I have been a hobbyist for a few years and have a real problem with tipping providers for service. I know, most of them say tipping is appreciated but not required, but I am thinking to myself why would anyone consider tipping at all?? This is not like a restaurant, where waiters and waitresses are receiving below market wages because it is expected they will receive tips from customers to make up the salary differences. I presume providers are charging rates that will cover their overhead (i.e. hotel room, travel expense, and their necessary profit to pay for other bills and personal expenditures). They don’t need extra money to cover losses in wages; presumably the fee paid by the gentleman is more than sufficient. If the money they receive is not enough, than the lady should charge more to make it work.

Also, I am tired of the argument that you will get better service the next time if you tip. The service is all due to the ladies personality. If she is sweet and friendly, a true GFE, than you will receive that type of service every time, whether you tip or not. What is an extra $50-$100 going to do for you next time???? How much better can the lady be if she is already a GFE???

Now you are going to tell me tipping is a nice gesture, showing that you appreciate her service. I'll tell you how to show you appreciate her service: Come back for another visit, and shell out another $400 or whatever she charges for the hour.

Even though the ladies say tipping is not required, I'm not sure if deep down they expect it.

I dont know how others feel on the subject.  

Reoes anyone else have a real problem with tipping?

If we are talking about a GFE experience here then what is the problem with bringing your GFE a present just like you would a GF?  That's not really tipping, it is showing that you like her.

Once you find out what her likes and dislikes are then it should not be too hard to figure out a present that she would like.

In the end it is up to you.  It is your money, spend it as you want.

Let's cut to the chase. A provider is NOT your Girlfriend. Never is, and as long as you see her in this setting, never will be. Would you a bring a gift to a business associate? Giving a provider a gift to show you like her??? Is she giving you a gift to show you how much she likes you? I doubt it. I guess I don’t get the concept of gift giving either. If you like her so much, than ask her out on a date, i.e. see her in a non provider relationship. All she wants is for you to show her you "like her" by visiting her repeatedly and giving her cash. That's the real bottom line.

I have a client based, service oriented business (not sex related, but a lot of similar principles apply nonetheless).  Over the years, sometimes my clients have bought me gifts, or taken me out to dinner, or whatnot.  I never ask for it, they just do it.  I guess they do it to show appreciation for a job well done.  If I do a great job and don't get a gift, it doesn't bother me a bit.  But if I do get a gift, it is appreciated.  I do the same thing for other vendors, too (e.g., get them holiday gifts, take them out to dinner), and some of my vendors sometimes buy me gifts.  Year end presents are common in the business world.  A lot of businesses give various forms of gifts or other bennies to their employees or contractors.  I've had real estate agents give me a gift when I bought a house.  I've given tips to the guys who make furniture deliveries.  And on and on and on.  I think it's pretty normal in the business world to tip or give gifts.  No one expects it, but it is appreciated nonetheless.  It's just part of the grease that makes the economic world go round.

So I completely accept your insistence that we should think of this in a business sense, and analogize to the business world.  I just don't agree that tipping or gift giving is foreign to the business world.  On the contrary, I think it is very common, especially in any service industry.

Gift = Happy Woman
Happy Woman = Better Time

Therefore, GIFT = BETTER TIME
Q.E.D

Reoes anyone else have a real problem with tipping?

I personally have found that the men who tip tend you see you more and treat you better while you are with them.  One client tips every time he sees me and one day before a date he asked if I wanted to have a quick dinner with him. I said sure, off the clock because I know absolutely that he appreciates me and I, in turn, appreciate him. Would I do this for every one? NO. But in this instance I was happy to.

Haven't you ever had a provider go substantially beyond the amount of time you're paying for? It happens to me frequently, and when it does, I tip.

I think you summed it up quite accurately.  I rarely tip for the very reasons you mentioned here and frankly, I think guys who always tip are kind of suckers. $400 an hour already is more than ample compensation for a provider. Considering its far more than a brain surgeon or the President of the US make per hour, I'd go as far as to say that it's grossly more than adequate compensation.

Unless she does something above and the what one would normally expect from a GFE session, increasing an already exorbitant price tag makes no sense really. Guys who subscribe to the theory that tipping gets you a better session are sorely mistaken. A provider isn't going to alter what she does/does not do in her session (or the quality of what she does) simply because you brought her a gift or gave her a tip.

I'll never understand all these guys that show up with gifts, love notes, poems and tips for routine service.  Too many guys in the hobby these days forget that providers should be striving to please US in exchange for our business. We shouldn't be sucking up merely for the privilege of paying them $400 an hour.

