This is something that really gets my fire going!..Honesty is always best, wether it be good or bad and there's a way to write a review if your scores for this provider aren't stellar too, but under NO circumstances should she say what you should give her or don't write a review!..you have to be honest with yourself and other hobbyists here if they are planning on seeing her keeping in mind everyones experience is different!...I hardly ask for a review to be written, because they just want to spread the good news on their own.. but even as a provider i want an honest review! ALWAYS
JAY
I saw someone a while back, name witheld intentionally, and NOT in FL or GA, and I enjoyed my time with her. I was thinking about what I would write in a review, but then as we were talking when I was getting ready to leave, she said that if I couldnt give her either a 9 or 10 in both categories, to please not write a review. I never mentioned a review to her, she said this on her own.
Now, I was a bit taken back by this and didnt know how to react. I'm still contemplating the review, but dont know what I will say.
Is this common to hear? Have any other guys had a similar request? I'm wondering with the times so tight for everyone, if the high scores are a necessity for her to get business. She has great reviews, so I dont know why she felt compelled to even say that.
What would you do in a similar situation? I havent written one because I dont want to deal with the BS if I am honest and give a score below what she requested (basically she did ask)
I can only imagine, after hearing her say this, how many of her review are inflated by other hobbiests to avoid any backlash she may attempt against them.
Thanks for the input...
Cheers
I posted this on the FL board a couple days ago, and the PM's flooded in about some ladies who are known for sending harrassing PM's and threats if scores arent changed. In my mind, its a bullshit move that will get her on someones personal list of someone NOT to see.
-- Modified on 10/26/2008 4:18:19 PM
I think I would still right the review, post whatever scores I felt she merited, and not bother to ever see her again.
That is downright rude.
I have gotten some scores that have made me wince. The numerical rating system on TER has sent my self-esteem down the tubes, I must admit. However, I would NEVER demand that a man give me a particular score. That's just not good business.
You write the review, and be honest, too. Don't let her bully you.
"The numerical rating system on TER has sent my self-esteem down the tubes, I must admit."
==
This just about breaks my heart. One, that's really not the intended effect of the rating system, but more importantly, you are an absolutely gorgeous girl and you have no reason to feel that way. And not to put too fine a point on it, you're obviously worth enough that men (and women!) will actually pay you for your time - that fact alone would make alot of civie women feel fantastic.
For what it's worth you did attract my attention some time ago, alas just days after I moved away from Maryland, to my great chagrin. You've quite a way with words and as a fellow autodidact, it impresses me 
I too was saddened when I read
"The numerical rating system on TER has sent my self-esteem down the tubes, I must admit. "
I live on the west coast, and don't do all that much travelling, so I will probably never have the oppurtunity of meeting you. However even in the brief time I've been a part of this board, I've quite frequently gotten a smile from your posts. I am saddened at the thought of you feeling badly about your own worth simply because of a few numbers on a screen.
You might want to keep something else in mind as well. The number system does not necessarily mean how attractive a lady looks. They are "Model Material" and "One in a Lifetime" Models and one in a lifetime often are very exotic looking, something you've never seen before. While they may be beautiful, that does not mean that a beautiful "Girl Next Door" look is not incredible too, (possibly even more so) but according to the rating she would be a 6,7 or 8.
As to the original question by the way, I would write an honest review, (good and bad) include the fact that she demanded a 9 or 10, and never see the lady again.
I do as well agree, and it is hard when you viewed the experience as engaging and thought you treated the Gentleman well and that both were enjoying the experience, to read the review and see it was Not as successful for him as you thought. It does knock you over a bit. I know I am not a 10, that doesn't bother me, looks wise, yet I put a great deal into the experience and when I feel I haven't accomplished pure pleasure for the Gentleman, I am disappointed, and that review does haunt me as well. I agree honesty is a true must, then again there are those who are also way to critical. Noone seems to feel thats an issue. Some results in a session are not the issue of the lady but the reviewer in fact. Some people are just difficult and noone will make them happy. This is why Honesty and being fair is so important.
can deal with being "rated". It is so subjective. You can prepare yourself to the max, pour your heart and soul into a date, and still receive "scores" that are influenced by the expectations (legitimate or otherwise), the preferences, and prejudices of the reviewer. I spent a fair part of my life under the threat of imminent harm during my military career, but I would be a total wreck if the ladies were rating me in a public forum. Thank goodness I don't have to see whatever comments they may make on the providers only board!
