I’m actually asking this on behalf of another hobbyist, who brought it to my attention….   though I have experienced the same thing as well.


Can anyone explain, why some ladies do not seem to appreciate or even value regulars?  Especially those of us whom are very easy to deal with?


I would THINK, that once you deal with a client, and everything goes well, that you would seek to keep them repeating, versus continuing to just have random customers you’ve never seen before - no???


I’ve had one provider, who would even call ME, to setup a meet..     so after a number of calls, when I finally agreed for another meet, she shows up, and attempts to short-change/hustle me, over some minor bullshit.

Basically, her outcall rate was $200 for half, and $300 for a full hour.   I had told her that money was tight at the time, and I WOULD book her for a half, if she’d allow for TWO pops instead of just one, because I always lose the first one in a minute flat.

She agreed to this after some struggle, but then when she gets there and after the first round, she attempts to get dressed!!!!

So after I ask her “what’s up”, and she pretends to have amnesia for a second, but then after some struggle, agrees to go ahead and finish.

I couldn’t get back into it, because the mood had been messed up.

She promises to make it up to me next time….

So when SHE calls me a couple weeks later, I ask her if she’s still gonna make it up to me, and again she pretends to have amnesia…. and has an attitude almost as if she's doing ME a favor!


Now this is just ONE example, but I’ve seen and heard about many others, where girls just don’t seem to value and treat a regular right.


What gives?!?!?!

I've noticed that most providers don't show much appreciation for being a regular. I rarely become a regular of any provider anymore for this very reason.

Why this is such a prevalent theme is probably because there's no shortage of horny men looking to get laid.

In all fairness though, the example you cited IMO isn't a good one. 2 pops in a half hour? No offense meant but that's more of being a penny pincher than a regular.

I'm guessing here, but I'm gonna say because of the same reason married guys see providers in the first place, variety. After being single for so long, I fthought it was finally time to settle down. Now the thought of always being with the same woman, ughhh! She has her good points, but sexually I think I'd like something new every night. But, this is only me.

yeah you're right, that's not a good example..   I just shared that off the top of my head without thinking, cause it's really busy here at my office.

In my defense, SHE was the one who kept calling me, and I explained my situation on money was tight at the time.

I told her why I don't like one pop sessions, because they only last 2 minutes for me, and so she agreed to let me have two.

I thought that was for me being a good client...


but back to the subject, I know there's no shortage of "horny men", but allow me to ask the question -  is there not a big difference between them?

Not only that, but isn't it much easier to deal with someone you've already met with and gotten to know, then the oddball off the street?

There are many ladies that I have seen who I would have absolutely no desire to be a regular with. I have an ATF now that I've been seeing for a year. before that I had a regular for six months and another before that for a year or so (the previous two ladies both retired).  
Any good provider is going to want repeat business so I'm going to go out on a limb and say that, if you are having a problem, you are choosing the wrong ladies as regulars. Maybe you need to be a little clearer about exactly what you expect from a regular. I have heard some stories from ladies about guys making demands on their time or looking for discounts and franky, this is not what being a regular is about. A good regular is a good customer as this is, after all, a business.
I can say this, I would NOT want her calling me looking for my money.
I guess my closing reminder here would be that since you are the one doing the choosing it seems relatively simple to solve this problem. Don't re-book.

but as a last minute fill in if she can't book a full rate person.
 I think a regular is someone where there is mutual comfort at the fee, what the session involves and some basis for trust
 She may want regulars, but not regulars who pay a relatively small amount and want extra services. You may get those deals but I don't think the advantage of someone known outweighs the poor income return.
 If you were doing other things that rocked her boat (gifts, tips, funny as hell) then maybe. Or if you had a long history of being a full paying client (meaning an hour or two) then what you need might be ok with her as a rare exception.
 You need money to play this hobby, no two ways about it.
B

Anyway, what makes you think the majority of providers do not appreciate their regulars? I certainly am not one of them. So . . . don't rank us all in the same category. I tend to believe that your lady got up and left because your second pop probably took you forever to achieve. If I'm wrong, then please tell me, but it's hard to imagine. I can't even imagine doing a half-hour appointment. Luckily, my donations are very reasonable.

