I got an email that disturbed me.  I want you to please let me know what type of advise to offer:

A hobbyist tried to see a provider several times.  After quite an expensive go-around (him getting the room to meet) he found out she was jacking him around because of a post he made.  Now he's concerned that she'll retaliate further with his personal information he gave while setting up their date.  She's admitted to not meeting him and playing games because of his post.  

Any advise from those with similar situations would be appreciated.

I don't know what kind of post the guy made, and how offensive it was. However it looks like the provider got her revenge. Using his personal info just because of a post sounds like too much. The word could get around that she does that and not many hobbyists like that. Thus I guess it won't go farther than that. Best thing to do is stay away from her and never offense her again.

Tell this "hobbyist" that it's probably a good idea to diffuse the situation with the provider somehow. I don't know the specific situation, or the content of the post, so I really can't offer advice on what to say or do that would mitigate the ire of this provider.  

It seems to me that the post must have been taken personally, or may have been directed at the provider in question. I would also suggest that the hobbyist reflect on what was posted and if it was worded in such a manner that could have given offense to this particular provider. An apology and retraction of the post may be in order to resolve the situation.

On the other hand I hope the provider wouldn't deign it appropriate to reveal personal information about the hobbyist because from what I've seen on these boards to do so would have a severe and immediate impact on her business.  That means most of us folks want to remain anonymous; and when a provider breaks that bond of trust, it generally results in the word going out that the provider is not trustworthy any longer.  Business seems to cease, and so do revenues.

I don't know the relationship the hobbyist has with the provider, nor do I know what was said that may have triggered such a retaliatory response.  One thing is obvious, the situation needs to be resolved and someone has to take it upon themselves to move in that direction.

HPG

in any way, in this type of vindictive manner,

SHE"S FINISHED IN THIS BUSINESS!

Time for her to let it go.

JMHO

BK

The provider has already crossed the line (IMHO) by both wasting his time and causing him to spend money in retaliation for a post. She has the same right to post a response and tell him she did not want to see him, it should have ended at that.

He, regardless of the post, trusted her enough and was not so upset that he gave her both his personal information and TER handle (presumably) as he respected the TER community.

She, on the other hand appears to be vindictive and not trustworthy. I for one would never see or want to see a provider that behaved in this manner and would caution all about her ethics.

It is/was not playing games - it was crossing the line.

I've not been around here as long as others, and I'm taking my time to learn the etiquette. If I heard that somebody's trust had been betrayed - especially if somebody's private information had been betrayed - I would certainly have nothing to do with that person.

That's my personal opinion. In general it certainly seems like both childish and risky behavior.

I received an email from a provider that stated she would expose my hobby if I ever posted another review. Only 1 provider has ever asked me to NOT post a review and I respected her wishes and it wasn't her that threatened me. I believe she had me confused with someone else due to the generic statements in her letter.

She thought she was anonymous.
I have let her know that her antics, and her personal threat against family members will not be tolerated.