Katie - I hope you can find a way not to let it get to you. You know who you are and what you put into being a provider. And I'm sure you have many fans.
Cheers - Gregory
Write the review (if you want to write one) as honest as you see fit, and then don't bother seeing that lady again. Even if she is a 10/10, that last little bit makes her unseeable (is that even a word?).
b-
Be honest and score her the way you see fit...
I would love to write my reviews and have 10's...Oh well, thats never going to happen and it's just as well. I love getting wonderful reviews that are a real picture of who I am.
Imagine if every review was written the way each lady wanted..How would you ever be able to give this site any recognition. Honest reviews give gentlemen an insight to who they want to see and thats what your doing when you submit your review.
Yes numbers are important to the provider but lets face it each gentlemen ranks a lady differently. With VIP you gentlemen can fine tune your search and each lady get's an opportunity to show her best skills.
Kisses Haley
I have read the replys from mrfisher, butterflydust, balathazar and HaleyOrlando. I can only say that I am in complete agreement with what they have said.
but you may HAVE to either write the review or identify her now that you have posted this publicly on two boards just in consideration of the next lady you see and review. Your next posted review will raise the question of whether that lady was the one who asked this of you, and it would not be fair to her if it isn't.
As to the current lady, I have a different view for you to consider with the caveat that you, of course, should do what you think is right, and if you review, it should be strictly honest. Also, I want to be clear that I don't agree with her asking this, and it sure did put undue pressure on you one way or the other, so it was wrong on many levels. But, consider:
In keeping with your question as to tough times, if you quoted her right and didn't paraphrase, she did not ask you to give her a 9 or 10, she just asked that if you couldn't give her one, not to write a review at all. To give her the benefit of the doubt, she may very well have realized that the session did not go as splendidly as you or her wanted for whatever reason and was asking you for a courtesy, particularly if it was just a chemistry thing or something. You didn't indicate whether it was her level of service or something else that kept it from being 9 or 10 rather than a lower score, although you did say you enjoyed your time with her. Also, she did not go to the red flag level of insisting you not give her a lower score review or laying down an ultimatum not to. If she simply asks and then leaves it up to you, then if may lose some of the nefariousness.
Again, I am not trying to defend her, but just raising something to consider.
Just my 2 cents.
shouldn't the review include the description of the request to have a floor under the rating? that is part of the experience, no? i am new and simply asking advice.
That's a fair enough point, but, the purpose of the rating system (the performance part, anyway) is to give readers a sense of how they'll enjoy their time. If, as a result of requests like this, only the 9's and 10's show up and all the other times - which may be more frequent - when she's not at the top of her game, let's say they're 6's or 7's, then readers aren't getting an accurate picture of what their particular meeting with her may be like.
You're right, that's a good alternative way to look at her request, but still it leaves something to be desired as to the purpose of the rating system...
it is up to the reviewers to keep the system honest by not acceding to the request; and I, personally, would write the review with honest scores. However, I also think that her simply asking the question quoted might not be as bad as it looked at first blush.
I very rarely pay attention to any scores above a 5 anyway, but rather concentrate more on the narrative. If there is a string of 5's or bellow on performance, I typically won't go to the narratives.
good luck
Very good point about needing to write a review as it may hurt the next lady down the line.
I don't agree with your assessment of rest of it however, but it did bring up a good point that we should not lynch the lady.
To my mind, a lady is manipulating her profile and numbers if she requests that no one write a review if it does not have a 9 or 10. Even though it may have been a chemistry thing, I would think she would have said something along the lines of "if our chemistry was a little off, could you wait to write a review, until we have the oppurtunity for another date where we'll have a better connection?"
Simply saying "do not write a review if you can't give me a 9 or 10" is completely wrong, however you are right about two things. One, the original poster may have paraphrased a little without realizing it, and two, people can blurt out something that wasn't exactly what they meant to say. She may have been nervous about a session that she felt didnt go as well as she liked, and got a little tongue tied. (My tongue is usually in about 3 different knots and always saying the wrong thing.)
I think I would post an honest review, especially if the session was less than expected.
We all come here to get some kind of heads up, and I would also include her request in my review.