Hugs,
Ciara

is no where near long enough to get the full effect of spending time with you.
He would be cheating himself and missing out on a wonderful experience with a wonderful lady.
The only problem with a time limited appointment is that at some point we must say goodbye and walk away from you, only to look forward to the next time, no matter how far away it may be.

Just my opinion...
B

1.  You have a time set with a lady you've seen often, but then she cancels your 1 hour appointment to see a new guy with a multi-hour booking.  This brings IAATM into sharp focus;

or

2.  You check out your regular's reviews and she consistently does more with others than she does with you.  Makes you wonder what's the matter with you that you're not getting the same level of service.

This is an intimate business, not like being a regular at the neighborhood pizza joint.   A regular client should treat a provider well, not look for discounts, etc.   I prefer to pay regular ladies more, not less, because I expect (and get) so much more from them.

In short, it is a business, but the relationship has to be mutual.

-- Modified on 8/13/2007 5:17:10 PM

Some of the things I read on this board surprise the heck out of me, even with as long as I've been in this business. If an ATF disappoints you so badly, wouldn't you find another lady? There are plenty out there. Duh. . .  shaking my head in disbelief.  

Hugs,
ciara

-- Modified on 8/13/2007 5:24:44 PM

-- Modified on 8/13/2007 5:25:32 PM

and also, is this going to be another long thought provoking thread of yours, Nitescape? lol  

Just playing lol

If you book a lady for let's say 2 hours, then you have FUN for 2 hours, end of story.

Never had #1 happen to me.  How would you know anyway?  Would a provider actually tell you she cancelled you on you for another client?  Wow, that's low.

On the other hand, I've had #2 happen and it pisses me off.  It's even worse when she says that she has a "policy" of not doing certain things and everyone else is describing how awesome she is at those things.  Sure, one or two reviewers might exaggerate but when there are pages and pages of the same thing, you know something's up.  I tried to approach the subject in a thread on 'YMMV' but maybe I should have just stated it more directly like you did.

Most likely, it is you  

If you are doing something wrong, maybe unintentially or intentially, trust me~ she will react to it.

I book two hours and I'm pretty much a one pop guy. Why you say? Because intimacy, laughing, giggling, fondling, licking and all of that other good stuff is FUN. With a two hour booking there is no hurry to make anything happen. We relax and enjoy each other's company. The build-up is incredible and the climax's are amazing.

To be honest, I am really not certain what your expectations are in terms of "valuing" a regular?

These days, I would say that the overwhelming majority of my appointments are with regulars. I love them to death, and I am pretty certain they know how glad I am to see them come back again.

When they call me on the phone, I know their voice and their name. When they show up at my door, I let them know how happy I am to see them again. When I raise my rates, as I did not long ago, I let them know the donation they gave me the first time they met me will always be the same. But I don't offer discounts, I don't call them or e-mail them out of the blue, and I don't give 'freebies'. So am I valuing them or not? I am really not certain what you are looking for in terms of 'valuing' regulars.

If the client is rude and lacking in hygiene, I agree.  But there is another explanation.  She finds us unattractive in some way: ethnicity, facial looks, body type and expresses it by restricting her services.

I am always courteous prompt and clean. There are 3 or 4 providers I have seen more than once who refuse to DFK me, yet most of their reviews say they do this.  And yes, I brush my teeth and hit the Listerine strips before I see them.  Since it has occurred more than once, I can't believe I only get them on bad days.  I can believe that a couple of reviewers might be lying, but not all of them.  The only explanation in my cases is: it's the providers.  I go to them now only when I have no other options.  Even without DFK, they are pretty good, if not the entire package that I want.

Providers, like all people, have their preferences.  Who's to say they don't act on them, even unconsciously?