This is when I think a tip is probably expected. Unless you want you lady to stop you midstroke and notify you of the time and that you must put another $300 in the cookie jar to continue, you should tip a lady who allows for extra time with no expectations. This will make you a welcome repeat client. And if you do tend run over a lot without tipping, believe me this type of info is passed on when ladies give references.

Another time a tip seems appropriate is when it is obvious a lady went well out of her way to make sure you had a good time. Changed her schedule to stay in a city longer to see you, brought your favorite kind of wine and maybe some other treat, if she brings special props you specially requested. or if she made a special purchase to make the evening more fun (I once got a Navy officer's uniform for a meeting with Navy Officer as a way to do a little role play).


Kisses,
Vanica

Unlike the President, providers aren't given free housing, world wide transportation, free suits from Calvin Klien and Armani, in house 24 hr waitstaff and chef, and not to mention free manicures and pedicures for life.

Giving your after-tax dollars to someone whose income is, or some portion thereof is, TAX FREE is the height of being ludicrous.  I'll start tipping when I start getting a receipt.

Reoes anyone else have a real problem with tipping?

"Even though the ladies say tipping is not required, I'm not sure if deep down they expect it."

Your problem is rooted in your perception and not reality.  Most ladies that I know do NOT expect a tip.

Who'd want to spend an hour with that dolt?  I'd need WAY more than $400 for that torture.

Reoes anyone else have a real problem with tipping?

The question begs are we talking angency vs Indie? In many case gents feel the need to tip agency girls who do not recieve the full donation. Where as Indy girls recieve the whole amount. I prefer to see only Indy girls and pay for my time used. If we ever go over I compensate the lady for the extra time as should be. I am in the service business and customers never tip me, I charge a high rate and provide a high level of service to back it up, That is what customers appreciate and why they keep comming back. I will be visiting a lady friend of mine next week as I have seen a few times before I will probably bring a small gift or card just as I would for any friend. Lets not forget this service business is a bit more personel then most. And as a lady friend once said to me "Hookers have feelings too."

treat others as you would want to be treated.  I will bring whatever the lady wants as a beverage, provide candles, soft music, and sometimes some small token of my appreciation when doing an outcall to my hotel room.  It's not the $ spent but the thought that counts.

It's factually true so it can't be that crazy.....the President makes $200K a year, that's less than $100 an hour based on a 40 hour week. That's before taxes of course, which the President pays on his full salary and you don't.

Anyway...not need to split hairs. That was a little extreme in terms of example but you get the point.  $400 an hour is a much more than generous wage.  

I don't fault the ladies though, I fault the guys that feel like they need to kiss the asses of the people that charge them these rates, let alone tip them afterwards.

but we tip them. I don't always tip, but always tip girls whose service is excellent. I don't want to go out on a date with them, but I do want to show I appreciate their efforts to make me feel good.

I don't tip.  But I always bring a gift.  I have yet to meet a provider who doesn't like candles.  So I bring her a candle set.  Read Wal Mart  here.  Not overly expensive but appreciated.  The provider I saw yesterday said I was the first client who brought her a gift. I still have a hard time believing that, because she is not a rookie.  AND SHE WAS THE SITE PROVIDER OF THE MOMENT!

The ladies don't ask for gifts, but the ones with websites have wish lists.  Not sure how much difference it can it make in the service she gives you, but for a $10 candle set, who knows?  

I don't know if I got better service by giving her a gift, but I enjoy giving a lady a gift, even if it is not an expensive one.  Remember, it is the thought that counts,  so we're always told.  You make her happy with a little gesture, aka small gift, and she will probably make you happier with her gestures toward you.

Also, think about all the gifts you would have to give a civvie in order to get what you get from the provider you are with.  And there are no strings attached with the provider, like there would be from the civvie you hooked up with for a quickie.

Bottom line is, what is it worth?  An extra $10 for some candles, not a big deal to a guy, but to a lady, who knows?  THOUGHTS!  

My $.02 or more.....

Happy Hobbying!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Do what works for you.

If you don't tip, and find that you get what you want, then do that and don't complain about people who do.

I do tip when I feel the service was worth it.  That works for me.  I don't care to see what it would be like to not tip.  Life is too short for that.

As to the compensation; first of all, $400/hr is not the norm.  Somewhere around $250-300 is, and that's not counting multiple hours sessions.

Next, consider all the work a provider has to go thru to get your ass in the room:  There is emailing, phone calls, screening, web site work, getting ads out on boards, laundry, hair to wash, dry, dye, etc., nails to be done, makeup to buy and put on, clothing to buy and wash, hotels rooms to get, travel arrangements to make and then you have all the NCNS and/or last minute cancellations.

I'm sure I'm leaving out a good deal of stuff too.

In short, it's a lot of time and work.