That was just wrong of her on so many levels.
Could also explain why she has mostly good reviews.
Had one of her prior dates been candid and honest, you may have chose a different option, and had a better time.
and glad you brought it up. I would like to know what the numbers would have been if her reviewed her with out the pressure of her request.
I do not believe she needs to be outed on the bosrd. just my 2 cents too.
Why do you do the reviews? If you do them soley to promote the lady you were with and help her out, then sit on it and don't write it. If you do them to share your experiences no matter how they turned out, post it. If you do it to further the hobby and protect other members of the hobby then you should post all your experience no matter what.
What you can expect...
if they are great reviews...you will accolades.
if they are honest you will be respected by some and not by others.(too much honesty is not always a good thing-relateing to perks not normally offered or bad experiences)
if you are a glass half empty kind of guy then yoiu can expect to have to move on and never repeast!
if the lady really watches her reviews and protects them, you can expects any number of things in a backlash(been there twice...and one was a lady that got mostly 9's and 10's... it cost me half my white list - I have now had to block them to protect them).
in both of the ones I wrote and got grief in return...I got dozens of PM's from guys and even a few women(who know the ladies through other hobbyists) that said it happened to them but they did not want to write about the experience for fear of backlash.
In neither of the reviews I wrote was I vendictive or even said that I would not return. I stated that it was YMMV, frustration or if the issue was fixed I would definately return as the service was good.
Good luck... in what ever choice you make.
I once had a provider tell me during pillow talk that she was so used to getting 10's that she felt hurt when she got a couple 9's recently. Are you trying to tell me something babe? It was a typical 9 experience for me, but I gave her the damn 10 so I wouldn't hurt her feelings. Guilty as charged people, but that is why I always say go by the details and don't put so much emphasis on these damn scores.
If you give out high scores based on a provider bullying you or the score is given to the provider for any reason other than she earned it, those of us who work hard and do earn the high scores are demeaned and cheapened. Eventually, you guys will have a hard time finding real "10" quality service because the real "10"s won't have any incentive to work for the "10" and even when they do, how will you discern them from the fake "10"s?
you have some pretty awesome cheekbones yourself.
Among other things........LOL
Just my opinion...
B
writing a review. Someone just gave her an 8 for looks, but a 9 for performance. I probably would have given her an 8-8.
I had a nice time with her, but we didn't click.
C'est la vie
I am sure we have all gotten scores we feel we did not deserve and our reviewer was unrealistic or too picky, and hey we all have our off days... a bad case of PMS and I don't even like me!! Sometimes, we just do Not click for some reason who knows. It does happen and yes I too am hurt by the not so favorable reviews, but it is what it is. Take the good with the bad and all and learn for future reference. I have read others reviews and then all of a sudden they go from a 7 to a 9 presto over night their reviewer had a change of heart? I always wondered what that was all about.
I do pride myself on earning my reviews, treating the Gentlemen I see very well and hope when they do write a review that they are truely honest. Not only do you, the readers of the reviews learn about me from them, I can benefit and learn about what my Gentlemen liked did not like and how they see me. So they can be very helpful for me as well. Yet if they are not honestly writen, they are not any good really.
I would suggest to you, if you planned to write a review do so, if not don't. Yet no matter what be fair, and honest about the review you write always.
Good luck...
Nicole
-- Modified on 10/26/2008 4:44:56 PM
She browbeats guys at the session for 10/10 reviews, and calls them/PMs them to vehemently complain if she gets a 7,8, or 9. Her last 6 reviews are 10/10, and it's a fucking joke.
This is something that really gets my fire going!..Honesty is always best, wether it be good or bad and there's a way to write a review if your scores for this provider aren't stellar too, but under NO circumstances should she say what you should give her or don't write a review!..you have to be honest with yourself and other hobbyists here if they are planning on seeing her keeping in mind everyones experience is different!...I hardly ask for a review to be written, because they just want to spread the good news on their own.. but even as a provider i want an honest review! ALWAYS
JAY
I didn't reply on the Fla. board because there are a few there who would not like what I am going to say.
I have been in this hobby for over 5 years and I have seen many ladies I didn't review for one reason or another. Several of the most "highly rated" most "popular" ladies on my home board are ones who do ask this exact thing.