Some providers are all business with all their clients.  There is one provider that I almost never go to anymore but I had seen her more than once and she never seemed to remember me.  I think she really does not want to any kind of emotional investment in her clients.  I understand and accept that.  If I see her again, it's just about "fuck and run" but that's the way she set it up.  If want something more intimate I see my ATF.

My ATF and I developed a good rapport immediately.  She can speak intelligently about things I care about and has a great sense of humor.  She says that I am the only client that she allows as much foreplay as she does.  At first I thought it was just hype, but having read her subsequent reviews, I now believe her.

On top of that, she always remembers what we talked about at the last session.  We like each other a lot as people, and that makes our time much more exciting than if she just saw me as an ATM with a penis, or if I just saw her as a pussy machine.

She never offers discounts, or freebies.  Once I stayed over a little extra so we could have light meal together and keep talking - but, we've never done it since and I don't ask for, or expect it.  

During the hour that I'm with her, I feel totally valued.

but it sounds like the provider was probably hard up for cash (?).

"On top of that, she always remembers what we talked about at the last session."

I think, for those looking for more than "Wham/bamm!", if you find a lady who remembers things about you from prior meetings, she's worth her weight in gold. How nice to share something and have it remembered the next time. And how dissapointing to find out a lady was just feigning interest or saying what she thought you wanted to hear so you'd return.

Being someone interested in many areas of life, and learning about more, I'm not looking for a lady to have the same opinion/experiences as me. Just that she be genuine during our time together. And one of the fun things is finding a shared interest and conversing electronically between dates.

if all providers treated their regs  as you do, everyone would be happy.!!!!

just my .02

I can't speak for other girls, but I'd rather see someone I've already seen (a regular type) than someone new because at least I know who they are (no additional scary screening,) I am more relaxed and willing to spend more time with them. For me, if you're more familiar to me, then I am way more relaxed, willing to chat more and chill and try new things.

I for one really value my "regular lovers" and that is what they know they are. I have some who see me every single week and I really appreciate their business. Not just their company. Case in point, I have one gentleman who has booked me every single week since the end of March, sometimes more than once a week and he has never seen the same outfit or piece of lingerie twice. I go out of my way to make it interesting for him and he is always expecting something new and different. He doesn't pressure me to do that but it is part of "our" relationship.  I feel great doing it for him, why??? Because he IS a regular and he DOES get special treatment because of that.  

I feel like the sex is better too. I have had a few really great guys who are not regulars that were awesome to be with but we just did not click.  They were young, handsome, great bodies and good personalities. But there wasn't any connection. I would not trade my 51 year old, overweight one pop regular for one of them...why? Because he's a great guy and we connect soooo well. It's not just about the $ to every girl. Yes this is a business but I don't want a repeat client that I do not click with.

One other thing...I think it is extremely low class of you to try and get 2 pops in 30 minutes. If you know you are a ONE pop guy that goes that quick why don't you try something different to lighten the mood and extend the pleasure for a while. Have a baby oil massage, do some DATY and enjoy yourself before the main course. I have NEVER had a 30 minute appointment before but if I suddenly lost my mind and did if I guy popped fairly quick I would finish up the rest of the 30 minutes with cuddling, a massage and some kissing. I wouldn't even dream of starting a second pop in 30 minutes. That is too much like wham bam thank you ma'am.

Granted I do have regulars who see me who can only stay 30 minutes but they have never ever once asked for a discount. They have always paid for the hour because they have something...class.


Now I don't think it is wrong to do 30 minute sessions but I do think it was unreasonable for you to put that totally on her. She may have bombarded you with email and calls and for one I would stop seeing her just for that alone. There is no reason to call and harass someone.

Alyssa

And much like all things... some customers get better treatment than do others....  

For the most part, I don't expect "special treatment" as a repeat customer.  If it is offered I am grateful, but it is not expected.  And I have never been disappointed on a repeat visit.

I'm still pretty much a newbie in this hobby, but I only see one provider, and I see her on a regular basis, and she treats me very well. She values the way  I treat her, the way I respect the boundaries of the hobby, etc.  In the first few months of my entering the hobby, I saw a few providers, but none on  a very regular basis.   All I"m trying to say is that the  provider I see regularly  now seems to really appreciate me, and that makes me feel great, and makes me want to please her as much as I can during every session.

