Well reviewed ASP’s may get appointment requests from out of state visitors. Hobbyists trying to follow the rules of setting things up in advance,  providing references, and offering flexible time frames are signs of serious callers & respect. The considerable effort into earning the $$$, requesting time off from work, travel arrangements, and fabrications to others about how I will be spending my weekend is what I am talking about. Once I’ve contacted you, and everything seems to be cool about our meeting, it is a giant pain in the ass to find out the day before, or the day of our mutually prearranged meeting, that you have changed your mind and my trip out to see you is a waste of time.

If I am making an extra effort to make your acquaintance & meet you,  please return some of the respect I’ve shown by not flaking out. If you can’t, or don’t want to meet after all, please just say so. If you said a date in the future would work, and it turns out it won’t, please just say so.  It is rude to not do so otherwise.

If I’ve confirmed our meeting and you doubt you can follow through, please give me enough time to arrange another date. If I’ve asked to meet with you, it is because I wanted to, not because I had nothing better to do.  

Now I’ve got to either bag the trip or start calling plan B, (Who I should have called first, but didn’t, and now is too late as she prefers e-mail pre booking) or C (not someone I’d have travelled to visit, but sounds like fun), or even D ( O.K. how badly do I want to salvage this trip?).

Please don’t flake out at the last minute and leave me alone and lonely in a AAA room in a city I’m only in because I came to meet you.

Thanks!

If not actually arranged, at least have one in mind so that your trip isn't totally wasted.

But don't mention to them that they were the 2nd choice.  

I would identify the provider on the local boards when this happens.  It isn't just an accident.

I've been is the same boat a couple of times.  If I travel to see a provider, I try to make it in an area that I would want to check out anyway.  That way I can at least enjoy the area if things fall through.  I also try to have some backup plans just in case something happens at the last minute.  I always look for somebody that is open to same day appointments if enough information is provided.  

Luckily, both times I have been in your situation I met a couple of wonderful ladies.  In fact one probably gave me the best BJ I have ever had in my life.  If I had met the lady I originally planned to meet, I would not have experienced that unique BJ.  

I hope you can salvage your trip in a positive manner as well.

I have traveled to see a couple of Sweetheart Providers.  Both I respect a great deal because both have gone out of their way to make sure that we had a great time... every time that I have seen them.  Sadly they both are not in my city as each is intelligent and sexy.  

Recently I went out of town, and had been told that because of where and when I was going (Las Vegas for the AVN award show..) I would not really have to make plans ahead of time. Ha!

When I arrived, I tried contacting providers whose names I had been provided with.  None were available.  (Now there is a surprise.)  I had the fortune to attend a pre-AVN show party (thanks to those who invited me).  At the party were a couple of Providers that I had attempted to contact.  We had the chance to chat!   All I can say is that the providers that I met were all of high caliber.  In fact, they made sure that I knew that were there time enough, they would be more than happy to entertain  me... (sadly there was not). In short, they were gracious and made me feel not quite so bad for "bad planning"!  

However, what impressed me about these ladies was that they did not flake out on their appointments.  Impressive.  Why some, providers or hobbiests stand folk up is a mystery to me.

I have had to cancel but in every case there has been a reason.... perhaps one that is noteworty was I had traveled to DC to be with a provider - she and I had planned an evening at the theater... to see a musical that we both wished to see.... unfortunately - I came down with a sore throat... and had to cancel... but I gave the tickets to her, as I would to any "date" civie or otherwise... why?  it seemed the right thing to do... Respect?! two way street....

So while I have never had your experience... I have had lapses of stupidity.  

This sort of thing should be posted so that other gentlemen are not similarly inconvenienced. So sorry this happened to you.

Sorry to hear about your trip. I would agree with those who suggested that you post on her regional board.

I’ve been stood up by a half dozen providers in my travels over the years. Three were true flakes, who often made appointments they had no intention of keeping, but the other three had to make emergency room visits with their children. I took my chances with the flakes, knowing from the regional boards that they had a history of missed appointments.

Missed appointments are a fact of life, whether intentional or unintentional, so I never travel to a new city for the sole purpose of seeing a provider. I am there either for business or to play golf. So when a provider doesn’t show, it’s frustrating, but not maddening.

Just maybe a reason for the "flake out"

If you use the same screen name that you posted with here, there is a possibility that the provider made the agreement to meet you then was made aware of the fact that you have reviewed a few TS.

This will make a few providers uncomfortable and could have possibly been the reason for the last minute change of heart.

I am in no way stating this is acceptable or even a profesisonal business decission, I am only suggesting that could possibly be the reason.

I'm sorry you had a bad experience.

Reear ASP's, please don't flake out when I get on a plane to see you

Anyway, the trip ended up as a wash. Back up plan A was on vacation, plan B was touring in Las Vegas and C never called back. Plan D and her friend showed up late and were highly overrated.
Guess I'll learn how to play golf.
Live and learn.