I was told by several of these ladies, ones which, if I named them you would be surprised, "if you are going to write a review, I want 9's and 10's, or don't write it" of course they added please.
If you were to look at their reviews, you would see all 9's and 10's, mostly 10's. Now I'm not saying that they weren't deserved, but you have now brought a big question mark to anyone who is given those numbers, especially, when the reviews are not as frequent as one might expect.
My point is that the review system, for all the good it has, has some serious flaws and no matter what, the ladies need it to promote their business, so some will ask for higher numbers.
Whether we give them to them is our choice.
If the system is to work, we MUST write honest, and accurate reviews based on what we feel and how we judge.
But at the same time, we must be fair in our interpretation of that experience.
My 10 might be your 8 and vise versa. So there is an inherent flaw in the system anyway.
You stated that if they didn't stop, they would be "outed" and should be removed from TER or put on a "Do Not See" list.
What about a lady who gets a "less than stellar" review that is an 8, or someone says something in the review that she doesn't like, even if it's true, and she flips out and has it removed?
That happens all the time and some of the ladies you have seen have done that. Would you like to see them "outed" and put on a list?
Well, I can guarentee you that the 2 that I know about will NEVER be "outed" or removed from TER or put on any list. They are just to popular and have a very strong "in" with the "power players" on the board.
The bottom line is this,
either review her honestly and accurately as you see fit, or don't.
If you don't review her accurately, then you have fallen into the exact trap you are complaing about.
It's a flawed system, but it's what we have, so make the best of it and write what YOU feel is right and accurate.
Just my opinion...
B
Bob, your opinion is always valued.
I did say that ladies who do this on a routine basis need to be outed, but I never said they should be removed from TER.
Another point you bring I agree with, one mans 8 is another mans 10, and there is nothing wrong with that. But for a provider to ask that if its not going to be a 9 or 10, dont write one, that just isnt right. We need to have honesty on the board. We need the different opinions of guys on the board, or the board serves NO purpose anymore.
I do know ladies who have asked to have reviews removed for one reason or another. Do I think its right? No Does it happen all the time? Yep Will we ever change that from happening? Nope But if its brought to light, it may shed some light on those we may have wanted to see but may now reconsider that thought.
You make reference to 2 that you know who will never be outed, removed, or put on any list, they are just too popular.
Are these 2 ladies guilty of what I am saying here? If so, maybe some of the so called "power players" are ones talking about it via PM. All I know is the amt of PM's I got, from all over the country, shows that its being abused by SEVERAL ladies all over the place and guys are taking notice and talking about it.
I'm happy to see all the different view points on the subject, because just like yours is, all opinions are valued.
Thanks to all who have replied so far. I know its not a popular subject, but just think if every industry took what they perceived to be a negative review of their product off the lists. If we bought it, and werent satisfied, we wouldnt be happy because we were mislead into buying something it wasnt. Right? Till next time...
Cheers
There are no providers who are above being outed on this board. I happen to know who the provider is in this instance and I was torn betwwen outing and not. Because I have no first hand information, I will decline. The bottom line is that as much as I despise this person and her personal "spin machine" shill, I do realize that this is a business for her and would not want to impact how she earns her living. There are other hobyist only boards where she and her shill are discussed openly.
No lady has a right to complain about a subjective review, but when a review is authored with the intent to harm her commerce, that is a different matter snd should be addressed.
Just my opinion
And her shill. I have seen the PM sent to a friend where she offers extended time, various non menu goodies, etc in exchange for a great review, including numbers of 9 or above. I know the newbie that gave her a review with lower numbers than desired, and took a verbal (e mail, PM, phone) pounding by her and her shill until he caved in and changed the numbers. Would I out her? No, I haven't had any dealings with her, and have told the others to do what is right in their minds. Sooner or later she is bound to run in to someone who will not back down from her or her spin doctor shill. Many are catching on to her anyway, and the PMs are flying. Possibly when enough guys get the word, her business will dry up, and she'll only have herself to blame!
to write a review that is fair in your own mind and stand up to any passing drama that may result. The reviewers on the board would back you up, I am sure. I certainly would. And, the ladies on the board (except perhaps for this particular lady's close friends if she has any) would certainly appreciate your writing an honest review. Cheers - Gregory
...mature adults here...or at least adults.