..and I love the feeling of going into a session with someone I know and like. I think the comfort level, intellectually and sexually, builds over time, and when you are seeing one person regularly, you develop genuine feelings for one another. I feel very close to a number of my regulars and love the time we spend together. However, I am able to appreciate it in the moment, and keep those boundaries in place.

I think that guys who expect to be treated differently as regulars are sometimes crossing a line. Sure, I do special things for my regulars when I can, like buying a special outfit or remembering their specific preferences.. And they do special things for me as well- it goes both ways. However, I think that what some guys may interpret as a gal "not valuing repeat business" may just be a sense of entitlement. Of course we ladies appreciate clean, respectful gentlemen whom we feel safe and comfortable around, but to feel that you are better than other clients or are entitled to something she doesn't offer- for example, multiple cups if you know she is a one-cup provider, extra time at the end of a session, non-business related emails or phone calls, greek if she doesn't do greek, a discounted rate, etc. -then you are the one being disrespectful.

All of my regulars are wonderful guys- they wouldn't be regulars of mine if they weren't- and I don't mean to cause controversy. I just want to bring up the flip side of the argument; that your expectations must be evaluated in order to assess whether you are being treated fairly. There have been times when I have stayed longer than paid for at a session with a regular.. and like I stated before, I will occasionally buy a new outfit for a special session or tailor things to a man's specific preferences as I get to know him.. but you cannot expect that you are doing her a favor which in turn entitles you to certain things. You are entitled to the following: 100% effort, clean and attractive grooming, punctuality, respect, and a good attitude. Anything above and beyond that is at her discretion.

In the example in the original post, I agree that she behaved poorly by agreeing to something and then going back on it. However, you did kind of put her on the spot by requesting something that is not usually on her menu. I'm not sure how I feel about that, as I feel that if you are paying for time, the time should be spent however you like. But I know not all girls operate like that, and you can't always expect them to make exceptions for you because you are a regular.

And finally (sorry, I know this is long) "regular" is subjective. I have guys who I've seen more then once, and I consider them repeat-clients. Then I have guys that I see more frequently- 2-4 times a month consistently- whom I consider more of my "regulars."

You also need to consider that both parties benefit from an ongoing business relationship- not just us gals. Both parties feel safer, knowing that they are not going to be in a bad legal situation or come face to face with LE. The gentleman knows what he is spending his money on- he is repeating with her because he is satisfied with the service he is receiving for the money he pays. He knows he will not be robbed or harmed by a bodyguard or pimp. In addition, over time there is a level of comfort and intimacy that can develop, leading to better communication and more intense sexual experiences and friendship. I think these benefits alone are significant enough to make the "regular" client-provider relationship equally beneficial to both parties.

XoXo
Marea

Wow, I think you guys took that one example and ran off with it..........


As Peter said in the first response, it wasn't a good example.


I'm not talking about paying less and expecting more...

what I'm talking about is valuing a regular in general.


If you have a regular, or even if you've met a client ONCE already, I would think that if you are comfortable with that client, you would want to have repeat bizness.

THAT is the question.


Just like any BUSINESS relationship, you treat your regular customers better than the one-time ones.

So please, let that one example go.  You people are taking it WAY out of context, and running WAY way far away with it! lol

you know how I do! lol


but no, I'm not really having any major problems getting what I want from the ladies I see....

with ME, it's more that I just think that certain women would do so much better, if they had better business sense.


You TAKE CARE of your regulars -  DUH!!!!!!!!!!!


For the women who keep seeing every Tom, Dick, and Joe off the street, there is another one whining about security concerns.

Go figure.

I agree.

I think some ladies have the one pop rule, so that they can book you for a larger time and larger rate, and then they try to get you to bust so that they can leave early.

Come on now, this is the classic hustle.

Don't tell me you're not hip to this maneuver?

