I believe that a date should be enjoyable for both (or more in the case of a three-some) participants. When I am with certaim ladies, our exploriation leads quickly to DATY as I want to please her oh so much. I believe that the lady deserves to be pleased even though I am paying for her time. If you get the lady pleasantly aroused, who knows what might happen. [wink wink].
to make a session complete & to feel he got his contribution worth ?
for me, it's a BBBJ requirement (ymmv).
but i usually seem to find myself enjoying DATY 
For me, no, it is not something I need. Personally, I am turned off by the prospect of one's mouth on another's genitals. However, there are plenty of gentlemen (and ladies, for that matter) who think sex is incomplete without at least one kind of oral.
I sure do love it.
this gent does, & he takes good direction too....
on what else is on the menu. I wouldn't say I require it, but i really enjoy DATY. If there are plenty of other things on the menu, I'm ok with no DATY.
I also like to give my vixen an orgasm when she is with me.
And since most ladies cannot have an orgasm from intercourse alone, I am fortunate that my desired goals please us both.
If your kitty is pretty, smells nice and gets moist, and is responsive to me, I am in heaven, and I wish that I could lick it all day and all night.
The hard part is trying to find time to fit it in with all the other activities in the time we have together.
-SR
I agree, I love giving DATY, I figure that I probably won't be able to give my provider an orgasm through intercourse, but at least I can try with DATY. Plus, for me it is a skill I need to practice. Every Civie I've ever been with liked my DATY skills and I need to keep that particular activity fresh. Now if only I could last longer with intercourse, but I digress.
I do love to DATY but only if the lady is enjoying it. After all, the enjoyment comes from the act of giving pleasure to the woman who is giving pleasure to you. I have found myself a couple of favorite ladies who love to be licked! The highlight of our appointments is always mutual oral sex for as long as I can hold out and for as many orgasms as they can stand.
I will see a new gal on occasion especially when I travel. If she's not into it or simply doesn't allow it I can still have a great time without DATY but the chances are I won't be calling her again.
The lady has to really enjoy it. Otherwise, what's the point? What's not a requirement for me is that the lady has a huge, explosive orgasm from it.
Some guys will stay down there forever licking and manipulating far past the point where it is pleasurable in any way.
that oral sex, or sex for that matter is one of the few ways a man feels comfortable showing affection, love, feelings, caring or otherwise his "softer" side. Also, oral is a more "sure" way to make "most" women cumm, thus more fulfilling for the gent. For women it is easier to show these traits verbally but for us guys it's harder for us to "verbalize" our feelings. So ladies, the next time your SO wants to go down on you, let him, he's only trying to get close.
I for one can use my mouth in better ways than talking if ya know what I mean.
-- Modified on 7/19/2008 3:33:16 AM
All but two allowed DATY, and the vast majority seem to love it, so I do too.
There was just one who didn't taste too good either, so I avoided that with her.
For the few who don't prefer it, I can always find other things to keep me happy. Lord knows a woman's body has more toys than Santa's workshop.
In one of my appts., I had not planned on doing DATY but in the heat of the moment, I found myself exploring her body and ending up there.
As said on the board, I enjoy the session knowing that the lady I am with is enjoying it too. Now, if the provider does not enjoy DATY, I will respect that and find other ways to give her pleasure.
G
...though i can understand it can seem that way at times. DATY is something i would absolutely loooove to make a hard limit, a no-no, don't go there please never ever, because i hate it hate it hate it. however i'm afraid that making it a limit would turn off gents who are otherwise decent, or make them feel like something's wrong with me/i'm hiding some issue, so i allow it but make it clear before any erotic activity takes place that i strongly dislike it and will only tolerate it for their pleasure.
and honestly, i don't think every man who enjoys DATY necessarily is wild about the act itself, so much as they believe it is a way to please a woman sexually, and a lot of men have their egos and whatnot very much wrapped into that. when gents find out that DATY is something that could only ever turn me off, 9 times out of 10 they don't want to do it. of course there's still that 1 out of 10 who just wants to taste, and claims not to care how much of a buzzkill it is for me. this i can deal with as being a submissive it's a plus for me to have selfish clients/partners.
"I guess then you have never had someone do it correctly on you then"
You know there is going to be at least one person out there who thinks that because you do not like it, it must be because it has never been done correctly to you.
There is at least one man out there who thinks that if he does it to you, you will suddenly think that DATY is the best thing in the world.
I agree with you, in that there are things I really do not enjoy that others probably find very enjoyable. There are also things I like that others do not.
So Lilli, stick to what you like, and make it known what you do not like. The men who enjoy what you like will continue to find you.
Not everyone is that sweet smelling down there--especially after the 8th, or 10th appointment.