If the lady is a pro, she has to be able to take the good with the bad. Asking for certain scores is a bush league move. In your shoes I'd be honest, even if one or both of the scores were less than 9.
With the economy the way that it is, you being honest is the best way to go.
I'm working to get my first review and I would not preempt a negative anything especially when I had a positive experience.
Raquel
It's simple. If she's a 9 or 10 and you were going to review her, review her anyway. If she WASN'T a 9 or 10, and you were going to review her, also review her anyway. Don't forget that, if she WASN'T a 9 or 10, with the Providers you're connected to, you will not see that one again, anyway.
In other words, pay no heed to her request. You are not a Board Member to serve her, but to honestly help us all out.
As a P.S. to this, a friend asked me why I've doled out so many 9's and so few 6's over the years, and the answer is really simple. One of my ideas of getting value for my ca$h is to try and put myself in situations that are going to be fun, with the right people, not borderline guesses that have a higher chance of a bad time.
You made a great point I was going to make - that you've doled out so many 9's and so few 6's because you actively seek out the women you are nearly certain you're going to have a great time with. Then you do, so you give them a high score, because you got exactly what you expected.
Think about it this way - the rating system would be most effective in one of two forms:
1. Providers get a wide variety of scores from all different clients and a conscious effort is made to deny deny readers any ability to know what sort of experience to expect (not a very attractive prospect - but you'd end up being pleased about 75% of the time); or
2. Nearly every provider would have nearly perfect 10's from every review, with the massive caveat that says: you must do a great deal of work to determine whether this woman is going to please you in every way you expect.
An approach like either of those two, while seeming very odd, would eliminate much of the expectation-bias you see in the reviews. Either you can't expect anything - so you on average are more pleased than not - or you expect exactly what you get and it's exactly what you wanted.
Of course there are a litany of things which complicate the above scenario, but hey I just came up with it by asking myself "what if every provider had perfect scores?"... it would change the way we read reviews and choose providers to visit by forcing us to do more work beforehand.
I'm very surprised actually.
To me a 10 should be "WOW! PERFECTION!!! I'll never forget that til the day I die and probably never have an experience that good again!!"
A once in a lifetime thing.
A 9 should be almost the same, no bad experiences at all, just possibly not as mind blowing as a 10.
Why should a 7 or an 8 be a bad thing? To me a good provider and accurately reviewed provider would be one that had average 7s across the board, then a few 8s, and maybe a 9 or 10 once in a great while. Surely the lady can't be blowing EVERY mans mind can she? Does every man honestly leave with the feeling of "That was truly once in a lifetime"
I'm very surprised at the general concensus that if its a good time you should give out a 9 or even a 10, even if there were a few problems. This really changes my thinking about the review scores. If this is the norm, than a 9 is more accurately, a 6 or 7.
-- Modified on 10/27/2008 2:22:38 AM
-- Modified on 10/27/2008 5:07:00 AM
I was NOT threatened. Reread the final paragraph in my original post. I received several PM's from OTHERS who have received threatening emails.
My question was simple, the provider said if I cant give her a 9 or 10 in a review, dont review her, its that simple. It made me wonder how many times she has done this in the past with others.
Truth be told, She wasnt a 9 or 10 in looks for me, but thats not to say she wasnt cute. I dont like pictures that are airbrushed to hide a true representation of what she looks like. She was still attractive, but I was simply taken back by her request and wondered if others have come across this. The service, while nice, really wasnt near what I consider a 9 or 10. 19 is the number of reviews I have, but doesnt reflect the number of providers I have seen. Some are UTR, and some simply ask to not have a review posted at all.
So I ask you, how are these questions "stupid" as you say? How am I making (undermining) statements intending on hurting someone? Thats not even close to what I am doing with this post. Hell, I received PM's from other providers who THANKED ME for bringing this topic up, because they know several ladies who do this VERY thing.
Based on that, its a problem, and the underlying tone of my question, is what do we do about it? Post a reply to the questions if you will. Like I said to bobb, EVERYONES opinion is valued, and I for one would like to hear what others have to say on this subject, including youself.
Cheers
-- Modified on 10/27/2008 3:00:48 AM
-- Modified on 10/27/2008 3:25:50 AM
I think you should write a very honest review. Try hard to be fair despite the negative feeling she ended it with. It might be a good idea to message staff in advance, in case she protests.