Differnt strokes for different folks, but I'm not there to have a "friendship" time, I'm there more for an erotic encounter.

Now I LOVE to talk and all that other stuff, but I'm certainly not trying to PAY to do that ish.

I can get women to pay ME for THAT....

If the provider is open to "chopping it up" with no time penalty?  Then it's ALLLLLLL good....    but I'm certainly not trying to pay double what I normally would, so that I can engage in conversation and whatnot.


I'm basically paying for sex, a hot time, no drama, and to be able to leave with no strings attached.

No problems with other guys who want something different, but that's not for me, thank you very much.

Valuing a regular is just that -  valuing them.

If you have no distinction whatsoever between a "Larry" off the street, and me whom you have already met with successfully, then I just don't think that makes good sense for anybody involved.


The specifics are different with everybody of course, as everyone has a different "menu", but the POINT (I should have never given that example lol) is that some ladies don't give a reg any consideration/value.


I've given ladies gifts even, but many seem to have a very robotic way about them -  get in and get out.

It's not just me, I've heard from a few other hobbyists say the same privately, as well as I've observed the same discussed on another forum.


and by the way, on that example I gave, I tipped her AND gave her a gift..........

this was in ADDITION to the terms we had already agreed on.

SHE said that she would make things up to me on the next session.

She said this, because she knows she didn't take care of me right on THAT session.

So the bottom line is, that she took advantage.

Am I whining about it?

NO!

As someone else stated, I did -  I just didn't call her or book her ever again.


My POINT was, how DUMB of a business manner this is...    not just with that one girl, but with the many girls, who do not seem to give any extra value or consideration to their regulars.


You know it's funny, cause so many of you women wanna ask for gifts and tips and stuff, yet when the shoe is on the other foot, look how quick you are to say things like "this is just a business thing", and not want to show anything extra.


and for the SIMPIN, butt kissing dudes??? lol

PLEASE stop!!!!!!!


If YOU wanna be a sucker, then be a sucker, but do NOT try to take me there with you.

Thank goodness for some sanity!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


props to you

Oh please stop yourself.  lol


You know, one thing I’m seeing from SOME of you ladies, is just how majorly hypocritical y’all can be.

You don’t want anyone to judge you, yet look how quick you are to judge someone else.

I don’t’ see anything “low class”, about a 30 minute appointment, nor asking for a 2nd pop.  What is “low class” about that???


I wonder, if someone were to call YOU “low class”, for one reason or another, how you would react.


It’s just the overwhelming hypocrisy that gets me.

I do not either have rocking sex with them, or good conversation, it is just not fun for me.  I have some regs I love to see because they rock my world sexually, some where the sex is just ok, but because I enjoy them as people and so I still look forward to seeing them as well, and the best ones who make me cum like crazy AND I like them as people.

I have been fortunate to meet mostly great men since I began ... but there are a few men I have seen that were not a good mesh for me in the sack and our personalities did not click well either ... for me, I'd rather not repeat if it's not going to be enjoyable for me, so I have passed on requests for future bookings.

Hannah

Disclaimer: the fur is about to fly with this post. (I can feel it in my good leg

This post is a bit reminiscent of another that spoke of whether price was indicative of quality. It’s more likely to have a better connection with a client at a multi hour appointment. Pops are indicative of a lady who is countin' the minutes in her head until she can get up and go. I'd never for a second think of charging for more "pops". I’ve even on occasion forgone any time constraints and asked the gent for another "pop".

If you pick the right lady there is no hustle involved and hopefully no discussion of more cash more "pops".

I think you may have answered your own question with your statement "... if you are comfortable with that client, you would want to have repeat bizness."  Obviously, you don't make providers comfortable.  With the limited amount of "personality" you've shown on this board of late, I'm betting that you're convinced that you are a better client than what you really are.  Not ALL providers see EVERY client as a dollar sign.  But your attitude gives the providers that see you virtually no choice, and that's how YOU'RE viewed.  So since you ARE just a dollar sign to them, that puts you in a bad light compared to others.