You make a good point and I won't argue that. If I recall correctly, she was sitting alone and not with clients or friends. If she were, yeah, that would be an entirely different story.

Like I said, I would not have done what he did but I thought it made a cute story with a happy ending for both parties. In this case, given all the circumstances and how it turned out, it appears to me, it wasn't a violation of "unwritten rules".

Remember, sweety, I said I WOULD NOT DO WHAT HE DID because my boundaries are in a "tighter circle."

Jeez! It's just an opinion. I'm not arguing this is how we should all act under those circumstances.

-- Modified on 10/29/2011 5:22:29 PM

Still, I'm guessing that shoving her profile/website in her face... in a public setting, bragging that he's "so and so TER handle who spams the boards" ranks up there with blurting out her provider name in front of her friends and family.  

Even if she wanted to spend time with him too, I would have taken a less intrusive approach.

In some of the previous incidents like this posted by TER members, one guy wrote that he met a lady he recognized... approached her, bought her a drink and gently asked "Do the letters T E R mean anything to you?".  I thought that was very smooth... very, definitely not intrusive as shoving a girl's TER profile into her face, lol...
Then again I'm just a fuckin drunk so what do I know.  

1)  What would I say to someone approaching me in this fashion?
Likely something along the lines of : "I'm sorry, you must have mistaken me for someone else." I would then make myself unavailable for further interrogation/exposure.

2)  How would I alert people here that there is someone going around with serious boundary issues?
If I knew their handle (which, in this case, was disclosed), I'd let the ladies know that there was an issue with a gent and if they wanted his handle they could PM me.  Those who find this behavior offensive would likely contact me, those who are ok with it likely would not.  When other ladies bring up gents with inappropriate behavior/boundary issues, I always contact them so that person can go on my personal DNS list.

My life would not fall down around my ears if something like this were to happen. Being recognized by a TER member in public as a provider would not impact my 'real' life.  It is simply an unwelcome, gauche intrusion into my 'working' life.  Even if a TER member were to connect the 'real' me and the 'working' me and decide to out me to in my 'real' life, while it would be somewhat embarrassing (not out of my personal value system but because of the societal perceptions) it still would not have a tremendous impact on my life.  I answer to no one in my private life and my other business ventures are not dependent on a pristine public image.  I don't delude myself that those I do business with think my bedroom habits are an important enough consideration in our working arrangement.

People often spend an inordinate amount of energy thinking others (other than the SO or employment situations where a morals clause is involved) give 2 squirts about them/their image.  They don't.   It's a very free-ing realization to come to... What I do, who I am, how I dress, what I think is simply *not* that important to the world at large!  People are too wrapped up in what OTHERS think of THEM to care enough about what THEY think of OTHERS.  There are the self-appointed, busy-body, morality police out there... but in most any town over 100k, they have enough to occupy themselves with that they needn't bother with me.  I'm simply not that important.

your tenebrous inscription which you have formulated which great scrupulousness and fastidiousness have administered a degree of exasperation which is foreboding a consternation obviating a unexpergated plenary cognizance and perspicacity.

it actuates a significant magnitude of cephalalgia and megrim.

because you are assholes. No lady could stand to be around you unless you paid them.

why should anyone be jealous of inferior taste, discretion and sensibility? what you call "game" others would call, crass, crude, stalkerish, sleazy and ungetlemanly.

of course there are streetwalkers and barflies.... have some game there.

You sound like the type that would do the same thing and think it is kosher.
You remind me of the hobbyist who meets me and then says, "Are most of the guys you meet as good looking as I am?"
Your egos need to be stroked more than your cocks!

is NOT game. It is much more intimidation / indirect blackmailing than anything. Know the difference.  

I wouldn't be surprised if she just played along so that she can draw less attention to herself and get them both the hell out of there as fast as she can.

On the other hand, if he DIDN'T shove her ad into her face, never mentioned anything about the hobby, and DIDN'T mention his TER handle... yet still got laid off the clock,
now THAT would qualify as 'game'.

Surprises me how some guys mistake being an asshole as having confidence & "game".

Lets face it. Many hobbyists have no couth whatsoever, which has nothing to do with why they P4P. Most hobbyists with a brain would nothave  considered to even sit down next to her let alone proposition her.
A gentleman isn't so scared of hurting a provider's feelings. No, he simply respects the lady and plays the gama the way it should be played. There is no trembling at the thought of making a first move in person. He just understands that approaching her like the OP did is pathetic.

You can continue to ignore my laughter, but you can see by responses that I am right.

You are funny! I am still laughing! Hoo Hoooooo!!  Ha Ha!


HalfHour