All of the ladies I've seen have been attractive, though none "stunning"... I just looked back & appearance scores run 7-8. Performance is (like the ancient Firestone tire ad) where the rubber meets the road... numerically, most FS is a 8, some 9s. The review numbers are a bit limiting, I had a very good time & wrote so in the description.
To interest me, a lady should have consistant reviews... if her average is 7, a range of 6 to 8 because of chemistry: YMMV. That should be expected.
In my experience, ladies whose reviews are up & down, skipping numbers... I'd end up with the 4 or 5. It's not worth my risking my hobby time.
With a fair number of reviews, I'd discount one low score, also one high (as anomilies) and consider the rest... because YMMV.
skb (8 reviews)
Never have and never will.
Takes longer to write a review than the total experience. Good experience, will call for another experience. Bad one chalk it up experience and move on.
Works very will for me. No bickering, back and forth and all that stuff.
Having met you already here is my take. You still owe me a review but that's a whole different subject lol!
I consider myself to be about an 8 in looks. Guys who give me a 9 are obviously attracted to women with my body type and looks. Guys who give me a 10 are obviously Highly Attracted to the way I look. On average I consider myself to be an 8. I don't get my feelings hurt when I get that, why would I? Who wouldn't want to screw a girl who is labeled "really hot"?
Secondly, I truly believe that most men base their judgments to see a lady based more on her Performance scores. Based on my scores I am a 9 or 10. I don't click with everyone, and not everyone who sees me has reviewed me.
That being said I rarely have ever asked for a review. I don't care what you give me in a review. My performance is not based on what I think you might give me in a review and I believe that women who constantly harass men over their reviews and scores are missing one vital thing...
Men Gossip. Men Backchannel. It is a fact that if you as a provider harass men about your review scores and giving you a review you will be discussed.
I think it is sad when an otherwise good provider gets hung up on reviews. I think that if more women concentrated on the level of their service instead of reviews they would automatically get the higher scores.
For what it is worth....I think that you should review her because it is NOT okay for a woman to harass a guy about the scores he gives OR dictate to him about what SHE wants him to give her. This is YOUR review not hers. Just because it is on her review page does not mean it is HER review. It is YOUR work of fiction right??
~Rae
VERY well said Rae, and for the record, my disclaimer of the provider not being in FL or GA was said with you in mind because I know I still owe you a review. I would also like to add I had a WONDERFUL time where I live now with a lady visiting from AZ. She is not who I am referring to either.
My encounter happened several months ago, and my reason for bringing it up now is I have been privy to info that it happens more then anyone wants to admit or talk about.
Imagine if you will, if EVERY business out there threw out a review that wasnt giving their product high marks, how would you feel? Or better yet, if industry told reporters that if you cant give our product a high mark, dont write a review of it. Doesnt sit well does it.
I'm not out to hurt anyones business, or hurt anyone intentionally. The ones I see being hurt by this in the short run, are the hobbiests, because they are spending the money on a preconceived notion and they may or may not get it. Who does it hurt in the long run, the ladies who are doing this. Like Rae said, guys do PM one another to find out if certain reviews are warrented and simply want another guys input.
You would be AMAZED how many times you hear, "I was being generous, in reality, it should have been 'this number'."
I'm glad this topic has gotten the response it has, because its obvious there are strong feelings about it. And I'm sure it will be an issue long after we all move on from the hobby. Till then...
Cheers
If you were going to write a review anyway, then write the review and score her honestly.
If she is not a 9 or a 10, then there is no big loss in not seeing her again if she throws a hissy fit. You have lots of other 9's and 10's you have enjoyed being with.
and when you get those harassing emails/pm's use your delete button. Or if you don't want to deal with it then just don't write one and avoid all that. That's the BS that cause providers to loose biz.
I find it rude, and probably would write an honest review and let the chips fall where they may. There are a number of ladies where I live who have all 10/10 reviews, I go by the "if it sounds or looks to good to be true, it usually is" rule of thumb.
the session (performance). Your reputation as a hobbyist will trump any attempt by her to bad-mouth you to other ladies.
Hobbyists, especially guys just getting into the hobby, are dependent on reviews to spend their money wisely. True, everyone's 10 is different. Isn't that why YMMV exists?