Wow, the women must really love you....
Maybe not too tactful, but it's also TRUE! Other than simply being a jerk, or a cold fish, this is the surest way to turn me off completely.
Fortunately, I've only experienced this once with a provider- most are very conscientious about cleanliness.
I agree not everyone is sweet smelling down there but Im quite sure they take showers in between appointments, at least I do. I almost choked on my coffee reading what you said lol.
thanks Luv, and you're absolutely right. before i ever meet anyone, there's a pretty substantial getting to know you process thru email and phone convos during which erotic interests (and disinterests) are usually discussed. and i've found that how a gent feels about DATY can give me some good insight into his overall sexual personality and style and it will let me know whether or not we're compatible.
when the DATY topic is raised, you are right you will of course have those guys who are simply convinced it hasn't been "done right," and that they can convert me. these men will never meet me, because i know from such a response that they could never possibly understand or appreciate my submissive nature and we would not be compatible. if his attitude is simply "i love it, it's my favorite thing in the world," i'll ask him why, and usually the response has something to do with pleasing a woman. this too is a man i will never meet, because i do not wish to have a partner who is concerned with trying to please me. if his response is "i can take it or leave it," or even "i like to taste from time to time, because i enjoy the scent of a woman," then there is hope, because he either doesn't have much of an interest in it or his interest in it is purely self-centered. of course the best response of all is "i hate it too!" but have never had that happen yet lol.
If a lady said she didn't enjoy it, I would hate to do it. It is the act and above all pleasing that makes it wonderful.
that sentiment fits with my theory Dr. Joe, that most men who are so focused on DATY are really just concerned with trying to please a woman sexually, and it is assumed that all or nearly all women love this activity most, so that is what they hone in on.
while i loathe the activity physically, the psychology behind it is what makes it truly unbearable...the whole idea of a man being concerned with my pleasure, is completely unnatural and foreign to my way of being and thinking as a submissive female. so i try hard to avoid seeing clients who seek to please me in whatever way, through DATY or whatever else. this does not mean that i wish to see jerks, but rather men who are primarily concerned with having their own needs addressed and tended to, and who can truly appreciate being served by a woman and understand that for me, pleasing them is truly what makes me happiest.
Now, I never considered myself as a dominant male or the dominant type, but one of these encounters was absolutely mesmerizing, and it totally engulfed me. She too, did not like DATY and her attitude towards it was the same as you describe. She didn’t stop me but after just a couple of minutes I could easily see that it was a waste of time for both of us.
Her verbal and non-verbal cues for the things that she DID desire made me feel like Dr. Spock in one of his mind melds. The rest of the session . . . sent me to the moon.
The only part of her that was not submissive was the when she told me that if I ever wrote a review, she would hunt me down and cut off my nuts!
-- Modified on 7/19/2008 3:14:48 PM
It's about mutual pleasure. DATY is one of my favorites, so if I was with a lady who said she didn't like it, I think I might be somewhat disappointed, but not from a money point of view. I do like to do everything I can to try to please the lady as much as she is pleasing me. I love the intamacy, and you can't get much more intamate than stimulating a lady orally.
Just my opinion
for posting what I think about the topic.
I'm beginning to think we might be twin sons of different mothers, since I usually agree with what you have to say.
So thanks for saving me from having to put my thoughts into words.
C_K
I suppose this would be an apt thread to post this information.
Very prolonged DATY can cause nerves to get pinched in the lower neck and shoulder area.
I once saw a gal regularly who would not let me get away unless I got her off with DATY, but she would often take up to 30 minutes to come. I viewed it as a labor of love, but after a few months of this (We met monthly.) I started to get pains in my upper back and neck that were just horrible.
I saw an orthopedist and he wanted to know if I was doing some kind of strange yoga postures. (Yeah, that's the ticket.)
Long story short:
To avoid pinching nerves, it is best for the guy to kneal on the floor (A pillow under your knees helps.) and the gal to have her legs over the side of the bed. That way the neck doesn't get pushed back to far which causes the pinched nerve condition.
Play safe!
But it still ain't gonna stop me.
I like the kneeling on the floor option quite a bit. Another one that works well and doesn't seem to cause any neck strain is putting a pillow under your head while laying flat on your back and having the lady straddle your face. My ATF loves this position. She uses the wall behind the headboard for support in case her knees buckle when she orgasms.
Have the lady put a pillow under her backside to lift things up. It puts the gent in a much more natural position.
I prefer Option 2 as the gent can "catch" all my juices instead of the pillow..
Kari~~
Lady straddle the gent like she is riding a horse and ride his face til she cums ! 
Nothing like a good facial! LMAO
Sit on my face, cum on my tongue, and ride me like a horsey.