I will bet that for every billable hour, there are at least three solid hours of work behind it.

If you have a problem with tipping, then don't tip. Plain, simple, period. Why do you care if other gentlemen give tips?

PS. I like golf tips, and I like stock tips, other than that, the donation you pay is sufficient. I say it - and deep down, yes I really really really mean it. Clear enough??

Dang - this is like the second time in less than a week I've cheered at one of your posts!

Hey Mike, I'd be happy to send you a list of "horror stories" longer than War and Peace (and I've only been providing about 9 months now) if only you hadn't chosen to hide behind an alias. Then we can talk about just how generous that "wage" you imagine we earn is. Don't get me wrong, I love what I do, or I couldn't be doing it, but if you think that every single experience is the stuff that Penthouse Forum fantasies are made of, think again.

My all time favorite quote will forever be "Oh, I think I peed on myself", as he undresses. Followed by "Oh good, it was just a little bit" once he'd checked. How much is that worth to you to be the one standing there, trying to gracefully encourage him to shower after he evidently pissed on himself?

Note to the rest of the board: That was probably WAY too much information. My apologies.

First point, $400 an hour is above the curve. Most providers are far less than that.

Second point, good Christ, do you think we are machines?? What woman could spend 8 hours a day doing this?!?! I'm sure there are women who try to line men up like an assembly line so they can see as many men as possible each day, but most providers see only a few gentlemen each day.

Third point, the "wage" you are paying us compensates us not only for the rent and groceries we pay for today, but also allows us to prepare for that time in the future when its time to transition from providing to some other career. For most, that isn't a change that will happen over night. The financial cushion a wise provider sets aside will allow her to be ready to stop providing when she's ready, without having to worry about starving while she is kicking off whatever new adventure she chooses for herself.

Finally, if you are really that offended by such high rates, you can always check out CL to find ladies that request a fraction of that, or just cruise the singles bars instead.

to compensate them for the 50% split the agency takes. I never heard of tipping an indie as a usual standard and practice. I know some people provide gifts to woman because they're romantic, possibly single and are looking to establish an exclusive and long-term relationship.

I guess this conversation is really just to vent? What other people want to do shouldn't concern you.

-- Modified on 2/9/2007 8:56:10 PM

Reoes anyone else have a real problem with tipping?

I agree with Hardy completely.. If I gave a tip I wouldn't feel like I had a GF experience.. The envelope is the denial money even exchanges hands.. I am sure not going to have two envelopes

When asked how he could justify the fact his new contract would pay him more the the President, Ruth responded "I had a better year than he did".  Along this line, I expect, and surveys would suggest, that most providers are doing their job much better than the current occupant of the White House.

Reoes anyone else have a real problem with tipping?

i never have tipped yet and considering my finances don't intend to. I enjoyed spending time with most of the providers I have seen and am always respectful but alas I don't feel the need ro desire to tip. I make enough money to get by and have some "discretionary" income but I belive that by seeing the same providers on a regular basis that they we get to know each other and they would certainly rather see me on a regular basis then less frequently because of strictly the financial condition.
That said, if I am in a better financial state and a providor goes either above and beyond or its simply a great time, i would leave a little extra from time to time. even though I dont make 200-300 hour, its always nice to be appreciated.

I don't ask for tips, but I do have quite a few gentlemen who tip because we may have gone over the time we've set.  I feel that some may tip because most of great, interesting conversations, which goes well after a VERY interesting session. I think I receive tips at times because I've been told I have a very friendly outgoing personality. I may also receive gifts as well.  Interesting conversation after the session is very important and I seem to click with just about every gentleman I meet.  I've had gentlemen not go over the time and leave a generous tip and I always call to thank them (and to make sure it wasn't a mistake) LOL

I have some customers who don't tip, which is fine with me, they are great gentlemen and respectful of me and treat me like gold.

When I see a provider, I often leave a tip if her fee is below what other providers get for the same service.  Then I leave a tip to make up the difference.

Reoes anyone else have a real problem with tipping?

I don't expect tips but get them often. Why wouldn't someone consider it? I have a salon I go to often. They are so friendly there in fact I went there today. I always tip a little over 20% because they stand out to me in the way they treat me as a customer, even from the beginning.

It's not the lady's fault that some guys choose to do this.

I've heard of all kinds of poeple getting tipped, including a few guys I've known who tip car mechanics, the guy who comes out from triple AAA for car broken down, etc.

I have a friend who does legit massage & his best customer pays over 100 for a massage everytime. It's not required, he just likes to spend his money & feels that it is worthwhile to him.

Don't let it bother you hun.

