Much like any civvie female hints to a guy she no longer wishes to see or associate with him. And just like civvies; the varying degrees of subtlety pros use are directly proportionate to the level of daftness of the particular gentleman.

Not a provider, but...there are several options.  I regularly hear about guys that try & try to reach a woman, with no success.  Yet, she's still in business, so she would appear to have found a way of avoiding him specifically.  I've also known women that have told guys that they won't be seeing him again (thankfully not me) because he...fill in the blanks.  Personally, I think that's the better way, because it dashes false hopes, and may even give him the knowledge of why others repel him (hygiene, manners, etc).  Another lady told me of a guy that passed her screening, but she said he just gave her the creeps in his emails.  Remember, she's most likely gonna end up nekkid with this guy, so creepy would be a bad thing.

has it happened to me? yup... in one instance it was the result of a first meeting.  We both were not each other's type... she was a 10 in looks but on the chem side she was a 5... all the services I seek were there, but so poorly delivered I had no choice... After my review of her (it was under my previous handle) she e-mailed me... obviously she had not intended to come off quite that harsh, but still the damage was done... we went our separate ways, both happy and both still in the hobby....

she now gets 8-10s... every time.

When it happened to me, the service changed.  It was infinitely less inspired.  In retrospect, it was clearly an invitation to end the relationship.  Each succeeding session was worse and worse.  

I have watched a provider friend of mine do it and she just ducks the calls and refuses to schedule appointments.  Also, that sweet provider phone demeanor disappears and you can tell there is no desire to please.

So, I'm guessing that when it happens, you'll know.

I had one just not return my calls.  

It was particularly frustrating for me.  We got along very well and in the middle of our conversation SHE suggested that we hang out sometime.  I never brought it up for fear of stepping over the line.  I agreed and stressed that I would expect nothing but some good company and maybe a good meal.

A couple of days later I call, leave a message, no response.  A week later, same thing.  The third week, I get her but she says she can't talk, asks me to call the next day.  I call, leave a message.  No response to this day.

Somewhere along the line, she changed her mind and decided it would be a bad idea to hang out with me.  That's fine, but I wish she would have had the decency to tell me why.

Needless to say, I won't be going back for business.  A shame too because she's pretty, intelligent, awesome in bed and definitely not a clockwatcher.

kicking the poor schnook out of the bed, bumrushing his startled pale and pasty butt out the door, and tossing his clothing after him?  Or still worse, out the window, in front of suddenly very curiuous onlookers and passersby, just like in the flicks and bad sitcoms?

He would be hard put to misconstrue that message.

"Was it something I said?"

For me I would like the direct approach so just tell me and I'll move on..

It has happened to me a number of times. You meet a provider, you both get along well and you see her regularly, you realize you both have real feelings for each other. She talks about perhaps a relationship outside the business, you tell her you'll  think about it. Soon after this discussion, the client provider relationship goes south and she
stops returning your calls etc.  I've found that if a provider starts to develop feelings for you, the client, it's just a matter of time before the "no call" BS excuses start. I just think it's the way women are "wired".        

-- Modified on 9/18/2007 5:25:07 AM

i can see why the other girls are not falling all over themselves to respond. but i'm brave, i'll bite the bullet and answer.

if i see someone once, and there is just no chemistry whatsoever, i will not see them again. usually i am too much of a wuss to confront the guy and tell him directly, so i just never respond to his emails. after a couple of tries, they get the hint. the way i do things, no man gets my phone number until he has seen me once AND emails me sometime after that requesting it. so someone i only saw once and had a bad experience with would never have my number, so i don't have to worry about avoiding uncomfortable phone calls.


i've only had to deal with this situation once regarding a regular. i really liked him a lot and we had great chemistry (which is why he was a reg.), but the problem was over time he became emotionally attached to an unhealthy degree. for his own sake more than anything else i had to cut it off, and in that case i told him about it directly.

Personnal I tell them the truth. Or my version of the truth. LOL There was one guy that just grossed me out so much I couldn't tell him the real reason why. So I just told him we didn't click. Besides I do have a disclosure on my website that "I reserve the right to decline any appointment I deem necessary". It is a personnal choice that we all have the right to make.

I had to cut off a client because he said, "I'll pay you this time, but after that I won't. I'm not comfortable paying you"

I never returned his calls or emails.

He creeped me out on all fronts.

In my case, it never went far enough to go south.  When we last spoke we left it on a great note.  Which is why I didn't understand what happened.

I don't think it has to do with being a woman but with the social stigma attached to providing. My theory is she thought about it and felt that things could get more complicated than she wanted.

I just wished she would have told me instead of dodging me.