...and this only works for strong guys and, in generally, smaller providers. Standing 69. The ladies I've performed this on found it rather unique.
But as to the original inquiry....by all means YES, I love DATY SO if the saying "you are what you eat" is true>>>>>> "MEOW!!"
All these options are making me horny!
I believe that a date should be enjoyable for both (or more in the case of a three-some) participants. When I am with certaim ladies, our exploriation leads quickly to DATY as I want to please her oh so much. I believe that the lady deserves to be pleased even though I am paying for her time. If you get the lady pleasantly aroused, who knows what might happen. [wink wink].
I do not, therefore not every man requires DATY at all. If it happens, then fine, but I do not go to a session thinking that if it does not happen, I am less satisfied, and did not "got my contribution worth"
Maybe I am in the minority in this thread, but I think there are alot more men like me than the few who posted here.
I'm with you in this. The providers I've seen recently do not allow this, but I never left feeling that I didn't get my "full contributions worth." I've thoroughly enjoyed my time with each of them.
jhb
I very much enjoy mutual fulfillment! Not to satisfy my ego or feel that I'm such a stud- I just really love it when the chemistry is working such that both of us have a wonderful time.
I've gotten to where I can sense and read my partner on whether to try or not. Some ladys by body language or aloofness make it clear that they are here to satisfy me and I can go with that.
Other times the chemistry is obviously working and I go down on her. And even better when I ask her to teach me how she likes it!
One of my most fun sessions ever was a fairly aloof new 'companion' where by the end of the session things turned around and she was riding me home bucking and broncing till my face was sore!!! Loved every minute of it!
... yes.
It about attitude, slobbery tongue swirls and a fresh wax. DATY is too robotic and routine in name and action. DIve that hole.
A few years back I read an interview with a little group of retired escorts, 5 I think it was. They were asked what type of customer they had liked the least. One responded that it was the guys who started the session by telling her how good they were going to make her feel. The others all agreed. I don't pretend to know what percentage of escorts feel the same way. I do know that retired escorts can be a lot more honest than active ones.
Anyway, to answer your question, no.
I am well aware that many providers feel less than comfortable with non-penis sex acts. (Kissing, DATY, fingering, etc.) Basically, they have accepted a role to give pleasure. Being on the receiving end is enjoyable if you're into the person you're with, but kind of creepy if you're not. I hate to be doing something that might be creeping out a beautiful girl. So I ask straight-up if there's anything she is not comfortable with. She's usually glad to give me her "don't" list, and I play by her rules.
But on those occasions when a provider does want to kiss or DATY, then those acts do elevate the experience for sure!
I very much enjoy this...do you not as a provider and woman enjoy this as well? I want any woman I am in session with to be as hot and bothered as possible, and DATY usually gets you ladies worked up! So, yes, it is important, but not required, if you are not into it. That being said, every provider I have ever been with, has always enthusiastically said yes...
As a lover of the peach, I usually ask me lady if she would allow DATY. I haven't had one refusual yet from pro or non pro. There is nothing more wonderful than a clean, natural smelling peach that enjoys a lot of attention.
To feel her respond to the attention is a very great turn on for me and to witness a real "O"
from her makes my day. DATY forever!
I absolutely do!!! I love it more than getting a BJ!!!
Read the post on the Newbie board bout "Ingesting menstrual blood." jhb
50% of a session success is whether she invites me to touch her. I am a giver and daty and dfk is very important to me.
The vagina is a beautiful organ and I love to cherish it and worship it.
I love the feel and the wetness.
Vagina is my Heroin!
Require, no- but those who do enjoy it quickly become my favorites! I don't always want it, and indeed there are times when I do NOT want to. But it sure does bring a smile to my face! I'm pretty picky about who I will do it to. I'll agree with the others that a nice smelling girl with a very pretty kitty will have me "hungry" in no time. And very disappointed if she won't go there...
I like it best when she is really into it, and if there is some sort of chemistry going on. However, there are also selfish reasons for doing it- because I love it! The taste, the smell the feel of it, and the intense intimicy of it. That gets the ol boy hard as a rock every time!
The getting my money's worth doesn't really enter the equation. I'm paying her for her time and company. However, I have some limits, too- I do NOT do intercourse or fellatio. I never liked getting blown anyway, so I can see the point of those who don't like to recieve oral. For this reason, providers with other options on their menu (daty, gfe, kissing, toy play, a good massage, etc) are a necessity. Strait up full service suck and fuck specialists won't like me- and vice versa.
as for the positions- sounds good! I love it when she's on top.
As a gent, I can honestly say No, I'm not into DATY... well I'm only into it if its part of 69. Otherwise, not really.
Nope.........but sure can be fun and satisfying for all involved.
If its on the menu then I must have it.