Sara

-- Modified on 2/10/2007 1:04:05 PM

-- Modified on 2/10/2007 1:07:07 PM

And it is noticed & appreciated when a guy does that.

I had a massage recently at my place from a guy who works at my gym. Now he went over 90 minutes & then when it was over I asked him the fee embarrassed that I had not done so when booking the appt.

Well he said it was 85 for an hour & I said oh okay. He then went on to mention that he was there 90 minutes & I told him yes but I only booked for an hour. I kinda felt like he was pressing for more. It's not my fault if he didn't watch the time, most seem to know when the hour is up I've noticed.

Anyways, I did tip him a reasonable amt but know I can get it for less & just as good, so I may not use him again anytime soon. I actually like to tip but not when I feel it is being forced on me.

Many of my clients who tip do it before the date even starts.

Sara


-- Modified on 2/10/2007 1:16:36 PM

-- Modified on 2/10/2007 1:17:29 PM

I can believe it. My GF got like 10 or so gifts from different clients for Xmas & I didn't get any. I was a little jealous when I heard that. I don't have a wish list but have guys asking me to add one so they know what to get, the guys who do like to bring stuff.

I have a Valentine's evening business date this week & was thinking of getting him something but that is always too hard a decision for me cause most guys are attached. I'm afraid to get them anything. I thought of chocolate mabey?

Sara

I have a provider i see often who loves those Gel candles with the shapes suspended in them. It makes her day and costs me all of 10.00 + sales tax. A cheap price to pay to make someone happy imo.

Reoes anyone else have a real problem with tipping?

Well I've been doing this for 5 years and every time I see a lady, I always tip them regardless if I will see them again. Customer service is more important to me than the act itself. Even if the service is bad, it is chalk up as a bad experience. To each their own and I'm not going to change because we are all individuals.

Tipping is always optional and not required. Let's talk about something important like double penetration. Ladies are you for it or against it?

She makes really good points here. I think you should also keep in mind that we have to go through TONS of email/phone calls, do lots of screening, advertising, posting on boards, etc., not to mention spending tons of time getting ready to see you (think how long it usually takes any lady to prepare for a date). This stuff takes a LOT of time, and we are not compensated for any of that.
Tipping is always nice, but I don't think anyone expects it.

...I have had my share of providers (reviewed here, no less) who ended a session after the first cup, even when there was time left on session. Even if I had a great time, i don't like being rushed out before the time is up (Yes, I'm being chickenshit and posting anonymously).

And as far as business analogies go, most of the time the person you are spending big bucks on is giving YOU the gift in appreciation for sending so much business their way. I don't spend $10K on a piece of euqipment and then send THEM a gift.

(Just another perspective)

Reoes anyone else have a real problem with tipping?

I completely agree with you LusciousLissa!  I have a few clients that bring me little gifts, bottles of wine, or little stuffed animals.  These guys that do this have known me for a long time and see me almost everytime that I am in town.  I personally think that they do this out of appreciation for me and the fact that they always know that they will have a wonderful time with me BCD or not BCD.  I dont expect anything from anyone, tips or gifts, but when you do recieve them it makes you feel good inside that you are the gfe that they will want to return to again and again.

-- Modified on 2/12/2007 5:53:43 PM

What the provider has to go through to get ready for our meeting?? All of these costs you mention are valid, and should be encorporated into her rate. If the provider is spending money on advertising, laundry, hair stylist, etc., then these costs should be factored into her hourly fee. If not, then she should charge more, not expect to make up any short falls through tipping.

Go ahead and throw away your hard earned money through tipping...but you could prob. not tip, get the same level of service and be able to afford to see the provider more often (which is all she wants anyway)

I'm definitely for it. I love gang bang movies!

Reoes anyone else have a real problem with tipping?

well this IS a service industry. The donation a lady asks for is what she feels she is worth in the market she is located in. Each state and area is different. Even just 20 for a tip is better then nothing at all. These ladies work really hard for their money. They put up with a lot of crap from the guys that come to see them even on days they may not be feeling that great for whatever reasons. Show SOME appreciation in the form of a gift a flower or a tip.

If its a GFE come on lets be honest here. Those ladies are great. Most of them give a good deal of themselves to you. For the time your there you are suppose to be treated like your the love of their life. They take requests and fulfill fantasies. Its not like they are your typical wam bam thank you man girls. Treat them right.

Lack of tipping is also another reasons rates tend to be so high.

Reoes anyone else have a real problem with tipping?

I don't expect a tip nor mention on my website. I do, however, mention gifts. Not expensive ones but small things because clients tell me they would like to bring me something but don't know what I want. It bothers me to see providers ask for things like BMW's, Mercedes, Beach homes, etc. I wonder what clients think about that?