The last two providers I saw I don't think really screened me at all. They both had multiple reviews from well established reviewers (and each has their own personal website), although not pages and pages of reviews. But after a couple of phone calls, they were ready to schedule. One just asked for a reference but didn't know her, yet that seemed to satisfy her anyway. She didn't ask for any contact info on her. The other I had to prod to see if she wanted my work # but I don't think she ever bothered to call. This made me somewhat nervous to see them, but I at least had the benefit of the multiple reviews to believe they were legit. And it all worked out fine both times.

Even someone else I contacted who does have pages of reviews, never asked for any screening info at all to schedule me to be with one of the girls she works with (that girl was unreviewed - this was to be my first TOFTT), but then ended up cancelling when she later let that girl go for being unreliable (I checked -- she is no longer on the website). We did have several calls back and forth over the course of a few days but that hardly seems enough  by itself.

Is anyone else noticing this trend?

Being new to the hobby I am finding the screening process very tough.  I think it is a good thing!!  It makes me feel more comfortable.  Everything will be fine for me when I have seen a few providers.  This is my first post outside the Newbie board so, please go easy on me!!

I haven't been screened in my last three new visits.  However, two of them knew of me by board presence and I do show a lot of white listings.  Interestingly though, one of them was pretty sure someone else had tried to see her once using my TER handle.  So go figure- how did she know it was really me this time?

Two of them, I can sort of understand since I've seen a history of knowns in my area and have a good rep- but still, they can't know I wasn't an imposter.

The third one is a local known but just doesn't screen beyond the name you give her matching your driver's license on arrival and perhaps she ran my cell # through the avenue they have to check on hobbyists by cell.

I normally bypass those who dont' screen because how do we know they weren't earlier that day busted by their lack of care and are now turned by LE?

-- Modified on 6/21/2008 8:02:18 PM

. . . I provided references, one to an agency and one to an independent provider.

The agency called me back in just a few minutes to clear me, and the indie just got back in town and cleared me soon thereafter.

One of my references indicated to me that no one called about me, and I doubt they checked my references.

My theory is that because I have been in the area for a long time, my name is all over the internet. It is easy to screen without references.

getting into other people's business and telling them what they should do.

Pretty sure, professional providers know what they are doing, and get sense who they can trust and don't trust. Moreover, they will know how to deal with situations.

In every case, hobbyst is the one who panics makes every situation worse. Is there a place in the US where consensual sex between two adults a crime? Haa, the donation thing, there are a million ways to put LE on the defensive unless you are handing the envelope to an LE, then you are pretty much screwed.

If you want to stay safe, both giver and seeker have to be smart and work as a team and hobyst must think with their big head and avoid taking unnecessary risk.

My rule, only frequent well known, well reputed providers, don't bargain hunt on CL, and have a list of trusted providers for variety.


Has worked like a charm for the past 10 years.

I don't think I have been asked for anything more than cusory screening info in over a year. I cannot honestly remember the last time I was asked for a provider reference.

I would chalk this up to having a rather active board presence, but it happens even when I don't use my TER handle.

Nah, just more skillful for most.  There's always exceptions of course!

greatly increased levels of LE activity. Busts are rampant all over the U.S. but business is SO bad, and providers are hurting so much that they're taking on new clients without doing their due dilligence in screening. Ladies, wake up!




-- Modified on 6/22/2008 12:33:26 PM

Here is an answer mostly for Zisk. Lots of guys have no idea that they have been screened. For instance, if you contacted me then I would see that you have written 3 reviews in the  past 6 months for verifiable ladies. I would then write to those ladies and ask them about you. Even if you never used them as a reference. Secondly, lots of guys write from their company email address. This makes the employment part of the screening very easy.
I have ways of cross-checking phone numbers and ip addresses and all kinds of little tricks up my sleeve. There are also some methods that the ladies have agreed not to let you guys know about. So, don't jump to conclusions about what kind of screening the ladies are doing. We only drill you for more information if we are unable to get what we need without asking.

I never give out my TER handle and I don't send email from my professional site. All the cases I've described here were just phone calls from my private cell - no one ever even asked for my last name.

In the past when a first contact was via an anonymous email, I've put in the body of my message some work info for verification and general description of myself and offer that I can provide a reference if needed but I don't give that out until after contact is returned. But these were not email contacts.

That is scary. That is how a friend of mine ended up  in silver bracelets AFTER the appointment was concluded. Now she screens and no longer posts her phone number.

As Heather states, there are lots of ways....
I find that most men that approach me offer the info I need for reference.

Insanity unless you are self-employed or have control over company servers. No expectation of privacy...all messages sent or received are permanently stored on remote servers.  And subject to monitoring...get caught, even years later, be prepared to find a new job...

-- Modified on 6/23/2008 9:06:37 AM

one was a tremeandous provider in my area... she shared what she could do with me....  I almost HIRED her on the spot - to do some limited detective work for me... needless to say, I was impressed....  

in one instance I asked a lady about screening... and she allowed that she did it... said that there was a cadance with guys who had been around a bit... that just never comes with newbies or LE types... but that even so, she does a spot check to be sure that all matches...  and only once has any provider ever called my work number...   and that has been in over 5 years of hobbying  --- EVEN WHEN I WOULD LOVE TO HEAR FROM THEM....   just kidding...

most memorable contact... was in a biz meeting when my private cell phone went off... I looked and it was a message... so I thought safe right!??   wrong... one of my stripper friends sent me a pic of herself all nude and stuff....   needless to say, I shut the phone off.....

lol, one moron sent a threatening email on his business email account with email stationary giving his real name, business, address, etc threatening an outing if she didn't quit seeing me.


Saved it for future if ever needed!

If i were a guy looking and a girl didnt ask for info or just barely then i think i would be afraid of LE because they dont ask for info until they are booking you for the clink!
so if in doubt go without!