pointing out to me that this thing is on the fritz again.

Seriously, now, thanks Conjugal Coddger for correcting that picture, which is oh, so different now. That is a lot less ugly there!  And that is more in character for SedonaSanDiego.

Good thing I didn't try experimenting based on it.  That might have been an even more painful and embarrassing ER visit.    

Sheesh... more than 120 people have read that post now!  Including Sedona!

/Zin

I am going to stick my finger up some man's butt LOL I just would never do something to a client that I would never have done to myself.

MMM, you know it would almost be worth a trip to the west coast for. But how do I explain it to wife..........who was willing but not physically able.......

I know there has to be a provider in this area willing ot entertain it. Unfortunately my regular won't I am certain. She is real set in her ways.

Like Altoid mints, FFucking orgasms are curiously strong.  Kidding aside, I found myself up to my wrist with my second or third TER provider and through time have done the fisting thing with around six providers.  For me, it really is a thrill of doing something that is relatively unknown, but even more, the usual response that the provider gives me sends us both over the edge.  Quivering, shaking, off the charts orgasms.  I get a total thrill seeing that kind of bliss.  After 10 or 15 minutes of DATY with some finger drills, I can usually tell or sense whether a woman is either capable of doing this, or is encouraging it (or both).  Unfortunately, the topic is still somewhat taboo (ever notice that taboo ends with "boo"?)

Hey stretched. Email me at [email protected]