wife had a long day at work....hubby had a long day dealing with neurotic clients....she goes to happy hour with her friends from work.....she gets home and eats the dinner hubby made......they talk a bit then she goes up yo be (after confirming sex is a great idea)........he gets stuck on phone with crazy client....goes up to bed and she is dead ass asleep...or pretending?  he goes downstairs, fires up the happy box, gets on TER, gets some ice cream and watch bill maher....then wake up with a stiffy thinking of the last great pro I was with. : )

You needed to follow her right up yo be. If you don't strike when the time is right, she might figure you weren't that interested, or it pisses her off that you hit her up for sex and then yak on the phone. Especially if she is like many wives out there, really no longer that interested in sex, but you are not totally cut off or rationed.

I don’t care how many “Secrets to keeping your monogamous sex life HOT” are printed in ‘Cosmo’. The desire to vigorously Six-Pack and then orally irrigate your partner’s anus all the way to the back of her tonsils precipitously drops once you LIVE with that woman. Your particularly poignant scenario included the added considerations of contemporary ‘two income’ households.

I think it is an oversimplfication that if you don't get it at home you'll look for it elsewhere and that's why men hobby. Most of us will look for it elsewhere regardless; it's just normal (and that's a simplification I can live with. No need to rationalize it. My take is that had you gotten laid with her last night, today you would have gotten up in the morning, go downstairs to the street for some coffee, see a fit 28yo in yoga pants in line, and think "hmm, gotta go check TER". Maybe I'm wrong with you but not with most.

which has been suggested more than once. But, try as I might, for the life of me I can't figure out how one can "orally irrigate your partner’s anus all the way to the back of her tonsils."  Could you please explain how one might do this without a tongue the length of a Komodo Dragon?  I'm afraid I've been missing out on some fun.

Similar to "She licked the residual slather of cum from my balls and then indicated her desire for a third round" in a hobbyist’s review.

Just having fun. "Residual slather of cum from my balls" is quite colorful, BTW.

Painting a “colorful” picture with words is task #1 for a mongering journalist. The coloring defines it from being simply pornographic prose targeted at "Neanderthals" as some would allege our readership to be.      
 

The first time I even thought about finding top-notch escorts was in 1996. My wife had started working second shift, and I was lonely. Our schedules didn't jive, and I wasn't getting any.

..at least in my case.  Lack o' nookie was a necessary, but not a sufficient condition for my entering the hobby.

Even more important was that somewhere along the way, I went from being the apple of my wife's eye to a sty in here eye.  I became one more burden for her, one more thing to be "managed", "dealt with", "handled", etc.  My jokes weren't funny anymore, my tales of dragon-slaying (speaking metaphorically, of course) no longer commanded her rapt attention.  It all became "…and when are you putting out the garbage?"

Take all those Cosmo articles about "How to Keep Your Man" and throw them in the garbage.  I can tell you the truth:  Men are terribly insecure creatures.  They need the women in their lives to treat them as being special, as if they are heroes (y'know, kind of the way providers do).

If every woman could learn that simple skill, providers would be out of business overnight.

My EX hated my guts but was willing to give it up once a month, right after her period.  She strung me along for too long with that routine.  I THOUGHT I did better the second time around...  NOPE!!   It's classic avoidance & has been over 2 years since the last time.  Thinking back on things she said when we were first together...  with little sex life beyond the honey moon...  there were actual statements she made which I did not understand the true meaning.  She has little to no sex drive.  
If wife would have sex on any sort of a regular basis, I'd not hobby.  But it's not ever going to happen.  So I find a professional Lady every so often to keep my sanity.

Because my first time was lackluster. I thought maybe I'm too fucked in the head to enjoy sex at all, let me try a pro before I give up. Good thing I did. Wasnt till a few women later that sex Became life changing awesome.

Except for I'm still with my first, virtually identical story.  Oh, except for me no sex ON the honeymoon...bunch of excuses why not and a bit better after, just enough to string me along and procreate.  Her thinking is she doesn't want it so that's my "for worse" and tough shit, that's what I signed up for, right?  Well fuck that, until I figure out my exit strategy I'm hobbying.

I was overgeneralizing; and yes, I agree with you that we as men also need to feel respected, desired and valued; I can imagine that when you feel devalued by your partner it's only a matter of time before one looks for some respect and value elsewhere