that you can't discuss with others like friend and families, but then again there are other facts about my life that I won't share.

Compartmentization is that rule so that worlds don't collide.

It works out for the best that way.

Especially on the first date. If I see a lady a second time, I'll open up a little more, but to honest, once the conversation gets going, I let the escort do most of the talking. Seems to work for me.

Whole sections of my life are off limits to anyone who doesn't have a sense of shared destiny with me.

Sorry, but that's just the way it is.

That doesn't mean I can't be very honest and sharing; it's just that nobody's best interests are served by me revealing information that "if I told ya, I'd have ta kill ya."

Once we get past that point, though -- there are a couple of providers with whom I feel comfortable sharing and discussing just about anything because I know they can be seriously trusted. But only the stuff pertaining to the person whose name they used for verification.

Are you for real?

I suppose that a "hobbyist" who has NO friends, NO family, NO co workers will spill their guts to a hooker.
The more I read your posts, the more I see and call BS. You seem more like a desperate "author" with an agenda then someone who has been in the hobby.

since I have none. When I'm talking to someone who's getting to know me, if I'm wanting to talk, it's about something that I'm doing in my life that I find exciting. But, However, I'm a much better listener than talker.

I mentioned in another thread that the boundaries of the hobby can create a space in which significant depth may occur, partially because of the absence of breadth of experience.

One of my earlier relationships in the hobby led to a great deal of growth for both the lady and myself. She was ready for a sort of spiritual inquiry which I was kind of uniquely prepared to help with and I was unaware of how profoundly important sex can be as a way of communication in a relationship.

We were able to explore these areas with a great deal of depth because we weren't distracted by all the other stuff that goes along with a relationship outside the hobby. When we did move the relationship outside the hobby, we found it very difficult to continue to relate with that kind of depth and, eventually, things fell apart- "The center cannot hold".

I'm always looking for people with whom I can let my guard down since I pretty much refuse to be anyone other than myself these days and have few reasons to be dishonest. It's no different in my search for providers than with any other friends.

If I feel there is a REAL connection, or VIBE, I'll go with my SS#, checking account, and routing #.  Now I can tell if she's a woman of high moral, and ethical standards.  If that proves to be the case, and she treats me really special, normally as a tip, I give her my debit card # and PIN.
I think that 99% of all poviders (including CL ladies) are totally 100% trustworthy, and ethical, and I feel so much closer after spending a 1/2 hour with them when I kind of open up.

Don't know about getting to that part of a conversation. Prefer it myself when the girl does not talk too much, and doesn't ask me a lot of questions either.

Lots of great replys. It boils down to each his own. I am not afraid of giving information about myself to the provider. I usually ask a lot of questions about them also. If I like them it helps build some friendship. I find the secession goes easier. I have found that if they don't have someone coming in behind me I get extra time. I am not afraid of being blackmailed!! I don't have enough for anyone to be interested in. I am like Letterman. I would just tell everyone publicly. I see one provider twice a month. We have become friends. I have taken her to dinner 12 times. I don't pay to do this. I do buy her a nice meal. If I have sex? I pay just like everyone else. Friendship does not mean free sex. That is how she makes her living. Finding a friend you can go out and eat with and talk to has made it worth the risk to me. But then to each his own.

It depends lol; with a gal who has been a long term presence probably.

Well it seems you have found some of the more open minded posters this board has to offer!  LOL!  Don’t worry, they see many serious question as something to be ridiculed rather than replied to, not just yours.

Contrary to Alfred_nose_bleeder I would be scared to death to give out that much info to someone I didn’t know.  I think any concerned guy would limit the info they share at that point to the minimum necessary.

However, for providers who have become friends, we share a lot.  The reality is there are some women in this business I trust to be more discrete than about anyone else, and the same is true in reverse.  I do keep some things compartmentalized as others have said, I think we all do.

just that it's HIS cum that i love sliding down the back of my throat. Did i say that out loud? hehehe

Share more with someone I'm paying to fuck than with family and close friends?

Some might delude themselves into thinking GFE means they're with an actual GF, but not me. I'm paying her for a service. I treat her well and am polite, but intimacy doesn't enter into it. Nor do intimate activities like kissing or going down on her. I'll never get how or why someone would do that with a provider. But that's just me.

I hope I help since that is part of my life philosophy.  I am often amazed at how much mens problem relationships mimic women's problem relationships... from verbal to physical abuse (really) .. to inattention to affairs.  (really)

I am happy someone feels comfortable enuff and trusting enuff of me to be open and unburden themselves.  Like I said.. I hope it helps  

Being with someone is not so totally about the physical even tho that is the mythology in this biz.

I mention this cuz I doubt these men are sharing this with anyone else except maybe their real professional therapists.

Sure but that doesn't mean that you always should. It is easier for a lot of guys to share intimate secrets with sex workers (including escorts, MP girls and strippers) because they are total strangers. It's pillow talk in a manner of speaking.

Should you? Well, I think it depends on the lady and the level of trust that has developed between the two of you.  My ATF and I are great friends and talk about anything you can think of including comparing our train-wreck ex spouses! We trust each other and we both that the stuff we talk about remains between us.

So, I don't have a problem. It is characteristic some people possess and some don't.

Why do people need to spill their guts? They do, it explains the success of social networking. It is like being silent, some people can't tolerate silence and some can.

Next time someone asks you question, be silent for 20 seconds, most people start talking. Just simple experiment.

I think Buddha said that. Whoever it was it's true. Learn to keep your own secrets. Don't be a pussy and don't tell people things they shouldn't know. You lose power when too many people know your business.